


The Sweetest Taboo

by StarvingLunatic



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angels, Angst, Demons, Drama, F/M, Fallen Angels, Family, Novel, Romance, Sexual Content, Wordcount: 100.000-150.000, Wordcount: Over 100.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-02-17
Updated: 2006-05-30
Packaged: 2018-02-10 17:15:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 21
Words: 101,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2033310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarvingLunatic/pseuds/StarvingLunatic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU. The angel Sesshomaru takes an interest in the mortal Kikyo, which is where all their problems begin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You give me…

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t own these characters. I’m going to acknowledge that the title of this story and all of the chapter titles are Sade song titles or pieces of Sade lyrics.
> 
> This is an AU where Sesshomaru starts out as an angel. It’s also a Sesshomaru and Kikyo get together story. I’m also taking some liberties as to what an angel could be and what they might do. Try to enjoy it anyway.

The Book of Enoch: 7:1— _And they began to go unto them and to defile themselves with them and they taught them charms and enchantments and they became pregnant and they bore great giants… and when men could no longer sustain them, the giants turn against them and they devoured mankind._

 _These rebel angels were cast into a pit for crossing the line as spiritual beings and going to Earth to be with human women_.

The Sweetest Taboo

1: You give me…

Kagura watched Sesshomaru with some curiosity in her red eyes while he did his seemingly new favorite pastime. Well, she considered it new because a decade was nothing to immortals that did not age such as themselves. They did not really comprehend the concept of time. Sesshomaru had not been doing his hobby for a decade, but she guessed and she was close enough. She was certain he would not give it up anytime soon. He had become mesmerized by a human woman and had been since she matured, or so it seemed to her.

The woman, pale with a river of inky hair, was not doing anything special. She moved about her home, cleaning and sweeping. But, Sesshomaru watched her as if no human had ever done such a thing. It was such a waste as far as Kagura was concerned and she did not see why he was so interested in something so dull.

Kagura eyed Sesshomaru because she did not know what to make of his infatuation, his growing lustful infatuation. She had never been so interested in a human and could not figure out why he was. He had been an angel of life and death for a very long time, much longer than Kagura had even existed. He had taken many human souls when it was their time to depart the physical realm and he had breathed life into their lungs when their time began anew. He had never bothered with humans aside from his work, but things were different now. Yes, things were very different now.

Sesshomaru was enamored with a human woman if his odd behavior was any indication of things and that was a bad thing. Well, calling it a “bad thing” was putting the situation very mildly. It could mean the worse news for Sesshomaru and that woman if it went beyond him stalking her. If he were to act in any manner beyond what he was doing now, it could lead to his downfall and that woman’s downfall also. He knew that, but he did not seem to care about it. At least he had not gone further than watching her, but things were probably going to go beyond that if he continued to be so fascinated with her. If they were lucky, she would die before he ruined them both.

“I don’t understand why you keep watching her,” Kagura said with a bit of an attitude. It was her usual style of speaking. The woman was just a human doing things that humans did. It did not seem interesting in her opinion. They saw humans do human things all the time, after all.

Sesshomaru did not even turn around to face the ruby-eyed female nor did he show any signs that he was listening to her at all. In his opinion, it was typically a mistake to acknowledge the angel in his company. He did not even really want her around. He just wanted to watch his human without having to listen to Kagura run her mouth. He knew he would not get such a gift though, especially since he doubted Kagura would leave him alone anytime soon because she did not have anything better to do.

The two angels both lounged high in the sky on a cloud. Well, in a way, they lounged, but it was a bit difficult to relax without a proper physical body. There was enough substance to them to rest in the puffy clouds, though. They did not have anything better to do with themselves than recline on clouds… at the moment anyway. That was always subject to change.

Kagura was, at the moment, an unemployed guardian angel. Her charge had recently passed on and she had not been assigned a new one yet. She did not expect one for a while now because she was rewarded with some free time for watching over her now dead charge better than most guardian angels did. She was quite serious about her job, but she was also known for her fierce desire for her own life rather than protecting someone else’s. No one knew where she got such a passionate want from, but some suspected it would one day lead to her ruin.

“She’s different,” Sesshomaru replied after awhile. His voice was distant, more so than usual because he was still mostly focusing on his human. He also spoke lower than usual, as if he was frightened the human would hear, even though not only were their miles away from her, but humans could not detect angels, or so most angels thought.

Sesshomaru was a different sort of angel compared to Kagura because his responsibility was quite different from hers. He merely knew instinctively where his charges were and he went to them at his leisure because he was not pressured to do otherwise. Almost all of the angels with his type of job were like that. He was responsible about his work, like any other angel, and made sure no one had to suffer more than necessary when he went to collect them. Sometimes, he held back to punish people when they were dying, but other than that he was efficient at what he did. Yes, most angels like him could be described in a similar fashion, but he still managed to bring his own personality to his work. Well, what little personality he had, most would say.

“She’s different how?” Kagura asked while leaning over a bit to peer over the cloud a bit more, almost like a child trying to sneak a peek at something. She focused her ruby red eyes on the object of her colleague’s attention, a human priestess. She believed the woman was called Kikyo, but she did not pay enough attention to be sure.

Kagura could only admit that it was rare to see a human Kikyo’s age that was still rather pure, which would back of Sesshomaru’s claim that she was different. Living point blank tainted people just a little and that was about all Kikyo had on her. Usually, adult humans had shadows, blemishes, spots surrounding their auras, dirtying their souls, but not that woman. It was an odd thing, but not impossible.

She did not see why Sesshomaru cared. Surely, he had seen other completely, untainted human adults before. He was older than she was and she had seen it a few of times. Maybe the woman’s purity was not what captivated the silver-haired angel, Kagura considered. _But, if not that, then what?_

“She’s aware,” Sesshomaru answered Kagura’s question of how Kikyo was different. He still spoke like he was scared the priestess might somehow miraculously hear his words and he did not want that.

“Aware?” Kagura echoed in a very puzzled tone, arching an eyebrow and turning her mouth up to one side. Her eyes shifted slightly from him to the human while trying to figure out what he meant, but nothing was coming to mind. _Why do I even talk to him anymore_ , she wondered with a tired sigh. He no longer made any sense.

“Of me,” he elaborated, still not taking his golden eyes off of the object of his attention.

“She’s aware of you? That’s impossible,” Kagura scoffed and then laughed. She went so far as to dismiss him, waving his statement off with a flick of her hand. Part of her wanted to believe Sesshomaru was just messing with her, but he was not known for teasing anyone. He did not have a sense of humor, after all.

“She looks at me,” he informed her. It was quite the strange thing and it seemed to be a trap that he was caught in. That human, Kikyo, she had looked at him before, really looked at him. It was almost unsettling, but it was quite fascinating. He was drawn to her because of it.

“She didn’t look at you. You know they can’t see you. She looked in the direction that you were standing,” the ruby-eyed female pointed out since that was the most logical thing to have occurred, adding a couple of hand gestures to help sell it. Humans never looked at angels, especially not an angel of life and death like Sesshomaru. Humans could not _see_ angels. The woman had to have just looked in his direction, she figured.

“Kagura, I have seen much more than you have in my existence. I know when a human is looking at me or in my direction. She has looked at me, more than once,” Sesshomaru insisted, sounding a bit annoyed that he was being questioned on the matter. He would like to think he was intelligent enough to know when someone was looking at him.

“And when did she do that?” Kagura inquired, sounding as if she had just beaten him in a little game because she doubted he could prove his claim. She even had the nerve to look haughty over it.

“The day that I took her mother. She was a young thing, standing at her mother’s bedside. When I arrived, I stood on the opposite side of her. She looked up at me with the sorrowful eyes of a child that feared losing the only person that she had in the world, but also with wisdom beyond her years. She took her mother’s hand and promised that the pain would go away. She kissed her mother and then informed me that I could now have her mother. She looked dead at me and ordered that I released her mother from all of the agony that life had given her. I did as I was supposed to and she continued to stare at me and then at her mother’s spiritual form. She thanked me and bid her mother a teary farewell,” Sesshomaru explained in almost his usual emotionless tone, but he let a little bit of awe sneak in there. He doubted that he would ever forget that day and usually one individual incident like that did not stand out in an angel’s mind.

“All right, so she saw you and spoke to you once. Big damn deal. I’m sure it’s happened before,” Kagura said in a dismissive tone, waving the whole thing off. Surely, every now and then some human noticed him for a second, she figured. It was not like the woman held an hour long conversation with him or stared at him more than once.

“Yes, every few centuries a human can see me or some other angel that should never be witnessed, but she was different. She spoke kind, gentle words to me. And she has seen me other times. She recognizes when I’m near, even if she can’t see me. She speaks to me and her voice is like nothing the heavens can offer,” Sesshomaru replied, coming very close to sounding dreamy.

His words shocked his companion to the point that it almost showed on her face, but she managed to control herself. _Sesshomaru sounds like a romantic_ , Kagura commented mentally. That was very unlike him and it was not good for him to start acting so unlike himself. It would just get him into trouble if his words hinted at anything more underneath his cold demeanor.

“Sesshomaru, don’t,” Kagura warned him. “You know the rules.”

“I do, but they mean nothing to me,” Sesshomaru said in his typical bored voice. He even waved her off, dismissing her words completely.

“If you care for that woman, they’ll mean something to you,” she replied in a slightly forceful voice, hoping that would get through to him to keep him from doing anything foolish.

“She only intrigues me. She’s just a human, after all. And you are one to talk of rules. You’ve been punished at least three times while neglecting your duties,” he countered with a distasteful curl to his lip, obviously insulted that _she_ would have the nerve to lecture _him_. He, on the other hand, had never been punished for anything because he was perfect and perfection could only be perfect.

She rolled her eyes. “Ah, sometimes the job isn’t worth it. I hate it when my charge is a fucking moron that wouldn’t know a good decision if it bit him in the ass. I’d rather be enjoying this lovely green world left to the humans,” she commented with a strange longing flashing in her bright scarlet eyes. There was some sorrowful, but wishful yearning in her voice as she spoke that last sentence.

“Why don’t you just go rogue then?” he asked because he was very sick of hearing her “I am the wind” speech that she had been spewing for who-only-knew-how-long. _For too long really_.

Despite an angel’s will not usually being her own, except for those that tried their damnedest, Kagura was stuck in the middle by having desires, but not acting on them. Sesshomaru suspected she was not long for the heavens because one day, she was more than likely going to evolve freewill and then she would go after what she ached for. Only a fool suffered when their goal was right before them, after all; or so he thought, anyway. And while he thought Kagura was many things, he would not label her an out and out fool.

Kagura only rolled her eyes to Sesshomaru’s suggestion of going rogue, as he knew she would because she had done it before every time he made the proposal. One day, she would definitely go for it, he believed. But, at the moment, she did not have it in her. He, on the other hand, was getting closer and closer to an angel’s worst nightmare – the moment where he would have to act. Both of their futures were inevitable, his was just sooner than Kagura’s and he knew that. He was prepared for it, or so he thought.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo attended to a young teenage girl in the small village that she resided in. Well, she sort of resided in the village anyway. The girl had been bedridden for the past few weeks with coughing fits and fevers that were coming on and off. Kikyo thought she would be able to help the girl with her knowledge of herbal remedies, but after taking care of the girl for so long and noticing that she only got worse by the second, the priestess knew the truth of the matter.

The girl was now panting and gasping in every breath that she took. Sweat gathered on her forehead as it had been for the whole day and her pillow was soaked beneath her head with her hair drenched, sticking to her forehead. She was fighting hard and Kikyo was helping, but they were both aware that the battle was in vain. The girl was exhausted and they had lost.

All Kikyo could do beyond try to make the girl as comfortable as possible was to wait for _him_ and she was very aware of that, but she was not too sure how she felt about it. The girl was in horrible pain, but she was still so young and she fought so bravely, only to be defeated in the end.

“Kikyo…” the girl breathed out. Her voice was so weak.

“Yes?” she replied softly, moving close, making sure the child could see her. Glassy brown eyes settled on her.

“Am I… am I going to die?” the child asked. She knew the answer to that.

Kikyo looked down at the girl with deep compassion and affection in her chocolate eyes as she nodded to confirm the question because as she glanced up she stared at the girl’s death. The girl struggled for her next breath and turned away for a moment. Kikyo knew the girl was frustrated. She had been so brave.

Sesshomaru looked down at Kikyo and then at the girl that she had undoubtedly been caring for. Something came over him whenever he took a patient from Kikyo and he was not too sure what it was. Everything was new to him when it came to the human priestess. The silver-haired angel disliked taking her patients because she eyed him for the whole time he was there. He was generally there longer than necessary when she was involved because she was there. She always looked at him, which disarmed him and discomforted him slightly. He actually felt something when he took her patients. He had come to learn that it was remorse. He knew that when those in her care entered his care, it appeared neglectful on her part, as if it was her fault. He did not take kindly to making her look bad.

“Don’t worry,” Kikyo told the girl in a gentle, reassuring tone. “It won’t hurt anymore and death is so beautiful you won’t even notice,” the miko promised her patient with a small, comforting smile.

Sesshomaru arched a curious eyebrow to Kikyo’s words before taking the ailing girl into his care. He wondered what she meant by saying that death was beautiful. As promised, it was painless and from the way the girl now looked at him, she had not noticed she died. Kikyo smiled a bit and waved slightly at both of them before they faded from view. She then went about her business after informing the girl’s parents of her passing in the best way that she could. Kikyo did not want to see the parents weep. She understood the tears all too well. So, she made herself scarce after telling them the news.

The chocolate-eyed miko had seen Sesshomaru about a dozen times in her life, starting with the time that he took her mother. Sometimes, she could see him more clearly than others, but she could see him. She noted he was a very apathetic looking fellow, appearing to hold no feelings one way or another for what he did. She did not know why that was. She was not even sure what he was. She just knew he manifested himself in a form that she could see when someone was about to die. And, though it might seem odd, she liked seeing him.

Sesshomaru was a sight to behold. There was something magnificent in witnessing him that Kikyo could not put her finger on. It was just the way he carried himself that made him seem regal. There was always a slight tilt of his head and his posture was straight, but not rigid. He was like elegance personified.

She also knew his presence meant someone’s suffering would end. He only showed up after someone had been battling against illness and it was obvious the person just could not take the pain anymore. There were a couple of occasions where his presence saddened her, lives that she had truly believed that she could save, but it seemed she was wrong. She did not fault him either and sometimes, in his eyes, she could see him telling her it was not her fault either. It was just those people’s time to go and nothing she could have done could prevent that. She managed to find comfort in those hard golden eyes because of that.

Kikyo quietly made her way back to her little, one-room hut that was just outside of the village and near the vast woods. To call the house cozy was being kind and to call it small would probably be an understatement, but it was her home and held everything that she had ever loved, which were mostly memories rather than anything physical. The tiny cabin was actually her mother’s home and she just could not bear to leave it.

The house was a good place for the fair-skinned woman to live anyway because it allowed her easy access to the village and gave her a chance to keep the forest free of vicious demons and other evil apparitions. This was a way for her to keep the village safe by keeping the woods clear. She did not mind that it was a bit of a walk from her home to the village, liking to take the little dirt road from her place to the small town anyway. She also enjoyed living near the woods because she could get everything she needed to live right in her own backyard if she needed to.

The ebony-haired priestess had a very simple lifestyle. The villager typically provided her with food in return for her services and protection from the demons. Sometimes, she managed to find time and gather food from the forest, but if she wanted a real meal, she depended on the townspeople. They did not seem to have a problem with providing for her since she did everything in her power to keep them safe from apparitions and to see to their health problems since the nearest doctor was about a three days’ walk away. Many times, they thanked her just for being “their” miko.

Kikyo strolled to the clear, clean stream that was by her home, having to maneuver through a few lush green bushes to get there. She was planning to get a cool drink of water, but she stopped by the stream and did not move. She could feel _his_ presence, feel his fingers nipping at her cheeks, almost smell him even, but she could not see him. She just could sense him and she knew why he came to her.

Sesshomaru moved around Kikyo like a mist. He knew she was aware of him, but she could not see him. She was the only person that ever sensed his presence. A few people over the millennium had seen him, but only she could tell when he was just there. At the moment, he was trying to touch her, but it was rather impossible without a physical body. He ached to know what she felt like and beyond that, even though he did not know there were even senses beyond touching her.

“You don’t have to apologize,” Kikyo whispered, sounding quite tender to ease away the guilt she just knew he felt even better than he did. She knew the angel had come to apologize for taking the girl, which was the reason that he had come in a way. “It was her time and you were only doing your job. I don’t hold it against you. I’m actually glad you’re around.” She smiled softly and he traced her lips with his fingers. “You’re the only company I get, except for the few occasions when the children from the village come to visit.” It would be nice if he could speak to her, but she accepted just being able to slightly feel that he was around.

Sesshomaru would love nothing more than to speak with Kikyo, even though he had no clue as to what he would talk about beyond her. She just intrigued him to no end. He was curious about everything in regards to her, her hopes, her dreams, her desires; her desires especially. He could tell her selfless demeanor belied her heart somewhat. She lived like a hermit and sacrificed a social life for the people, but he knew that she longed for someone, even before she basically just admitted it to him.

“If only I could speak to you. I would tell you how something troubles me. It gnaws at parts I don’t even have. I dislike that I took your mother from you, your only company. It was her time, but she was all you had and now…” He growled, upset that she could not hear him. Maybe she could tell him what he felt. It seemed like something no angel should do.

He was experiencing more of that remorse and guilt thanks to her. How could she affect him in such a way? He did not know and the angel could truly careless than nothing about the answer.

“Kikyo,” he breathed her name and it sounded as if the wind was trying to speak with her. A tiny breeze that was her name on his lips caressed her delicate cheek. _There has to be someway to communicate with her_ , he thought. There had to be someway to touch her, feel her, and he would figure it out.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo recalled lying down to go to sleep, but that did not explain why at the moment she was engulfed in pure darkness from every direction. There had been a fairly bright moon out when she had gone to sleep, after all. She recollected that the heavenly body had been shining into her home through her lone window, intruding on her, which she did not mind.

The priestess tried not to panic, as she looked around the void, hoping to spot something, anything would do. She wanted to know she was not completely covered in shadows. All she saw was an endless sea of jet black. Her bow and quiver would have been appreciated at the moment since she was unarmed and she did not know what was going on. To her credit, she did not fall apart as many people would to find themselves coated in blackness, but she was not keeping it totally together as she would have liked.

Making sure to breath at a normal pace, Kikyo balled her hands into fists to keep from fidgeting. _Just remain calm and try to think how you came to be in this place_. She then heard footsteps. The footsteps sounded as if they were coming from every direction, so she did not know where to look, but she turned around frantically, spinning in circles almost to locate the source of the noise. She could not see anything or anyone. Her heart rate increased while her body tensed. She was more on guard than afraid, but there was some fear underneath her hardened shell. And then _he_ was standing before as if he had appeared out of thin air.

“You,” she whispered, gasping as she spoke and she took a step back. Her deep brown eyes went wide as he stood before her, looking quite solid for the first time to her. It was almost like she could reach out and touch him, she silently realized.

“Kikyo,” Sesshomaru said her name in his usual low voice. There was an underlying pleased tone in his voice, almost like a purr, and a smile trying very hard to tug its way onto his stoic face.

The angel could not believe that it had taken him so long to come up with such a brilliant idea. It was so simple, but he had never tried it. He thought such a plan might be beyond him because he was not supposed to interact with humans as he was doing at the moment. It was obviously worth the try, though, because there he was, standing with her. Oh, he was very close to being delighted.

“Have I died?” Kikyo asked in a bemused tone with a furrowed brow. She guessed it was possible that she died in her sleep since going to sleep was the last thing she recalled.

He shook his head. “No, you are sleeping. This is a dream,” he answered while motioning around the void with an elegant sweep of his pale hand. He knew that other angels appeared to humans in dreams, so he figured he could give it a try. It seemed to work very well.

“Then you are a figment of my imagination,” she guessed, still appearing a little puzzled by what was going on. It seemed logical enough to her that he was just something that her mind concocted. She thought about him enough, so it would make sense that he would appear in her dreams at some point in time. She was surprised it had taken so long for her brain to show her such a thing.

“Hardly,” he assured her in a dry tone. At the moment, he was as real as he was going to get in regards to her.

“I don’t understand then,” she easily admitted with a deeply bewildered look coating her beautiful chocolate eyes.

“I shall explain. But, since this is your dream, perhaps you could offer us some scenery rather than this,” he said while motioning around the abyss once more.

“How would I go about doing that?” she inquired, looking around. She arched an eyebrow. She did not know what was going on, so he was going to have to start explaining things to her if he wanted her participation in what was happening.

“Just picture some scenery,” he answered in a calm, smooth tone. His words wrapped themselves around her and felt like they embarrassed her.

Kikyo nodded and thought about the area just outside of her home since it was simple and easy for her to picture. Suddenly, the void changed into the forest, right near the stream that was yards away from her little house. He looked around and fought the urge to smile because he knew she would go with what was most familiar to her. He would like to show her the world beyond her village and her forest. _One day I will_ , he silently vowed.

“Is this all right?” Kikyo asked curiously since he had not said anything and his expression did not change as he looked around.

“It’ll do,” he assured her.

“Who are you?” she asked him the question that had been on her mind since she was eight years old. When she was little, she used to make up names for him, but never thought that any of them were close. She was about to find out that none of the names that she had come up with were close.

“Sesshomaru, angel of life and death,” he introduced himself as if it was normal, even though it was the first time that he had ever uttered his name and job in the same sentence. Anyone that knew him obviously knew what he was and what he did already, so he had never had to introduce himself as he had just done. He did not often offer up his name because he did not see the need to, especially since his name had nothing to do with his job. Everything was strange for his tongue, but he was happy to be able to do this with her.

“Angel?” she echoed. Her eyebrows came close together as her face scrunched together in confusion.

“Yes, I’m an angel.”

“I don’t understand,” she confessed again. _Why is an angel visiting me in my dreams?_ She doubted that anyone would understand.

“I will explain it all to you now that I know it’s possible for me to manifest myself to you,” Sesshomaru said. As long as she remained asleep, he would be able to speak with her, to interact with her. He should be able to sate his curiosity once he comprehended her better. Of course, he was still going to be reprimanded by the higher-ups for going beyond his role and actually mingling with a human being. _Maybe she will not be punished for my actions, though_ , he considered. _After all, this is all my doing_.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Sesshomaru and Kikyo get together the only way that they can, in her dreams, and they grow fond of each other. Bad move.


	2. Kiss of Life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

2: Kiss of Life

Sesshomaru and Kagura once again lounged in the clouds. He had been there alone for a little while before Kagura popped up, rudely interjecting herself into his presence again. He tried to ignore her and focus on the one thing that he found himself caring about while Kagura busied herself by running her mouth. Sesshomaru attempted to just block out her voice, but as usual, she just kept talking. She would wait him out for acknowledgment and she knew she would win because that was what history showed.

“Sesshomaru, don’t you think you’ve taken things a step too far?” Kagura asked, referring to his new pastime. She knew about his new hobby of visiting that human woman in her dreams and she did not approve of such actions, which she had let her companion know more times than he cared to. Kagura could only hope things did not get out of hand in those dreams. A dream was just another realm of reality and what happened in a dream with an angel did not always stay in the dream.

“Nothing is a step too far now,” the platinum-haired male answered while glancing over at the sun, waiting for it to disappear below the horizon.

Once the sunset, Kikyo’s time became her own and he could be with her once again. All he wanted lately was just to be around her. It was like he craved this woman or something beyond, which was not something that he could comprehend. As an angel, he should not want anything, and to feel a compulsion beyond that was beyond his capabilities. He did not understand this craving, aside from just chalking it up to lust, which was what he did because that was something that he could grasp. He was thoroughly familiar with the seven deadly sins, after all.

“You could be banished for this,” Kagura pointed out, as if he did not know that information already.

She could not fathom how he did not mind the thought of expulsion from the Heavens. It was the only place they knew and that made sense to them. They did not fit in anywhere else and she doubted they could make it anywhere else. Was he really willing to risk all of that for that one woman? Was he willing to ruin both himself and that human for a sin? It made no sense.

“Kagura, do you know what regret is?” he asked in a dull tone, almost like he did not care. _She was such a whiner_ , he thought with a small, annoyed huff. She was so frightened of the unknown, but still desired something of her own. She needed to develop freewill soon or she was going to go insane, he believed, because her mind and desire where in two different places. Besides, if she finally evolved her will, she could leave him alone.

“Some human emotion that we can’t feel,” she replied in a dismissive tone. She waved the question off with a flick of her hand.

“You’d be surprised at what we can feel,” he commented dryly. He never guessed that emotions would sneak up on him, but ever since Kikyo had come into his life, he had been in for a lot of surprises. One day, Kagura was going to be in for the same set of surprises, but they were likely to be brought on by something entirely different, he figured.

“We can’t regret, Sesshomaru. It’s just not in our makeup,” she argued with a shrug of her narrow shoulders. They were not made to feel things like humans were. They did not have a vast range of emotions like that.

Sesshomaru decided he would prove her wrong and shut her up for a little while. “Imagine that you had the chance to live in the human’s Garden for all of its existence. You had a chance to run through its fields, to feel the wind on your face, and have the sun warm your skin.”

Ruby eyes drifted shut, getting lost in the fantasy. “I am the wind,” she muttered.

“But, you didn’t take the chance and lost out forever. How do you think you would feel?” he inquired. She was going to have to learn to stop trying to debate him on issues.

Kagura was jarred by the question and blinked hard a couple of times as she thought on it. “That’s regret?” she asked with a gasp. Her eyes were wide with horror as if she feared ever possibly feeling such a thing. If her face could have gone white, it would have from the shock and fright.

“Yes, it is,” he confirmed and she was speechless.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru floated around Kikyo while she worked around her home, doing everyday chores, like sweeping out dust and airing out her futon. He did not mind what she did, just enjoying being around her. She could not see him, but she was aware if his presence. She spoke to him because she now knew he liked the acknowledgment, even though he could not answer her back. She had learned that fact from his visits in her dreams.

He took pleasure in just hearing her voice. It was such a low, rich, almost deep tone that reminded him a soft rainfall. She was still very much an anomaly to him because of the way that everything about her seemed to enchant him. He now wondered if he would ever figure her out and why he was so attached to her. _Do I really wish to know why if I can just stay with her?_

Sesshomaru was not known for being interested in anything that went on in the humans’ Garden, which was what the angels often called the Earth. Human affairs were never supposed to interest angels, expect for maybe guardian angels. With the way that Kagura sometimes acted, Sesshomaru was not too sure that even guardian angels took too much notice of what went on in the humans’ world. Some angels became fascinated with humans because they were so different from angels, but he could care less than nothing about that. He did not care what humans did for the most part. He and many other angels just looked at humans as a job, much like a night watchman would view his position. Humans were to be protected or guided or brought to life or taken into death, but nothing more than that. Now, things seemed to be different.

Sesshomaru was in new and uncharted territory when it came to Kikyo, but he was more than willing to stay as long as she remained there with him. Everything about her whispered to him, called to him, begged to be unraveled and figured out. He was nowhere near figuring her out, though. She was like a map that he could not read to place that he did not know. He did not mind being stuck, but he would also like to know how and why she affected him so. There was something that he was missing. _Well, many things because this woman is a fascinating anomaly_.

The platinum-haired male wondered why Kikyo was able to see him at certain times. He wondered why she was able to sense him. She was the only human out of billions, alive and dead, with the ability to feel his presence without him taking a soul or activating a soul. She knew that he was there when he was not doing anything at all, just drifting around her. It baffled him and he was not any closer to understand how she managed such a feat.

At first, Sesshomaru considered that she was some special kind of human. But, when he went through the bureaucratic nightmare that was the filing system in the celestial world, he found that she was just like any other miko in her file. The file did not go into detail, as it was a rule to only have details of what happened to the human so far in his or her life rather than having the whole life documented while it was still on-going. Apparently, it used to hold the whole life, but mistakes kept popping up in the files because someone failed to take into account that humans had freewill and could change their minds. Sesshomaru was not sure how many of the higher angels kept their jobs with the way that they preformed.

Sesshomaru was distracted from his thoughts when he heard Kikyo gasped, sounding like she was in pain. He noticed her staring down at her left hand. It appeared that she had cut it badly while carving up vegetables for dinner. She was about to clean the wound when he leaned over her hand and breathed on the cut. She watched in amazement as the wound closed up. She looked around, knowing that he was there, but she was not sure what direction that he was in.

“Thank you,” Kikyo said in a low tone with a small, grateful smile on her face.

Sesshomaru was a bit taken aback by her words and the shock almost showed in his typically emotionless golden eyes. He was not used to getting thanks from the living, unless the near-dead counted as living anyway. No one that was going to be alive five minutes later ever thanked him, though. But then again, only the near-dead and the just born could usually see him and newborns tended to focused so much on the new world they were in that they never even glanced at him. He nearly smiled when Kikyo thanked him and he was not known to ever smile.

Stranger than the fact that he almost smiled was the light feeling that waved over Sesshomaru because she smiled at him. It was something that happened a few times because she had smiled at him before, but he still did not understand why he reacted to her smile in such a way. He wished that she could spend the rest of her life just smiling at him.

“What is she doing to me?” Sesshomaru wondered while shaking his head, as if that would help him figure out what was happening to him.

-8-8-8-8-

 _How wrong is it to sin and be aware of it all the way through, especially since I am an angel_ , Sesshomaru asked himself. _How wrong is it to bring such an innocent, pure creature such as Kikyo down with me?_ How could he even think to do such a thing to her? How could he not do it, though? It was something that they both wanted, he was sure of that.

Before Kikyo, questions like that had never even entered Sesshomaru’s mind. He had no idea that such questions would ever seep into his head before he came across her. And now, with her there, a time when he knew that he should be more angelic than ever before, he found that he was not. He guessed some might consider what he was going through as “human,” but he was aware that it was not. What he was going through was demonic.

Angels did not have the luxury of sinning. They did not have the luxury of choice, unless they evolved a will of their own. Almost no angel ever looked upon freewill as something that they desired. It seemed like such a useless, almost foolish thing to have. It was not helping mankind as far as they could tell. So, when some angels believed that they were evolving a will, they actually tried to fight it.

An angel just did not understand why he would need freewill. The celestial beings got along perfectly fine without a choice in their existence, so they did not see the point in having a will. But, it seemed to sneak up on even the best of them and it almost always led them astray. It always turned them into demons.

Sesshomaru had never thought about becoming a demon in all his existence. He never even thought about demons, which was a clear sign of his angelic nature. He had a job and he did his job with almost no thinking at all. It was a mundane existence that he never questioned. In fact, he used to consider that Kagura was strange with her fixation on the humans’ Garden. Kagura growing envious of the humans was a sure sign that a will was developing. Many angels’ first feelings were those of envy.

Sesshomaru had come to the point where he had an angel’s worst enemy in his system – lust. Envy was a safer emotion to feel than lust because envy only tore down the person that felt it. Lust could destroy way more than the person feeling it. He was not sure when the concupiscent feeling washed over him, but it grew stronger by the day. It was getting more powerful and tugging at him with every time that he saw _her_.

The golden-eyed angel supposed that a wiser being would merely avoid the subject that was making him feel such intense, almost audacious emotions. A wiser being would certainly stay away from the item that was going to bring about his downfall. It was the smart thing to do, after all. He just could not do that, though. It had already come to the point where he had made his choice, consequences be damned, right along with him and the object of his passion.

Sesshomaru could practically hear Kagura in his ear, telling him that should not do it. If not for him then he should think of the woman, he could hear the guardian angel commenting. It was not fair to her, Kagura would undoubtedly say; well, if she was in a caring enough mood and if she was around. She would tell him to think of that woman’s soul and not just the fact that he wanted her. Or even that Kikyo might want him just the same. He knew about what would happen, so he should save himself and the priestess. It was the logical and right thing to do. He was sure that annoying ruby-eyed female would argue such things.

“This is a new low. Kagura is actually my conscience,” Sesshomaru muttered, shaking his head as if he was tired. It served him right for spending so much time with that ruby-eyed guardian angel. He was a cherubim, which was the second highest order of angels. _So, why have I bothered to hang around some low-level guardian angel?_ He did not care to think of the answer to that.

Would Kagura have a point if she were there to present her argument, though? He guessed it was good that she was not there. He did not want to hear any good points because he had made up his mind. He was going to do what he was going to do.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo stood by the stream that was near her home. It was clear, bright, beautiful day and everything seemed so alive and happy. There were plump fish jumping out of the crystal clear water. Birds were singing through out the forest, proclaiming the perfection of the day. The air was still and cool, making the temperature just right, but Kikyo did not notice much of that anymore. She took it all in when she first arrived at the scene, but now she was beyond all of that. She was waiting anxiously for a certain golden-eyed angel.

Her deep brown eyes were cast out in the direction of the trees on the opposite bank, but she was not focusing on anything beyond what was going on in her own mind. She sighed. _Maybe he’s not going to show himself_ , she considered. She had been waiting for a while now. She did think it was possible that he had not sense of time. What was time to him, after all? He was an immortal being. So, it was feasible that he was just late. But, it was also plausible that he just was not coming, no excuses needed.

The ebony-haired maiden thought for a second Sesshomaru had gotten tired of her. She was merely a human after all and he had spent months with her so far. She might have lost her appeal to him.

“You like this stream very much,” Sesshomaru noted as he appeared behind her like mist before becoming a tangible form.

“It does provide me with food and water. I love this stream,” Kikyo replied in her usual tone while fighting off a pleased smile. It would seem that he had not gotten tired of her and he was going to keep her company while she dreamed.

“Love?” he echoed in a very puzzled tone, his face twitching slightly as he said the word. As an angel, he could understand holding favor toward one thing, liking it above all others, but only slightly. Love was a concept that was beyond him, though. What was it to love something?

“You don’t know what I mean, do you?” she asked, even though it sounded like she was more making a statement than asking a question. She noted that whenever he repeated her, it was because she had spoke of something that reached further than his comprehension did. There were so many things he failed to understand that she often took for granted.

“No,” he answered bluntly, gently threading his fingers through her ebony mane.

“Then I don’t suppose you think that you’re capable of loving something?” she asked, turning slightly and an elegant eyebrow arched as the words let her mouth.

“It is very much beyond me at the moment. Explain this,” he gently demanded, eyes on her face. He seemed to be working his way toward making requests of her, but it was a long road to travel.

Kikyo nodded, even though she was not sure if she had the vocabulary to do what he requested. She had found herself explaining some very strange things to him through the months that he had come to speak with her and spend time with her in her dreams, as they were doing now. She had come to gather that many of the things that were beyond him dealt with sensations and emotions, which just were not in an angel’s grasp. While he had seen many things, Sesshomaru had experienced very little compared to Kikyo.

“To love something is to have a deep feeling of fondness, affection, and appreciation for it,” the chocolate-eyed priestess explained as simply as she could. She did not want to overload him with information since he more than likely had no clue what she was going on about.

“Fondness? So, it is similar to liking something?” he inquired with an interested, but also perplexed expression on his usually stoic face.

She nodded again. “Yes, but it is much stronger than mere liking.”

Sesshomaru nodded to show that he somewhat fathomed what Kikyo was talking about. Love was liking something, but deeper than that. Perhaps he could see if that was how Kagura would describe it. She worked with humans and knew their emotions better than he did, most of the time anyway. Sometimes, Kagura seemed to not know anything about anything. She was just in her own little world sometimes.

“Do you love me?” Sesshomaru asked, his tone much different from a human man that would ask the same question. He sounded like he was asking any normal question, not something heavy and possibly life-changing because he did not know much about the emotion. He was not sure if it was possible for love to be felt for anything more than an object, but he would find out. He was not one that even believed he could like people, so he doubted that love could be felt for them.

“I suppose,” she answered modestly, fighting off a smile. She almost sounded amused as she answered him and that was brought on by the way that he had asked her. It was so casual that she could not help herself in being a little tickled by it. She was being honest with him, though.

Sesshomaru was the only constant company in Kikyo’s life for the past few months, which was odd since she only saw him in her dreams. Other than that, she could only sense his presence and it was extremely difficult to interact with him that way. But, it seemed only natural that he should grow on her. There were reasons behind her loving him though, aside from him being her only true company.

Sesshomaru was interested in the things that Kikyo did and how her mind worked. He enjoyed having conversations with her and she appreciated that. He did not seem to know it, but he cared about her, which she knew from speaking with him every night and the fact that he liked being around her even when they could not do anything together. There was also the way that he acted around her as time pressed on, his habits and mannerisms changed, but he did not seem to notice.

He did his best to be close to her. When this first started, he allowed some distance between their bodies, not much, but it was there. Now, whenever he was upon her in her dreams, he left little space between them and he often touched her. The touches started out simple, a hand to her shoulder or forearm. On occasion, he would stand behind her, his chest gently pressed against her back. It was subtle, but she enjoyed it a great deal. He seemed content to just be near her, but when he held her, it was more than enough for both of them. There were days when this was the only physical contact she had with someone. Still, as time moved on, the contact became bolder.

The pale priestess cared about the stoic angel in return, of course. She did not think it was strange that he did not know he could and did return her feelings. Just because he did not know about an emotion or did not recognize it did not mean that it was not inside of him. She wished that they could be together like normal people and they would both be able to explore how they felt about each other.

“What’s to be done if you love me?” the angel inquired, as puzzled as ever. His hand drifted from her hair to her cheek briefly.

“What do you mean?” she countered, now a little confused herself. It seemed like an odd question to her and she was unsure how to answer.

“What do you do with this love?” he clarified himself.

“I feel it, Sesshomaru. It makes me appreciate that you’re around and it makes me to try to make you feel the same in return. It brings me happiness that I wish to bring you,” she answered, smiling at him as she spoke. He did not catch her meaning, though, and was still quite perplexed.

“But, I can’t feel the way that you can,” he pointed out; obviously mistaking what she meant by feeling. He was talking about physical while she meant emotional. Either way, he did not think that he could feel in the same manner as a human.

“Well, you could always fake it,” she commented dryly, making a joke.

Sesshomaru made a bemused face. Kikyo was happy that she did not joke very often because he did not get humor at all. She suspected it was not that angels did not find things funny, but jokes were just lost on Sesshomaru in particular. He made it a bit difficult to entertain him outside of a casual discussion much of the time. She did note he just seemed content to sit and hold her, which was what he did most of the time and how they ended up eventually this time as well while he allowed their discussion of love to fade away for the moment. He figured that she did not need to try to explain the whole thing that one time.

They ended up sitting underneath a tree. She was by his side and he put his arm around her. Slowly, she leaned against him, taking in his strong, solid form. It felt like everything was perfect and nothing could ever stop the perfection around them.

Sesshomaru liked being able to truly feel Kikyo. Well, it was truly for him anyway. They were in a dream, but it was the closest he would get to the real world. Besides, as far as Kikyo could tell, feeling in a dream was very close to real life, so she curled herself into him to appreciate the feel of him while she had the chance to do so. He was pleased with the fact that she snuggled into him as he held her.

The silver-haired male was still so very curious about the petite creature in his arms. He liked inspecting her, hoping to figure out why she appealed to him so much. He smelled her, noting that in the dream she carried no particular scent. In the real world, he could almost swear that he caught her fragrance, but it was very fleeting. So, he knew she smelled like something, but he was incapable of collecting the aroma. It frustrated him to be so limited when he wanted to know everything about the woman and he would not let her go until he did.

Sesshomaru leaned down and nuzzled her, causing Kikyo to whimper sweetly as he made contact. She figured by now she would be used to him touching her in such a way, but it was still such a surprise. A delightful surprise, though. She quickly relaxed from the closeness while he continued on with what he wanted to do. He licked at her neck, finding a hint of flavor there and he wanted more. He sucked at her pale flesh and she, having never felt such pleasure, cried out in ecstasy. Sesshomaru felt her pulse accelerating underneath his mouth.

For a moment, Kikyo just allowed the golden-eyed male free range over her. And then, his hands started to roam her petite form, causing her to moan. She managed to pull away from him, fearful of where they might end up with the way things were going, even if it was just a dream.

“Sesshomaru…” Kikyo said in an unsure tone. Her face was bewildered, her eyes wavering, even though she was looking at him.

“Forgive me,” Sesshomaru muttered, knowing that he was going too far. He was pleased that she halted him, lest he destroy them both.

“Sesshomaru… I would actually like to give myself to you,” she admitted, blushing as she spoke, even though she meant her words. She wanted to love him in every way.

“Excuse me?” he asked, failing to hide his disbelief to her statement. He appeared completely and utterly stunned by her statement. He actually considered he might not have heard right.

“I would like to give myself to you,” she repeated much more confidently that time. She would love nothing more than to express her love for him physically like any ordinary woman would do with an ordinary man. Unfortunately, they were not so ordinary.

“Kikyo, you do know that this is more than a dream while I am here, correct?”

She smiled. “That makes it easier for us.”

“It is not so simple. I’ve already broken so many rules to be with you, dragged you into this. If we were to go even further, the consequences could be dire.”

She pressed herself closer to him and he groaned. “I cannot see how our feelings for each other could lead to anything dire.”

“This is only another plane of existence, Kikyo. I’ve already touched you and that this was bad enough.”

“I still wish to give myself to you. I wish to show you how I feel. I want to express our feelings as any man and woman would and it would not have them be damned. Why should we?” she asked, leaning against him, feeling all of him. He groaned once more.

“What shall be done?” he inquired in a low voice.

“I don’t know. Don’t you have an idea?” she asked, studying his face. She wanted to lose herself in his eyes, his touch, and be with him forever. _How has he made me feel this way?_ It was not really a mystery. He was there when no one else.

“I know what I want and I know what you now want,” he stated. He wanted to know her, understand her, and figure out why she consumed him.

“Is such a thing possible?” she asked quietly, looking around. This was a dream, after all. Could they ever have such a relationship in a dream?

Sesshomaru sighed. He should tell her the truth, the whole truth. Perhaps she would do the wise thing and reject him. She just might be the logical and smart one out of the two of them, he considered. They would be safe if she was to push him away, even though he would hate that. He wanted the dangerous thing, the wrong thing. As it turned out, it was the same thing that she wanted, even after he explained everything to her. _Consequences be damned_ , he whispered in his head as she granted his desire, her desire.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru thought once would be enough. He thought he would not have to bother with Kikyo after having her once. After all, he believed that all he held for her was curiosity and lust. The only problem was that neither of those feelings were sated after having her once. He still longed to be near her, to hear her voice, to interact with her beyond her dreams. He wondered what it would be like to sleep next to her. He did not even sleep. He just wanted to know how it would feel. It was almost like he was infected with Kikyo, like she had invaded every part of him and made a permanent camp everywhere.

One day, just to frustrate himself, Sesshomaru lay down next to the raven-haired priestess on her pallet before entering her dream. She turned in her sleep to face him as soon as he was next to her. She even reached to the space that he would have occupied if only he had a solid form. She whined a little when she did not feel anything in that area and it felt like the noise vibrated through him. He groaned and tried hard to imagine her actually touching him. He tried to imagine her small, gentle hand caressing his body, but he could not do it. He was willing to bet that her touch was glorious, even more so than in the dream world.

Oh, how he needed to feel her one day soon or he would go stark, raving mad. He was certain of that and then he sank into her dreams. The odd thing was that in her dream, he showed up in the same place that he had been in while in the real world.

“What are you dreaming about?” Sesshomaru inquired as he took in his surroundings. He thought it was a bit strange for him to be lying in the same space that he had been in the real world. It was a little jarring and for a moment, he feared he did something wrong. Maybe he ripped the fabric of reality.

“I thought that you were next to me for some reason and the dream suddenly shifted to this,” Kikyo answered. It would be quite a thing to be able to sleep next to him, to wake up next to him. Just thinking he was there had filled her with immense joy to the point where she began dreaming about it immediately.

“I was.”

“And you are,” she pointed out.

Kikyo moved over to where she was resting on the platinum-haired angel. Sesshomaru wrapped his strong arms around her and reveled in the feel of her. _Is it so wrong to want to be with her forever and always?_ He knew now, just from having her pressed against him, he would never get enough of her. His curiosity would never be satisfied. He would always require her and he did not understand what was so wrong with that, aside from the fact that he was not supposed to desire anything at all, especially in the human world, and especially a human woman.

It was not like Sesshomaru would ever allow anything to happen to her. He would never harm Kikyo in any way. She would not harm him. Why could he not just have her and that be that? Why did there have to be rules and consequences when nothing seemed wrong with what was happening?

Kikyo was aware of the conflict that her lover was going through and she softly stroked his arm, hoping to keep him calm. She knew he had little idea as to what was going on inside of him. All he knew was that he was doing something that was considered a sin. She knew that for herself as well, but she knew something more. She had done more than given herself to an angel, but to a man point blank that she was not married to. Their sins seemed to mount with each time that they were around each other, but they did not mind. They could not mind. They needed each other too much to think of anything else.

There was also the fact Sesshomaru had taught Kikyo some arts that were forbidden to humans. He could not help himself. He figured he should give her more gifts than just himself while they were damning themselves. He was not sure why he felt that way, but he did those things because she was precious to him and he wanted her to be able to take care of herself since he could not. He needed to protect her in any way that he could, even if it meant teaching her things he should not.

“You are the loveliest creature in all of this divine creation,” Sesshomaru whispered to the woman in his arms. He moved her onto his chest to where she was resting right on top of him. Reaching up, he caressed her cheek.

“I would say the same of you,” she replied.

Sesshomaru sat up somewhat and kissed Kikyo on the lips with as much passion as he could muster. She melted into him like she always did while noting that his mouth was dully sweet. He made her moan with his tender, loving embrace.

To him, Kikyo was actually the angel. He had seen many things in his very long life, but nothing ever affected him like the sight of her. It was like a curse to not be able to truly be with her, but it was a sin to be with her. It was a curse to be apart because it was pain; it was agony in every sense of the word. And, of course, it was a sin to be together because it was pleasure. Was it so wrong to be so fulfilled and satisfied?

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Apparently, it is so wrong for the couple to be so fulfilled and satisfied because they end up being punished for it. What will their punishments be?


	3. Is it a crime?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

3: Is it a crime?

Kikyo sat comfortably against a thick tree that was a few feet from the stream near her house. It was late in the afternoon, but Kikyo had finished her rounds in the village early, so she had the time to spare. She was thankful for that time because it gave her time with a certain angel on a very lovely day.

She read out loud from a book of poems that she had lying around her house. Sesshomaru sat next to her and she could sense him there, but he was not the reason she was reading out loud. Sesshomaru had one of his hands around her shoulders and another was resting on her abdomen. He wished she could physically feel his touch against her. He was certain physically feeling him would be much more reassuring than just sensing him.

“I’m here,” he said. His words whispered across her cheek.

Kikyo’s stomach fluttered. She would have liked to feel Sesshomaru against her as he was right now. It would have been quite comforting to her nerves, which she did a good job in hiding. She could guess how Sesshomaru sat next to her, even though she could not actually feel him. He made it a habit to sit as he was when he manifested himself in her dreams lately. He enjoyed touching her stomach now and she did not mind the attention, but it made her think quite often. She pondered it for just a few moments, usually when she was alone.

The ebony-haired miko did not think about it because she regretted being with Sesshomaru or was remorseful for what they had done. No, those thoughts never even entered her mind. She just wondered about what she would do, what _they_ would do. After all, he was an intangible entity. While they both had done the deed, it would mostly be on her to take care of things because he simply could not. So, what was she to do? She did not know beyond the fact that she would continue on. She believed things would come to her in at proper time.

Sesshomaru now felt two emotions at once while being with his darling Kikyo. He felt sorrow and elation. He was not sure if those were the exact names of the emotions, but from his understanding of things, he felt sorrow and elation and it made sense to him. He was happy to finally be able to be with her in some manner, to get to know her, and to have her accept him, to love him. But, now that he had all of that, he considered the consequences of their actions. He wished now they had not held the philosophy of “consequences be damned” before. He wished he had been the wiser being back then.

The angel was very aware he had put Kikyo in a terrible position, even though she would argue she knew just what she was getting into from the moment that he explained everything to her. She told him that they would manage and if push came to shove, she would manage. When she showed such courage, he could only promise to not leave her alone for longer than necessary to manage on her own. She accepted that with a small smile. His feelings for her doubled in that moment.

Sesshomaru did not understand the protective feeling that was building inside of him. He had never felt that way before because he did not have anything to protect before he met the petite human near him. His job never entailed protecting something or someone. He merely accepted the feeling without questioning it. Anything that involved Kikyo, he had come to just accept it because he already had so much to be curious about when it came to her. So, it was less consuming to just accept things. Besides, he would rather just enjoy being with her than wasting his time wondering about feelings that she ignited within him.

The platinum-haired angel wished that he could move her ebony hair to the side and kiss her creamy neck. He was not sure why he always desired to touch her, except for the fact that he knew that he wanted her to know that he was there. He wanted her to know that she was safe with him. He said such words to her before while admitting he did not understand why he felt as he did and she tried to explain affection to him, but he did not totally grasp the concept that he was clearly feeling. He just knew he wanted to touch her, relax her, and be with her for some reason, which was good enough for him.

The good thing about being an angel, Sesshomaru guessed anyway, was that reasons were not a driving force for them and he was included in that. They did not really require reasons for actions because of the way that they were made. Angels were created to follow orders without questions and most of the time without being given explanations. Who knew why they did anything and they hardly ever cared to know. Any angel that did suddenly need reasons quickly found himself unemployed and typically a demon before long.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru was with Kagura. They were in the clouds again, lounging because they did not have anything better to do with themselves. He was waiting for her to say something, but for once, it seemed that she did not have anything to say. She glanced at him continuously, though. It seemed like she wanted to say something, but dared not to open her mouth.

“What?” he sighed in an irked tone. She was getting on his nerves; yes, angels could be annoyed. He wanted her to just say whatever was on her mind rather than continuously glancing over at him as if she did not know what to make of him.

“It just baffles the hell out of me that you can do this. Don’t you give a damn?” she asked in an almost exhausted voice. She seemed a bit worked up over something that he did not think even concerned her.

“I suppose,” he answered casually with a bit of a shrug.

“Then how the hell can you do this?” she begged, face desperate for reasons, her hands out as if to catch his response. _What the hell is driving him_ , she wondered. What the hell was making him do what he was doing? What the hell was on his mind?! She could not figure it out and he never helped because he gave her such clipped answers.

“I had to,” he answered as if that was the most logical response to give. He just had to be with Kikyo and it was that simple. She was more important than anything that he could think of. She was more fulfilling than his work and he doubted he would be able to go on without being with her. So, he had to be with her, every way that he could and in any way that he could.

“You’re going to fry for this,” the ruby-eyed female pointed out, throwing her hands up. It seemed like she was in a panic over him and Sesshomaru picked up on that.

He waved her off. “Don’t worry about me, Kagura.”

“I’m not,” she huffed with deep indignation, as if he had managed to offend her. she folded her arms across her chest. _Like I would worry about such a pompous, self-righteous idiot and his stupid human_ , she thought. She even sounded upset in her own head. She had better things to do with her time than to worry about a jerk like Sesshomaru. Actually, she did not have anything better to do, but she would never admit that out loud.

“Good,” the golden-eyed male said with no feeling in his tone whatsoever.

Sesshomaru could not figure out why Kagura was so worked up over what he was doing. It was not like she would get in trouble with him. He wondered if she was actually concerned about Kikyo. Kagura was close to humans thanks to her job, so she could always be directing her worry in the wrong direction since she could not be by Kikyo’s side, but he would never know because he would never ask.

Kagura actually did not know why she was hyped over his actions. As angels, they had no concept of loneliness, but underneath it all, Kagura was so panicked about his actions for that very reason. If he was gone, if he fell, she would be alone for the most part. She would not have anyone to annoy if he was gone. Well, there were others, but she liked being around him and getting on his nerves. She was close to him, even if they would never admit it. She just did not know that she would feel alone because she was so limited as an angel.

The celestial pair was silent for a long while before Sesshomaru had to leave. It was for his work for once and not to be with Kikyo. Almost as soon as he left, Naraku appeared. Kagura frowned immediately. Due to her occupation, it was impossible for her to like Naraku. She understood he had his job to do just as she had hers, but she could not like him because of their jobs. She was supposed to protect humans while his job seemed to be to torment humans, sometimes it even seemed as if he was meant to destroy humans. He would argue he tested humans. It was just that he never believed nor wanted the human to pass the test.

Naraku was an adversary angel. He came into play to test the faith or heart of humans for whatever reasons. Sometimes, it seemed he only tested humans because he wanted to put them through horrible trials and to watch them suffer. Kagura did not understand how he got permission from the higher-ups sometimes to do the things that he desired to do, especially to humans that did not seem to deserve such exhausting, will-breaking tests. She could not take such things since her job was to try and minimize human suffering, when she felt like it anyway. She would never think to do the things that Naraku did and seemed to get enjoyment out of.

It was also odd to Kagura that Naraku seemed to like his tasks. It was not very bizarre for an angel to like his job, but many angels just did what they did because that was their assignments. She thought it was peculiar that he seemed to delight in causing human suffering.

“Naraku, what are you doing here?” Kagura practically demanded, glaring at him. She hated having to see him and be near him. She felt like he was somehow poisoning her just by being nearby.

“Only my job,” the adversary angel replied in his bored tone of speaking, as if he was better than everything else in all of creation. In that way, he reminded her of Sesshomaru, but Sesshomaru was nowhere near as condescending as Naraku.

“And you waited until Sesshomaru left to do it?” she inquired with a craned eyebrow. She did not sound like she was making fun of him, but there was glint in her ruby eyes that gave her away.

“What are you implying?” he inquired with a frown.

“Nothing,” Kagura answered with an almost innocent face. It was helped by the fact that she had a halo.

“Point out his wench to me,” Naraku commanded like he was her boss.

“I don’t think so,” she replied with playful defiance, wagging her finger at him. She seriously had no intention of doing what he wanted. She was not about to help him ruin a human who as far as she could tell was still pure. She still did not see any blemishes on the woman’s soul whenever she looked at her, so she did not see any reason for Naraku to be present.

“Do it now,” he ordered in a harsh tone, pointing a threatening finger back at her. It sounded like if he could cause Kagura pain, he would be doing it at that very moment.

Kagura frowned, being the lowest form of angel certainly had its drawbacks, like being ordered around by almost every other level of angel there was. Like the jerk also known as Naraku. She still would not comply because she truly disliked him.

Naraku scowled deeply, angry with Kagura and her well-known rebellious attitude. He peered over the cloud to search for himself. He scanned the area below them for the little sinful human. He found her tending to an old woman. He chuckled a bit when he caught sight of her.

“So, that’s the human. She doesn’t look like much,” Naraku commented as if his opinion was the highest authority in the land and he clearly disapproved of Kikyo.

“She’s the purest human I’ve ever seen at her age,” Kagura countered to defend Kikyo. She was not sure why she was coming to the human’s defense, but she did not need a why; it was a perk of being an angel.

“She isn’t so pure. She has lain with a celestial entity. Kagura, you shall be the witness as I bring the counts against this human, judge her, and pronounce sentence,” he stated, giving her commands once again, much to her annoyance.

“Whatever,” the female angel replied, folding her arms across her chest. She did not have a choice in the matter. He needed a witness that he had done his job and she was there already without any plans to leave, so she might as well be the witness. She did make sure to look exceptionally cross with having to stay and observe such a spectacle, though. He did not seem to care about her expression as long as she did as she was told.

Naraku started as soon as he could tell Kagura was not going to open her mouth again. “The counts are as follows, charge one: lying with a high-ranking celestial entity. Charge two: learning forbidden crafts from a high-ranking celestial entity. Charge three: carrying the child of a high-ranking celestial entity. She is obviously guilty of all counts—” he was cut off from finishing his task.

“Whoa, wait, no one is going to arrive to defend her?” Kagura inquired in disbelief. Was that not against protocol?

Usually, an angel came to defend the human being that was being charged, even if the human was obviously guilty, which Kikyo was. There was supposed to be someone to justify Kikyo’s actions or at least try to bargain down her sentence. There was supposed to be someone to help this woman. Kagura wanted to know what was going.

“Why is there suddenly a change in the norm?” Kagura pressed.

“No one would touch this case. She is much too guilty and it would be a waste of time for anyone to come defend her. No one wants to risk getting tainted with this sin, especially when they found out she was pregnant. They’re all busy defending people that they believe can be saved, redeemed. She is filthy. She is guilty as charged. Her punishment is to be tested with isolation until she acknowledges and renounces her depraved sins. Also, should her child be permitted to live then she must prove that her child’s life means more to her than her own,” Naraku announced.

“How can she acknowledge and renounce her sins if she isn’t even aware—” Kagura tried to argue, but the adversary angel did not allow her to make it through her statement. How could that woman do anything if she did not even know that she was being punished? It was not fair.

“I have passed judgment. So shall it be,” Naraku declared, holding up his hand a little.

Most people would expect thunder and lightning or something big and flashy to accompany Naraku’s edict, but Kagura knew better. She had seen enough judgments in her existence to know that it was silent. The humans never knew what hit them.

Every now and then, a human came to believe he was cursed when, in fact, he had been judged. A curse was the closest that a human ever came to knowing that they had been judged. A few of them lucked up and guessed that they had done something very wrong and repented and such, but almost no one ever pinpointed their exact charge, or charges in Kikyo’s case. Kagura doubted Kikyo would be the exception to the rule, no matter how extraordinary Sesshomaru swore the woman was.

Kagura and Naraku continued to observe Kikyo after he passed judgment on her. She would have preferred that he left after he had done his job, but it would seem that was too much to ask. She would just have to endure him for the moment. _If only his mere presence didn’t piss me off so much, this would be a lot easier_ , she commented in her mind. She decided to just focus on the petite priestess whose life Naraku more than likely just ruined for all eternity.

As Kagura knew, Kikyo did not even seem to notice that anything significant happened to her. The woman went about her usual duties about the village and caring for the people as well as tending the shrine that was at the edge of the town. She seemed to think that her life was still normal, but the guardian angel doubted life would ever be normal again for Kikyo.

Kagura noted that despite the sins, the judgment, and of course, the possible malevolent creature that was growing in her womb, Kikyo’s aura was still as pure as a human could get. Her soul was still clean despite everything. It baffled the guardian angel because she swore that sins were supposed to taint human souls. That was what sins did, after all. How could Kikyo have sinned and it had not soiled her aura? Kagura just did not understand it.

 _How in the hell is it possible to sin and remain pure_ , Kagura pondered. It was impossible as far as she knew. The whole thing with sinning was that it tainted the human soul. Kikyo had sinned, so she should be tainted, yet she was not. It did not make any sense at all.

“I thought I smelled a foul stench,” Sesshomaru commented as he appeared behind Naraku and Kagura. The pair jumped.

“Ah, the uppity dog of a cherubim, Sesshomaru,” Naraku retorted coolly as he recovered.

“You’re both self-righteous pricks,” Kagura pointed out. _At least Sesshomaru a self-righteous prick most people can stand_.

“You can guess why I’m here, can’t you, oh mighty Sesshomaru?” Naraku inquired with a half smirk on his face, taunting the silver-haired angel. He was practically boasting with his eyes because he felt like he had gotten the better of the golden-eyed cherub.

“What did you do to Kikyo?” Sesshomaru demanded, feeling a spark of anger for the first time in his very long existence. He did not bother to contemplate the emotion coursing through him like a blazing inferno threatening to rage out of control already. He just knew he desired to rip Naraku apart for only doing his job. _What has happened to me? More importantly, what has happened to Kikyo?_

“I have judged the sinful wench. She shall be punished with hardship of the heart and soul. She will suffer the pains of human loneliness. She will be a pariah,” Naraku proclaimed, as if he was proud of what he had done. He dared to smirk while he spoke.

“Until?” Sesshomaru inquired with a growl in his throat.

Naraku continued to smirk as he answered that question. “Until she acknowledges and renounces her sins.”

“She will never do such a thing,” Sesshomaru pointed out as if the other male angel would care and then suddenly reverse his judgment. Kikyo was not the type of person to renounce doing something because she always did what she felt was the right thing or the best thing, behaving as such minimized the regrets in her life. The golden-eyed angel knew for a fact that Kikyo would never do what Naraku suggested.

“Then she will always suffer, as she should for doing such things,” Naraku countered, still seeming so smug over what he had done to Kikyo.

Sesshomaru felt his fury expand; it was like a solar storm centralized in his being. The feeling was so new to him and he desired nothing more than to cut down an immortal for the fate of a mortal. It was completely irrational, but that did not even enter his mind. He growled deep in his throat. It was actually a sound that was familiar to Kagura because she dealt closely with humans. She was accustomed to the sounds that humans made because of the emotions that they were feeling, like laughter, crying, and snarling; sounds that angels were never supposed to make.

“Sesshomaru, you knew this was coming,” Kagura pointed out to calm him down. It was at that point she was certain of what was going to happen with Sesshomaru. He was going to have to go down with that woman. Not only had he sinned, but he had changed. He was different from the way he was before he had noticed that woman. He was not even an angel anymore from what she could tell.

“Indeed,” Sesshomaru confirmed, his anger finally cooling down and abandoning him because Kagura spoke the truth.

The platinum-haired cherub knew that Naraku or some other adversary of humans would come and judge his precious treasure. Kikyo had sinned; there was just no getting around that. He had sinned, too, perhaps much worse than she had because he could have stayed away from her. He believed he had tempted her, too, even though some angels might argue she had tempted him just because she carried herself. There were a few angels that actually believed that human women tempted them just by existing and not covering themselves from head to toe, somewhat flaunting themselves by being alive. It was not a popular view.

“So, Naraku, why don’t you get going?” Kagura suggested in a dismissive tone with a curl to her lip. She wanted him gone as soon as possible, if not sooner than that. There was something about him that was just not very angelic and it made her uncomfortable.

“No, not yet. What charges did you bring upon Kikyo?” Sesshomaru demanded, glaring at Naraku.

“I can’t reveal those to you,” Naraku replied.

“Tell me,” the platinum-haired angel ordered in a threatening tone. _Maybe I can redeem her, save her_ , he thought. She did not deserve to be cast out of the light. He believed she was brightness embodied, she was light, and so she did not deserve to be marked because of him.

“I won’t. You don’t have any power over me, Sesshomaru. You’re nothing now. You would be cast out for a creature made of clay and dirt when we are pure light? You are so very foolish,” Naraku declared haughtily, tilting his chin up.

“Am I? Why exist to just be made of pure light and nothing more? So, I shall be cast out,” Sesshomaru replied nonchalantly, waving it off. He had little desire to remain where he was because he just wanted to be with the woman that was his angel, the woman who was his light. He no longer wanted to live to do his work. He wanted to live to be with her and with their offspring. _So, this is the will that so many angels fought against_ , he silently noted. _It is not so terrible. It is light if it is her_. He liked that he wanted to be with Kikyo and their unborn child.

“Of course you are to be cast out, sinner,” Naraku stated, smirking ever so slightly. He sounded like he was enjoying himself that day, feeding off of everyone else’s misery. It gave him a wonderful chance of trying to come off as better than everyone and thing in existence.

“And who shall do this? You?” Sesshomaru inquired indifferently, not even bothering to look at Naraku anymore. His eyes seemed to look through his present company. He doubted Naraku would be the one to cast him out since he was of a higher rank in the celestial order than Naraku was.

“No, that is not my place,” Naraku reluctantly admitted, shaking his head. He looked away as he spoke, as if it pained him to recall that the other male angel out ranked him.

Sesshomaru nodded. He just wanted to remind Naraku that no matter what, he was above the adversary while he was still a celestial entity. Naraku judged humans. Sesshomaru would be punished by those of a higher rank than he was. So, either a seraph or a Heaven-bound cherub would judge him. He would become Fallen sometime soon. He was more than aware of that and had been for a long time. He did not care because there were advantages to being Fallen and he looked forward to those.

Once he was cast out of the heavens, Sesshomaru would be free to seek out his beloved without having to worry about it being a sin or consequences being brought against them. They would be able to be together with their offspring. Well, he would be able to do that unless he was thrown into an abyss. He would try for all eternity to escape to her, though, and leaving the place of punishment was a serious offense. He just did not care.

If when Sesshomaru was cast out and he was thrown to the humans’ Garden, then that would be the ideal situation for him. He would be free to find Kikyo and he would find her. There was no mistaking that in his mind. He would be able to touch her and truly feel her since he would be an earthy creature from than on rather than a celestial being. He would be able to be by her side physically as his child grew within her. He would be able to experience passion truly without his angelic nature scratching at the depths of his mind all of the time. He would be able to provide her and their child with everything that they could want or need. He would be able to enjoy Kikyo and please her without any consequences as they were already punished. They would just be a damned couple. Being damned never sounded so good.

Sesshomaru was judged hours after Kikyo was. He had gone off on an assignment and right after he finished doing his task, he was confronted by a column of bright light – a seraph. Apparently, the seraph was a showoff and did not want to reveal himself even to a cherub, so the higher angel remained hidden in the blinding light while passing judgment over the golden-eyed cherubim. Sesshomaru was informed of his sins, as if he did not know what they were.

The silver-haired angel was condemned for his actions with the human priestess, which he expected. He was condemned for corrupting the earthy realm with his celestial presence in a manner that he was not assigned to do. He was condemned for creating a life within that priestess, which he knew was a rather horrible charge in the eyes of the heavens. He was then charged with committing the worst sin an angel could possible commit, acting on his own, acting of his own accord. He was banished from the Heavens for such terrible acts. There was a thunderclap and Sesshomaru was gone.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Sesshomaru has fallen and Kikyo is all alone. What will they do?


	4. King of Sorrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

4: King of Sorrow

Kikyo sat up late at night with her hand on her stomach and her back against the sturdy wooden wall of her one room house. She was in her bed, but she did not feel like lying down because she had no desire for sleep at the moment. She was too worried to sleep right now.

The chocolate-eyed beauty stared out of the window at the bright full moon that was illuminating the night sky, the light invading her little living space, which she did not mind in the slightest. The celestial body reminded her of Sesshomaru’s hair, shining in an ethereal, practically heavenly manner. She had not seen him for days now, which was odd for him. He came around almost daily since he figured out he could be with her in her dreams. She should lament that fact that he seemed to be missing, she told herself, but she tried to hold onto hope instead.

Sesshomaru was gone more than likely since he had not come around and she admitted that much to herself. Punished for being with her, punished for finding solace in her arms, punished for showing her so many things that she lacked. He warned her the day would come. It more than likely had and it was the most likely reason for his absence. _I am the reason he’s gone_.

“What will we do now?” she wondered aloud, absently rubbing her abdomen.

Kikyo was not sure of the answer to her question. The uncertainty of the future, trying to weigh down on her like a large boulder was the reason that she would rather hold onto hope than to grieve. If he came back, she had faith everything would be all right. She had no doubt she would be able to manage on her own, as she had done so most of her life. But, ever since he showed up, she would rather _not_ have to do things by herself. She wanted him by her side.

“I want him here with me… with us,” she muttered, glancing out of the window once more.

 _Where is Sesshomaru?_ He spoke a few times of being banished from the Heavens for doing what they had done, for being with her. He told her that he would become a demon once that happened. She had asked if all demons were fallen angels, worried that the demons she fought might have been lost souls seeking love. He assured all demons were not, but all fallen angels were demons and it was unlikely she fought against anyone who had been seeking something virtuous when they came up against her. He would fall and he would become a demon. He just did not know when.

Sesshomaru never did say where fallen angels went after being banished, but he had once informed her that the first angel to know a human female had been cast into a deep abyss, unable to escape. _What if he’s now there? What if he’ll never be able to escape and return to me?_ She tried not to think along those lines, even though she knew that it was very plausible.

She decided to just cling to the hope that nothing happened to Sesshomaru despite the fact that she had not seen or sensed him for several days now. _It’s only been a few days. Hardly with being alarmed over. It is possible he just lost track of time since the concept is beyond him_. He had once said that everything ran together with him, even the rising and setting of the sun held little meaning to him. He hardly noticed those things before meeting her. Almost everything that humans took for granted or seemed to think were givens were beyond Sesshomaru’s comprehension. So, it was possible that he had just lost track of time or had something to do that took up a lot of time.

“Sesshomaru…” Kikyo whispered into the cool, still night, hoping he knew she was waiting for him. “We’re waiting for you.” Her hand rubbed her belly once more.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru’s golden eyes flickered open instantly and he groaned, feeling a strange sensation in his head. He felt dizzy for the first time in his existence. He felt confused, too, almost like he did not know what anything was at all. He looked around and recognized he was in a forest. _Well, that’s good first step_ , he supposed. _If nothing else, it proves I’m not some idiot_. Now for the difficult things, like who was he and how did he get into the woods in the first place?

For a moment, the pale male just laid where he was, feeling the rough dirt and grass caressing his back. A slightly chilling breeze blew by, moving his hair and ticking his skin. The air smelled of something that he could not quite place, which he was not sure why. His mind did not seem to register anything he was currently experiencing and he did not even notice that at first.

Sesshomaru stood up, climbing up to a graceful, impressive height. He felt woozy and he nearly fell over, but he caught himself against a broad tree. For a second, he rubbed his fingers against the bark. It felt rough. _Rough? What is that? Perhaps I am some sort of idiot._

He put his hand up to his forehead as if that would help him balance his body better than he was doing at the moment. He felt sick and he somehow knew it was a new sensation for him, even though he could not recall who he was. _Why do he feel sick?_ _Why have I never felt sick before? What is sick?_ He growled in frustration because he could not remember anything. Well, he could not remember anything significant.

He closed his hands into fists and nearly jumped in surprise as he realized something important finally. He could feel his palms for the very first time in his life. He was aware that it was a first time for some reason, even though he could not recollect anything “important.” Feeling his hands for the first time did not ring high on his priority list at the moment due to the fact that it did not him who he was, where he came from, or how he got to where he was right now.

 _But, feeling is a little fascinating_ , he silently admitted. It was a strange sensation and he wondered if he had felt something before that his palms and that tree bark. It seemed slightly familiar, but he could not recall if he had ever felt something before. He rubbed his fingertips across his palm, hoping something would come to him, but no memories surfaced.

Sesshomaru decided to examine himself after realizing that he had just felt his own hands for the first time. His body seemed to intrigue him like it might intrigue a newborn baby. His eyes seemed to fall automatically to the easiest thing that he could gaze upon on himself, his hands. He stared at his hands almost as if he did not know what they were and noticed he had long nails, possibly claws. He was not sure if he had always had claws or not. He wondered what the purpose of the talons was and had he used them before if they had always been there. Something inside of him pointed out that it did not matter if he had or had not had them before. He took the inner voice’s word on that and moved on with his inspection.

He came to his cream-colored wrists and noticed that he had fuchsia bands across his wrists. He was not sure if he had had the marks before. He looked down at his whole body to see if he had any more natural, colored tattoos. He discovered that he was nude by that time and some part of him whispered that he should be ashamed. A louder voice that made more sense in his head told him that nothing could possibly shame someone as magnificent as he was. He concurred with that latter voice.

Once Sesshomaru was done with his semi-intense examination of his body, which he found to be near-divine, he looked around his surrounding. There were trees and bushes as far as his eyes could see, but nothing looked familiar to him. He had a nagging feeling that he was not some place that he belonged. He needed to get somewhere else, his brain ordered him almost immediately now. He did not know where he had to get, but he might as well get moving because standing there would not do him any good.

Sesshomaru took shaky steps on numb, weak legs in the direction he faced. He could hear all sorts of noises, but he ignored everything. _Hearing isn’t a very fascinating sensation_ , he noted. It might have had something to do with the fact that he could not choose what he wanted to hear like he could pick what he wished to feel. Or maybe it was just because he was not hearing something that he desired to hear yet. _Is this my first time hearing, though?_ It did not entirely feel like it was his first time hearing, so maybe that was why it was not very fascinating.

He could also smell all sorts of things, but it was equally as uninteresting as hearing, even though he knew that he was not familiar with the sense of smell. There was just nothing worthwhile to catch the scent of in his opinion and he also could not choose what he desired to smell either. There were just all sorts of things from the woods assaulting his naïve nose and his brain could not make order of any of it, so he tried his best to ignore the attack. The sensation that continued to garner all of his attention was touch. There was a sense that was far from mundane in his opinion.

He stumbled across a small stream and a strange thought overcame him as another new sensation rushed his body. _I should take a drink_ , he figured. He did not even know what it meant to drink or why it was even done, but he suddenly knew he had to have a drink. He cupped his hand and gathered some of the cool, clean water in his palm. He hesitantly put the water to his lips and sipped it. He found the crisp liquid soothing and satisfying as it slid gently down his throat. He glanced down into the water and for the first time ever, he saw himself. Jumping, he blinked a few times before he realized the person looking back at him was him. _Is this magic?_ He peered into the water, trying to understand what he was looking at.

Sesshomaru raised his hand and watched the image do the same. Giving a few more movements, he watched as the image did the same. _This is me?_ Having a mirror image was a totally new concept to him. He was completely captivated by his reflection; once he realized that it was his image staring back him anyway. He never knew what he looked like and he had never cared to know either. He was an intriguing sight.

He had a pair of mulberry purple slash marks on each very pale cheek. He lightly traced each one with his right hand as if he was curious of how those marks got on his face. Then there was a indigo crescent moon on his pale forehead, which he traced also with the same childlike fascination that he studied the rest of his body with. _Have I always had these?_ He did not have an answer for himself.

He brushed his silver bangs aside to see his entire blue crescent moon. He then noticed his golden eyes. They were strange eyes, as if he had seen things, billions upon billions of things, but they did not matter to him at all, not when he had seen them anyway. He wondered what it was that he might have seen, how many things he might have seen, and why they had not mattered to him when he witnessed them. _Why can’t I remember anything?_ He could not even recall his name, yet he knew that he had one.

Another name seemed to echo through his mind in place of his own, but even that name escaped his grasp. He was not sure what his brain was attempting to tell him, but he figured it would come to him soon enough. He could not remain a blank sheet for long… right? He had faith in himself to remember everything that he needed to remember.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo continued to wait for Sesshomaru’s return and her womb grew ever larger with the fruit of a celestial being. Part of her had not believed that being with Sesshomaru in a dream would lead to her current situation. It was just a dream, after all. But, he had explained several times that the dream world was very close to reality when an angel was involved and crazy things happened when angels got involved in dreams. She did not understand how it was physically possible for her to be with a child after only coupling with Sesshomaru in her dreams. He had never physically touched her, could not physically touch her. He never had a body to touch her.

“I thought I understood his explanation, but I suppose I did not,” she conceded. She sat by the stream. The weather was changing, the days getting shorter and colder. She did her best to not let the weather affect her moods.

She did not regret her time with Sesshomaru in any way, nor did she feel any remorse for her actions. She held no resentment toward the beautiful life growing inside of her. She only wanted Sesshomaru by her side, so they could live their lives.

She supposed that many people would consider her actions to be wrong, maybe even irresponsible. It was one thing for her to be who she was and to lay with a man, but to have been with an angel had to seem borderline blasphemous. But, it had been her choice and it had been his choice. She would not take it back now if she could and she hoped that it was the same with him.

“I loved him then and I love him now. How could I ever take back such a thing?”

They had not harmed anyone, only brought some meaning to the other’s existence. It felt inexplicably delightful to know that someone cared for her, to know that _he_ cared for her. She was certain he reveled in the fact that she returned his feelings, even if he did not totally understand what was going on between them emotionally. They had only helped each other as far as she could tell, but she could not help thinking that maybe their sins were wrong.

“If he is being punished for what we did, then someone certainly thinks what we did was wrong,” she muttered, watching the sun disappear behind the tree line. It would be dark soon.

If Sesshomaru fell, then maybe they had sinned and it was wrong. She had possibly gotten him not only thrown out of Heaven, but also sent to some accursed abyss. He could be suffering for all eternity because of her. She frowned and her stomach twisted slightly, causing her to put her hand to her belly. A dull ache spread through her body whenever she thought about how he could be in distress because he was with her. _She_ could be the reason that her beloved was in pure misery, so she tried not to think about that if she could help it.

“I don’t understand why he would be punished, though. How is it a crime to love someone?” she wondered.

She did not see why it was so wrong for Sesshomaru to be with her. She could not figure out why it was a sin in the first place for them to be together. It was one of the things Sesshomaru had never gotten around to explaining and it was probably because he was not too sure why it was so wrong either. He just pointed out that they were from two different worlds, which she could understand, but that seemed to be the only thing that they could gather that was wrong with them being together. They both had things that they were supposed to do and being together just was not on the list.

“If love is a virtue, why should he be punished for it? No, he didn’t know what it was, but he felt it,” Kikyo said, pushing herself to her feet. The sun was gone and night had surrounded her.

Once in her home, she made herself a simple meal, something to help settle the baby for the night. The priestess then parked up against the wall, sitting next to her bed, a simple pallet. The house was covered in the shadows of the night. She should go to sleep, if only for the baby, but sleep never came easy anymore, not since Sesshomaru vanished from her life. She placed her hand on her abdomen; there was a noticeable bulge there now. In a few months, it would be large enough for anyone to see. She did not think about that at the moment, even though it had entered her mind several times before. She was just thinking of their baby now.

She was already certain that they were going to have a beautiful baby. She was not sure if they were having a girl or a boy and she did not care about that. She just knew their child would be wonderful and despite the fact that she did not know what the future held. She knew she loved their child with all of her heart already. She wanted the best for the baby, which included having Sesshomaru around. She wanted the angel to come back to be with her and their offspring.

“You know, I never met my father,” Kikyo informed the growing baby in a low, gentle tone. “He was killed by bandits while my mother was still carrying me. She used to tell me about him very often, but I doubt it’s the same as having the man there. To hear about your father just can’t be the same as being with your father. I don’t want that for you. Your brain fills in gaps that your mother leaves out and sometimes the gaps make no sense and you don’t know what to do. I want you to know your father, so I hope that he makes his way to us wherever he is. I’ll keep you safe and protect you while we wait.”

Kikyo could not believe the predicament that she was in. She was carrying a child that was half-angel. She wondered if that was anything like carrying the offspring of a demon. She knew something about half-demons, of course. She knew they were difficult on human women, who, while being built for labor, were not built for birthing a baby with demon blood. A child with demon blood and ready to enter the world was known to claw its way out a good deal of the time. Children with demon blood were also notorious for coming whenever they felt like it, trimesters be damned. While a human tended to have a gestation period of about nine months, demons could go longer or shorter. They seemed to just show up whenever they got bored with floating, some were impatient while others were lazy.

She gasped. “How long will you be in there?”

Kikyo just realized that if her baby was anything like a child with demon blood, she could be pregnant for a whole year. Or worse, she could wake up tomorrow and appear ready to burst. _I will have to prepare for you very soon_. The last thing she needed was for her baby to decide that being in her womb was tedious only after being there for a couple of months and she was not ready for such a thing. She needed to be ready, but she hoped that the child gave her some time.

“Do your mother a favor and stay in there for just a few months,” the miko said to the lump in her abdomen. She felt that as long as she had time, she would be able to make a comfortable life for her baby. She hoped that Sesshomaru returned to them also. She knew how badly he wanted to be there with their child.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru sat in the forest that he had woken up in, his bare back against the rough bark of a tree. He was not sure how long he had been there. Time was still a very lost concept to him. He had noticed it get light and then dark, but that also meant nothing to him. He hardly understood why it became light and then dark and then light already again, but then he noticed the sun and it all came together. Time really did not concern him since he had much more pressing issues on his mind.

The fallen angel, now a demon since he was physically earth-bound, still could not recall anything at all. He did not even know he was a fallen angel or a demon. He could not remember that he was an angel at one point in time. He just knew that he was a pale, nude male in the middle of the woods. He did not know how he had gotten where he was, why he was naked, or anything else that might have been important. He tried his best to recall something, anything, but his mind remained just as blank as the first time when he opened his amber eyes.

He growled in a low tone, frustrated that he was like a solid ghost. He could not have come out of nowhere; he knew that for a fact. Matter did not just create itself in a conscious form. Consciousness did not just happen. He knew those things for some reason, but he could not for the life of him remember anything about himself. His mind then echoed the word life.

There was something about life that seemed familiar, maybe even significant to him. He could not pinpoint what about life he should think of, though. It was such a vast concept, like an ocean of things to know, and his mind was not narrowing it down into ponds, lakes, or even seas to begin thinking on the subject. He had no clue as to what he should know about life. What was there to know? Was his life the familiar and important thing to him or was it someone else’s life?

Did he even know anyone else for someone else’s life to be important to him? He was not sure. He was aware there were others inhabiting the world, but he was not certain he knew any of them. He sighed and closed his molten gold eyes, hoping that his mind would offer him some kind of answer to anything or some kind of memory of anything. He just waited for something to show him that his mind was not completely empty.

The only thing that the new demon saw was black when he closed his eyes. There was nothing, like his mind was a void. How could there be nothing, Sesshomaru pondered in aggravation. Surely he had to have something in his skull. _I couldn’t have just arrived in this area fully grown, but fresh as a newborn child_. When he had seen his eyes in the water, they were the eyes of a person that had seen many, many things. So, why could he not recollect any of those things? Not even one thing came to mind. Why could he not recall anything?

He was content to sit there until he had one image or voice or something bounce through his mind since time had no meaning to him. He could have sat there for decades and more than likely, he would not have noticed. Things did not come to that, though.

Kagura eased down next to Sesshomaru with a scowl on her face. It was a nightmare trying to find out where he had been tossed. She knew he could not see her anymore, but he seemed to sense that she was there, she noted. He glanced to the side where she was situated next to him, as if he was acknowledging her like he usually did when she used to appear next to him on a cloud or something. She rolled her ruby eyes.

 _My, how the mighty have fallen. So, this is what you look like with skin, huh? Maybe the woman isn’t as crazy as I thought she was_ , Kagura remarked in her mind, even though if she spoke out loud, she did not think that he would hear her. She did not want to chance freaking him out, though. She knew from experience, beings not accustomed to dealing with angels tended to panic when presented with a celestial being for the first time, even in small doses.

Sesshomaru inhaled for a reason that Kagura could not figure out. She did not know it, but he could smell her. It was a very slight fragrance that she was not even aware of. She was a celestial being with no physical existence after all, so why would she even think that she had a scent? As she used to love to tell him, she was the wind and the wind should not have an aroma, but she did. She probably would have liked to know that it was fairly pleasant odor and he would not mind smelling it over a lot of other things that were around him.

From the scent, Sesshomaru knew instinctively that he should be annoyed with something. His face tensed slightly, twitching once as it did so. Kagura noticed the muscle tick in his face and knew what it meant. She sucked her teeth; _how dare he have the nerve to be irked with me when I’m here to help?_ _I should just leave him here being a blank idiot and that would show him_ , she thought. But, she did not do it because she could not do it, even though she did not know why she wanted to help him.

“Sesshomaru, I know you can’t hear me, but damn it, get off your pasty, cute ass and get back to that woman,” Kagura commanded, even though she doubted that he could hear her. Only the mortal that she was assigned to should be able to hear her in the Earth realm. Unless, of course, she was looking to break a lot of rules and go into a person’s dreams like a certain confused fallen angel.

“Sesshomaru,” he whispered in a breath. It sounded as if the wind had spoken the name to him.

 _Oh, the arrogant bastard heard me_ , Kagura thought with a start. “Good, you heard me, you flea-bitten prick. Now, get off your ass. You’ve got a pregnant woman out there, carrying who-knows-what. She’s going to need you, so get off your ass and get to walking,” she ordered again.

“Sesshomaru,” he repeated again. Was that his name? It sounded so familiar. He was almost certain it was his name. Well, it seemed that he had remembered something, even though he felt like he had cheated on that memory. It was like the wind had helped him recall what his name was. “Perhaps you could point me in the direction you believe I should travel in,” he requested in that haughty tone that Kagura believed would never address her again.

The guardian angel laughed just a little bit since that was all an angel could ever muster. She was amused because even as a fallen angel, Sesshomaru still had his arrogance, even without his memory. It would seem that underneath it all that was just how he was. She managed a small breeze and it blew by Sesshomaru. He nodded to show that he accepted that answer and he climbed to his feet. He started marching off in the direction that wind had chosen. She watched him as he left. He still had a regal appeal to him.

“Even as an earthly being, he still carries himself like he’s a cherubim. He could probably be a king around here,” Kagura commented while staring at his muscular back. _Perhaps that human woman knew exactly what she was doing_ , Kagura considered. “Who am I going to bug now that he’s gone?” she wondered with a sigh. She was already bored without Sesshomaru around and she doubted that was going to change anytime.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: there are speculations as to who is the father of Kikyo’s unborn baby while Sesshomaru is starting to learn some things about his new plane of existence. Will they ever be together again?


	5. Jezebel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

5: Jezebel

Sesshomaru wandered on through the woods, unsure of where he was going, but he could feel that he had to keep moving for some reason. Little by little, he was coming to understand the world that surrounded him. He was still very uncertain of himself. He knew his name, but nothing else came to mind. He still could not recollect where he came from or why he had been the forest totally naked; he was actually still quite nude. He was also unsure of where he was headed, but his instincts seemed to be directing him after a kind wind had gotten him started.

Despite the fact that he had been out naked in the sun, he was still pale. It was almost unnatural the way that his skin was near white, but then again, he did not know that. He also did not seem to pick up any dirt on his pristine body as he walked through the forest, but that was also something he did not take note of. He would have just thought that it was strange if he saw a smug on his flesh and would not know what to do about it anyway.

The fallen angel eventually walked out of the woods and came to a wide, dirt road, which he opted to follow. He followed the road for some time and eventually came to a quaint-looking village. He knew it was a village almost instinctively, like it did not even register to his mind.

As soon as people noticed him, they panicked, screaming at a volume that troubled Sesshomaru’s sensitive ears while running around like chickens with their heads lopped off. He could not guess the reason behind their actions and thought they were just acting ridiculous for no real purpose. _Humans are such unfathomable creatures,_ _after all_ , his mind commented.

 _Wait, those people are humans_ , the former angel realized. He knew immediately from that thought he was not human. But, if he was not human, then what was he? He was not sure because he could not think of any kind conscious beings aside from humans at the moment. _Maybe what I am has something to do with the strange marks on my face and wrists_ , he considered. He noticed the panicking humans bore no such marks. His eyes were sharp enough to take in their faces, even while they were all running around him.

He also noticed that they were wearing garments, covering their bodies. _Perhaps it would do me well to wear them, too_ , he thought for a second. But, that was countered by the thought that he might be mimicking the humans and that was something that he would never sink to doing, he was very aware of that.

General knowledge was not a problem for the platinum-haired male. He knew things about the world, enough not to totally panic anyway, but he could not think of anything that should mean something to him, even watching these humans did not trigger anything for him. He felt like he had dealt with them on many occasions, but none of those times came to mind.

“Halt, foul demon!” a human male commanded as he dared to block Sesshomaru’s path.

Sesshomaru hardly noticed the man, but he did take in the human’s words. _Demon? Is that what I am_ , Sesshomaru wondered. The term seemed very familiar, but he could not pin down where he had heard it. Perhaps he was a demon since he was aware that he was not a human. He would wait for his memory to confirm he was a demon rather than take the word of a human, though. _Perhaps I will come across a demon and then find if we are similar creatures_.

Once coming to that conclusion, Sesshomaru focused ahead of him again. The human that faced Sesshomaru was dressed in bits of armor and was armed with a dangerous looking sword. The blade shined as the sunlight hit the tip. The human had a scornful expression in his dark brown eyes that the fallen angel did not care much for. The human male was about average height and stood proud and strong for a reason that was beyond the fallen angel. His shoulders were square as he clutched his weapon and his legs were bent, ready to attack. It seemed he thought that he would take care of the intruding demon.

Sesshomaru was perplexed as to why the man would look so confident and arrogant while threatening him with a sword. It was not a smart move, after all. While Sesshomaru could not recall who he was, he was more than certain that he could go through the little hairless monkey without a problem if he so desired. There was just an instinct that told the former celestial being that he was more powerful than a thousand humans.

The tall demon continued to move forward, unafraid and definitely not intimidated by the man. The human gasped for a moment, as if he was shocked by the demon’s audacity and charged Sesshomaru without hesitation for disobeying his order. Sesshomaru did not flinch as the man came at him with his sword tightly in hand. It was as if he did not even notice that the man was bolting toward him with the intent to slay him. The man made a move for Sesshomaru’s head, but the fallen angel dodged with the smallest movement possible. He countered the human’s move with one of his own, slicing swiftly and cleanly through the man’s neck with his claws.

The human male gasped again as his flesh was opened in an instant and his blood gushed from his body. For a couple of seconds, he just stood there in sheer shock and his eyes were wide with disbelief. He dropped his sword and clutched his neck, hoping to slow the bleeding. The only thing the man succeeded in doing was getting his hands soiled with his own crimson life force. Sesshomaru was not affected at all as the man collapsed in the dirt street and gradually passed on to the next world, his blood painting the ground around him. There was something familiar about the scene to the former angel, but he could not quite place what it was.

Sesshomaru glanced down at the dying fellow and for a brief moment, he saw the exact second that the man’s soul left his body. He had died and Sesshomaru knew that instinctively. _Death is something I know very well_ , the demon realized. How did he know death, though? It was a mystery for the time being, much like everything else that involved him.

 _Perhaps, I slaughtered people_ , Sesshomaru considered. It seemed easy enough for him, after all. He glanced down at his pale hand, noting his claws. _Maybe I have them to kill people_. He saw his fingertips stained with small droplets of blood, but felt nothing. He lacked a desire to run out and butcher the whole town, he noted, but he did take into account that he felt nothing for the man that he had just killed. That man’s life might not have meant anything to him, but he completely lacked the want of going off to spill more blood, so he doubted that he just slaughtered people.

Unfortunately, Sesshomaru could not express his desire to not murder the townspeople. He had yet to figure out how to communicate and he only understood a few words, most things sounded like gibberish to him. So, when more humans ran out, hollering things in outraged tone at Sesshomaru with the intent of killing him, all he could do was defend himself. The fallen angel did defend himself in an excessive manner because he certainly could have stopped those people without slaying them. He dropped dozens of humans without any remorse that day. He doubted he would ever care about human lives, especially if they were all so eager to surrender them to his claws.

 _Humans_ , Sesshomaru’s mind scoffed as he continued on his way without having to worry about anyone chasing him. Before that time, he knew he had not thought lowly of humans, but now they had dropped several notches in his opinion. They seemed to be such foolish, tail-less monkeys to him. He doubted humans were good for anything if they were so willing to toss their lives away. _With luck, I won’t have to deal with humans much_.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo had grown rather large by now, sometimes wobbling through the village instead of walking. Her condition was clear to anyone with eyes, so her whole village knew that she was pregnant. They were… she supposed that the term to use would be “polite” enough to not speak about her right to her face about her condition, but in passing, she could hear all of the whispers about her. She knew she was the talk of the town and not in a good way. She had expected as much since most people did not have anything better to do with themselves than to gossip about others, but she did not concern herself with any of that because it was not like she could do something about what they thought. She was going to be pregnant regardless of what they said anyway.

The raven-haired miko’s main concern was for the safety and welfare of her very well behaved, unborn baby. She believed her baby was well behaved for the simple fact that the child had done her the service of remaining in her womb for the past few months. Other than that though, she had a very active child growing inside of her. The baby liked to remind the doting mother constantly that it was all right and it was probably waiting to come out and play by moving around quite a bit, usually in spurts at time.

The priestess was very careful of her child. She had been watching her diet and everything since she became pregnant, making sure to eat as healthy as possible for both herself and the baby. Sometimes it was difficult because she could not always get the foods that she required, but she still tried her best. She substituted one healthy food for another if she could not get what she wanted originally. She would not be thwarted in any quests no matter how small if her baby were involved.

She also tried her best to get a certain amount of rest every night, but the baby liked keeping her up some nights. She had several ways to calm the rambunctious life that she carried, but it seemed to prefer her singing to everything else. If she sang a song before she lay down for the night, the baby typically let her sleep until the sun came up. She was not sure why that was, but she considered the baby might actually be able to hear her and enjoyed being acknowledged. She had come to believe that anything was possible.

Kikyo had attempted to research the phenomenon of children being born to humans and angels, but she had not found much on the subject. She only came across one tale and it was not very heartening to someone in her position. Apparently, a long time ago, angels lusted after mortal women, who bore the angels offspring. What sprang from their wombs was a race of ill-tempered giants. The giants tried to destroy mankind, but they were eventually vanquished. Once again, it was not the most optimistic tale in her opinion from someone in her position.

“You’re not some terrible giant,” Kikyo told her child. She said this many, many times since reading the story.

The chocolate-eyed woman refused to believe that she was carrying some kind of monster that would have a taste for human flesh or something like that. The child between her and Sesshomaru would not be some bloodthirsty brute. She would make sure of that. Their child would be civil and courteous, unless of course the circumstances of the moment called for their child to behave differently. After all, it was one thing to be civil, but it was another thing altogether to be bullied or taken advantage of and to not do anything about it.

Kikyo did not care what history said about the offspring of angels and humans. She was certain that the spirited creature inside of her was not going to be like those giants. After all, the baby had not even harmed her, despite the fact that she was certain the baby could if the urge overcame it. After all, half-demons did it to their human mothers all of the time. Instead of being troublesome though, her baby calmed down at the sound of her voice and had been nice enough to remain in her womb for months now.

Kikyo continued her duties around the village, despite the fact that the whole place was talking about her rather badly in many cases. She just was not a spiteful person and decided to ignore what she heard rather trying to get back at the people. She still protected them all from demons and acted as an apothecary for them. It was acting as an apothecary that she was able to hear some of the things that were going around about her because that was when she was in the village. She was surprised at some of the things that she heard people saying about her.

“I heard she’s carrying Tetsunosuke’s baby,” one woman whispered to another, speaking about Kikyo as she walked by. Kikyo was on her way to see a patient, so as she walked by plenty of people, she got overhear their thoughts on her as she went by them. Of course, most of the time, she was sure they wanted her to hear.

“Yes, I heard they go into the woods alone sometimes,” another woman concurred. Kikyo was still in hearing range, but she did not say anything to either of the ladies about their assumptions.

The Tetsunosuke that those women were referring to was a hunter. As a hunter, it was only logical that he went into the woods quite often. Kikyo had never accompanied him there. She did not even know him very well. But, she could not say she was never in the woods at the same time as he was. She was certain she had been in the woods at the same time with plenty of other men. That did not mean she was meeting them all for trysts in the forest. She lived right next to the forest, after all. But, the rumor failed to take that into account.

The miko was rather insulted that anyone would think that she would have Tetsunosuke’s baby or any other man in the village for that matter. She hardly spoke to any of the men in the village. Still, some of the whispers were even worse. After all, the juicer the rumor, the more it captivated the gossipers and kept them all entertained.

“I heard that she had an affair with Shinji,” a woman murmured to her friend as the pregnant priestess went by. The woman was not very discreet in passing along her story, not even having the courtesy to cover her mouth as she spoke such things with Kikyo nearby.

Kikyo almost frowned as she heard that outright lie. Shinji was a married man with three children and as far as Kikyo knew, he was a very good man. She was offended by the rumor and how it implied that she would even think to touch him, let alone have his child. He did not deserve people dragging his good and decent name through the mud like that by attaching him to a baby that certainly was not his. His family did not seem to believe the rumor, though, but it still existed and it was very wrong.

Kikyo had been tied to plenty of married men in so many different rumors, some of the men were good, but most of them were notorious adulterers. It seemed that the busybodies if the village would like to believe that Kikyo would spread her legs for just about any man when, in fact, she had not spread her legs for any man at all. She doubted they would believe such a thing and she did not care what they thought anyway, which was why she never thought to correct them.

She was a bit surprised by how low people seemed that she could be. What had she ever done to imply that she had such a foul nature hidden underneath her withdrawn demeanor? She did not understand why people would make up and wantonly spread such tales about her. She had never thought the villagers liked her, but she never considered they thought so little of her to believe that she was capable of having sexual relations with almost every man in the village. Some people were different in the stories they spread, though. Not everyone thought so little of the kind-hearted miko.

There were a couple of rumors going around that Kikyo had been raped and she just did not want to say anything about it. Some people speculated a demon had been the one to ravage the dark-haired maiden. She guessed that those rumors came up for the simple fact that she spent at least one day every week battling against blood-crazed demons and she did live in the woods, which was where many of the demons came from. She doubted she would ever give a demon the chance to do such a thing to her. She had yet to meet a demon she could not handle. No matter how powerful the demon claimed to be, they all fell when they faced off with her. Once upon a time, the villagers praised her for those talents, long before they started whispering about her.

Others assumed that a man had raped Kikyo. Most thought bandits passing through the woods had gotten the better of her. She supposed was slightly more plausible than a demon for the fact that she could not reduce a human male to ashes with a touch of her hand like she could do an apparition with ill intentions. But, she still doubted she would allow such a thing to happen to her. She would sooner kill herself than have some man overpower her and take advantage of her. She definitely would not have lived to carry a rapist’s baby.

Rumors persisted over time because Kikyo did not say, and would not say, how she had become pregnant. She did not see why it was anyone’s business as to how she had gotten into her condition. It was not like they were going to be able to do anything for her by knowing who had sired her child.

She did notice that the more she showed in her condition, the more people stared at her and the less they spoke to her. People even seemed to shy away from asking for her help unless it was absolutely necessary. She knew they thought that it was shameful for her to walk around like everything was all right when she was carrying a bastard child and they did not want to associate with because of that. She really could care less than nothing about that. Her baby was her concern and she loved the child no matter what people thought of the baby.

-8-8-8-8-

“Ah, humans, how easily they shun each other,” Naraku commented as he watched Kikyo working in the town.

The adversary angel looked quite amused as he watched the priestess tend to tasks in the village. She was bundled in warm clothing, fighting off the chill that Naraku did not even know existed. He was more concerned with who interacted with her than if she was keeping warm.

Naraku was in the sky, far away from the action just because he preferred to keep his distance from humans. They were strange and somewhat revolting creatures to him. He watched Kikyo and the people around her. The people might take her help when they needed her, but that did not mean they would treat her like they used to because they found out that she was a harlot. Well, that was how they looked at her, anyway. Most of the villagers had lost all respect for Kikyo and were not below expressing that, but it was usually done when she was not around.

“Admiring your handiwork?” Kagura asked with a sneer as she appeared next to him on a cloud.

Kagura noted that unlike other adversary angels, Naraku seemed to get a perverse pleasure out his work. It was like he enjoyed making humans suffer, which she believed was bizarre. Angels rarely enjoyed their work; it was just a job and nothing more than that. Some angels loved humans because they seemed to be the favorites in all creation, but many angels just did their job because that was what they were made to do. They did not like or loathe their work. They just did their jobs.

“I merely handed her the punishment that she deserved for the sins she committed,” Naraku defended himself.

Kagura rolled her eyes. _How many times has he said that for whatever human he’s judged?_ “She doesn’t seem to notice the punishment,” she remarked as she cast her ruby gaze down on the topic of conversation.

From what the guardian angel could see, Kikyo barely noticed that she was slowly becoming a pariah as far as the villagers were concerned. Kikyo really did not notice because she always been sort of a social outcast since her mother died. Back then, people had looked upon her as somewhat of a bad omen. Her mother had been sick when pregnant with her and had never really recovered. The villagers seemed to think her mother’s illness was somehow her fault, which was why she never had any illusions that the villagers liked her.

Kikyo had been on her own in that little hut outside of the village since she was a little girl. No one helped her then and she did not expect anyone to help her now. While she had always longed for some kind of company, she had learned to do without. Now, she only longed for Sesshomaru to return to her.

-8-8-8-8-

“Do you think your father might show up before your arrival, little one?” Kikyo asked her unborn child while massaging her stomach with one hand. Such attention kept the child calm.

It was nighttime and Kikyo sat up in her bed as she did on some nights when she just could not sleep. She knew she should try her best to sleep, but she could not force it to come. She enjoyed talking with her baby, even if the child could not answer back. She just liked to acknowledge her baby and let the child know that she respected and cared enough to hold a one-sided conversation. The baby tended to be placid when she spoke and directed questions toward it, even though the child could not answer. The belly rubbing often helped.

“Maybe you’ll try to hold out until your father shows up. I don’t know if I like that idea very much. I mean, I would like your father to come as soon as he possibly can, but it does present a problem if you wish to wait him out inside of my body. What if it takes him a while? Would you stay in there for six more months? After all, you make it seem like these six months have been far too long. I know you want to come out and I won’t hold it against you if you show up before him. I do believe that he will come some day. I mean, he did seem so very pleased about you. He was almost astonished when he realized you were in there. He knew almost immediately that you were there, but he had more difficulty believing it than I did. Apparently, angels don’t reproduce like humans,” Kikyo reported in her best amused tone.

She recalled back when Sesshomaru informed her that she was pregnant. He sensed the life that had been sparked inside of her. He did not seem to comprehend that they had created a life together. It was just that angels did not have babies. Well, that was his excuse to explain why he was so bemused.

She had amused herself back then by commenting that angels did not have intercourse either, but Sesshomaru had gotten the hang of that quite well. And although he did not seem to entirely understand they were going to have a baby, he entertained himself with “touching” her abdomen as often as possible. He once whispered to her that they would have a glorious child, one that would never be rivaled. She had not argued. While she would not say that she was arrogant, she would say that she was confident like Sesshomaru and she believed that their child would be something grand.

“You’ll be a great child. I know you will,” Kikyo said to her unborn baby, stroking her stomach a little more.

The baby seemed to agree by shifting just a little. Kikyo squeaked just a bit from the surprise movement and was glad that no one was around to hear her make sure an unflattering sound. The baby then settled down again and the expectant mother could not help smiling. Yes, the baby would be a great child.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru looked up and down the road. _Am I headed toward something?_ It did not even seem to matter because he kept moving, even though he could not answer that question. He just knew he had to keep moving, especially in the direction he was.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Sesshomaru meets Jaken and Kikyo has a run in with the town jerk known as Onigumo. An annoyance for each of them.


	6. Smooth Operator

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

6: Smooth Operator

Sesshomaru continued his journey to who-knew-where. He still had no clue as to where he was headed, but he stayed the course because something inside of him told him that he had to keep going. There was something in his mind that he knew was not an instinct, but whatever it was demanded he keep moving. So, he kept on walking, like a man on a mission.

Through out it all, Sesshomaru had learned his name and that he was more than likely a demon, a very powerful demon. He grew stronger with every battle that he engaged in and there were no shortage of those, considering his lack of patience and the seeming hatred that he got just for being a demon. He grew to understand his body and abilities more and more with each conflict that he found himself entangled in. He got into other messes along the way that he could not so easily deal with.

The fallen angel had learned it was best for him to cover his body after a while because a lot of people made a fuss over it, even if they were not looking to fight him over it. He now wore clothes, which considered of boots, white hakama, a red and white haori, armor, and a long boa. He had gotten the gear from a very expensive market by threatening a vender with his claws. The vendor wisely allowed Sesshomaru free range over his merchandise and it was one of the few times that no one got hurt when the demon encountered a human.

Sesshomaru had decided to wear clothes after being gawked at by many women, and some men. The men were a lot more discreet about their stares than the females, but he still noticed them. A few women, demons especially, had even attacked him. Well, he looked at it as an assault. He noticed a certain look in their eyes and it recognized the expression as lust. He realized he needed to cover himself or he would merely continue to garner unwanted attention, and it would be more his fault than anyone else’s. It was then that he sought clothes. A demon could only take so many attempted sexual assaults against him.

The fallen angel did wonder how it was he noticed and comprehended the emotion of lust. He had difficulty reading and recognizing most other emotions. They all made very little sense to him no matter how many different expressions he came across. He failed to recognize them no matter how many times he saw them. He did know lust, though. It echoed in his mind, just out of his grasp. He knew it almost immediately, even the first time that he saw it.

He considered perhaps lust had been an emotion that he had experienced before personally. He figured he had to have experienced the emotion for himself because all of the other emotions that he saw in people made no sense to him. He did not grasp fear, sorrow, elation, nothing, even though he had seen them in his travels. But, he knew lust very well.

The golden-eyed male wondered who he might have directed such an emotion toward. _Why would I lust after someone?_ The women with the concupiscent emotion directed toward him seemed to put all of their attention toward his body, which was why he had covered up. No one’s body from his travels had made him react in such a way. Had he once looked at anyone with such hunger in his now stoic golden eyes? Had he longed to touch someone so deeply? Had he yearned to mark someone one as his and his alone? Yes, he could feel it in his veins like there was a fire burning inside of him that there was someone somewhere that he hungered for and only that person would ever satisfy him.

 _Am I heading for that someone? Will I have that someone again? Have I even had that someone before?_ His mind did not offer up any answers, as always. _You are quite useless brain_.

Sesshomaru tried to think, remember, conjure up anything to make sense of this emotion. _Who is it that I lusted after?_ An image flashed through his mind, but it was much too quick for him to decipher. _What was that_ , he demanded from his jumbled brain. Was his mind trying to recall the person that he lusted after? Perhaps he even behaved licentiously with that person. He could almost hear the prurient moaning of that person. The feminine, almost quiet, contented mewing of the person that he knew he had and now craved again. Just trying to think made him itch for her.

 _Why can’t I remember?_ He growled to himself in pure frustration. He was starting to get angry with himself, which was not something new. It had been happening since almost the day that he woke up naked in the woods.

The pale demon’s memories were not returning to him as he thought that they would. He still did not know where he had come from, why he had awakened in that forest naked, or why he did not recall anything at all. All he could do was go with his instincts most of the time, which he had come to realize pretty much put him on the same level as the animals or low-level demons. Even the wretched humans could rationalize things based on prior knowledge, which he had none.

Sesshomaru did refuse to believe that he was on the same level as anything that he had encountered so far. His pride would not allow him to lump himself with anyone that he met up with or saw, especially if they were lower than humans. He was not like those earthly beasts, he promised himself. _Earthly?_ That was an odd way to phrase things, he figured.

Now, Sesshomaru wondered why his mind would use the word “earthly” to describe everyone that he had come across. It was as if saying that he was not of that world, but he was sure that he was. He was recognized as a being of that world, so he assumed that he was a being of that world. If he was not, people would scream “monster” or “alien” when they caught sight of him, he reasoned. Still, it was a strange word for him to use, he believed. It would plague him mind for quite a time now that he was thinking about it. _Just one more thing to add to the ever-growing pile_.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo stopped walking through the village to catch her breath. She leaned against a nearby stonewall and placed her small hand on her swollen belly. _My, oh, my, little one, you are getting to be heavy cargo_. The baby had the nerve to shift, which did not make it any lighter.

“Very funny,” Kikyo muttered, feeling like the baby was mocking her.

She had been called into the village to aid a sickly woman, which she had done. The herbs she left the woman with should do their job and the woman should be back to talking about Kikyo within the week. Now, she was attempting to make it back to her home, but it was becoming quite the journey. Her baby seemed to be in a playful mood and moved around a lot, which was tiring her out. It did not help matters that she was carrying around quite a bit of extra weight now.

“I thought we agreed that you’d behave when I came into town,” Kikyo commented in a whisper while caressing her large stomach. She hoped that her actions would calm the child down.

The baby did not seem to be sticking to the deal that the expectant mother referred to. Kikyo remained supporting herself against the building while the baby moved around, seeming to just be having a good time tossing and turning. The ebony-haired priestess tried to calm her child down by continuing to rub her stomach, letting the baby know that she was there and to acknowledge that the baby was there, which was usually enough for the child to at least settle down for a few minutes. It was not working at the moment, though.

“Hello, Kikyo,” a creepy voice said from behind her.

The dark-haired maiden was not frightened, but startled by the voice. She turned around rapidly to face whoever it was that sneaked up on her. Usually, she would have sensed the person there, but the way the baby was moving around, it was the only thing that she could focus on. She frowned as soon as she laid eyes upon the scruffy looking man behind her. She also stepped away from him to put some distance between them in case he got the foolish notion in his head and actually attempted to touch her.

“Onigumo,” Kikyo said the name with distain. Her disgust with his presence was evident in her typically kind chocolate eyes. Her face was tense just from being near him and her stance was now rigid and guarded. She kept one hand on her stomach and the baby stopped moving.

“How are you today?” he asked with false civility. He smiled as he spoke, looking something like a rat. He was about as trustworthy as a rodent in her opinion.

“Leave me alone,” she ordered him in a very blunt tone. She glared at him with the hope the hard look would get him to obey. No such luck, but then again, it never worked anyway.

Kikyo often wished that Onigumo was a demon and that way she could purify him to be rid of him once and for all. She had saved his life not too long ago, and she now realized that was a mistake on her part. She knew that was horrible to think, but she felt like it was the truth. She was certain that he never did any bit of good for anyone, even if he might benefit from it.

Onigumo had wandered into the village a few weeks ago, suffering from several arrow wounds. Kikyo had been the one to nurse him back to health like she would do any human being. The other villagers refused to touch him and warned her to leave him be, too. These were the first words they had spoken to her beyond her work in weeks. She had not listened obviously and took care of him, getting him back on his feet. He squandered the second chance the moment he was certain he was going to live. He showed his true nature the moment that he was well. He was nothing more than a petty criminal, stealing and bullying the villagers. He did not care for anyone but himself. He was a horrible human being.

“How’s our little one today?” Onigumo asked with a cruel smile on his twisted face.

Kikyo chose to ignore the filthy man and continued on her way. She was thoroughly insulted that he would dare connect himself with her baby, as he often did now. He had started a terrible rumor that he was the father of her child. The very idea was laughable to her, but from what she could tell, many of the villagers believed him. She had, of course, been pregnant long before she even met him, but that fact was easily handled by his claiming that she used to meet with him in secret out in the woods where no one would know. It was because of their affair that she helped him when everyone else warned her away. It utterly amazed her at what people would believe.

Kikyo thought her baby was just as insulted as she was that Onigumo would try to lay any claim to both of them. The child immediately calmed down when he showed up, as if telling Kikyo that it was time to go and they needed to do it as quickly as possible. The baby seemed to stop moving just so that Kikyo could get going without having to worry about anything aside from putting distance between them and Onigumo. She was thankful for that and tried not to waste the present.

“You know you can’t escape me, Kikyo,” Onigumo stated smugly as he followed her. She was much too large to get away from him on her own two feet. It was not like she could run and, even if she could, he would catch her.

“Leave me alone,” she forcefully commanded him while trying to out-walk him.

“Why fight it, Kikyo? Our baby is going to need a father,” he commented, smiling arrogantly.

“It’s not your baby,” she hissed in anger. _This is Sesshomaru’s child_ , she reminded herself. After months of hearing all sorts of speculations as to whom her child’s father was, she had taken to reminding herself whom she created the life with. It was Sesshomaru’s baby and he was the only father that the child would ever need to know. It was Sesshomaru’s baby. _You are Sesshomaru’s baby_.

“Then whose baby is it?” Onigumo asked in a teasing tone with a smug smirk. He knew she would never reveal the child’s father, which was why he was aware that he could claim the baby and no one would dispute it.

“It’s not yours,” she replied bluntly.

“I’m the only person willing to claim that child, Kikyo. Why fight it? Be mine,” he said, as if he truly expected her to accept. He even had the nerve to extend his hand to her.

“I’d rather be dead,” she retorted quite seriously, sneering at his offered limb.

He smirked. “Well, I could arrange that too, but who wants to see such a heavenly creature returned to heaven at such a young age?” he remarked. It was like he actually thought that was clever, she silently noted.

“Just leave me alone,” the pregnant woman ordered again. She hated that such a vile man had taken an interest in her and it just made her long for her beloved even more.

“Kikyo, face it, you need me and you can’t get rid of me,” he seemed to boast. He did appear quite proud to say those words.

The miko could not do much to Onigumo at the moment. She was in no condition to fight with him in any manner and even if she did, she doubted that she would win unless she was armed. She actually had already tried to threaten him with an arrow aimed at him, but he called her bluff. She had not fired, obviously. She could not shoot a human being no matter how irksome he was or even the fact that she was just going to wound him slightly. She just did not have it in her to harm a human, even Onigumo. All she could do was resent his presence since no one was going to step in to help get him away from her.

The whole village seriously seemed to think and accept that Onigumo was her child’s father, meaning they believed that she had some sort of relationship to the bandit. They did not step in when they saw the pair arguing in the middle of the street because they thought that it was private, domestic matter. She bet if she asked for help while with him, the whole place would ignore her. If he ever worked up the gall to hit her, she would be on her own.

“I don’t need anyone,” Kikyo informed the criminal still following her. She had been on her own since she was about eight years old and, even before that, her mother had been a complete invalid for over a year. She had been fending for herself pretty much her whole life, so she did not need anyone to help her get by. She was a survivor. Even if she did need someone, she damn sure would not pick Onigumo to be the one.

“Trust me, Kikyo, you need me,” Onigumo tried to assure her.

“I need you to go away,” she riposted, still quite serious. Her face was still tight from his physical closeness to her. Sometimes, she felt claustrophobic when he was around because of how uneasy his presence made her feel. She had to control her breathing or she feared she would hyperventilate.

“What, are you waiting for the man that did you to take you back?” he asked in a mocking tone as if he was calling her a foolish woman with his voice. He was willing to bet that whoever fathered that child was never, ever coming back.

“I’m waiting for you to leave me alone,” she commented briskly.

“Kikyo.”

“And stop saying my name so much,” she said, almost letting her annoyance seep into her voice. He had used her name more in one week than everyone else that she had ever met combined. He managed to bother her by simply speaking her name. Now, _that_ was powerful annoyance.

Kikyo wished she could make it home soon. Onigumo would not follow her into the woods because he feared the demons that lurked there, just like most of the villagers. She had never been so happy to live in the boondocks until she realized the bandit would not pursue her there. It also helped keep villagers away from her, which was actually a very good thing now.

Some of the villagers, mostly teenage boys, would spy on the single miko if they were not so afraid of the demons of the forest. They often made plans to do so, but rarely gathered the courage to go into the woods at night. Their plans were even encouraged by some adults. There were some people who would like to see how she spent her nights, perhaps hoping to catch her in the arms of a man or maybe even a demon.

Mischievous boys had once tried to sneak into her cottage to do who-knew-what one night, but a demon had luckily attacked and garnered her attention, causing her to leave the cottage before the boys entered. It was a strange day she thought when she felt lucky for a demon to attack. It was a bit nerve wrecking to think about what might have happened if the demon had not come out to play.

Kikyo hated to think what could possibly happen if demons did not dwell in the woods or did not come out so often. She wondered what people might try around her house or what they might try to do to her since the villagers seemed to dislike her very much now. She doubted she would be able to sleep at night if it were not for the demons that surrounded her in the trees, the bushes, and other spaces in the woods. She was willing to bet she was the only human that felt safer surrounded by demons than humans.

“Now, I just have to make it to that safe place,” she mumbled, walking as quickly as her swollen ankle would carry her. Just as predicted, when she got to the woods, Onigumo faded away, back into the village.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru sighed in frustration. He was still very irked that he could not remember anything from the time that he woke up in the woods that day, months ago. He did not know that it was months ago. Time still escaped him. As far as he could tell, he was unchanged, so time did not seem to have any type of meaning to him. He noticed the sunrise and fall, of course, but considering the fact the he did not even sleep, light and dark continued to mean absolutely nothing to him. The sun phenomena meant nothing to him.

He hardly even took in the scenery that passed him as he continued walking. The countryside all appeared the same to him. Every road was the same, every village was the same, and everything in the distance was pretty much the same place as far as he was concerned. Everything blended together to him because none of it mattered to him.

The fallen angel merely did self-reflection as he continued to walk to he-had-no-idea where. He attempted to understand himself a little bit more because he thought that might help him recall something important. He knew he did not care about anything around him so far. He had no interest in interacting with people, human or demon. No one that he had come across sparked his fascination, but something did interest him. He was still curious about the person that he was certain that he lusted after.

Who was the person Sesshomaru once had an interest in to at least feel some kind of emotion toward that person? The more he thought about it, the more he could hear the person echoing in his mind. The breathy moans he was certain he created coming from her bounced through his brain and he soon felt a longing for her, almost aching to be with her. He did not comprehend how he could long for a person that he could not even remember. _But, I need her_.

He even could not recall the woman’s face. He could not recollect her name or even her touch. He could not even remember what she looked like. There was nothing for him to draw on, except the memory of her moaning and practically purring because of his attention. It was enough for her to stay on his mind, though.

 _Who is she? Where is she?_ The platinum-haired demon scratched his head as if that would help his mind remember something about her. Of course, it did not help. Nothing helped.

Her name was on the tip of his tongue; Sesshomaru was certain on that. Actually, it was not only her name that was on the tip of his tongue. He could almost still taste her, but not quite. It was enough to drive him mad if he allowed it to plague him, which was he was gladly doing. _So, who was this woman_ , his mind begged to know. _Was she a demon or was she a human?_ He could not imagine himself touching a human, but nothing about her being a human or a demon stuck out in his mind. _Damn my forgetfulness_ , he silently growled.

The fallen angel continued on his journey and came across a demon that was in his path. The demon appeared to be a giant monitor lizard, standing on two legs with his back to Sesshomaru. It was lurched over, prepared to devour something.

“Move,” Sesshomaru calmly, but impatiently commanded the demon in his way.

The lizard demon ignored Sesshomaru, which was a bad move since the golden-eyed male had no problem with cutting the demon down just for not moving. He could have simply gone around him of course, but why should he alter his path for a degenerate like the lizard demon? He did not see any reason as to why he should change his course even slightly, so he easily sliced completely through the demon with his claws and continued on his way, seemingly not noticing that there was a cowering little toad-like creature on the ground. He stepped over the toad, so there was a chance that he might have known it was there.

“What just happened?” the tiny creature wondered aloud and he looked at the dead demon that had been posed to eat him seconds ago. His face dropped because of his luck and in sheer disbelief that his life had been saved. He then looked at the back of the departing fallen angel. The toad stood up and gathered his disregarded weapon, which had been lying a few feet away from him; his weapon was a staff with two head adorning it. He then looked at Sesshomaru again. “Wait!” the green demon called at the top of his little lungs.

The taller demon did not stop walking. It was like he did not even hear the toad. The small green demon chased after his savior. It took the forest-green creature a few minutes to catch up with the long-legged Sesshomaru. The tiny demon was out of breath by the time he caught up and he did not seem worth noticing as far as Sesshomaru was concerned.

“Thank you for saving my life. I’m very grateful. In return, I pledge my life to you and will be your eternal servant,” the toad proudly declared. He bet he had just made the most sound decision of his life, to follow such an obviously powerful demon.

The toad’s proclamation did not get a reaction from Sesshomaru. It was like the taller male was not even aware of the little demon’s presence. The toad was not put off by the cold behavior. The tiny demon just continued on.

“I’m Jaken,” the imp introduced himself with some enthusiasm. His tone came from the fact that he was happy to be alive and saved considering the fact that a few minutes ago, he had been so certain that lizard was going to eat him.

Sesshomaru said nothing. He did not even look down at Jaken. He, of course, knew that the toad was down there, but he did not understand why, nor did he care. He did not require a servant, especially one for all eternity. He hoped the small creature was lying, but he could tell that the imp was sincere just from the sound of his voice. Maybe Jaken would get tired of being ignored and eventually go away, Sesshomaru figured.

“So, where are we going, master?” Jaken asked, not that he really cared. He was all right with just being by his savior right now. He would like the taller demon to talk to him, though.

Sesshomaru did not answer, not just because he did not feel like acknowledging the little toad either. He did not know where they were going. He was just walking in the direction that the wind seemed to tell him to go in on the day he woke up in the forest. He did not know if he had a destination to arrive at. He only believed that he did. Besides, he was determined to locate the woman who in his mind was only a series of moans and a face that flashed by too quickly for him to see. She was out there somewhere and he would find her.

 _I will find her_ , Sesshomaru silently vowed with determination. Well, he would find her if she was on the planet. Some part of him knew there were other planes of existence and it was possible she was not in the same one as he was. But, another part of him knew was not the case. She was somewhere out there. She was somewhere and he would find her. _We will be together_.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Kikyo has the baby.


	7. Cherish the day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

7: Cherish the day

Kagura watched Kikyo almost all of the time now. _I’m starting to get as bad as that idiot Sesshomaru_ , the angel thought with a laugh. Maybe he onto something with Kikyo, though. _She’s such a puzzling little human_ , the guardian angel silently conceded. Kikyo was quite fascinating to her, but not in the same manner that the human was to Sesshomaru.

Kagura did not understand how the woman maintained her pure aura while being drenched in sin like pouring rain. Kikyo had obviously done several wrong things and was judged for them. She was swollen with the burden of her sins and cast out of favor because of her actions. Yet, none of that showed in the aura that surrounded her. It was uncanny and Kagura could not turn her attention away from it.

“How in the hell can she be pure after being judged like that?” Kagura wondered, sounding quite perplexed in her own head.

She could not think of any reason for why the miko’s soul was not darkened like coal because she had clearly sinned just by being with a heavenly creature. It made no sense to and it was bugging the hell out of the angel, almost like an itch that she could not scratch. Not that she would know anything about that since she lacked a physical body. The point was that, this whole thing made no sense.

“There has to be something about her that I’m missing that shows she’s a sinner,” Kagura figured and she just watched more closely.

Kikyo had just woken up to start the new day. She patted her enormous stomach, greeting her baby for the morning. The baby shifted slightly just to let the mother know that it had felt the little pat, like every morning. She smiled.

“Good morning, my special little one,” Kikyo greeted the baby. The baby rolled a bit and she smiled again.

It seemed like it was going to be an average day. The priestess exited the house to see what type of day awaited them and then she inhaled sharply. She did not even get the chance to take in anything about the day outside. Apparently her baby had a surprise for her already, her water broke.

“Well, eight months was a good run. Thank you for that,” Kikyo said under her breath, trying to smile, but she could not manage it. She had not expected the child to stay put for eight months, especially since early on the baby was very active.

Kikyo started toward the village while maintaining her typical composure, but trying to hurry as best her condition would allow. She hoped she would get some kind of assistance with her labor. She actually took into account that many of the people had been acting like she had some sort of disease they did not wish to catch unless she was offering them some kind of help, but she prayed they would put that aside for her and her baby’s sake. The second she arrived she was shunned and it did not matter where she went in the town. The reaction was the same by everyone. Every woman in the village either ignored her or flat-out verbally refused to help.

“Okay, think,” Kikyo growled, looking around for something, anything to make this experience something she would at least live through.

The raven-haired miko made sure not to panic, even though it was a bit of an overwhelming realization that she would have to perform the dangerous act of childbirth alone. Okay, it was a very scary thought along with being overwhelming. She had seen her fair share of new mothers not make it to holding their babies and a few others succumb after days, weeks, or months later to the hardships of the labor that they endured. Her own mother never fully recovered from having her and eventually died from what people swore was a difficult pregnancy, even though the pregnancy had been over for years. She tried not to think about that because she did not need to negative thoughts at the moment. She _needed_ to remain calm.

“Please, just don’t be difficult,” Kikyo pled in a low voice with her unborn child as she attempted to make it back to her house as fast as she could. She did her best to ignore the anxious feeling trying its damnedest to build in her system, making her heart beat rapidly and her guts tie themselves in knots.

Kikyo had helped deliver many babies in her life, but she was not so certain she could do it on her own for herself. But, she was going to have to do it, she told herself. She was not going to lose her baby and she refused to die on her child. After all, the baby was all she had and she was all the baby had. So, she was going to have to do it on her own and there was no other option. _We will both make it,_ she silently vowed. They were both going to live.

“It’ll be no problem, little one. I mean, women have been doing this before midwives were ever thought of, right?” Kikyo said. “Animals give birth all the time without assistance. It can be done. We’ll be fine. We’ll be fine.”

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru stopped walking suddenly. He felt something race through him, but he was not sure what it was. It was like a powerful bolt of electricity had shot through him. It was quick, but extremely potent, easily stopping him dead in his tracks. He stood as still as a statue, even after it passed, frozen with uncertainty.

“Master?” Jaken asked with a confuse squint when he noticed that Sesshomaru had halted.

The silver-haired male did not answer the tiny toad. In fact, he still did not even acknowledge the small demon, even though Jaken had been following him for weeks. This did not stop the little toad from following him.

 _Something is happening_. _Something significant_. Sesshomaru was certain of that, but he did not know what it was. He could feel whatever it was just under his skin, making his nerves jump. There was something tugging at him with invisible wires. He turned his head several times as if he was attempting to locate something, but he could not pinpoint what that something was. Whatever it was, it was out there and he knew that it was bothering him. He looked around several times, but nothing caught his golden eyes. All he saw was the same road, trees, and mountains in the distance, but he continued to desperately scan around for… something.

“Master, is something wrong?” Jaken inquired, believing that Sesshomaru would have to answer him at some point in time. The taller demon seemed to be totally against recognizing the goblin’s existence, but that did not get rid of the tiny demon.

Sesshomaru did not as much as glance down at the small creature in his company; he tuned Jaken completely out. He wanted to know what it was that he was feeling, like his nerves were ready to leap out of his body and his stomach was flipping in his gut every few seconds. He wanted to know what direction was calling to him because of that feeling. The anxiety in his system was trying to yank him to something like they were opposite ends of a magnet, but he could not figure out where the pull was coming from.

The fallen angel continued to turn and look, almost like a puppy chasing its tail. His eyes were glazed over with a near panic-stricken look in them. He did not consider how ridiculous he had to appear. The only thing that mattered was finding the source that was making him feel such frantic discomfort. As soon as he figured it out, he would run to it.

-8-8-8-8-

Kagura parked herself Kikyo’s house, on the ceiling. The guardian angel watched Kikyo go through her labor, all alone. Kikyo had made it home and she tried her best to make preparations, but it was hard to do with contractions shooting through her body. She was still maintained her cool, reminding herself over and over again that she needed to stay calm for herself and the baby. They would make it through the labor, even if she had to do it herself.

“It’ll be fine,” she promised the child for the millionth time that day. “I can do this. _We_ can do this.”

The angel had seen the endeavor done before when she had female charges to look after; her male charges tended to avoid labor scenes and that meant she did, too. She had to admit there was nothing pleasant looking about the procedure and she could see why men avoided them. Actually, it appeared like the worst thing that a human being could go through. She did not understand the point in going through so much obvious agony either. Now, as an angel, Kagura did not know what pain was, but women’s expressions told her enough that nothing could be worth the whole process. The screaming did not make it seem any more desirable. If she were a human woman, she would try to avoid getting pregnant at all costs.

“Why would anybody do such a thing to herself?” Kagura wondered while staring at the struggling miko. There was the usual confusion in her ruby eyes when it came to Kikyo.

The guardian angel continued keeping an eye on Sesshomaru’s human for a number of reasons. The biggest one was the fact that Kikyo’s aura continued to fascinate her, of course. The human was still an anomaly as far as Kagura was concerned. Nothing about her changed from when she met Sesshomaru to now. She was still the helpful priestess, even though her village had made her a pariah. She was still somewhat of an optimist about life, even though there was nothing in her life that said things would get better. She was still the same Kikyo. Sesshomaru should have corrupted her, but obviously that was not the case.

“This doesn’t make any damn sense. How in the hell can she have been judged, not have repented, and still be pure?” Kagura shook her head. Kikyo went against everything that she knew of a sinner and it was driving her nuts to not be able to figure out why that was.

The ruby-eyed female also hung around to see what Kikyo was going to give birth to. She was a young angel and she had not been around when the first angels impregnated human women and produced the band of bloodthirsty giants that fed on human flesh. Of course, such actions had angered the higher-ups. She had heard one seraph referred to it as a bureaucratic nightmare. She did not understand the paperwork that went into everything. Sesshomaru tried to explain it, but she stopped listening two words in every time and he stopped talking four words in. It was a good system between them that worked well in that regard.

There were a few other times after that first major incident when angels lusted after human females, but never on the grand scale as that first time where over three hundred angels went to human women and ended up being banished for all of the trouble that had been brought on by their selfish actions. Angels always seemed to father terrors. It was like all of the parents’ sins entered the child and darkened its soul to unimaginable lengths. The offspring of angels were worse than demons much of the time.

Kagura had never heard of an angel being pregnant by a human. Actually, she had never heard of an angel being pregnant point blank. She guessed it was because an angel in its own element was never a substantial being, so once an angel was in the “real” world, the angel did not have a body, the makeup to support a baby. Supporting a baby and being able to create one was a difference that undoubtedly saved a few other angels from falling from grace.

Kagura wondered what Kikyo was pushing from her womb. Would it be a giant? She doubted it because the chocolate-eyed miko was not big enough to sustain a giant in her opinion. The angel wondered if the baby would be some kind of monster. If the parents’ sins did corrupt the child, how could the priestess produce a monster when her soul showed no signs of darkness? Only Sesshomaru’s sins could taint the child if that was how things worked and, despite what he was doing now, he had not really been corrupt when he fathered the baby, as far as Kagura’s understanding of how sinning went anyway. Sure, he lusted after Kikyo at first and developed a freewill, but he told Kikyo everything. It was not as if he had tricked her along the road to being with her.

“Was it even lust if this human’s soul remains pure? Wouldn’t his sin have tainted her?” Kagura wondered. It did not seem to be the case. But, then again, he was pure up until his fall, technically.

 _Wait_ , Kagura stopped herself as she realized the thoughts that had entered her mind. Was she attempting to justify the stupid and wrong actions of that moronic fallen angel? Well, she would stop trying on that one. He was an ass, who had screwed up rather badly from what she could see. He should have kept his distance and just done his job like any other angel would. No, he had to go out and mess everything up and now Kikyo was alone, giving birth to who-knew-what. _What an ass_ , Kagura thought, referring to the fallen angel. _The moron could’ve at least had the decency to make it to her by now_. She ceased to think about him and turned her attention back to the expecting mother.

-8-8-8-8-

The ass, better known as Sesshomaru, parked himself against a tree. He sat down because he could not go on at the moment. It was not that he was tired in any form, but he could not move another inch. There was something inside of him that felt… funny. It was funny in a sense that he had no idea how to describe it. It was a strange, uneasy, and almost painful feeling that built in his body with every second that passed. His throat kept going dry, his stomach was not behaving, his lungs wanted him to pant for no reason, and his nerves still felt ready to abandon his body, taking all of his insides with them. Something peculiar was going on.

“What is this sensation?” Sesshomaru asked the air in a very low voice, placing his fingertips to his chest.

Jaken did not get the chance to hear his chosen master’s voice for the first time because he was asleep against the other side of the tree. They had been there for a couple of hours, but of course, the taller demon was not aware of that. He massaged the center of his chest, golden eyes scanning the horizon.

The fallen angel tried to focus all of his energy on figuring out what was bothering him to the point that he could not move. There was something out there demanding his attention and getting it without his consent. He wanted to know what it was. It irked him to not be in control of something that was going on inside of his body and mind. What was out there? What was irritating him? What was going on?

“It’s like something is calling out to me,” he whispered. Now, if only he knew what. Well, where would also be helpful.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo screamed loudly to the ceiling. Tears that spilled from her eyes were flung from her face as she through her head back as another wave of agony ripped through her. If she could think about anything aside from the excruciating pain that raced through her from the top of head to the tip of her toes, she would realize that childbirth was just as extremely agonizing as it looked. She was going to make it a point to cry when it was over just because she felt like the process was definitely something to weep over. She apparently did not realize that she was crying now.

The miko punched the floor underneath her a few times when pain swept through her like an arctic breeze, stabbing her like a million needles at once. Her hand would come out of things worse for wear when she was done. She had also hit her head on the back wall, which she sat against, several times. And she did not learn to stop throwing her head back yet. It was incredibly difficult to remember that there was hard wood behind her when pain zipped through every nerve ending in her body.

Kagura was still the unseen audience, floating around near the ceiling for a bird’s eye view. Kagura certainly was all right with not being able to feel pain from the way that the dark-haired maiden made everything look and sound. She grimaced every now and then when Kikyo hollered as a new shot of pain ripped through her.

“Why the hell would anybody put themselves through this?” the ruby-eyed guardian angel muttered with an utterly confused expression on her face.

It just did not make any sense; at least, it did not make any sense to Kagura. She was aware that pain was not a good thing, especially if Kikyo’s expression was anything to go by. So, why would a human place herself in a situation to where she would have to feel pain? She did not comprehend how that could work for anyone.

Kikyo cried out again, louder than before. She could see why people did not try to give birth on their own anymore. She, personally, would try to never do it again. She had been trying to not to it that time around, but those damn village women were acting all high and mighty, as if how her baby came into being was their concern. How dare they judge her baby, how dare they shun her unborn child just for not knowing who had fathered the baby, and how dare they look down on her for carrying the child of someone she loved. It was not those busybodies’ business. It was not fair and it was not right. It was also mostly her pain doing the thinking at the moment. She then stopped thinking to let loose another shrill scream.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru could sense distress and agony surrounding someone off in the distance, making his anxiety build double by the second. He did not know who it was, but he could feel the sharp and continuous pain coursing through the person. The sensations coming from this person discomforted him, shook everything inside of him. He remained parked against the tree because of that, almost paralyzed by someone else’s feelings. He stared in the direction that his attention was drawn to because it seemed to be the direction of the anguish. His heart cried out to whoever was distressed, which alarmed him.

“Who are you?” he growled.

Who was the person whose pain he felt so clearly? Who was the person that his body seemed to know, even though his mind had no answers? Who was it? What was the person going through and why were they connected as they were? He did not have any of the answers that he liked. He only had agony, suffering, and tears. He could practically feel the person’s tears on his own cheeks, smell the salt of them, and taste their bitterness on his tongue.

“Is it that we are connected someway? Do I know this person?” Sesshomaru wondered while still gazing off in the direction that he swore the feeling was emitting from. “Who are you?” he begged, hand on his heart, trying to ease away the pain. Who was the person that could make him feel such intense emotions? Who seemed to have the power to cripple him from a vast distance? Who, his mind, body, and soul pled to know in despair.

“Master, are we no longer moving?” Jaken inquired because the taller demon had been sitting for hours, but he did not know that.

Sesshomaru only frowned, the expression cutting into his face deeply. The imp was getting on his nerves with his mere presence while he was plagued by some random person’s problems. He remained seated as the distraught emotion persisted. He still did not have a choice in the matter.

“Master,” the tiny demon repeated.

“Jaken,” Sesshomaru said in a clipped tone. It was his first time speaking the toad’s name since they met. Jaken seemed to be in utter shock by the acknowledgment, his mouth gaped open and his eyes wide.

“Master?” the toad said again in a shaky voice brought on by the fact that he now knew that Sesshomaru was aware of him.

“Leave me be,” the platinum-haired demon commanded in a tone so cold ice should have fallen out of his mouth.

Jaken did not seem to understand. “Master?”

Sesshomaru growled. “Now.”

Jaken whimpered and wisely dashed away from his chosen master. Sesshomaru sat there for hours until the troublesome feeling finally passed. It faded quite rapidly and he never did figure out what it was or why it came or why it had passed. He calmly rose to his feet and continued on his journey, going in the direction that he sensed the distress. Jaken quietly tagged along after him. _Who are you? Where are you? How are we connected?_

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo tried to catch her breath now that the extremely difficult part had passed. She had given birth to a baby girl. She looked like a lizard to Kagura, but then again all newborn babies looked like goo-covered reptiles to the guardian angel. She did not understand why mothers seemed so awed by the fact they just pushed out a separate species from their bodies.

Kagura had stayed and watched the whole, complicated procedure with admittedly macabre fascination. She doubted that both the mother and child would survive such a challenging process, especially since Kikyo appeared absolutely exhausted. The angel believed her suspicions were confirmed when another angel showed up. All that blood and the fact that the baby was not crying had to mean something.

“Hey, Kanna,” Kagura greeted the new angelic arrival.

Kanna did not respond, not that Kagura expected her to. Carrying on the stereotype that all cherubs were just about the creepiest celestial beings in all of creation, Kanna hardly ever talked, which made her just a little bit easier to get along with than other angels that outranked her as far as Kagura was concerned. Kanna also had a glassy, blank stare in her face as if she was always look through people and she carried around mirror that she typically used to collect souls. Kanna did the same job that Sesshomaru used to do and she was probably overworked since Sesshomaru’s banishment. There was no telling when the higher-ups would put in a replacement for the fallen angel.

“So, which one gets it?” Kagura asked Kanna. She expected the little angel to just point at whichever one was supposed to die. The scarlet-eyed female leaned toward it being Kikyo that was going to be the one dying because it looked like she had lost a lot of blood, she was drenched in sweat, and she looked ready to faint at the very least.

Kanna stared down at the new mother and the child with those empty eyes she possessed. The baby seemed to be making some noise now, not the loud crying expected of a newborn, but enough to let Kagura feel even more strongly that Kikyo was about to pass on. The little angel actually focused her attention on the baby. Well, if that actually was a baby, both angels thought. They were certain they were going to get to bear witness to a monster with celestial blood that probably craved human flesh. It might even eat Kikyo.

The baby’s head was crowned with ebony-colored hair, just like her mother’s. Her ears were slightly pointed, like a demon’s ears, which made them like her father’s. She was a tiny creature, just like a human newborn baby. There was nothing truly interesting about her upon closer inspection.

Kanna then turned her attention to Kikyo for a brief second. She then glanced up at Kagura and the guardian angel thought that was confirmation on her guess. Then Kanna shook her head.

“No one dies?” Kagura asked in disbelief.

“They made a mistake,” Kanna whispered and then she vanished.

Kagura accepted that because mistakes not unheard of. Honestly, sometimes she did not know how those paper-pushers kept their jobs with all of their miscues. It was a good thing that the people that executed the orders knew what they were doing most of the time.

After a few deep breaths, Kikyo managed to gather her new daughter in her arms and stared down at the now crying baby. The new mother smiled; it was a weary, but happy expression. “So, you’re the one that’s been running around in there?” she asked in a tired voice.

Kagura stared at the supposed monster. She looked just like any other child born to a human woman. Kagura felt slightly ripped off just because of that. She had been expecting a snarling beast of a creature that tore Kikyo limb from limb as soon as the miko picked it up and then an archangel coming in to smite the little abomination, but the baby was just a baby. If an archangel came in now, Kagura would think that something was wrong with the archangel, especially since the child’s aura was just as pure as any other newborn.

“How the hell is it possible that the child of an angel born to a human is pure like any other baby? She isn’t corrupted by their sins. Nothing makes sense anymore. But, then again, I should’ve known this was going to be twisted the moment that Sesshomaru became obsessed with her. Not to mention, she could see him. Obviously two signs that this wasn’t going to be normal and it’s keeping that up,” Kagura commented, sounding annoyed.

Kikyo happened to glance up to where Kagura had parked herself. The angel did not think anything of it at first, figuring that the human was just looking in that direction and not at her, as was often the case when humans “saw” angels. But, Kikyo locked eyes with her, causing Kagura to move back just a bit.

“What happened to him?” Kikyo asked, begging to know what happened to her lover.

Kagura was unnerved, knowing that the priestess was talking directly to her. She vanished because that human was creepy and she did not want to have to deal with something as disturbing as a human actually addressing her. The miko sighed when the angel left without answering her. She wondered what that was about. Had Sesshomaru sent an angel to look after her? Did that mean he had not fallen? He was not being punished? She supposed she would not know any time soon. She turned attention back to her new baby girl.

“We’ll be all right,” Kikyo promised her daughter. She would protect her daughter no matter what. She would raise her daughter properly and hopefully Sesshomaru would show up sometime soon.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: enter the inu.


	8. Diamond life, lover boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

8: Diamond life, lover boy

“Master, wait for me!” Jaken wailed, tears nearly gathering in his eyes as he pushed his way through some brush. It was bothersome being so small sometimes, he thought.

Sesshomaru left the little toad behind as usual. Sesshomaru felt like he was not getting anywhere as he continued to move. Everything looked the same to him. Everything seemed the same to him. His face was eternally tense from the frustration of it all. _I know there’s something out there for me, but where the hell is it? Why does it feel like I’m moving in circles?_

The fallen angel had come across humans that ran in terror when they caught sight of him. He had come across humans that threw their lives away, trying to attack him for no real reason that he could see. Honestly, he was sick of all of it. He was sick of humans.

It was strange to him how some humans seemed to value their lives like precious stones and made sure to keep away from him when he came through while others just tossed their lives away as if they were meaningless. _Humans continue to puzzling and foolish creatures_ , he thought. It was not like he planned on slaughtering every person he came across, only the ones that did not get out of his way fast enough or the ones that bothered him.

Demons were not much better than the humans in Sesshomaru’s opinion. _They might actually be dumber than humans_. They stood in his way as if they could stand against him when they could not even touch him. Some demons actually came out hunting for him. Apparently, he was popular, which was beyond annoying. He had gained a reputation, which he thought was a misfortune on his part. His reputation only seemed to make his life more annoying than anything else because more demons came to challenge him. And it seemed like demons could read his mind because as soon as that thought crossed his brain, his path was blocked. _Does the annoyance never end?_

Sesshomaru stopped as large bear demon came from out of the trees. The bear was much larger than he was and dressed in full armor. His face was more bear-like than human, covered in short brown fur, and his eyes glowed the color of blood while looking at Sesshomaru with contempt. He crossed his massive, thick arms over his chest while looking down at the fallen angel.

“Are you the white-haired demon everyone’s in an uproar about?” the bear demon demanded in a deep voice. Sesshomaru did not respond, but that did not stop the bear from continuing on. “They say you’ve slain many powerful demons and if I do away with you, I’ll be hailed the most powerful in the all of the land,” he boasted with a hearty laugh.

Sesshomaru did not flinch as the bear raised his weapon, a monster-sized battle-axe. The blade could easily cut Sesshomaru in half. The bear demon continued laughing, as he was about to bring his blade down on Sesshomaru, planning to kill the fallen angel with one strike. As the weapon came down, it impacted the earth instead of Sesshomaru, causing a giant hole in the ground and kicking up some dust. The bear’s vision was clouded for a moment from the dirt.

By the time the armed demon realized that he had not caught Sesshomaru, it was too late. The regal male put his hand through the bear’s back all the way out of his chest. The bear gasped as his body trembled from the attack. Sesshomaru swiftly removed his limb from his opponent. The bear collapsed in the dirt, still shaking from the shock. Sesshomaru continued on his way, still ignoring Jaken’s cries for him to wait up.

“Master!” Jaken wailed, poor little legs struggling to keep up. “You’re just as amazing as always, master,” he praised Sesshomaru, as if that would get the taller demon to slow down.

What Sesshomaru had just gone through was getting commonplace for him. Demons attempted to make names for themselves by coming to kill the mighty Sesshomaru, who they just referred to as “the white-haired demon” because no one knew his name. He did not talk to them, did not tell them who he was, and not because he did not know. He just did not respect them enough or care to say anything. He was ready to believe that life was worthless from the sheer number of idiots that continued to run at him and forfeit their lives to his claws or energy whip. He doubted he would ever understand the way people, humans and demons, operated.

To make matters worse, he still could not remember anything at all. His mind remained very foggy, but there were some images that were trying to make themselves known. A pair of ruby eyes liked to stare at him for a moment every now and then before he tended to blink them away. He disliked that the eyes seemed to mock him in some way. Whenever he caught the scent of certain flowers, a pale face with chocolate eyes flashed through his mind. Those eyes seemed to hold something that he could not fathom and they caused a little quiver in his stomach. He wondered who owned those pairs of eyes and what their relationship was to him.

It was not easy for his mind to try to get a hold on things because of the tiny creature following him and yelling for him every five seconds. He wondered why Jaken had not left yet. He was not paying the little creature any mind, so he thought that made it obvious that he did not care of the demon’s presence. Jaken did not seem to grasp that.

“Master, wait for me!” Jaken hollered once more and then he tripped into the hole that had been made by the bear demon. He shrieked and cursed his luck, along with his shortness.

As Jaken climbed out of the hole, he took note of the deceased bear demon. He gulped for a second, frightened because he did not realize the creature was dead and feared it might eat him as revenge on his master. When he noticed that the bear was motionless, the toad figured out what must have happened. His master had killed the huge bear demon with one blow, he realized. Seeing the kill only made Jaken more certain that he was following the greatest demon of all time. He was also being left behind by that demon.

“Master!”

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo was in town. She was alone, but would head home soon. Her child was being watched over by creatures known as soul collectors. Sesshomaru told her how to create the apparitions back when they were together and busy digging themselves deeper into sin. It was actually one of their sins as that was a craft forbidden to humans. He told her that they were chiefly used for holding onto souls that assumed no shape when they left their physical bodies, but they could be used for any number of reasons. Many of which he pointed out would be beneficial to her since she often could use help that she never received. The creatures did come in handy every now and then, especially since she had her baby.

The soul collectors were excellent protection for her child when Kikyo went into town. She usually used them to go out and collect fruits and other foods to eat since she did not have much money to purchase food. She had been reduced to bartering with people when it came to her services. After all, her daughter needed clothing and it was not like she brought in any kind of steady salary. So, when people requested her now, which they seemed to try to never do, she either took clothes for her daughter or rice as payment. And she had to take payments up front. It could be a trying few minutes.

“You can’t expect me to pay you for something so small!” a man objected loudly as Kikyo explained her price to him if he wanted her assistance. He sat down with his leg propped up on a stool.

“Something this small could result in you losing your leg later on,” Kikyo countered, motioning to his wounded knee. It appeared that he was paying the price of not cleaning a cut well.

“I’m not giving you that much rice,” he declared while holding his arms across his chest. He turned his head up, as if that was the end of the matter. His wife stood behind him, not saying a word.

“Fine. It was pleasant to see you both,” Kikyo said and she bowed politely to them. She started toward the door.

“Hey, wait!” the man called when he saw that she was leaving. She was not supposed to leave him as he was! He could lose his leg, after all.

“There’s nothing to wait for if you’re not going to give me what I requested,” Kikyo informed the couple in her usual tone.

The man looked at his wife, who looked back at him. Then they both turned their eyes to Kikyo, taking in her serious expression. They sighed and gave in. The miko returned to them and waited patiently as the wife fetched her rice. Once the payment was secure, Kikyo worked on the wound.

Early on when Kikyo first started charging, a few villagers attempted to cheat her. She would help someone with herbal remedies and elixirs and they would then send her on her way with nothing to show for her work. Men would try to intimidate her with their size, scare her into leaving their homes empty-handed. She was not so easily shaken, though and she made sure that they knew that. She had to be forceful for her daughter’s sake. She would not allow those people to make her offspring suffer in any way.

One of the reasons that the priestess did not bring her daughter into town with her was because she was not sure how the people would react in regards to her child. She just did not trust them to react in a positive manner. After all, some people speculated she had had a demon’s child and she did not want to see what they might do if they caught sight of her daughter.

Kikyo smiled at the thought of her daughter. She could not wait to get back to the little scamp. She could just imagine how happy the girl would be to find out that they were having rice with dinner. She smiled again, feeling light on the inside.

“Kikyo,” a malevolent voice whispered from an alley, immediately stripping Kikyo of her pleasant feeling.

The dark-haired miko knew better than to stop and acknowledge the owner of the voice. She did not have time to waste on him. As good as the soul collectors were at babysitting, she needed to get back to her child. After all, the apparitions were not exceptionally powerful and there was a chance that a dangerous demon could come along. They also were not clever and could not figure out many things on their own. Her baby could be injured if she did not get back home as soon as possible. But, the owner of the voice did not share her concern.

“Kikyo,” he growled and grabbed her by the arm.

Onigumo yanked the cocoa-eyed female into the alleyway. He forced her against the wall of the narrow space in a quick motion. Before she could say anything, he pressed her into the wall for her to get the idea in her head that he was physically stronger than she was, which, of course, she already knew. She frowned at him since she did not see the point in doing anything else. Onigumo grinned, a lecherous and creepy look.

“Kikyo,” the bandit purred in a gruff tone while looking her over, much to her disgust.

“Leave me alone,” she commanded in a strong, annoyed tone. She was so sick of him and sick of telling him the same thing over and over again. She wondered what it would take for him to get it in his tiny brain that she did not want to be with him.

“Kikyo, why do you continue to act this way? You know I’m the only man for you. No one else wants you. So, why don’t you give it to me?” he demanded with a furious snarl, knocking her against the wall again.

Onigumo was sick of the slender miko playing hard to get. She was a worthless member of society and yet she insisted on acting as if she had some kind of value, as if she were better than he was. She should just accept her place and become his woman, in his opinion. If not, he had not qualms with making her his woman.

“Give it to you?” Kikyo echoed with a disgusted curl of her lip. The implications behind the words made her want to throw up.

“Give it to me,” he ordered.

“Leave me alone,” she commanded once again.

Kikyo tried to push passed the thief, but he would not allow it. He banged her back up against the building, paining her a bit that time. He held her by the throat and pulled out a knife. She did not look threatened by the weapon, making sure to keep her composure. _Surely, he’s gone out of his tiny little mind to pull a weapon on me, though. Does he think I will just stand here because he has a knife? Does he think he can control me?_

As far as Onigumo was concerned, he had waited long enough, trying to wear Kikyo down and waiting for her come to him. He wanted her and he would take any piece of her that he could if he could not have all of her. If he could only have her body, then he would eagerly take it. It was a very lovely body, after all. He bet that it tasted just as creamy as it looked. He groaned at the thought of her around him. He would have some part of her now, the best part.

“You don’t think I’ll do anything?” the bandit asked because of the tedious look in her chocolate eyes.

“I have no doubt that you’ll try,” Kikyo replied in a dull tone. He might try to his rotten heart’s content, but she would not allow him a chance to have whatever he desired. Her body, as well as every other part of her being, was only for one person to delight in and Onigumo certainly was not the one.

Onigumo smirked wickedly, hoping for her to get the idea that he had no problem with forcing her to be with him. The expression in her eyes did not waver. The woman was so supremely confident in herself, which was something that captivated him, called to him. He craved her in a way that he had never craved a woman. He wanted her to be his and only his.

The bandit just failed to recognize that he wanted her in the same way that a person wanted a pet. In a way, he wanted her much like a person wanted a slave. He wanted to break her and command her. He wanted to be a god in the eyes of such a powerful and strong-willed woman. That was love in his opinion.

Kikyo was not inclined to be someone’s pet, slave, or worshipper. His persistence was rather irksome, too. She was ready to force him away from her since she knew no one in town would come to her aid no matter what Onigumo did to her. No one ever came to her aid, no matter what the situation, so she was about to summon a few soul collectors to get him off of her.

“Hey, what do you think you’re doing?” a voice demanded to know from the mouth of the alley.

Kikyo and Onigumo turned to see who was talking and if the question was directed at them. A flash of silver hair blew by Kikyo and for a moment, all she could do was think about Sesshomaru. Her heart skipped a beat, hoping that it was the angel. The owner of the silver hair punched Onigumo away from Kikyo, getting the bandit to drop the knife and he hit the dirt. The petty thief bounced because the power that he had been hit with. He slid a few feet once he touched down.

“Don’t you know how to treat a lady?” the silver-haired male commented. There was a certain swagger in his voice, but it did not sound like the cool confidence of Sesshomaru.

“Who the hell are you?” Onigumo demanded, remaining on the floor and hoping to avoid being hit again. Blood was pouring out of the side of his mouth and there was already a lump forming on the cheek that had been punched. His cheek throbbed with great agony.

“I’m the guy kicking your ass,” was the answer.

“Don’t you know who she is?” the bandit snarled. How dare someone interfere while he was dealing with his woman? And she was his woman, the whole village knew that and that was why no one ever came between them.

“Don’t care. I just know you’re holding a knife to her. I suggest you try that shit elsewhere because it ain’t gonna fly here,” the new guy replied with a half-smirk on his face. Thanks to his expression, he showed he had fangs.

“You’ll pay for this,” Onigumo declared with a growl.

“Bring it on.”

The bandit climbed to his feet and charged at the silver-haired fellow only to be met by a clawed fist. The thief grunted as the hard knuckles smashed into his skull with great force. Onigumo was knocked out of the alleyway and into another building because of the power in that blow. The new male smirked even wider than before, now beaming with pride over his work. Then he glanced at the fair maiden that he had just rescued.

“Oh, a priestess,” he commented in surprise, taking note of her clothes. “Well, you’re safe now,” he assured her.

“I wasn’t in danger in the first place,” Kikyo replied coldly because she was not in any danger as far as she was concerned and she did not ask for his help. She wondered why he would help her in the first place when no one had ever helped her in her life. She was automatically suspicious of him for doing something so peculiar.

“No?” he asked in a skeptical tone with an arched eyebrow. “Didn’t look that way to me,” he pointed out while jabbing his thumb in the direction of the unconscious Onigumo.

“Things aren’t always what they seem,” she informed him.

“Feh. How about some grub for a reward for saving your ass?” he suggested with a merry grin. He rubbed his palms together as he spoke.

“I don’t recall asking for your help,” she answered.

“Hey, you don’t gotta be so bitchy about it.”

Kikyo only rolled her eyes and exited the narrow alley. The new guy was not deterred, especially since he was looking to be rewarded for coming to her rescue. He did not help people out from the kindness of his heart, after all. He expected compensation for his work. So, he followed her.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Kikyo demanded, not bothering to glance at the silver-haired male.

“You owe me,” he replied, folding his arms into his crimson haori. He walked right beside her, like they were friends.

“I didn’t ask you for anything,” she pointed out once again. She did not see why she should give him anything when she did not ask him for anything. She was wary as to why he helped her anyway. A meal seemed like too simply a price to pay for him going out of his way for her. Something was off here.

“So what? You still owe me,” he argued with some attitude. “I already helped, so you can’t argue this. I helped you, so therefore you owe me. So, I hope you’re a good cook and you have something good to eat because I’m starving!” He licked his lips and rubbed his belly.

Kikyo almost snorted in anger with his assumption. “Listen, demon, I don’t want to shoot you with a sacred arrow, but I will, especially if you continue to follow me,” she informed him quite seriously.

He scoffed, calling her bluff. “Yeah, right.”

Kikyo did not say anything in response until they got to the woods and the silver-haired demon continued to follow her. The idea of demons in the forest did not seem to shake him at all, which she expected. She did not care that he did not stop when they got to the woods, but she had a way to keep him from following her any farther. She suddenly turned around and aimed an arrow at him, out of the blue in his opinion. He was a bit shocked and his little dog ears flattened out on his head because of his confusion.

“Get out of here, now,” Kikyo ordered, her voice was forceful and raw. The glare in her eyes was deadly serious.

“Whoa, what the hell is your problem?” he inquired, holding his hands up as if he surrendered. “Could you be any more crazy random, especially after I just helped you and everything?”

“Get out of here!” she commanded again. He was much too close to her home, too close to her baby.

“Seriously? What is your problem? I help and you try to kill me? I just want a little grub,” he pointed out.

“Mommy!” a tiny voice called.

His ears perked up because of the sound. Kikyo glanced back for just a second. Oh, that was her problem, he figured out. _She’s trying to protect a brat_. He smiled a bit and that only made Kikyo tenser than she already was.

“Angel, stay back,” Kikyo commanded loudly, making sure her child heard her clearly.

“Why, Mommy?” the tiny voice asked in a very curious tone.

The child came into view with a couple of demon insect-like creatures. The silver-haired male looked over at the little girl. She had long ebony hair, some of which was pulled into a ponytail on the side of her head. She had big brown eyes, slightly tanned skin, and smelled like clean earth and fresh grass. He guessed that was because she spent a lot of time outside. The girl smiled and all he could do was think that the priestess was being touchy over her brat, which was weird in and of itself.

He had never met a miko with a child. He thought maybe she was not the brat’s mother, but her guardian in some way. That made more sense than Kikyo being a mother to him. Either way, she was still touchy about the kid and he did not want to get an arrow in the chest when all he wanted was some food.

“Angel, stay back,” Kikyo ordered again.

“Oh, a puppy!” the child cheered when she caught sight of the silver-haired demon and undoubtedly took notice of his little ears.

“Hey, I ain’t no puppy!” he barked with an offended look in his golden eyes.

“Don’t yell at her,” Kikyo commanded, keeping her arrow aimed at the male.

“Look, lady, I don’t mean the kid no harm,” he informed her. He would never hurt a child. That was just way too low.

“Then turn around and go back to where you belong,” the priestess stated.

“I don’t belong nowhere. I just walk around,” he declared rather proudly, as if she was supposed to be impressed by that.

“Then walk back to the village,” she suggested in a forceful tone.

“I just want something to eat.”

“Get it back at the village.”

“They ain’t going to feed no damn hanyou,” he pointed out and he knew that as a fact. He had been enough places to know he would not be greeted in a friendly manner if he hung around that village.

“We don’t have enough food,” Kikyo informed him, hoping that would get rid of him. They typically only had enough to feed themselves and on some nights, they only had enough to feed her daughter.

“Actually, Mommy, we do. We’ve got plenty of fruits and nuts thanks to Ryu and Kiba,” the child reported while petting the two apparitions with her. She had taken it upon herself to name any of the soul collectors that her mother summoned up and she could tell them apart even better than her mother could. They responded to the names, too.

“See, you’ve got plenty of grub and that’s all I want,” the silver-haired male stated with a nervous smile. He tried his best to look as non-threatening as possible, but Kikyo did not see to buy his act. She did not lower her bow or even relax the slightest in her stance.

“It’s all right, Mommy. We’ve got plenty of food,” the child said once again. She hoped that the new guy came to the house and then they could have company. Maybe she could even make a friend. She thought that would be just the best.

“And the kid likes me. It’s cool,” he said, but Kikyo did not lower her weapon. He offered her another nervous smile and then decided to introduce himself as an attempt to take some of the edge off of things. “I’m Inuyasha,” he stated in a friendliest voice that he could muster considering one false move could be his last.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Inuyasha sticks around, growing on the mother and daughter. Will Kikyo’s love for Sesshomaru falter with Inuyasha now there?


	9. Oh, what a life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

9: Oh, what a life

Sesshomaru felt as if something was wrong in the universe, but he could not figure out what that was. He stared at the clear blue sky for a long moment and tried to unravel the mystery. It did not seem pressing, but it still bothered him, scratching at the back of his mind. He then turned his head to the right, stepping off of the road that he was on and started walking in that direction, through a patch of open grass. It felt like the correct direction to get to where he needed to be. _Perhaps this new course will get rid of this new feeling_.

-8-8-8-8-

“Rin, give that back!” Inuyasha hollered, almost whining, as he chased the little girl around the front of the hut. She giggled madly while running from him, oblivious to any danger that she might be in and also the anger that boiled in Inuyasha’s system.

Why was the hanyou chasing Rin? Well, she had his breakfast and that was his reason to run after her with a look of pure fury in his golden eyes. She was a playful little brat, he noted, which he seemed to notice every morning. He guessed she enjoyed playing with him because she did not have any friends. It was something that he could relate to, being a hanyou and all. He was a born outcast, so he never had friends.

Inuyasha had come to believe that Rin was a hanyou, too, but he was not sure. She did not have the scent of a human, but she did not have the scent of a demon either. She did not smell like a hybrid of the two species. He was not sure what she was.

He noticed she did not have any markings like a demon would. He did not have any markings either, but usually a half-breed had something that stood out to show they had demon blood. From what he could tell with Rin, she did not have such a feature. If it was not for his nose, he might have assumed the girl was totally human, but there was something about her that was just beyond human.

“Rin, angel, don’t torment Inuyasha,” Kikyo called calmly from the inside of the hut. She was mending some of Rin’s clothes. That girl was hard on her outfits.

“But, Mommy!” Rin replied with a lighthearted laugh and then Inuyash tackled her, rather roughly. He treated her like a little boy, Kikyo noted. She guessed it was because he was not used to dealing with little girls, but her daughter did not seem to mind and she did not get injured with him, so Kikyo let them roughhouse. Rin grunted as she hit the ground, but then went right back to giggling.

“Gotcha!” the hanyou declared with a proud grin while holding the child down by her legs.

“Nah-uh!” Rin said and then she gobbled down as much of his breakfast of grilled fish as she could. Inuyasha looked as if he was about to burst into tears.

“Kikyo!” the silver-haired male howled at the top of his lungs.

Kikyo could guess what happened, especially since it happened about three times a week. Inuyasha had been staying with them for months now. Well, it might have been inaccurate to call what he was doing “staying with them.” He showed up for meals and played a few games with Rin for a few hours every day. He seemed to spend most of his time running through the forest or getting into arguments with the villagers.

Inuyasha did keep Onigumo away from Kikyo when she went into the village. At first, he would accompany her there and keep the thief away with his presence, but eventually the bandit got the idea to stay away from her even if she was alone. The hanyou noted he did not get much credit from Kikyo, even though he felt like he did her a great service.

Inuyasha also had the bad habit of stealing from the villagers when he went into town, until Kikyo started making him return things anyway. She was such a spoilsport, he thought. Still, he typically returned things when told to do so.

“Rin-chan, you can’t keep eating Inuyasha’s breakfast,” Kikyo pointed out as she exited the house.

“Sure I can,” Rin replied with a toothy grin. Her expression made it clear that she misunderstood her mother.

Kikyo shook her head to show her amusement. Her daughter was innocently mischievous. In other words, she did not mean any harm or malice when she did anything. She was just having childish fun and she did not understand the problems that she could cause with having fun. She did not understand when her mother told her that she could not do something that she clearly could do. She did not grasp that something just was not proper. It was more than likely because she was overwhelmed by a presence someone other than her mother and the soul collectors. She thought Inuyasha was great fun to be around.

“You little brat,” Inuyasha pouted and he pushed Rin enough to throw her off balance, but not enough to push her over. The child merely giggled while straightening herself out.

“Inuyasha, don’t call her a brat,” Kikyo scolded him. She would have reprimanded him on the push, but she knew that he did not mean any harm with that and Rin liked roughhousing as much as he did.

“She is,” he huffed, folding his arms across his chest and glaring at the little girl. He wanted his breakfast back! Ah, she was such a little brat.

Kikyo only shook her head; the hanyou was such a big baby most of the time. When he was there, it was almost like having two children. It had taken the miko a long while to get somewhat comfortable with him being around. She would have frightened him away a long time ago, but Rin liked him; she especially liked his ears.

The priestess remembered when her daughter first noticed Inuyasha’s ears that first night he stayed for dinner. The little girl had crawled all over Inuyasha to tug on his ears much like a baby would do with anything it got its hands on. She had giggled, thoroughly amused, saying that his ears were funny; her exact words “funny like mommy’s.” Inuyasha had not understood, but when Rin said that his ears were like her mother’s, it just meant that their ears were not like hers.

Rin had pointed ears, but her hair tended to cover those. She had once shown Inuyasha her ears and their shape puzzled him. He thought only full demons had the pointed ears, but Rin certainly was not a full demon. Nothing about her even said half-demon and she had just messed up his mind by showing her that she had ears like a full-blooded demon. He doubted he would ever know what Rin was, aside from her being a real brat anyway. Yeah, she was definitely a full-blooded brat.

“I want my breakfast…” Inuyasha whined, tears practically gathering his eyes.

Rin, oblivious to the pain that she caused the hanyou, smiled and started tugging on his sleeve. She wanted to play some more. Kikyo smiled at the sight and went back to mending Rin’s clothes.

“Don’t leave,” Inuyasha pled with Kikyo. “Make her gimme back my breakfast!”

The priestess still smiled, but did not answer his request. Yes, having Inuyasha around was almost like having another child. He groaned as he realized that he was on his own for breakfast.

-8-8-8-8-

Inuyasha spied Kikyo sitting outside of her hut late one night. He wondered what she was doing, just parked outside of the house. She was leaning against the wall and staring up the starlit sky. She appeared to be deep in thought, but her eyes reflected an underlying sorrow within her. He recognized an intimate moment when he saw one, but he did not care. It was one of his many flaws, but he did not think of it like that. He invited himself into her moment, flopping down next to her. She moved away from him just a bit as soon as he was next to her.

“Why do you do that?” the half-demon inquired curiously, almost sounding insulted.

“Do what?” the raven-haired woman countered.

“Move away from me when I try to get near you?” he clarified. She always moved away from him. It was like she had to be about arm’s length away from him at all times. He wondered if it was because he was a hanyou, but he was not sure about that because she did not seem to mind having him around. Besides, she had her own more than likely half-breed child, so he did not think that his demon status had anything to do with it.

Kikyo glanced at the hanyou as if that answered his question. There were several answers to his inquiry, none of which she wished to offer. She took a moment before decided to open her mouth.

“I like space,” she simply answered, keeping her eyes on the sky.

The miko did like her space, but she also did not like being next to a demon male. Inuyasha represented two groups that she was not comfortable with, namely the opposite sex and the opposite species. She moved away from him more subconsciously than consciously, but even if she did think about, she would still move away from him.

Inuyasha accepted that because it made sense. “Oh, that’s cool. So, what’re you doing out here?” he inquired, his voice a little quieter than usual, a little kinder than usual.

“Nothing,” Kikyo answered. She did not see why what she was doing was any of his business.

“Oh,” he muttered, eyes on the sky now. He respected the fact that she was closed off. He was that way, too. Really, he only hung around the area because she fed him and Rin was very fun to bug out with. Kikyo, though, she was drag in his opinion. She always had that somber look in her chocolate eyes, even when she was with Rin. When she was with Rin, there was a joy in her eyes, but still there was a hint of sorrow. He did not understand how she managed that. She was weird.

“Is there something you want?” Kikyo asked. She figured since he did not hang around her often, he probably wanted something from her.

“No, not really. Well, yeah. I was wondering something,” he answered.

She decided to humor him, hoping that he would leave her alone quicker if she did. “About?”

“You and Rin,” he said.

“What about me and Rin?” she asked.

“Well, why you are here first of all?” he inquired.

“Well, why are you here?” she countered.

Inuyasha’s face scrunched up and he frowned a little. If he were someone else, he would have told her about himself to gain information, opening himself up to get her to do the same. He did not think like that, though. It never even crossed his mind to tell her about himself to get her to open up.

“I asked you first,” he stated.

“Touché,” she said dryly. _He certainly has wit on him_ , she thought sarcastically.

“Come on, what’re you doing here?” he asked again. “I mean, I don’t get why you live next to a village full of people that don’t even like you. Of course, I don’t get why the hell they don’t like you, but whatever. That’s on them. You have a daughter to worry about and everything. So, why are you living out here in the boondocks?”

“We live here, have for years,” she answered as simply as she could. For her, it made sense for her to be where she was, to stay in her mother’s house, and to pretty much continue on with her existence as she had since she was born. She was content and that was good enough.

“Okay,” he said to accept that, even though it did not help him make sense of anything.

“You want to know about Rin’s father,” Kikyo said bluntly.

The ebony-haired priestess was aware that Inuyasha was curious like everyone else when it came to whom she had a baby by. Not too many people had seen Rin and Inuyasha had been the only person to interact with the girl aside from her mother, so it was understandable that he was more curious than others. The people who had seen Rin often mistook her for a human and thought that she was the daughter of Onigumo. Inuyasha knew better than that, but he still could not figure out what Rin was. There was something about her smell and aura that just were nothing like anything he had ever experienced.

“Well, yeah. I mean, at first I thought a demon might’ve raped you or something,” Inuyasha informed her.

“And why would you think that?” she asked with an elegantly arched eyebrow. It was a valid conclusion and quite a few people had thought that when she was pregnant. She was just curious why Inuyasha would think that when he had seen Rin and could tell that she was not a hanyou more than likely.

“Couldn’t think of any other reason for a miko to have a half-human brat. Besides, you always look so sad, even when you hold her,” he explained.

Kikyo did not know that she looked sad when she held her child. She just could feel a sorrow that never went away, like she was forever in mourning, but she did not think that it would show in her eyes, especially when she was embracing her baby. Whenever she held Rin, she felt joyful of course, but she also thought of _him_. She missed him so much and she wished he would return and see their precious and darling child. She wanted him to come back, not just for her, but for their daughter. Rin deserved to have her father around.

“What do you think now?” Kikyo asked Inuyasha, giving him a glance before returning her attention to the night sky.

“Huh?” the hanyou said with a puzzled face.

“You said ‘at first,’ indicating that you changed your mind,” she elaborated.

“Oh, right. Well, I haven’t really changed my mind. I just completely junked that idea,” he answered, making a flip motion with his hand to emphasize his dismissal.

“Why?” she asked. She did not think he came to a bad conclusion, especially considering she noticed he was not a very heavy thinker. He was an “on-the-surface” kind of guy. He did not like getting mixed up with details, probably because he was easily confused. There was nothing wrong with being simple, but it did lead him to be impulsive sometimes, like when he rushed in to “rescue” her from Onigumo.

“I don’t know, but you don’t take me as a woman that was raped. Your sadness doesn’t seem like it came from that. Is it just that you miss Rin’s father?” he inquired.

Kikyo did not answer because that was a very personal question and it was none of his business. She missed Sesshomaru with all of her heart. He was her lover; she loved him in every way and she did not know what happened to him. As far as she knew, he just vanished. He could have been dead for all she knew, if an angel could be killed anyway. He could have been banished to the abyss like he told her other angels had been for coupling with mortal women. He could still be in the Heavens and just done with her, not that she believed that one. She just did not know and that only added to the distress of him not being around.

“Was Rin’s father a demon?” Inuyasha asked once he realized that she was not going to respond to his last question.

“No,” Kikyo replied honestly and plainly.

“No?” he echoed and his shock was evident in his voice.

“No. Was your father a demon?” she riposted.

Inuyasha seemed taken aback by that question and turned his head up for a moment like he was offended. “What the hell does that have to do with anything?” he inquired, seemingly upset.

“You want information, but you’re not willing to share any,” she pointed out in her usual tone. She was not bothered by the fact that he was irritated. If he stayed or if he left because he was now upset made little difference to her.

“Oh. Well, I’m not like that. I don’t do all the talking bullshit,” he informed her, turning his mouth up for a second.

“You’re talking now,” she told him.

“Well, I don’t share,” he declared as if that was an accomplishment.

“Fair enough,” she replied with a slight shrug. Since he did not share, she did not see any reason as to why she should share. Her life was none of his business. Her daughter’s life was none of his business. She focused her full attention back to the nighttime sky.

The hanyou attempted to ask more questions, but Kikyo was her usual tightlipped self about things. It took him a while to understand why; in fact, it took him days to comprehend the reason that she stopped talking to him. By the time he figured it out, she was back to sitting outside and watching the night sky. He sat down with her again.

“What can I do for you, Inuyasha?” she asked in a calm voice. She was a bit upset with him for interrupting her time alone. She just wanted to sit there and let her mind wander aimlessly for a little while, but apparently, her guest had other plans. She actually wished that he would just leave her alone.

“My father was a demon. He died before I was born, so I never really knew the guy. I’ve heard things about him, like how great a fighter he was, how fierce a warrior he was, how in love he was with my mother, but that’s all I got. Just stories. It’s not the same,” he informed her with a sigh.

“No, it’s not,” she concurred. This is what she did not want for Rin. Rin deserved to have her father in person.

“All I ever had was my mother. Nobody else ever wanted me because I’m a hanyou. She died when I was kid and I’ve been running around ever since,” he explained in a low voice, but he spoke a fairly quick because he wanted to get it out of the way.

“Like a wild child?” Kikyo guessed.

“Just like the one you’re raising,” he taunted her with a large, good-natured smirk.

Kikyo smiled a bit, too. “She’s just excitable for whatever reason.”

“Yeah, that brat certainly is excitable,” he agreed with a chuckle. As much as that kid jumped around and always giggled over something, “excitable” was an understatement in his opinion. “Why’s she like that?” he inquired in a puzzled voice. She was almost the exact opposite of Kikyo.

“That’s just how she is,” the priestess replied with a shrug. Rin was always a smiling, almost bubbly child, even when she was a baby. She always laughed and then when she could crawl, she always moved rapidly with a grin on her face. She was just a jubilant child, which brought light into Kikyo’s life.

“So, it’s not inherited or anything?” he asked.

“You’ve seen how I am. You think she inherited that personality from me?” Kikyo countered.

Inuyasha laughed a bit. “No, I don’t think that. I thought maybe she got it from her pops, but then again, you don’t seem like you’d fall for that lively sort of guy neither,” he commented.

“You can read me well then,” she stated flatly. While she loved her child’s personality, she could not imagine dealing with a grown man who behaved in a similar fashion.

“I knew it. But, I can’t figure out anything else,” he admitted while scratching his cheek a bit.

“What else is there to figure out? Why it is so important? I thought you were only here for the food,” she pointed out.

“Feh, I am,” he stated gruffly.

“Well, then, what does it matter who’s Rin’s father?” she inquired. She was curious about his curiosity because it was just not something that she was accustomed to.

“I was just curious is all,” he replied, turning his mouth up in a defensive manner.

There was a moment of silence. Inuyasha was not sure what to make of it. He considered Kikyo might be ignoring him; heaven knew it would not be the first time. He glanced at her and then she started talking, which surprised him slightly.

“He was an apathetic looking fellow, bordering on dour. He didn’t understand a lot of things, a lot of things that most people take for granted. He didn’t understand emotions, but he felt them. He showed them in his actions, but had no clue he was even doing that. We weren’t supposed to be together and he told me to treat each moment as it was our last. Our last moment together was by that tree,” Kikyo told him while pointing to the tree in the distance.

She remembered she had been reading poetry to their unborn child and she could sense him there, but she could not see him. Oh, how she wished she had at least been able to see him then, to feel him, to at least promise him that she would wait. She wished she could have kissed him, embraced him. Just something instead of the nothing she had been left with. All she had was Rin and she was frightened that one day, she might not even have their baby. But, she would hold on and protect Rin with everything she had in her.

“So, you don’t know what happened to him?” Inuyasha inquired in a low voice, as if he was feeling a bit of empathy.

“I don’t know. I just know that he’s gone right now. He may or may not come back,” the priestess answered.

The hanyou nodded because he did not know what else to do. “That’s tough. Do you think he’ll come back?”

“I think he’ll try,” she replied honestly. Considering the fact that she did not know what might lay in Sesshomaru’s way, the least she could believe was that he would try to make it to her and their child. _He so longed to see our child_. _Surely that’s enough to drive him_ _back to use._

“When was the last time you saw him?” he asked. He wondered how long she had been waiting around for that man. He figured it had to be longer than he was around. He gave it a few months before he showed up.

“Five years ago,” Kikyo replied.

“Five years?” he shouted in disbelief, his jaw practically in the dirt.

“Shh. You’ll wake Rin,” she reprimanded him, putting her finger to her lip.

“Right.” Inuyasha quieted down after taking a calming breath. “You mean to tell me your midget is five?”

Kikyo shook her head. “No, she’s still four.”

“Oh, so, he doesn’t even know that he’s got a daughter?” Inuyasha asked incredulously. She had been waiting for a man that she had no clue what happened to him for five years? That was devotion. He did not think people like her existed.

“He’s vaguely aware that we have a child,” she replied. She had not been very far along when he figured out that she was pregnant, but he knew she was pregnant and that was probably all he knew. She imagined when he finally turned up, he would be surprised to find she was no longer pregnant since pregnancy itself baffled him and Rin, so lively and tall, was theirs.

“Well, I hope he comes back. A kid deserves a mother and a father,” the silver-haired hanyou commented.

Kikyo nodded in agreement. “Too bad life doesn’t always go the way it should,” she muttered.

“Hey, I could be her father,” Inuyasha volunteered suddenly. He liked the brat well enough and she did deserve a father. He would not mind helping to raise her.

Kikyo glanced at him. “You?” she asked in a skeptical tone that he missed. He also did not catch onto the fact that she had a look in her eyes that was sort of calling him crazy.

“Sure,” he replied confidently, puffing out his chest a bit.

“Would you even know where to begin?” she asked him to humor him. He was not ready to be a parent. He was too immature. Besides, she was content to wait for Sesshomaru, even if it took another five years, another ten years, another twenty years. She would wait until she died.

Inuyasha thought on being a father for a moment. “How hard could it be?” he countered with a nonchalant shrug.

“I think I’ll just wait for her real father as I have been doing,” she replied.

Inuyasha was probably the only male on the planet that would verbally offer to be a child’s father because he liked roughhousing with the kid, but he had no clue what a father did. She did not think he did such a thing because he was stupid, but he was just impulsive. He did things spur-of-the-moment without weighing anything out.

“Yeah, well, you could do that, too,” the half-demon agreed with a shrug. He did not seem offended by her response.

Kikyo smiled a bit. It was the first time that he had seen her look amused without Rin being around. After that night, she stopped moving away from him if he sat down next to her. She even initiated a few conversations with him.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Sesshomaru gets a clue while Kikyo and Inuyasha get close… maybe a little too close.


	10. License to hold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

10: License to hold

Sesshomaru could hardly close his eyes without seeing _her_ face; that pale visage with those sullen, yet lovely dark brown eyes. _She’s beautiful_ , a voice in the back of his mind always pointed out in case he did not know. But, he was not stupid, so he was very aware of her loveliness.

He still could not recall who she was, but something inside of him claimed her as his. A growl of a voice inside of him always claimed her. He had come to understand it was his inner demon, a more primitive part of himself that he kept in check extremely well compared to other demons. But, his inner demon now demanded he find her, along with whatever force had compelled him in the first place.

He wondered who that woman was and why his inner demon claimed her so fervently. She had to be the person he lusted after. When he saw her face, it sparked a number of feelings within him; a strong urge to have her underneath him was one of them. Moaning that he was certain was her echoed through his mind and made fire dance on his nerves.

He was curious about her in ways he doubted he had ever or would ever be about another being. He wanted to know how she physically felt, how she tasted, and how she smelled. He wanted her to know that she belonged to him. How odd, he thought because he could not even remember her name yet he wanted so much from her.

“This woman moves me without me even knowing who she is,” he growled. It should bother him. She had power over him, but he could not stop searching for her, even if he wanted to. There was no way he would survive this itch, this pull, this tearing inside of him if he abandoned his quest, even if he did not know what the quest was exactly.

 _Where is she_ , the fallen angel asked himself for the millionth time. He wished he could find her if only to sate his curiosity. He wondered if he was headed toward her or if he had accidentally passed her by. The world was such a huge place and he knew he had been wandering for a long time, but he did not know it had been years. A part of him considered he had to have passed her by because of the length of time he had been walking, but his inner demon seemed to know he would never pass her. He could not have possibly come across her yet or he would have been very aware of her.

“What are you to me, woman?” Sesshomaru pondered, eyes wandering the landscape as he continued moving. His brows furrowed slight as the thoughts clouded his mind.

The silver-haired male’s thoughts were thrown off as he came to a gorge. The cliff was not what had his attention, nor did the hundred foot drop. He smelled and sensed ancient life. He smelled something that had been around when the planet was little more than a barren rock. Before the Garden was blue and green, the life had been there and seen everything grow. He caught the scent of a dragon.

Sesshomaru would have continued on his way, just accepting that he was aware of a dragon’s presence and thinking nothing of it ever again. But, the dragon shot up out of the canyon. The ancient reptile bore two heads and growled menacingly as it caught sight of Sesshomaru and his toad servant. Jaken yelped in fright when he first saw the dragon. He knew that he was no match for a dragon, especially one so enormous.

“Hmm… what’s this that we have?” the right head wondered aloud, eyeing Sesshomaru more than his servant.

“Just a couple of vermin,” the left head decided, which set Jaken off. After all, he might not be able to take a dragon, but surely his master would be able to teach that double-headed lizard a thing or two.

“How dare you talk about my great master like that?” the toad demanded in his loudest voice, waving his two-headed staff in the direction of the massive beast. It was as if he planned to do something about the creature, even though he quite was powerless against the dragon and they all knew that.

Sesshomaru paid the cold-blooded creatures no mind. His brain was working and he was interested in that. He knew about dragons for some reason, even though it seemed to be his first time meeting up with one. He was just aware that dragons were the first beings to have physical bodies among all creatures. They were the first to inhabit the planet, but they did not inherit the Garden. They were not willing to till the land, but many of them had been more than willing to fertilize the land and assist the humans in tending to the Garden. They would bring the rain that was necessary to make rivers flood and make the land worth farming and able to bring in crops. Other dragons, well, were dubbed “antisocial.” _Why do I know these things, but nothing about me?_

It felt like Sesshomaru had seen those things he knew about dragons, like he lived through them, but he could not remember if he had. He grunted in frustration, his mouth twitching with the noise. No matter what he did, he just could not recollect anything important about himself. No matter how much ground he covered or foes he vanquished, it seemed like he was no closer to knowing who he was now compared to when he woke up that day in the woods. It was infuriating.

“A dog and a frog,” the right head commented with a laugh, throwing off the demon’s thoughts.

“You’re in my way,” Sesshomaru pointed out in his usual disinterested tone.

The dragon heads chuckled as if the fallen angel had told a great joke. “His way,” the left head laughed.

“His way,” the right head echoed just because it was funnier the more that they heard it.

Jaken took offense to such blatant disrespect. “You can’t laugh at my master!” he declared heatedly, waving his staff again. It almost seemed like he was ready to take them on for his master now.

Sesshomaru did not say anything. He flexed his claws and then leaped at the dragon. They stopped laughing as he launched himself at the right head. The heads breathed fire and the bright orange flames easily engulfed the platinum-haired demon. The dragon would have laughed at the foolish demon for trying to take them on if their mouths were not busy at the moment.

“Master!” Jaken wailed as if he was the one that was caught in the fire.

The dragon ceased the column of fire, thinking that they cooked Sesshomaru fairly well. But, as soon as the flame halted, Sesshomaru was still coming at them. He sliced clean through the right head with an ease that no one expected. The dragon heads gasped in unison while Jaken gawked in disbelief. They were all in shock, and awe, of Sesshomaru’s abilities. The demon landed behind the dragon as the right head slid clean off of its neck and hit the ground, bringing up enough dust from the canyon floor for them to see. The left head visibly trembled for a few moments.

“No regular demon could do such a thing,” the left head muttered in disbelief. What the hell was that platinum-haired creature?

“I never claimed to be a regular demon,” Sesshomaru commented coolly. He would never consider himself regular.

“Are you a fallen angel?” the dragon asked while trying his best to control the fear that was racing through him. Not many things frightened dragons, but a fallen angel could challenge a dragon’s power, even overcome a dragon depending on what level of angel the demon used to be.

Sesshomaru turned his attention to dragon and faced the creature. It seemed that he might be able to learn something from the irksome lizard. _Am I a fallen angel?_ He did not recall, but something inside of him knew the Fall was always disorientating. It was worse for some than others. There were those who fell and remembered bits of their lives, but others never regained knowledge of their true selves. Perhaps, he had been an angel that fell and that was why he would not recall anything before waking up in the forest. But, he could not see himself being an angel, not from what he knew of angels. _And why do I know of angels?_

“What do you know of fallen angels?” Sesshomaru demanded in a very calm tone while flexing his bloody claws for the dragon to get the idea that he would not ask twice.

“Angels that have sinned by developing wills of their own to end up here as demons,” the dragon replied hastily. He did not want to give the demon a reason to cut him down as he had done his brother.

“And?” Sesshomaru pressed.

“And?” the dragon echoed because he did not understand the question.

“You asked if I was one,” the demon pointed out. He wanted to know why the dragon would ask him such a thing, believing it would help him figure out what he was since his mind was failing him.

“Because of your power. It is beyond that of any earth-born demons,” the reptile answered.

Sesshomaru did not respond. _If I am a fallen angel, it would explain quite a bit_. It would explain his power, his lack of memory, and the fact that despite not remembering things, he still knew things that it seemed that he should not. For some reason, a huge part of him agreed with that logic and that he was a fallen angel, but he could not remember why he might have fallen. He also still could not see himself as an angel, but then again he could only come up with a vague image of what an angel was and what an angel did. The image that he was coming up did not fit with him. It did not fit a lot of angels he used to know either, but then again, he did not know that at the moment.

“So, are you?” the dragon inquired.

“I don’t have to answer to you,” Sesshomaru replied coldly before turning his back to the reptile.

The demon decided to continue on his way since it seemed that the dragon had nothing else to offer him. The dragon seemed prepared to do the wise thing and not attack the demon when his back was to him, but that moment was short-lived. He did not enjoy being made the fool of, even if it was by a fallen angel. The lizard shot out at the regal-looking demon with its mouth wide open, planning to devour Sesshomaru in one bite.

Jaken gasped when he noticed what was about to happen. He seriously thought his master would be eaten whole. Sesshomaru calmly turned around at the last possible moment and lashed out with his energy whip at a phenomenal speed. He cut the dragon into several pieces with finesse and a few snaps of his wrist. The top half of the head landed next to Sesshomaru.

The golden-eyed demon did not seem to care how easily he had dispatched the dragon. He instinctively knew a dragon would be trouble for most other demons, but they were nothing to him. He was aware that killing a dragon would almost always be child’s play for him before he had even done it, despite the fact that that was his first time slaying a dragon.

Jaken was nearly left behind once more because he was busy gawking at the diced dragon. He could not believe how amazingly powerful his master was. He had never heard of anyone destroying a dragon so effortlessly. And then, he realized Sesshomaru was leaving him behind. He yelped and ran after the much taller demon.

“Wait for me, master!” Jaken wailed while attempting to find away across the canyon. He spied a bridge that was almost a speck in the distance. He made a mad dash for it, crying for his master all the way.

Sesshomaru, of course, did not pay the little imp any attention and continued on. His mind was too preoccupied wondering if it was possible that he was a fallen angel. It would explain why he had woken up in a forest with no knowledge of his past, considering that he knew in the fall, angels were dumped wherever and their minds were almost completely clouded. It seemed like a very familiar concept, as if he had discussed the issue of being a fallen angel before. He continued to think on it, to explore the vast wasteland that his mind had become and he hoped that soon he would have some answers. He made sure to drown out much of Jaken’s miserable screaming in that time.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo and Inuyasha wandered the village. Inuyasha acted like he was her bodyguard, keeping big, bad Onigumo away. It was a little laughable to her. She had tried to protest to his behavior, swearing that she could take care of herself, but that never seemed to reach him. She hated to think that as a half-dog demon, he had grown possessive of her, even though all evidence was starting to point directly to that.

The people of the village were more scornful toward Kikyo now that she strolled around with Inuyasha. Of course, they never considered he was following her around and she actually resented it. Kikyo never requested the hanyou accompany her anywhere. She did not fear Onigumo or any other villager. She would go where she pleased and if anyone challenged that, she would not back down and she refused to be conquered in any way, shape, or form. Inuyasha would not allow things to come to that it would seem. If anybody approached Kikyo in a menacing way, or just a manner that offended Inuyasha, the half-demon planned to just cut the person down. He made sure to glare at people, just for good measure.

Inuyasha was not in favor of his own behavior, even though he was making sure nothing happened to the woman that fed him. Deep down, he knew there was more to it than that and he did not understand why he was so attached to Kikyo. He never really liked humans and she was a human, therefore, he should not like her. But, he behaved differently toward her than he did with any other human, even though she was rude and ungrateful, so he did not see why he went out of his way for her.

The hanyou rationalized his behavior by telling himself he was protecting his meal ticket when he thought about the situation. Kikyo provided him with food on the daily basis, so of course he did not want anything to happen to her. A voice in the back of his head did like to point out that he had eaten just fine before he met Kikyo, but he typically ignored that voice. He did not see the point that it was trying to make.

There was another, minor fact as to why he was trying to protect Kikyo that Inuyasha would recognize and that was Rin. He thought he should look out for a single mother just so that Rin did not end up an orphan. He would help Rin out by making sure no one harmed her mother. After all, he knew what it was like growing up without parents and being hated for no reason. He just did not like to think of that latter reason much because it would mean that he was somewhat nice and he disliked being seen as “nice.”

“What are we doing here, anyway?” Inuyasha huffed in annoyance. He hated coming into the village with all of the smelly humans; yes, humans were smelly in his nose’s opinion. It did not help matters that the villagers were unfriendly toward him.

“Delivering medicine,” Kikyo answered, making sure to keep her cool. He was always bothered with coming into the village and yet, he followed her there every time she went. She did not understand him at all.

“Another damn charity case. Why do you even help these people? They hate your fucking guts. You need to let them go into the damn forest and pick herbs themselves since they swear they’re so damn great. Let ‘em fight off a couple of freaking demons and see how much they like it,” he stated with a snort. The way the villagers treated Kikyo was another reason that he disliked going into town.

“If I can help, I should,” she replied plainly. She doubted he would understand, even if she explained herself in full detail.

“Why? Nobody would help you if you needed it,” he spoke the truth. He had been around long enough to notice that people treated her as if she were almost a demon. He wondered what was wrong with them to think there was something wrong with her. _Humans are fucking weird and Kikyo helps prove this almost all the damn time_.

Kikyo shrugged since she could not call him a liar on that one. She knew all too well that no one would help her if she needed it considering the times they left her to Onigumo’s whims and that they would not assist her in delivering her baby. Still, she helped where she could and she did still have to barter with villagers. They all needed food and Rin still needed clothes.

Inuyasha continued on since he seemed to have the upper hand in conversation for once. “So, you should leave them to rot until they learn to stop treating you like fucking garbage,” he remarked.

People cleared the street when Kikyo came through, which Inuyasha knew they would do if a demon walked through their town. It was like she had a disease they did not wish to catch by being too close to her. The villagers whispered horrible things about her as she passed, usually loud enough for her to hear because they were confident she would not do anything about their words. They often refused to supply her with the essentials for life, even though they knew that she had a small child at home. Kikyo probably would have been better off if she was a demon, he considered. At least then people would respect her out of fear and give her whatever she needed and wanted.

Inuyasha was not too sure why Kikyo was treated like such an outcast. After all, she was a very helpful and compassionate miko. He gathered that she being an unwed mother helped people shun her, but there was more to it than that and he could not put his finger on it. They just seemed to hold animosity toward her, yet they were still bold enough to request her help whenever they required it. _And Kikyo’s stupid enough to help_ , Inuyasha thought; that was the thing that always amazed him. Humans, he just did not understand anything about them.

The half-demon was upset about coming into the village with Kikyo, too, because he had to hear the things that they whispered about her. He even heard the stuff she did not hear; his ears were not shaped like a dog’s just for the cuteness factor alone. People spoke about Kikyo as if she were the worst kind of woman. He heard her often referred to as “the whore,” like it was her name. He heard men talking what they would do with her if she would give them the chance or if they were just alone with her. The only thing that kept him from attacking them was that he had to stay by her side to make sure no fools actually tried to rape her like that bastard Onigumo.

Thanks to his ears, Inuyasha found out that the women of the village were more vicious toward Kikyo than the men. They made it seem like Kikyo was the lone sinner in a village of saints. Now, he did not know everyone around, but he was pretty sure there were a lot of women of questionable virtue amongst them. While the women might not have any plans to rape Kikyo, they wished some of the worst things on her, things that he had not heard bitter enemies wish on someone, all because the men lusted after her. _Envy is actually disgusting_.

The people also spoke about Kikyo’s little angel, which was her nickname for Rin. They talked about Rin as if she was some kind of animal, or worse some kind of monster. He could see why she never brought Rin into town. The people seemed to be so hateful toward the little girl that they never even met that they probably would have attempted to harm her in some way the moment that they saw her.

“Hey, look at that,” Inuyasha said and he pointed to a doll on a market stand.

“And?” Kikyo asked. She hoped Inuyasha was not showing a new side of himself because if he was, he needed to keep it to himself.

“Rin would like it,” he informed her in a “duh” kind of voice.

Kikyo looked at the toy for a moment and sort of conceded. “Perhaps.”

“So, let’s get it. A brat needs toys,” he reasoned. Rin had nothing to play with outside of the soul collectors and anything that she fashioned into a toy with materials she found in the forest. She needed a decent plaything that was not his ears.

“We have no money and he wouldn’t sell it to us if we did,” she pointed out while casting a short glance at the vendor behind the stand.

“Yeah?” Inuyasha asked as if he did not know and he started to walk over to the stand. Kikyo followed him in case he was planning something stupid and she found it was a good thing that she went with him. “Hey, give us the doll,” the half-demon ordered the merchant, who flinched.

“Inuyasha,” Kikyo soundly scolded him for such antisocial behavior.

“What?” he snorted in an irked tone.

“Come along,” she commanded, as if he was a little boy.

“What the fuck? Let’s get the toy,” he argued while motioning to the doll with his hand.

Her response was absolute. “No.”

Inuyasha huffed again, but he went off with Kikyo, leaving the merchant untouched. The half-demon did not understand why she did not just let him take the doll. He bet Rin would have liked it and she needed toys. He just wanted the brat to have something. _Is it so wrong for the kid to have things?_ He did not see what was so wrong with that. But, obviously, Kikyo did not feel the same way.

“What’s wrong with taking a doll for the brat from some guy anyway?” the hanyou asked in a gruff tone to let her know he was upset with her stopping him.

“It’s called stealing,” Kikyo answered the obvious.

Inuyasha balked for a second. “So what?”

“I won’t be involved in or condone any criminal activity.”

“Feh,” he said and he rolled his golden eyes in a dismissive manner. She was such a wholesome, goody-goody. He could only wonder how she got into the situation that she was just entrenched in. _Who the hell managed to break through her thick-as-a-wall shell to get close to her and have a damn kid?_

-8-8-8-8-

Inuyasha came and parked himself next to Kikyo, who sat outside at night once again. She leaned against the house and watched the sky. She looked his way just to acknowledge him, but nothing more. He glanced at her a few times, but he did not say anything. He had been thinking about how he acted with her and he conceded that he liked her.

There was not much to dislike about Kikyo, in his opinion. She could cook, was kindhearted, and she was pretty. Those were good things in his opinion; practically the most important things when it came to a woman as far as he was concerned. Plus, he liked her company. He got along with her very well now, despite their differences in opinions, so he yielded to himself and silently admitted that he liked her. Because of that, he was willing to try something just a little risky, emotionally and more important physically. What he had in mind could cost him an arm.

The half-demon eased his arm around his hostess’ shoulders. Kikyo looked at him, but he looked away, acting like nothing was abnormal between them. He considered his actions might get him yelled at in the least and purified at most, but he had to take a risk just to see what the consequences would be. She surprised the hell out of him because she leaned into him and sighed slightly, a content sound.

 _It feels so good to be held_ , Kikyo thought as she pressed herself into the solid form near her. It was like being a fuzzy dream. The world was a blur and her body managed to relax for the first time in years.

 _It feels good to be appreciated_ , Inuyasha thought. Maybe they should stick together and they could continue to make each other feel good, they both dared to consider. They could ease each other’s loneliness. It would not be so bad. They liked being around each other, after all.

Inuyasha turned back to look at Kikyo. He leaned down and gently pressed his lips to hers. Kikyo hardly hesitated in returning the sweet embrace.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru stopped walking and snarled from deep in his throat. Tension tore through him and he flexed his claws, cracking his knuckles. Something was wrong and he could feel it biting at him, tearing at him. He was not sure what it was, but he knew he did not like it. He felt even more of urgency to get to wherever he was going. While he still did not know where that was, he knew he had to get there quickly. So, he started walking faster and, of course, Jaken whined about being left behind.

“Master!”

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: What happens between Inuyasha and Kikyo? Is she really going to fall for him? Well, what about Sesshomaru then?


	11. Hang on to your love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

11: Hang on to your love

Kikyo realized what she had done only after it was over and done with. She had just kissed a man that was not Sesshomaru. It was Inuyasha. She immediately felt horrible, guilty, and almost sick to her stomach for having done such a vile thing. And it was vile because it was so very wrong. It was vile because she had not only betrayed her love, but herself, too. _Am I so easy?_

“Goodnight, Inuyasha,” the dark-haired priestess said rather curtly while climbing to her feet. She walked into her home as quickly as possible.

“Kikyo,” Inuyasha called to her, but she did not answer him.

Inuyasha growled in fury, glaring at her house. _Stupid, teasing bitch_ , he thought with a huff. He had half a mind to storm into her hut and drag her back outside to talk. And they would be talking if she was lucky! He did not follow through on that thought, though.

The half-demon took off into the forest, not trusting himself near Kikyo or Rin because of his anger. He really thought they connected and that they had a chance to be together, but she seemed hell bent on waiting for a guy that he was certain would never come back for her. He was upset with her for being so stupid. _She’s a fucking idiot!_

He was willing to bet that the bastard that she waited for had probably shacked up with some other bitch somewhere else. He was probably not even thinking about Kikyo or Rin. He probably even had another family with his other bitch. Kikyo was probably pining over some loser, he figured. She wanted a guy that obviously would not be there for her because he was not there for her. The guy probably never cared for her. _She’s such a silly bitch_ , Inuyasha thought with a huff.

Kikyo could sense Inuyasha leaving, fleeing more than likely, she thought. She was both glad and sadden by the fact that he was gone. Temptation left with him, even though she obviously was not going to give into temptation… yet anyway. She could not help fearing she might actually give in one day. She longed for adult companionship, but then again just any male would not do. She wanted the father of her child, her lover in every sense of the word. She wanted Sesshomaru and no one else. She suspected Inuyasha would not take such news well and that was what saddened her.

“He doesn’t even come close,” she muttered, shaking her head. Inuyasha was a good friend, but he would never compare to her beloved.

The priestess doubted Inuyasha would return after being rejected. It did not seem like something he would be able to deal with, in her opinion. She preferred that he left anyway, so she could avoid the temptation his presence would continue to bring. She had enjoyed his company, but he obviously wanted more and she just could not give him. _No, I am not that easy_ , she promised herself. Sesshomaru was the only man for her and he would always be the only man for her.

She sighed as she settled down onto her pallet, careful not to wake up her resting daughter. _It is best that Inuyasha leave, anyway_ , Kikyo silently assured herself. Yes, it was best and then she noticed light snoring that wafted through the small house. The sounds made her think of the one big down side to Inuyasha not being around anymore.

“Rin will be upset that he’s gone, though,” Kikyo muttered. She was not sure how she would explain his departure to her daughter. She frowned. “What have I done, my angel?”

Rin liked having a friend so much, especially one that would talk with her. Rin considered the soul collectors like friends, even though they were more like pets. Inuyasha was just much better company than the supernatural creatures could be and Kikyo was a bit upset with herself for ruining that her daughter. She wished she could apologize, but she doubted that would ever earn her forgiveness from Rin for losing her only real friend.

The miko looked down at her child, who slept next to her. She reached down to caress Rin’s hair for no reason other than to touch her little angel. How she hoped Sesshomaru would return to them soon. Their daughter deserved a father and he had wanted to be one rather badly. It would not be fair in denying them, she believed. They had not done anything so terrible. No one had been hurt and Rin had not even been alive.

“We merely loved each other, loved each other deeply,” Kikyo sighed.

They had a child like any other couple in love and they just wanted to raise their child to be a productive member of the world. They had not done anything wrong that she could see, so why had he been taken from her? _We did not do anything wrong_ , she silently lamented, doing her best to hold in tears. Yet, he had been taken from her and their child all the same. It was enough to lead her to believe that there was no justice in the world.

“Why is it always the worst?” she wondered. What had they done so wrong?

-8-8-8-8-

Kagura watched Kikyo as she slept. Kagura was still captivated by the priestess and her daughter because it that no matter what they did, their auras remained untainted. She watched them and they did not do anything that struck her as sinful, so she could understand why they were quite pure. She could not understand how Rin was just about the purest creature that she had ever witnessed. The girl had no maliciousness in her at all, even though she was rather rambunctious. Kagura could hardly believe the child was actually the offspring of an angel.

The ruby-eyed guardian angel figured maybe the sins of the parents did not fall onto the child because Rin was just like any other small child. Most children remained untainted until they were about five or six and then some of them started being devilish without the innocent nature that might have been behind their pranks. Some of them however could hold onto their innocence well into double digits. Rin seemed to be just any other small child. Any mischief she got into was due to being a child and not some monster.

Kagura had witnessed Kikyo’s little slip with Inuyasha. She was not surprised Kikyo had given in. After all, she was all alone and hurting for her lover to be returned to her. She had to long for company. The angel noted long ago that humans wanted company almost more than anything else, even if they did not realize it. She had been surprised when Kikyo had pulled away from Inuyasha and allowed him to leave, not even trying to go after him. Apparently, any company would not do for the chocolate-eyed priestess.

“How long is she willing to wait for him, though?” Kagura could not help wondering. Was Kikyo really willing to sit and wait for five more years? Ten more years? Until she died? Would she hold on so long for Sesshomaru? Kagura almost found herself wondering why.

The lengths that Kikyo would go to repent for what she looked at as a betrayal surprised the guardian angel. The miko decided to go on a thirty day fast and she sat in a cold stream for a few hours every night while praying, mediating, and silently begging to be forgiven for her poor actions. The thing that caught Kagura’s attention was that the act had not even been counted as a sin.

“Is this whole she’s managed to hold onto her soul’s purity for so long? She atones immediately she feels she’d done wrong?” Kagura shrugged, even though she barely had shoulders in her current form. “I suppose it makes sense. It’s amazing she looks at this as a sin, though.”

The act had merely been a mistake and a mistake was different from a sin. A sin was a calculated act of wrongdoing. Mistakes were not calculated, even though they could turn into sins if a person did not look to correct the mistake. Kikyo’s mistake had not been transformed into a sin because she did penance for it, way more than necessary, and she had not clung to Inuyasha while knowing that she wanted Sesshomaru. It was interesting to Kagura to watch a human make a mistake that she looked at as a sin and trying to get forgiveness for that, but refusing to seek forgiveness for her actual sins, which she was very aware were sins, but refused to acknowledge them as sins.

“I’m never going to get this woman,” Kagura sighed, referring to Kikyo. She shook her head. Kikyo just did not make any sense.

-8-8-8-8-

“Mommy, where’s Inuyasha?” Rin asked innocently, looking up at her mother as she spoke. They were walking through the woods because Rin wanted to pick flowers.

It had been days since the incident between Inuyasha and Kikyo. As the miko suspected, he had run off and probably would never come back. He had not returned since then. She did not even sense him lurking around.

“He’s gone, angel,” Kikyo replied, feeling her stomach turn. The priestess felt horrible for her actions with Inuyasha because she felt that she had driven him away and her daughter really liked him. She wished he had remained and tried to deal with everything just for Rin’s sake. She knew she would have definitely dealt with everything if it meant her daughter could keep a friend and be happy.

“When’s he coming back?” Rin inquired with a bright smile.

“I don’t think he is,” Kikyo answered honestly, caressing the top of Rin’s head. She could not lie to her baby, even if the truth might hurt her feelings somewhat.

“Why not? He’s fun having around,” the child declared as they got to their destination. She charged into the meadow and started scanning for flowers to pluck. She was very picky about the ones that she would gather.

Kikyo watched her daughter with a small smile on her face. “I know, angel.” Rin was so small that she almost disappeared in patches of tall grass.

“Didn’t he like it here?” the child asked as she found her first choice blossom. It was followed with a second pick right next to it.

“He did,” Kikyo assured her daughter. _He liked it a bit too much and maybe I liked him a bit too much_.

Rin was puzzled by that answer and it showed in her deep brown eyes. Her little forehead wrinkled as her eyebrows drew closer together. “So, why he’s not coming back?”

“That’s something that you have to ask him,” the priestess answered. She could only speculate. She was not completely sure why he had decided to not come back. They could have talked things out and worked out their friendship. Maybe he did not want to see her anymore because he was angry with her, maybe he could not deal with the rejection, or maybe he only wanted her and when he saw he could not have here, there was no reason to stay around. There were many possibilities.

Rin pouted and stopped her activity of flower picking. She ran over to her mother and hugged her around the legs, which was a sure sign that she was upset with the news. She silently cried into her mother’s hakama. She was obviously crushed that Inuyasha had left, even though she did not say anything. Kikyo bent down and embraced her weeping child, hoping to bring her some comfort.

“He doesn’t like us no more?” Rin asked through her tears. She sniffled a bit after the question.

“He still likes us,” Kikyo replied sincerely. Well, she was not so sure that Inuyasha still liked her, but she was certain that he still liked Rin.

“Then why’d he leave? I didn’t want him to go!” the child bawled, tears steadily streaming down her tanned, chubby cheek.

“I know, angel, but sometimes, people can’t help leaving. Sometimes, they have other things they need to take care of. I know you feel bad, but you know that Inuyasha wouldn’t leave unless it was important. Don’t cry, okay, angel,” Kikyo pled while gently rubbing the girl’s back.

The priestess felt like her heart shattered in her chest. She could not stand to see her daughter in tears, especially since she believed it was all her fault. She had led Inuyasha on and then she had rejected him. She had driven him away and that act had made her child heartbroken. _Perhaps, I am just a sinner_ , she considered. _A filthy, heartless sinner_.

“I want Inuyasha to come back!” Rin wailed. She hiccupped at the end of that proclamation.

“I know, angel. I know,” Kikyo said in a low tone while pressing her little girl closer to her, trying to assure the child that everything would be all right. Rin rested her head on her mother’s shoulder and continued to weep.

The miko considered for a moment that maybe she should have just given into Inuyasha. She liked him well enough and perhaps that could grow into love. It would have kept him around and Rin would not be so overwrought at the moment. But, she only considered such a thing for a brief second.

It would have been wrong had she given into Inuyasha for a number of reasons. The main reason was that she would have just been using Inuyasha and she just could not have done that the half-demon. She liked and respected him too much to do that. He deserved so much more than she could ever offer. She would have never grown to love him and he deserved someone that would truly love him. Her heart and soul belonged to only one person and she would wait for him always and forever if necessary. She just wished Rin was not hurt in the process.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo stood outside as the sun finished setting. Her daughter had already gone to sleep. Inuyasha had been gone for a couple of weeks already, but Rin was still distressed over his absence. The child had not been running around as much as she used to, preferring to sleep more than anything else now. The little girl sometimes just stared out into the woods as if she were waiting for him to run out of the trees and join them for breakfast or dinner as he used to do. He had not come back yet and Kikyo doubted that he ever would.

Part of her dared to wonder if she was foolish for waiting for Sesshomaru. It had been years, after all. She did not listen to that part of her because she knew he was the only man that would do for her Inuyasha had been the one that let her know with certainty that Sesshomaru was the only man for her because no matter how much she liked Inuyasha, she was aware that she could never love him. If she could never love Inuyasha, then she could not love any man, she reasoned, except for Sesshomaru and he was out here somewhere. She was sure of it.

“I miss you, Sesshomaru,” Kikyo informed the night air.

Kagura watched the priestess from the sky. She could not believe the devotion of Kikyo to Sesshomaru. The same could be said of Sesshomaru now that she thought about it. She watched him, wanting to know what he was up to while Kikyo waited, and his determination was just as strange as Kikyo’s devotion. Sesshomaru had been placed on the globe as far from Kikyo as possible without putting him in an ocean or on the top of a mountain. He could not even remember who she was to him, yet he marched on, going toward her, always going toward her. Kagura had never seen anything like it and she watched because she doubted she ever would witness something like it again.

Now, Kagura, who had dealt with humans more closely than most other angels, had seen a couple of humans seriously in love. She once had a charge that died trying to make it back to his lover after a war and his soul actually finished the journey, so it was not the determination that stunned her. It was the fact that Sesshomaru was the one with such emotional determination. That woman, that human, actually meant something to him, whether he knew it or not. She meant so much to him that he could not even remember who she was, but he was trying his best to get to her. His feelings were obviously beyond lust, which Kagura also did not understand.

Angels were not creatures built for emotions and when they began developing them, the emotions tended to be simple. It might have been a way to avoid driving angels stark, raving mad when they were going through the change. Angels did not usually evolve ambiguous emotions. It was not apart of their nature.

In fact, angels tended to succumb to the seven deadly sins and nothing more than that when it came to feelings. Kagura was not sure why that was, but from what she knew, angels just collapsed to the greed, lust, envy, wrathfulness, pride, and gluttony of existing. It was possibly due to the fact that they just did not know how to manage the feelings and did not know what to do when they appeared, but Sesshomaru had not faltered to his lust.

Sesshomaru kept moving to get back to Kikyo and it was not lust driving him. It was a want to be with her, near her, and to make sure that she was all right. He could not even recall her name, but he kept going toward her. He did not even know that was why he was moving. He just knew that he had to keep going. He was going somewhere important and he believed it he would know when he got there.

Sesshomaru never even asked himself where he was going. He asked where she was, but nothing beyond that as far as destinations went. He kept walking, changing direction whenever an instinct inside of him told him to do so. He trusted himself to get wherever he needed to be and he would get there eventually. The one bad thing was that he had no sense of time, so he had no clue as to how long he had been traveling and he did not care. It did not occur to him that the person that he was going to might care about the time, though.

Kagura wondered if Sesshomaru’s sin had evolved into a virtue. Had his lust transformed into love? _What if he had already been in love and that’s why the human isn’t tainted?_ She had never heard of an angel being in love, but the way that he was moving, she thought that he might be the first angel to fall in love. Was that it? If given enough time, would an angel be able to turn sin into virtue? Or had his sin actually already been a virtue? She was not sure.

The guardian angel liked to think that sins could not turn into virtues because if they could, she did not think angels that sinned got a fair deal. Angels that sinned were judged so quickly and harshly they usually did not get a chance to see if they were going to do something beyond their sins. From what she could tell with Sesshomaru, he was either a fluke or angels should be allowed more time to prove their intentions beyond the sins. She then shook those thoughts away, considering that they might be inappropriate.

-8-8-8-8-

Sighing, Kikyo’s eyes went to the sky as sat outside the house, late at night. “Sesshomaru, I would wait for you forever if I could, but could you just give me some sign that you’re out there?” she wondered, losing herself in that endless black sea sprinkled with bright diamonds. It was such a soothing sight.

Yes, it had been five years and she had no problem with the idea of waiting longer. She just hoped that he did not show up when she was an old woman. She hoped he showed up before their child was an adult. Most of all, she hoped that he showed up point blank. She was distracted from the sky as she sensed motion in the hut long before her daughter wandered out to join her.

Rin flopped down into her mother’s lap and curled up against Kikyo’s chest, holding onto her mother’s arm with one hand and sucking the thumb of her free hand. Kikyo smiled a bit and pulled the digit from her child’s mouth. Rin whined a bit, but she did not put the thumb back in her. This had been a little dance of theirs since Rin was about a year old. Kikyo hoped by the time her child turned five, then they would stop having this little contest. They were both quiet for a few long, almost tense seconds.

“Mommy,” Rin whispered as if she was afraid speaking louder would chase the night away.

“Yes, baby?” Kikyo asked in a very low voice, in case her child fell asleep during the discussion.

“Tell me a story,” the girl requested with a yawn. She rubbed her eye with her tiny fist before clutching her mother’s collar.

“But, it’s too dark to read,” the priestess pointed out. She read her daughter stories, but she had no practice in telling tall tales.

“Tell me a story,” Rin said again. Obviously, a person had to be four years old to know that a book was not necessary for a story, Kikyo thought.

Kikyo thought on it for a moment. _How do stories typically start? Oh, right_. “Once upon a time…” Kikyo began and wondered where she would go from there. “… there was an angel. He was a beautiful sight…”

“How can a man be beautiful?” Rin asked curiously. She was used to hearing females described as beautiful. All the men in stories, typically heroes, were called “handsome.”

“Because he was an angel.”

“Are all angels beautiful?” the child inquired.

“Well, I’ve only seen two, but the two I’ve seen are beautiful,” Kikyo replied while caressing her daughter’s head.

Rin was now very intrigued. “Am I one of the angels you’ve seen, Mommy?” she asked, pointing to herself, in case her mother did not know who she meant it seemed.

“Of course, angel,” she answered and leaned down to kiss her child’s forehead.

“And who was the other one?” Rin asked.

Kikyo would have thought that was obvious, even to a toddler. But, she guessed not. Aside from her baby, the only other angel she had seen was the child’s father. She had not seen Kagura, even though she had looked directly at her as far as the guardian angel had been concerned. She had only sensed where Kagura was and knew to focus on that space. She knew what she was sensing, but still had not seen Kagura.

“Your father was an angel,” Kikyo told her daughter.

“My father?” Rin echoed. She did not think too much about her father because he was not there. Much of the time, she just thought that her mother had her alone without any help. Like her mother laid an egg to have her or something else just as fantastic. She assumed it was possible since birds laid eggs, but still, thanks to lessons from her mother, she knew even birds had a mommy bird and a daddy bird.

“Yes, your father. He was a very beautiful angel,” the priestess assured her child. She did not get to tell Rin about her father very often because the girl did not seem very curious about him, so he did not really come up in conversations. Rin usually asked about her father if such a parent was mentioned in a story that her mother was reading to her or if she saw a family of animals in the forest.

“Where’s my father, Mommy?” the little girl asked.

Her mother was honest. “I don’t know, angel.”

“Huh?” Rin scrunched up her face, confused by that.

The child did not understand how her mother could not know something. Her mother was the omniscient presence in her life, so she thought that whenever she had a question, her mother would have the answer. Generally, Kikyo did have the answer, but her baby’s questions were usually not so difficult.

“How come you dunno?” Rin asked.

“Well, he just disappeared one day,” Kikyo answered.

“Why?”

“I don’t know.”

“Is he coming home one day?”

“I hope so,” the miko answered honestly.

“What’s he like?” the girl asked.

Kikyo thought on the question as she adjusted her daughter in her arms. “He was a very quiet angel. He enjoyed being around me. Sometimes, he spent the whole day just being around me.”

“He liked you a lot, huh?”

“Yes,” the dark-haired maiden confirmed. He had never said so, but he did like spending time around her. He enjoyed holding her, even when he could not truly hold her. There were times when she sensed him and it was like he was wrapped all around her. He spent as much time with her as possible whether he was visible or not, whether he could touch her or not, whether he could speak to her or not. He was just there.

“Why’d he leave you if he liked you?” Rin asked, sounding perplexed and a little sleepy.

“I don’t think he had a choice,” Kikyo answered, running her fingers through Rin’s hair. The touch made Rin’s eyes droop just a little more.

“If he comes home, will he play with me?”

“We’ll have to wait and see.”

“I’d like that,” Rin admitted.

“I know, angel. I would, too,” Kikyo said while hugging her daughter to her. The little girl sighed contently because of the contact.

Kikyo desperately wanted Rin to meet Sesshomaru. She wanted him to be a father to their child because she remembered how the notion of being such a thing fascinated him. Their daughter deserved a good father, too. She knew Sesshomaru would like to see that they produced such a darling and daring child without a malevolent bone in her entire make up. Rin was nothing like what the offspring of an angel. She was like an anti-monster and Sesshomaru deserved to see that.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Sesshomaru comes into a village that seems very familiar, even though he is certain that he has not been there. Kikyo fights a powerful demon and is critically injured. Will she survive? Will he make to her?


	12. Never as good as the first time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

12: Never as good as the first time

Sesshomaru stopped and looked around to see where he was. Something seemed familiar about the place, even though it had that general look that he felt the whole world seemed to carry. Still, there was something about that one area that triggered something in his mind. It was not a memory or anything, but his mind was nagging at him now.

The fallen angel considered that he might have traveled in a circle. He scanned around the area, nothing looked particularly familiar. In other words, nothing really stood out to him. He wondered why the place seemed familiar to him, but did not look that way. He was puzzled, but decided to press on and figure out what was going on.

The regal-looking demon calmly traveled down the well-worn dirt road with the feeling that there was something about the place that he knew. He continued to look around and try to figure out why things seemed so familiar to him. It appeared like any other human inhabited area, but he could feel something different about the place that he just could not put his finger out. It was like a buzz hummed through the air, dancing right under his skin and teasing each of his senses. He glanced around, seeing the usual humans cowering at the sight of him. They were always so frightened of demons, he always noted.

But then again, Sesshomaru figured if he thought on it long enough, he could understand the humans’ problem with demons. Humans seemed to be very weak creatures, not even capable of stopping low-level demons more than likely. It could not help that many demons seemed ornery. No way an ordinary human could defeat a demon itching for a battle.

But, humans and demons alike seemed weak to him. Most humans seemed to be just smart enough to realize that it was better to run than to fight with him while demons just threw themselves at him. It was so foolish, he always thought.

And then suddenly a large red ball bounced into Sesshomaru’s path, which through off his thoughts and caused him to halt. He seemed almost puzzled by the sudden appearance of the object. A small child ran out after the toy as his mother cried out as he left her side to retrieve the ball. He charged out onto the road, stopping right in front of Sesshomaru. Staring with wide eyes, the boy seemed to be awed by the tall, elegant demon. The golden-eyed demon stared coldly down at the child, who was still stared back with his large brown eyes full of childish innocence.

“Little knave, you dare block my master’s path!” Jaken shouted in a fury as he raised his staff, planning to strike the boy with the wooden weapon. The child looked terror-stricken by the notion of the toad possibly hitting him.

“Jaken,” Sesshomaru said; he said the name like he was just breathing it out.

“Master?” the imp asked in a bemused voice. He was not sure if he should turn his furious gaze from the child to look at his master or if he should continue to just glare at the boy, so in his indecision he just looked nervous.

“Walk around him,” Sesshomaru ordered.

Jaken was not sure if he heard right since he noticed that Sesshomaru never walked around anyone. “Master?” the imp said while turning to look at his master in confusion.

“Walk around him,” the taller demon repeated in much more impatient tone and he strolled around the child. His servant did the same.

As soon as the demon went by, the boy’s mother dashed out over to him and hugged him tightly. She obviously thought the worse was going to happen and she was very glad that nothing occurred. Sesshomaru glanced back at the pair without stopping. There was something about mothers and children that captivated him and he did not understand why that was. They caused a weird sensation to run through him that he did not comprehend. _They’re just humans_ , he told himself, but there was a huge part of him that did not buy that. He wondered if his fascination could be explained by something in his lost memory.

In the dark trenches of his mind, Sesshomaru could vaguely recall a pale smiling face as he touched her flat abdomen. A puzzling feeling washed over him, like he did not comprehend why he would remember something like that. But, the memory was accompanied by a calm, almost soothing sensation. So, he was aware the memory was important.

There were so many things he knew were important, but he could not recollect what they were entirely. Everything was in pieces. Sometimes, they had sensations with them like this memory, but that did not help. Nothing fit together. Some of his mind was still blank to make things worse. Sometimes, he felt that he should just count himself lucky for knowing who he was.

“Master, why did lower yourself and walk around that pathetic human?” Jaken inquired. He had seen Sesshomaru slay dozens on humans just for standing in his way. But, then again, none of those humans had been children.

The platinum-haired demon did not answer. He did not owe that little toad any answers or explanations for why he did anything. He continued on his way. He also continued to look around for something that he knew since that familiar sensation did not leave him yet. There had to be some reason that the place seemed so familiar, but still nothing caught his golden eye. He could not help wondering what was going on.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo watched Rin play in the stream that was close to their home. It was a very humid day and the raven-haired priestess wished that she could frolic so carelessly in the cool water like her daughter was doing. The child splashed her mother a few times, which Kikyo was actually thankful for, even though she pretended otherwise. She just could not find it in herself go along with the silliness, though.

Kikyo held in a laugh. “Please, angel. Cease your attack.” She feigned, putting her hands up had defeated her.

Rin giggled and wet her mother a couple more times before she then moved on, wading deeper into the stream. The girl was having a good time in the knee deep, slow-moving, clear water. Well, it was knee deep for a four-year-old anyway. She appeared to be trying to catch a fish that was not looking to cooperate with that operation, or so her continuous dives into the water suggested. She giggled each time her hands splashed down into the water, even though she had nothing to show for her effort. As long as she had fun, then her mother was happy, not that her joy showed on her face.

“Mommy, look!” Rin laughed as she nearly caught a large fish, but it jumped out of her grasp. Kikyo smiled a bit while watching the fish wiggle around for a fraction of a second before splashing back into the water. “I almost had it!” Rin laughed some more.

“Yes, you did almost have it.” Kikyo knew her daughter did not really want to catch the fish anyway.

Rin was only about the harmless chase because it gave her something to do. Catching a fish, bird, rodent, insect, or whatever other prey she might be after would mean that the game was over and, like any other child, Rin did not want the game to end. Rin could hardly watch her mother catch fish. The first time she saw it, Rin refused to eat fish for a month.

“Mommy, look at those!” Rin pointed up into the sky as a large flock of birds flew over their heads. Her face showed great awe, almost like she never saw birds before. It was just impressive to see them in such big numbers.

“I see them,” Kikyo assured her daughter as she looked up to see the flocks. She then tensed up and her eyes narrowed as she turned to look to her left. “Angel, go hide,” she commanded her child.

“Mommy—” Rin was going to protest because she was having fun in the water and she did not want to leave the cool stream.

“Now.” Kikyo’s voice was firm.

Rin did not argue since she was accustomed to being ordered to hide if they were out in the open and someone or something was approaching. She was not sure why she had to hide, but she never questioned her mother’s commands. She ran to the closest lush bush and dived into the plant, making sure she was out of sight, while her mother climbed to her feet.

Kikyo glanced back at her daughter’s hiding place to make sure that her baby was secure and that it was a good place for her to be hiding; the child was completely out of sight. The miko then focused ahead of her. She drew an arrow from her quiver, just in case. She watched as a young teenage boy fell through the woods toward her.

“Lady Kikyo,” the boy said while trying to catch his breath and keep his balance. He leaned his hands on his knees while huffing and puffing, sweat was dripping off of his forehead thanks to the heat.

Kikyo placed her arrow back with the others, knowing the boy was not a threat now. Whenever she was addressed as formally as she just was, it meant that the village people required her services in some way. How odd to be a necessary outcast. She was like an executioner, someone the people agreed was needed, but to be avoided at all times. She would not mind so much if only she was not sure they were a possible threat to her baby.

“What’s wrong?” Kikyo asked while lowering her weapon. Her stance did not relax at all, which was normal for her. She would be tensed until she knew her baby was safe, so that boy needed to get going soon.

“There’s a demon headed toward the village!” the boy reported in a panic.

She nodded to show that she understood. “I’ll be right there.”

The boy knew Kikyo would not move until he was out of sight, which he was correct about. She stayed standing where she was until that boy was gone because she wanted to make sure the coast was clear and secure for her child. She then turned her attention to Rin, who crawled out of her hiding place.

Rin had to hide because people from the village, usually children, came looking for her to make fun of her or to do more malicious things. Kikyo feared someone might try to harm her baby from the way that people talked about the child in town. The priestess was not willing to chance anything happening to Rin, so she always told her daughter to hide when people were nearby.

“Mommy, are you leaving?” Rin inquired with a little pout. She did not like it when her mommy left because she liked having her mother around at all times. She was a four-year-old little girl, after all.

“Only for a moment,” Kikyo replied, knowing that her daughter did not want her to leave. She wished she could stay with Rin all of the time and watch her play, but she felt she should help if it was needed. She hoped Rin saw this and grew up the same way.

“But, what about the water?” the girl asked, still pouting something fierce.

“As soon as I come back, you can go back to playing in the water. For now, let’s go back to the house,” Kikyo ordered.

Rin pouted more, but she went to her mother and did not say anything more about the water. Kikyo lifted her daughter into her arms and carried the child back to the house. She left her child with a couple of soul collectors behind to protect Rin. She then started toward the village with a quick pace to see the demon they were all so worried about.

The priestess hoped it was not a false alarm. She hated being dragged away from her daughter for no reason at all. The villagers panicked easily when it came to demons and sometimes they would run to her even for the smallest, most harmless demons. A few times, she did not even have to purify the demons, only give them directions because they were lost and they did not want to start any trouble. In fact, some of the larger demons tended to be searching for some place and just needed directions on how to get there. She had no problem with resolving things peacefully if she could do such a thing. She wished the villagers tried it every once in a while.

The ebony-haired miko entered the village and scanned around the town for the demon. The people had cleared out, seeking safety and it seemed to be the wise thing to do. She could sense a powerful demonic aura. She stared ahead of her, toward the main road. There was a demon approaching from there. And then suddenly an apparition bowled out from the left, ruining several homes and merchant stands.

Kikyo had to leap back to avoid getting hit by the raining debris. She turned her attention to the attacking demon. It was monstrous with a head shaped like a giant monitor lizard, but it was standing on two legs. She would have thought that it was a dragon, but its flesh appeared to be more like tar than scales, even dripping off its long lizard-like body like fresh mud. The creature was the size of a large tree and it was bulky like a ship. It then spread wings that were located on its back; they were shaped like bat’s wings. The wings were also covered in the tar-looking flesh.

“What is that thing?” Kikyo wondered because she had never seen a demon like it. She could sense that it had a demonic aura, so she was certain that it was a demon, but she still had never seen anything like it.

The priestess armed her bow with an arrow since she was fairly certain the rowdy beast did not come in peace, especially considering the way it wrecked those homes. She shot at the creature, which turned sharply and breathed a column of fire at the approaching projectile. The miko watched in disbelief as the flame destroyed her arrow. The demon growled and turned its attention to the audacious woman that dared to shoot at it.

The creature growled in fury while Kikyo armed another arrow in her bow. She shot at the apparition again as it slashed at her with its long, thick claws. She managed to dodge the attack just in time. The demon moved to avoid getting hit by the purifying missile, but some of the spiritual energy surrounding the arrow connected with the monster. The beast roared much like a pained dragon, but louder and at such a high pitch that the vibrations shattered items and splintered wood.

Kikyo did not have time to be awed or worried by the painful screech. She worked quickly, trying to load another arrow into place on her bow while the demon was distracted by the agony of the purifying magic. The creature seemed to know her plan and spit flames at her to buy it some time to get over the agony of the magic. Kikyo had to dive out of the way to avoid being cooked. _Apparently, the villagers had a reason to be alarmed by this demon. Hopefully, I don’t have too much cause to be alarmed_.

The monster roared again while swiping at Kikyo with its long talons. She grunted as she fell back to dodge getting her torso sliced open. She finally aimed her bow and took a rapid shot at the demon. The arrow grazed the creature again, clearly making it angry. It roared again and spit more fire at the priestess. Kikyo stumbled back, the fire just missing her again.

The demon roared, revealing a mouth full of four-inch long teeth that looked sharper than any blade. It snapped at Kikyo with its mighty jaws, attempting to make a meal of her or at least injure her badly. She moved out of the way swiftly, foiling the monster’s plans. She pulled another arrow out and fired at it as the thing roared again. She hoped to nail it right in its big mouth and end the battle. Unfortunately, the beast breathed more fire and destroyed the missile. The pale priestess had to move to be missed the flames and that was when monster took another swipe at her.

Kikyo cried out in pain as the claws connected with her side, tearing her clothing and flesh with ease; it felt like magma ripped through her body. Her blood gushed forth, painting the ground scarlet. She put her hand to her side while falling back, but remaining on her feet, her sandals digging into the dust. Her legs wobbled some, but she willed herself to stay standing. She began breathing heavily now; the physical strain on her body was getting to her. She eyed the beast with determination, though.

The demon noted it had her blood on its talons and it licked the crimson liquid from its hand. It seemed to savor the taste and licked its lips. The beast turned its attention back to her. Apparently, it now had a taste for the petite miko and it seemed to want more.

The chocolate-eyed priestess had little desire to become the snack of a demon that she could not even identify. She stumbled, but made sure not to fall over. She moved her hand from her wounded side since she needed both hands to do battle. She drew another arrow from her back and armed her bow. The demon raised its claws again and roared. Kikyo fired as the monster brought its talons down.

Kikyo only stared in shock since she knew she would never be able to move in time as the claws connected with her arm and shoulder, tearing into her skin again, searing her like a lava-covered sword. She screamed in agony as the wound was inflected upon her. She fell to the ground as her arrow ripped through the top of the demon’s head. The purifying projectile took off most of the demon’s head and the creature collapsed second afterwards. Its blood stained the ground almost black while its flesh oozed off, mixing with its onyx-colored life force.

Kikyo stared at the defeated beast for just a moment while forcing herself to remain conscious. Then started back toward her home; she did have to get back to her baby. The townspeople could handle the clean up.

-8-8-8-8-

“Another demon,” a merchant gasped as he ducked behind his stand as Sesshomaru entered town.

The golden-eyed demon ignored the frightened human. There was a strange scent hanging around in the village. He smelled blood, but not just human blood, which would make sense to him in a human town. There was a rank stench mixed in with that human blood. He followed that raw odor because he was curious to see what could create such a revolting mephitis.

Sesshomaru stared around the area where the smell was the strongest. It was also the space with the most damage in the town. He ignored all of the movement going on around him because of the nervous humans. Whatever was there before was gone now. He imagined that it had to be quite the foul beast considering the disgusting, near-vomit-inducing smell it left on the town. He then noticed a blood stained white cloth. He picked up the scarlet-covered rag and sniffed it.

“I know this scent,” he muttered to himself in amazement. The very aroma sent him into a delightful spiral for a moment before he regained control of himself. He looked around, hoping to spot the owner of the cloth.

“Master?” Jaken said because Sesshomaru was not moving anywhere. He also thought that his master was acting quite weird by smelling a cloth that had human blood on it.

The golden-eyed fallen angel decided he would follow his nose to the owner of the cloth because from the smell of things, the person was bleeding badly. He started toward the outskirts of the village, much to the people’s delight and also their horror. The demon was going into the woods, but he was also going toward their protector, who was badly injured at the moment and they were well aware of that.

The people were torn on what they should do. Should they go aid Kikyo and keep that demon from attacking her? Or should they just leave her alone as they always did? Well, one person reasoned and then voiced his opinion that if they did go to Kikyo’s aid and were able to take on the obviously powerful demon that was going to her then they did not need Kikyo in the first place. But, if they were to go and help, only to find that they were no match for the demon, then they would all be slaughtered. It did not make sense for them to all die. It was obviously the wise decision to stay behind and leave Kikyo to fend for herself. Everyone that heard that logic agreed, so no one left the town.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo had parked herself outside of her house. She rested against the outside wall of the little hut. She eyes were halfway closed because she was rather tired, but she was not ready to sleep yet. Her entire torso was covered in a thick layer of bandages, which would need to be changed soon as she was sweating quite a bit.

She had her legs folded and Rin nested on her legs, curled up in her lap and on the verge of taking a nap. The mother stroked the girl’s scalp to keep her calm and hopefully help her fall asleep. Rin had understandably burst into hysterics when her mother had returned to the house bruised, bloody, and her clothing torn to bits. Kikyo had assured her daughter that she was fine, but from the way that she felt at the moment, she might have lied to her child.

The cuts were not so bad. Yes, they were somewhat deep, but they were cleaned, bandaged, and the bleeding had finally stopped. It was something that might have come along with the cuts that she had not banked on that was making her consider that she might not be as fine as she swore that she was.

The miko could feel her body temperature steadily rising, so she was beginning to suspect she had been poisoned along with slashed. She was not sure what type of poison that unidentified demon might have put into her system, but it was there. It did not make anything particularly painful, but her breathing was labored and she sweating. Her exhaustion might have something to do with the poisoning, too, even though it could just as easily be chalked up to the fact that she had a tough battle with that foul demon. She figured as soon as Rin was soundly sleeping, she would go and try to prepare a remedy of some kind. With luck, she would be able to do it in time. And then, she was drawn from her thoughts by an approaching demonic aura.

Kikyo frowned deeply because she was in no shape to contend with another powerful demon. But, that did not matter, she told herself. She would have to make due, though because she had her child to protect. She definitely would not allow anyone or thing harm her little angel.

“Rin,” Kikyo said in a low, calm tone.

“Yes, Mommy?” the child asked with a small yawn.

“Go in the house.”

Rin climbed off of her mother and went to the house as she was commanded to do. Kikyo used her bow as a crutch to help her stand up. She then armed her bow, fully intent on shooting first and asking questions later because she did not want to take any chances. As the owner of the demonic aura came into view, she fired the projectile without even getting a good look at the approaching creature. The demon, though, caught the arrow and melted it in his grip as if it was nothing. He growled slightly because of the attack as he stepped into view.

“Sesshomaru….” Kikyo gasped when she saw the platinum-haired former angel. It really was him. Sesshomaru had returned.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Sesshomaru and Kikyo are finally together again. Everything should finally be all right, right?


	13. Crying everyone’s tears

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

13: Crying everyone’s tears

Kikyo was breathless, and it was not because she was almost certain that she had been poisoned by a demon that she fought with earlier in the day. _He_ was there, standing before. The father of her child stood before her. The person that she had waited five long years for stood right in front of her. The person that she loved with all of her heart and soul and she swore that the feeling was returned. So, why was he looking at her with such cold, unrecognizing golden eyes? Well, possibly because she had just shot a sacred arrow at him and he did not appreciate such an action more than likely.

“You filthy wench! How dare you attack my master?” Jaken demanded in an outraged tone as he pushed his way through the brush to confront the foolhardy human, in his opinion anyway. She paid him no mind, even though he waved his staff in a threatening manner.

“Jaken,” Sesshomaru said in his usual cool, unfeeling tone.

“Master, let me handle this upstart wench,” the toad requested while pointing his staff in the miko’s direction. He planned to take her down without mercy for such disrespect toward his master.

“Stand down,” the taller demon commanded.

“But, master, you don’t have to lower yourself by taking on this human,” Jaken objected, thinking that his master would take on the pathetic priestess. The little demon was certain he could teach the upstart woman a lesson and his master did not have to soil his hands with her filthy blood.

“Jaken,” Sesshomaru growled. His follower was starting to work his nerves.

The toad gulped as his master stepped forward. “You’re going to get it now!” the servant informed Kikyo.

The golden-eyed male stood before the injured miko. He stared down at her, as if he did not know her, she noted. He reached up a hand and caressed her soft cheek. She pressed herself into his hand and was on the verge of tears of joy. She wanted to thank whatever divine forces there were that he was finally with her again.

“Sesshomaru…” Kikyo said as a couple of tears escaped her eyes and trailed down her cheeks. The tears touched his hand and he almost felt like they transferred her feelings to him. He was close to being overcome with emotion, which he did not understand.

“Why are you crying?” the platinum-haired demon inquired in a low, almost tender tone. He was not sure why he sounded almost caring toward her. _Do I care for this human? Why would I care for this human?_

“It’s been five years. I didn’t know what happened for five years,” she replied and then she stumbled a bit.

“Kikyo,” he said with concern because of the way that she had just unexpectedly dipped. He did not have time to realize he knew her name.

The priestess fainted before she could say anything further and landed against Sesshomaru. The fallen angel caught her instinctively. He tenderly collected her into his arms and could not shake the feeling that holding her felt… right. He carefully carried her into the house only a few feet away. That was when he noticed another scent, a very strange scent. He did not even get a chance to look around the small house before he met the owner of that odd aroma.

“Mommy?” Rin said when she noticed her unconscious mother. She ran over to the unfamiliar demon. “What happened to my mommy?” the girl asked in a panicked tone while she stared down at her mother.

“She’ll be fine. She’s just tired,” he assured the child, speaking in his usual tone, but there was something soothing about it.

“She looked tired,” Rin mused aloud, nodding. She had noticed her mother eyes had been drooping just a bit earlier, like she was sleepy. Well, she felt somewhat relieved that there was nothing really wrong with her mother and the older female was getting the rest that she obviously needed. But, there seemed to be more to it than that, so Rin was still a bit anxious about her mother’s condition.

“Then we should allow her to sleep,” Sesshomaru informed the little girl as he placed Kikyo down on her pallet.

The golden-eyed demon studied the unconscious woman. He could smell a poison coursing through her veins and he guessed that was why she had fainted. Rin came over to him from the side, leaning over to see her mother. He glanced at the child, realizing that it was the closest that he had ever been to a human as far as he could remember. He also noted she was not afraid of him, which he guessed had to do with her overriding concern for her mother.

“She gonna be okay?” the little girl asked. It seemed that she could sense something was not right despite the fact that the stranger made it seem as if her mother was only harmlessly resting.

“She will,” Sesshomaru promised, which earned him a little nod from the girl. She seemed to believe him, which pleased him. He did not know why that was.

Rin felt much better about her mother’s condition now that she had gotten the stranger’s word that her mother would be all right. She was not sure why that was, but she did not even think about it. Rin just went with her instincts and those told her that she could trust the tall demon to care for her mother. She did not need to worry and so, she did not.

“Master, why are you helping these humans?” Jaken inquired, entering the house. He was a bit put off by the atmosphere, probably because it was the dwelling of a priestess. He could practically feel spiritual energy bouncing off of the walls, threatening to destroy him. She was probably a powerful priestess, he thought, because of the almost overwhelming feeling of her home.

“Oh, froggie!” Rin grinned when she turned to see Jaken.

The child dashed over to the newcomer, who she was taller than and that delighted her. She had never met someone that she was taller than since she was only four. She picked him up like doll and giggled merrily while hugging him tightly.

“Don’t touch me!” Jaken commanded while flailing in her arms with the hope that he would be able to wiggle away. In a moment, he figured he would just bash the child in the head with his staff if she did not obey his commands.

“Silence, Jaken,” Sesshomaru ordered. Part of him was glad that girl was no longer fretting over her mother and if holding Jaken would keep her that way, she could strangle the little toad for all he cared.

“But, master—” the servant attempted to protest because he was rather indignant with having to be the plaything for a human brat. But, he did not make it through that as his master cut him off.

“Let her be,” the silver-haired male stated plainly, his tone ordering that he not be argued with.

Jaken whimpered as Rin continued to pester him with childish curiosity. Sesshomaru, seemingly pleased to hear Rin laughing, turned his attention back to Kikyo. He figured the demon that he smelled back in town had been the one to injure her; it would explain why her blood was at the scene. A protective anger washed over him like a cold shower and if he was not so sure that she had slain that demon, he would go hunt it down and slaughter it mercilessly. He was not sure why he felt that way, though.

Somehow, Sesshomaru knew he could save Kikyo from the toxins that were in her body, so she would not have to be in any more pain and she could avoid getting sick, maybe even avoid dying. He had never even considered he might be able to use any of his powers to heal or save a life, but he knew he had such power and he had to use it or he was more than aware he would never forgive himself. Something inside of him told him that she was very precious to him, even if he could recall who she was or why she was so important to him.

“Don’t worry. I will not allow another thing to harm you while I’m around,” he vowed in a low voice before he got to work healing her.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru sat down next to Kikyo’s bed with his back against the wall. He glanced down at Kikyo, who was now really resting peacefully. Her breathing was even and she was not sweating anymore. She had not moved in her sleep at all, which let Sesshomaru know that she was fine. Rin trotted over to the tall demon, seeming to be done with tormenting Jaken, at least for the moment. She grinned up at him, which earned her his attention.

“Your ears like mine,” Rin informed the demon while moving her hair for him to see the pointed tips of her little ears.

Sesshomaru arched a curious eyebrow. The child appeared to be a demon, but her blood smelled nothing like a demon’s blood. Her blood did not have the aroma of a human’s blood either, but she had called Kikyo “mommy.” She did smell like Kikyo’s offspring, so he believed the child was her biological daughter. There was something else about the girl’s scent that was peculiar, but he could not put his finger on it.

“My name’s Rin,” she introduced herself, continuing to smile brightly. She pressed her hand to her chest, just so he knew she was talking about herself.

“Stop bothering my master,” Jaken ordered the girl, who he believed was just about the worst behaved child that he had ever encountered, not that he had much experience with small children.

“Who are you?” Rin asked the taller demon with a warm smile. She ignored Jaken, as if he was not even there. It was a bit amusing to the fallen angel because she ignored the little imp in the same way that he would.

“Sesshomaru,” he replied.

Jaken was in complete and utter shock because his master had never bothered to introduce himself to him, yet he had so easily given his name to that pitiful little human. The demon toad sulked, maybe trying to gain attention or he was genuinely hurt. It did not matter since his master and the child did not pay him any mind.

“Do you know my mommy?” Rin asked, pointing down to the sleeping miko. She noted that he seemed concerned for her mother’s wellbeing.

“I think I do,” Sesshomaru answered honestly.

The demon could not recall how he knew Kikyo, but he knew her. It was one of the few things that he was certain of. He had used her name, her face was so familiar, and he was almost certain that he knew her scent. When he picked her up and held her to him, it felt like something he had done before. He felt something odd for her and his inner demon whispered that she belonged to him. He ignored his inner demon as usual. But, he still could not shake the feeling that Kikyo was someone very special to him. There was something about her. Maybe she would be able to explain it.

“Mister Sesshomaru,” Rin said, shifting uncomfortably for a couple of seconds on the balls of her feet.

“Yes?” he replied.

“Is my mommy gonna wake up soon?” the child inquired with some concern. Her face scrunched up as she spoke. She was not accustomed to being up while her mother was sleeping, but there was more to her discomfort than that.

“I doubt it. She’s very tired. Why?” he countered curiously. He understood that children were dependent upon their mothers, but she seemed like a capable little girl. She should be able to get along without her mother for a few hours, he thought.

“Um…” Rin pouted and she put her little hand on her tummy. “I’m just hungry,” she informed him. She had not eaten yet and it was close to their usual suppertime.

Sesshomaru nodded slightly, showing he understood. “Jaken,” he called in an even tone.

“Yes, master?” the toad replied in a hopeful voice. He was glad he to be of some assistance to his master.

“Bring Rin food,” the taller demon commanded without even looking at smaller demon.

Jaken was taken back by that order and his face was incredulous. He was almost certain he had heard wrong. “Huh?”

“Now.”

“But, master, I don’t know what a human eats,” Jaken objected. He was rather offended by the very idea of fetching something for a tiny wench anyway.

“Ask her,” Sesshomaru told his servant as if the goblin was an idiot.

Jaken could not believe that he was being made into an errand boy for a filthy, evil miniature human. Rin informed the smaller demon that she liked fish very much. He grumbled and went to fetch her some fish, even though he had little clue on how to catch a fish or how to cook fish. He figured he would need to figure it out before he ended up angering his master. Rin sat down next to Sesshomaru once Jaken was gone. She grinned up at him, but he did not look down at her.

“I like your clothes,” Rin commented, which earned her a glance from the stoic demon, but nothing more. The chocolate-eyed child was not deterred. Thanks to Inuyasha, she was used to having to deal with hard-shelled individuals. “My mommy was gonna make soup for dinner. I like soup. Do you like soup?” she asked.

“I’ve never had it,” he answered because he could tell that she was intent on talking to him whether he responded or not.

“Well, my mommy can make it for us tomorrow. Well, if she feels better, anyway,” Rin stated. She was not used to her mother not being able to do anything, but she knew the woman needed rest sometimes and she was all right with her mother getting a well-deserved break. Unlike most children, Rin had a keen idea that the world did not rotate around her.

Sesshomaru nodded. He then asked something that he wondered about just from being in the house for a while. “You live here alone with your mother?” he inquired. He only smelled the two scents of Kikyo and Rin inside the place.

“Yes, sir,” Rin answered very honestly. She did not think anything of him being a stranger and she would freely respond to anything that he asked in earnest if she could because that was the way she was.

Sesshomaru nodded again. He felt like he had been in the tiny house before, several times in fact. But, he did not remember a little doe-eyed, adorable girl being there. He could see images of Kikyo sleeping in the house, or preparing dinner for one around the house, or cleaning around the place, or just waking up. He could see those things clearly, but he just could not place the child, even though a part of him felt he should know her.

“You know, I’m an angel,” Rin informed the guest out of the blue. She thought he might open up a bit more if she revealed things about herself and she was proud of the fact that she was an angel.

“Are you?” he asked, humoring her. The proclamation did not seem as farfetched to him as it should have, he believed. He did not have a problem humoring the child, though because she was pretty much a baby and harmless.

“Yup. My daddy’s an angel, too,” she told him.

“Is he? And where is your father?” he inquired. He did not smell a male presence in the house at all. It seemed that males, human or demon, did not even visit the house, at least not recently. _It’s wise for them to stay away now_. He was not sure where that thought came from.

Rin scrunched up her face. “I dunno.”

Sesshomaru was more interested in the subject than he would admit to himself, but sounded it by continuing his questions. “You don’t know where your father is?” he asked, sounding almost curious. _Why should I care?_ He did not know why, but he did.

“Nah-uh,” she answered, shaking her head for emphasis.

“Your mother hasn’t told you?” His eyes drifted to the sleeping priestess.

“She dunno either. He might be in Heaven. I mean, he’s an angel,” she reasoned with a grin. She would bet her daddy was in Heaven just like an angel was supposed to be. “I’d like to see my daddy, but I’m glad I don’t live in Heaven. I like living with my mommy. But, my daddy might like Heaven.”

“I suppose,” he yielded. He considered the girl’s father probably died and her mother told the child that he was an angel to comfort her.

“Where’s your father?” Rin asked.

Sesshomaru was a bit thrown by the question because he did not see it coming. “I don’t have one,” he replied.

“Oh. What about your mommy?” she inquired. She could understand not having a father because she did not really have one.

“I don’t have one,” he replied again. He did not have any parents as far as he knew.

“No mommy?” Rin gasped in sheer terror, putting her tiny hands over her mouth. Her whole body froze. It was like he said the most frightening thing that she had ever heard. How had he lived without a mommy? She did not have any clue because it seemed impossible to her mind to live without a mother. But, he had to be an amazing fellow as she did not know what she would do if she did not have her mommy.

“No,” he plainly assured her.

“What do ya do with no mommy? Who makes you breakfast or reads you stories or kisses you goodnight? Who cuddles you when you have nightmares? Who kisses your boo-boos better? Who makes sure the ghosts don’t get you in the dark?” the child inquired and she was quite serious with all of her questions, which he thought was a bit amusing.

“I’m not scared of the dark,” he stated the obvious. He did not sound haughty to her like he would have speaking to any other person.

“No? My mommy’s not neither. I guess it’s just a big people thing to not be scared,” she commented with an elfish smile.

Sesshomaru almost smiled a bit because of the child. He had no idea that such seeming empty-headedness could be endearing. He also had no idea he could find something cute, but he found himself thinking that about Rin. She was the first creature that he had ever stumbled across that he dared to think of as adorable. He was not sure if it was because he had never truly taken the time to observe children or if it was because she was just that utterly, inexplicably charming. When she smiled at him, he figured it was probably her.

-8-8-8-8-

When Kikyo regained consciousness, she immediately noticed it was dark. She glanced to her right, expecting to see her baby sound asleep next to her, but she did not see anything. She panicked like any mother would and she sat up much too quickly for her exhausted body. She made herself dizzy, unaware of how injured she was. She also aggravated her wounds a bit, which caused her to wince as pain shot through her body.

“Be careful,” Sesshomaru cautioned her. The sound of his voice made Kikyo turn to see him.

“Sesshomaru, where’s Rin?” the priestess inquired, her tone low, but she was demanding such information.

“Right here.” Sesshomaru motioned to his right, where Rin was curled up against him and sound asleep. “I wasn’t sure where to put her. I didn’t see another bed,” he explained. He did not want to Kikyo suspect him of anything because he would never touch a child in any negative sort of manner.

Kikyo breathed a sigh of relief. “She sleeps next to me.”

“All right.”

Sesshomaru gently lifted the child into his arms, making sure not to disturb her sleep, and carried her across the room. He placed her down in the bed with Kikyo. The miko covered their daughter with two blankets that she had on the bed to make sure her little girl would be warm. She then leaned down and kissed the child’s cheek. Rin whimpered in her sleep on contact, but she did not wake up. Kikyo smiled slightly before slowly sitting back up to focus on Sesshomaru now that she did not have to worry about Rin.

“You shouldn’t move so much,” the pale demon told the woman. He was not sure why he said that, but he felt it necessary to point out because he did not wish to see her injure herself further for some reason. He could not figure out why that was.

“I know,” she replied. She supposed his advice showed that he cared. She exhaled slowly as an attempt to ease the agony that she was in. She stared at him for a long moment. “Where have you been?” she asked in a low tone.

“Wandering,” he answered as if it was the most logical response for him to give. He sort of misunderstood her inquiry.

“For five years?” she asked in disbelief, managing to keep the hurt out of her voice. She had been waiting for him, their daughter had been waiting for him and all he could offer up was that he had been wandering. She just could not believe it. _We couldn’t possibly mean so little to him that he wouldn’t come right to us if he were on this plane_.

“Yes,” he answered plainly, nonchalantly. His tone did not go by the miko.

Kikyo was actually speechless for a few seconds. “Are you going to continue to wander?” she asked since he seemed so indifferent toward her and their child.

“Perhaps,” he replied with a slight shrug of one shoulder. His urge to keep moving was rapidly draining from his system, but he did not think anything of that.

“How can you say that?” she demanded in a quiet hiss. She did not wish to wake Rin, but how dare he just casually state that he might leave them again? He was Rin’s father for crying out loud! He had created a baby with her and now he was so easily speaking of leaving again. _My Sesshomaru would not be this callous with me and our child! Is this just some demon that looks like Sesshomaru?_ She knew that was not the case, though.

Sesshomaru glanced over at the outraged priestess in almost lazy manner. When he caught sight of her though, he wished he had turned faster and that he could just openly stare at her. Her pale face was shining almost celestially because of the moonlight that sneaked in through the window. His mind wasted no time in pointing out she was beautiful, even though she was clearly indignant. He could practically see fire in her deep chocolate eyes.

The fallen angel felt compelled to touch angry priestess for some reason, hold her again, and never let her go, but he fought against that impulse. He could not fight away the thought she was the most stunning creature he had ever laid eyes on, though. There was just something about her that was sinking into him and practically tying her to him. _She is everything_.

“I say what I want,” the golden-eyed demon informed her while trying his best to remain completely uncaring toward her.

“Do you mean to say that we mean nothing to you?” Kikyo inquired, swallowing to keep a tremble out of her voice. From the way he acted, she was a bit fearful to hear his response. She ordered herself to remain calm, though.

“Should you?” he countered; his indifferent tone slipped a bit. He actually sounded just a bit bemused because something inside of him told him that he should not be speaking to her in such a manner.

Kikyo appeared completely shocked by the question, incredibly shocked. Wide, tearful brown eyes gaze at him and he actually regretted his riposte when he noted the look on her elegant face. Apparently, she should mean something to him, but he could not figure out what that might be. He wondered who she was to him.

“Kikyo, how do I know you?” he asked curiously, almost imploring her. His voice finally held a bit of warmth toward her. He figured once he knew who she was to him, he would know how to treat her and what to say to her to avoid having to see her look so stunned again.

The raven-haired priestess blinked and appeared bewildered. “What? What do you mean?”

“How do I know you?” he repeated. His face even showed a little confusion.

 _He doesn’t remember me_ , Kikyo realized. He did not recall what happened between them. She was both relieved and upset when she realized he did not know what they were to each other and what they had been through. She was relieved because he was acting so cold not because she did not mean anything to him, but because he did not recollect who she was. She was upset because she had no clue how to get his memory back. _Why does it have to be this way?_

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Sesshomaru can’t remember Kikyo and decides to leave. Well, he tries anyway, but Kikyo won’t let him go that easily it seems.


	14. In heaven’s name, why are you walking away?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.
> 
> A/N: to answer the question on what is the Book of Enoch; it’s one of the ancient texts that just did not make into the bible. It’s a part of the Apocrypha; books that weren’t canonized by the Catholic Church.

14: In heaven’s name, why are you walking away?

Kikyo just learned Sesshomaru did not remember what happened between the two of them. It did hurt her deeply that he had forgotten her, forgotten their child, but she knew it was not his fault. He warned her it might happen. In fact, he was fairly certain if he fell, he would lose his memories. He just told her the memories would probably come back. No such luck; the story of their lives together.

Still, she was wounded to the very core of her soul that her beloved did not know who she was anymore and he did not know what they had anymore. How could he let that all go, even if he had no control over what happened? Just how could he lose all of that?

She recalled that he had once told her that when angels were cast out of the Heavens, they became very disoriented in the Fall. It took angels a long while to regain their complete minds and get their bearings together once they were in the Earth realm. Some were not even fortunate enough to ever regain their total minds because they just gave into other things or stopped caring because they could not stand the wait after a while. She hoped he was not one of the impatient fallen angels.

“Sesshomaru, do you know that you were once an angel?” Kikyo asked, successfully keeping all of the pain inside of her from sipping into her voice. She did not want to give too much away because she doubted it would be healthy for her to just tell him about himself. She just wanted to see if he remembered anything at all about his past before he became a demon. Maybe she could prompt him and that would help his memories.

“An angel?” he echoed in a tone mixed with confusion and disbelief, even though it was not the first time that he had heard such a thing. When he had slain a two-headed dragon, the issue of him being a fallen angel had come up. He had put that out of his head, though because he just could not picture himself as an angel.

“Yes, you were an angel. You were a cherubim,” she informed him. She thought that something would at least sound familiar to him and then things would come flooding back to him, but that did not seem to be the case. She supposed something so simple was just wishful thinking. _It has not been easy for us, after all_.

“One of those big-eyed, childish angels?” he inquired in an almost insulted tone, frowning slightly. There was an indignant look in his golden eyes that she could barely see because it was nighttime.

She almost scoffed at the very idea of his question. “No, of course not. One of the highest order of angels. You were powerful.”

“I _am_ powerful,” he corrected her.

“But, you don’t remember any of this, do you?” she asked with a sigh. She wanted so much to plead with him to remember, but she kept that desire at bay. It just hurt so much to wait all those years for him and now he stood right before her, but did not remember her. It was like losing him all over again. _I’m being punished for loving him, aren’t I?_ It did not matter because she would continue to love him.

“No,” he answered bluntly.

The frank response hit the injured miko like a steel club. She lurched forward slightly, as if she was going to be sick. She regained control over herself, but could not stop the dull ache spreading through her body that had nothing to do with her physical wounds. That one word made it feel like her insides were starting to dissolve as if they had been dipped in acid.

Kikyo was hurt and upset; the emotions were not directed toward her beloved. He had been taken from her, even though he was right there. She would consider it worse if only she did not know for a fact that when he was not there, it was just plain awful; that was like having a million tiny paper-cuts and a million needles in her eyes. Still, him being right there and looking at her and their daughter as if they did not matter, as if they were utter strangers was terrible, too. It was unbelievably painful and cruel in her opinion.

 _Why do these things have to happen to us_ , the priestess wondered. Why could they just not be together and be content like they were before? _We were so happy_. Why did it seem like everything about them crumbled before they had a chance to make the most of it? _We only want to be joy and love to each other_. Why did the Heavens themselves mock them? She doubted she would ever have answers to her questions. It was all just too much for her heart, which was clenching painfully in her chest.

“Try to remember. You were an angel of life and death. You’d take souls from the dying. It was how we first became acquainted. Try to remember,” she implored the pale demon. She knew she was probably not helping, but she needed the father of her child to know who he was. She needed him to come back to her. She needed him to remember them. She needed the pain to end.

Sesshomaru closed his eyes for a moment and attempted to do something he had already tried countless times. He attempted to remember something before waking up in the woods just to get that pleading look out of her chocolate eyes. He was not sure why, but he could not take her looking at him as she was at the moment, like the world was going to come to the end because of him, and he would do anything to get her to stop. But, he saw nothing as usual when he closed his eyes. Everything was still blank from before the moment that he woke up in the forest. He opened his eyes and glanced at her.

“So, who are you to me?” the platinum-haired demon inquired to show that he could not recall a thing.

Kikyo looked away, hoping to hide all of the emotions that she was feeling at the moment. She had to choke back a sob, which hurt her chest. What was she supposed to do if he could not recall anything? She could not force his memory back. She could tell him everything she knew and from the look in his golden eyes, she doubted he would believe a word that she said. She would not tell him anyway. She laughed, but it sounded very much like a sob.

“I’m just someone you used to know,” Kikyo replied in a whisper.

Sesshomaru did not respond, but he was aware he was more than that to her. The look in her cocoa eyes, the change of her scent, the hurt in her voice betrayed her. She was much more than someone that he used to know. Especially with the way that his inner demon continued to claim her and was actually demanded that he take her, but he ignored that barbaric part of his brain as usual. He would not lower himself to lay with a human, even if her face continued to flash through his mind as it was doing. Even if it bothered him because he knew his failings hurt her, but he still would not bring himself to touch a human. _But, this woman is someone to me_.

 _Someone important_. He shook that away because he refused to believe a human could be important to him. _I don’t understand what’s going on, but she can’t be someone to me. Why would she be? But, if she weren’t, would she look at you with such deep emotion?_

“You should get some rest. It would be best for your injuries,” Sesshomaru informed Kikyo. At least it would get her to stop looking at him as she was and it would give him to time to gather himself.

The priestess nodded for lack of a better thing to do. She would not be able to sleep, but she was not doing herself any good by getting worked up. Her body was sore and throbbing enough as it was. She lay back down and stared at her sleeping daughter’s face, _their_ daughter’s face. They had a child and he could not remember. She wanted to weep, but she knew that would not do any good, so she did not bother. She wondered why it seemed like they just could not be together without some kind of pain being involved. _Why does it have to be this way?_

Sesshomaru knew Kikyo was still awake. He could hear it in her heartbeat, which practically pounded in his ears. He was bothered because he upset her. He cursed his brain for not being able to recollect Kikyo. She meant something to him, no matter how much he wanted to deny it, and he was certain of that. But, he could not remember how so.

Part of him continued to scoff it all off, as if a human could mean anything to him, but she meant something to him. He was so sure of that, feeling it deep in his chest, and he truly desired to know just who she was to him, especially if it meant that she would stop looking at him with such sorrowful chocolate eyes. He did not want to upset her.

-8-8-8-8-

As the sun quietly rose, Sesshomaru calmly climbed to his feet. He exited the tiny house with his faithful toad servant right behind him. Kikyo noticed his departure immediately, even though she had been asleep at the time. Her mind just knew he was leaving and that woke her body up. She climbed to her feet and winced because her wounds were still bothering her a great deal. She chased after him; she just had to. He was her beloved and the father of her baby, so of course she had to chase after him, even if he could not recall her or their daughter.

“Sesshomaru, wait!” the petite miko called once she was outside of the house and certain that he would hear her. She was out of breath from such simple movement, but she did not care.

The fallen angel did not turn around to address the priestess. He was going to keep walking, but his brain would not allow it. He sighed, annoyed she had followed him rather than the fact that he could not move while she was concerning herself with him.

“You should be in bed, woman,” the tall demon pointed out with a slight frown marring his smooth face. He was a bit upset with her for coming after him when she needed to think about the damage that was done to her body. He was tempted to carry her over his shoulder back to her bed, but he ignored that urge for now because he thought she might obey his words. He obviously did not know whom he was dealing with.

“Woman?” she echoed in an indignant tone, standing just a little straighter. She had been downgraded from her name to simply being “woman” in a few short hours. _Oh, so he is an arrogant one_. She did not like that very much, but she could take him down off of his high horse.

“Go back to bed,” he ordered, ignoring her resentment.

“You can’t leave,” she argued.

“There is nothing for me here,” he stated.

Sesshomaru had convinced himself last night that the human woman and her strange offspring were none of his concern. His inner demon and some other parts of his brain tried to disagree, but since his inner demon was in on the debate, he chose to ignore those parts. Why would he, a powerful demon, have any ties to a human wench? He might as well continue on his way, he reasoned, even though he no longer felt the urge to move.

Nothing called out to him anymore. He did not even know what direction to go in anymore. His instincts and the wind were no longer talking to him about traveling. Still, he attempted to continue on his way, even if he had no destination.

“Everything here is for you,” Kikyo almost shouted at the hardheaded demon. Her eyes were ablaze with emotion, more sorrow than fury, but he did not face her to see.

She wanted to tell him why he just could not leave, not again. It would not be right. It would not be fair. Their daughter required and deserved a father and she needed his love, needed him. But, without his memory and with his obvious demonic ego, he would have thought she was a raving lunatic more than likely if she started going on about such things. She needed to think of some way to get him to stay, though.

Sesshomaru turned to face the miko because of her tone. She was slumped over slightly, one arm wrapped around her torso. She was in some physical pain; she was also emotionally taxed, but he did not know that. He thought he had gotten all of the poison out of her system and healed the wounds, but it seemed he had not done the great job he had assumed if she was still in pain. She only made things worse by moving around and getting all geared up. The thing was that he did not even know why she was so worked up or why he was concerned over her condition.

“Go back to bed,” the pale demon commanded in a calm tone. He vexed with her for not only disregarding his orders, but because also she was not worried about her health. It was now even more tempting to carry her back to her bed and force her to stay there until she was perfectly fine, but that seemed too much like caring and he told himself that he did not care about her.

“No,” she replied defiantly, raising her chin to him. It was not a word he was accustomed to hearing and he did not like it.

“What?” he practically snarled.

“I won’t go back to bed,” she stated.

“Fine. Your health is not my concern,” he replied, waving her off.

-8-8-8-8-

Kagura happened to decide to check in on Kikyo since she did not have anything better to do with her time. She noticed there was a lot of activity around the hut that was not sparked by the active, little cutie Rin; yes, Kagura thought that Rin was adorable and she liked the child. She thought anyone that was able to resist the elfish quality of the girl was on the same level as Naraku, who of course believed that the girl was just about as loveable as a plague. Although, with the way that he enjoyed human suffering, he probably liked a good plague. In fact, she knew that Naraku was waiting eagerly in the shadows to pass judgment on Rin, as she was pretty much the embodiment of several sins, not that Kagura could tell that from looking at the girl’s soul.

So, the angel cast her ruby eyes out into the action and spotted Kikyo speaking with a man. No, correction, she noticed he was a demon once she glanced at him. No, wait, double correction, not just any demon. Kikyo was speaking with Sesshomaru! _So, that pompous jackass finally made it back to his precious human_ , the guardian angel thought. _Maybe love does conquer all, patience is a virtue, and everything those human fairy tales talk about_ , she considered. _They’ll probably live happily ever after and all of that crap now,_ which made her smile a little. And then she saw Sesshomaru walk away.

“What the hell is he doing?” Kagura wondered out loud.

The ruby-eyed angel went down to get a closer look and hope to find out why that stoic ass was still acting like an ass after he had finally found the reason that he fell. She made sure to stay out of sight, believing it would keep Kikyo from seeing her. She was unaware that the priestess could not see her, but actually sensed her presence, which made hiding pointless. She also had to stay a bit of a distance away to make sure that Sesshomaru did not catch what little scent that he made her aware that she had. _Of all the demons in the freaking world that he could become, he just had to be a damn dog demon_ , she thought.

Kikyo grabbed Sesshomaru by the arm to prevent him from leaving her again. He growled at what he considered disrespect toward him and he almost violently yanked his limb out of her grip. He controlled himself and pulled his arm back with only a little force to teach her to not touch him again. She almost fell over from the force throwing her off balance. She managed to catch herself. Jaken came to his master’s defense after she dared to lay a hand upon the taller demon.

“Insolent human wench! How dare you touch my master!” the little imp shouted angrily and then he struck Kikyo in the side with his staff.

Kikyo was far too injured to even think about blocking the blow that she could see coming. The priestess grunted as the hit landed hard against her weak and wounded body. She stumbled back a little bit, but she managed to stay on her feet through sheer willpower. Panting, she clutched her torso just a little tighter.

Sesshomaru frowned deeply as he smelled the scent of blood filling the air, her blood. Jaken had reopened the cuts on her side and had basically injured her again. Sesshomaru snarled like a mad dog and he grabbed his servant by the head before he even knew what he was doing.

“Did I tell you to hit her?” Sesshomaru demanded, holding Jaken to the point that he let the little demon know he could easily crush Jaken’s skull. His eyes speckled with crimson. He could hardly comprehend the rage that he felt toward the little frog at the moment. It was like his blood was boiling and the color seemed to be leaking into his eyes.

“No… no, master,” Jaken replied in a trembling tone, feeling a disturbing amount of pressure on his little skull. He trembled with fear, having never seen his master so incensed. He hoped his master did not close his hand and crush his head with the ease it seemed Sesshomaru could.

Sesshomaru flung the toad viciously to the stone-covered ground with enough force to seriously hurt the little fool. Jaken grunted as he crashed into the earth, but his master did not even bother to cast him a glance. The silver-haired male then went to Kikyo and helped her to stay on her feet. Amazing, two seconds ago her health was not his concern and now he was angry she was hurt and he was assisting her. The thoughts did not even enter his mind because he was so concerned for her wellbeing. He just knew he had to be there for Kikyo. He had to protect her.

Kagura was relieved to see the action Sesshomaru took in regards to his little miko. For a moment, she thought the idiot fallen angel might have lost interest in his very devoted human. But, it looked like he was still very fascinated with her and her life.

“You’ll go back to bed now,” the regal demon stated as he lifted the priestess into his arms and carried her back to her home. She did not protest.

Sesshomaru placed Kikyo back on the bed and he inspected her side. Blood was seeping through her bandages, causing him to scowl. _Oh, I will throw that stupid little imp to the moon if she is seriously injured_.

“Does it hurt?” he asked, focusing more on her wounds, even though he wanted to look at her face.

“Not much,” she replied in a low tone.

“I’ll fix it for you,” he stated. It was not an offer, but an order and that much was easy to tell from his tone.

“I can do it myself,” she insisted. Since he was not the same Sesshomaru as far as she was concerned, she did not want him seeing her in the way he would need to in order fix her wounds. She was also rather annoyed with him.

“Stop being so stubborn,” he growled the command. If she had just gone back to bed before like he had told her, she would be all right, but she just had to be so obstinate.

“I can do it,” she said once more, but he ignored her this time.

Sesshomaru practically ripped Kikyo’s top off and then cut her out of her bandages without her say so, not caring about her right to privacy obviously. She quickly covered her exposed breasts as soon as the bandages fell from her body. For the brief moment that she was bare to him, Sesshomaru noted that her body looked very familiar to his eyes. He then turned his attention to the open gashes on her side, which were oozing blood like trees oozed sap. He brushed his fingertips against the cuts and almost sighed. There was something about her torso and her skin that beckoned his hands. She winced and that brought him back to the task at hand.

“What are you doing?” the chocolate-eyed female inquired, sounding a bit suspicious of him.

“Hold still,” he commanded in a sharp tone.

Kikyo tried her best to comply, but to be honest, she did not trust Sesshomaru very much without his memory. He seemed to be under the impression that he was just another demon and she did not trust demons; okay, she did not really trust anybody, but that was beside the point. She eyed him cautiously as the wounds on her side disappeared completely. He then turned his attention to the cuts on her shoulder.

“What did this?” Sesshomaru asked in a low tone. He almost sounded as concerned as he actually looked.

“A demon,” Kikyo replied.

“What kind?”

“That is a good question,” she answered.

“You should be more careful. You do have a daughter to look after,” he pointed out as if she did not know that.

“I know,” she muttered with a glare. He was so condescending without his memory.

“What happened to her father, by the way?” he asked, sounding close to intrigued.

“He vanished,” she answered plainly.

“Vanished?” he echoed, almost as if he did not understand.

“Just disappeared.”

“Died?” he guessed.

“No,” she said very plainly.

“Ran away?”

“No.”

“How can you be so certain?” he inquired. He doubted any man cowardly enough to run away from his family would leave a note or something to let her know exactly what happened.

“He’s not that kind of person,” she tried to assure him.

“To die or run away?”

“Both.”

“How can you be so sure?” he asked. He could not comprehend why she would have so much faith in a man to believe that he had not died or ran away when he was no longer there with her. She made it seem like he disappeared right before her eyes because of the confidence that she had in him. He did not understand it, but he was willing to chalk it up to her either being a foolish human or just a foolish woman.

“I know him,” she said soundly. She knew him, but he was now a stranger, too. Why were they being toyed with in such a manner, she wondered with a heavy heart. Why could they not be together without so much trouble? Why could they not just be left alone to be content? _No matter how many times I ask these questions, they will never be answered_.

“You have so much faith in this man? Do you expect him to return to you then?” he inquired to try and understand the small creature before him.

“I do,” she stated with conviction.

“Why?” he asked.

“Because I have faith in him,” she answered and she turned to stare him dead in his golden eyes. “I have so much faith in him,” she informed him with love in her voice that even he could hear, even though the emotion was foreign to him in his opinion. _I have faith that you are in there, my dear Sesshomaru, and if you just stay, I know you will remember and return. After all, you returned physically, so now I just need you here mentally_.

Sesshomaru noticed her eyes were glued to his. He could have been blind and still he would have known that she was staring at him in such an intense way. There was a pleading look in her cocoa eyes, as if she was begging him for something that she could not speak. He knew those eyes. He knew those deep, thoughtful, and beautiful chocolate eyes. He began to lean down without realizing it, as if he was going to kiss her, she believed. He was not sure what he was going to do, but he lips did seem to be getting closer to hers.

“Mommy,” Rin called out as she sat up. She yawned and began rubbing her eyes with her palms.

Kikyo and Sesshomaru quickly parted and turned to pay the tiny child some mind. Kikyo then remembered that she was bare to the world from the waist up. She looked around for her top and found it disregarded a few inches away from her. She grabbed her clothing and placed it on her body before her daughter noticed and started with all sorts of questions.

“Mommy, what’s going on?” Rin asked as she looked up at the adults and noticed her mother fixing her shirt. She did not know what the action might mean, so she did not really think much of it. Her question was more directed toward the fact that she heard talking and that was what finally woke her up. She was not used to the talking and that was weird in her opinion.

“Nothing is going on. Sesshomaru was just helping me see to my injuries,” Kikyo answered as truthfully as she could. She was aware that her daughter would not think anything of that.

“Oh. Can we have soup for breakfast?” the child asked with innocent enthusiasm. She was very much a morning person once she got all of the sleep out of her eyes.

“All right,” her mother concurred with a small smile.

-8-8-8-8-

Rin merrily sipped her breakfast out in front of the house. She had tried very hard to get Sesshomaru to try it, but he did not seem very interested in eating. His only care seemed to be staring at her mother, the girl noted. She did not know why he appeared to like looking at her mother, who was busy repairing some of Rin’s clothes because that girl could tear through her clothes.

Kikyo had decided to mend the clothing because she could see a look in Sesshomaru’s eyes that told her that if she tried to do anything strenuous he would be at her throat again. She had to take things easy anyway. She was not looking to do herself any harm since her daughter needed her to be functional for the most part. So, she would take it easy and heal up.

“So, Mister Sesshomaru, are you going to stay for a little while?” the child asked while licking her lips because of the very tasty breakfast that she was partaking in.

“Maybe,” he replied.

“That’s nice. I like company,” Rin declared with a grin; it was such an angelic expression that he was almost willing to believe that she truly was a cherub.

Sesshomaru nodded for lack of a better thing to do. He planned to stick around the mother and daughter for several reasons. Some of the reasons he would admit to himself and others he would not. One of the reasons he wished to stick around was to make sure that Kikyo took it easy and that she healed properly, even though he was fairly certain he had taken care of her wounds that second time.

He also wanted to figure out just who Kikyo was to him. She seemed to know him very well; she even knew his history it seemed. And although a piece of him did not want to believe her, he could tell that she was very sincere for the most part. He wanted to remember her and then maybe he could understand why she looked at him with a longing in her eyes and why his inner demon still claimed her.

-8-8-8-8-

Kagura continued to watch the reunited couple. She could tell Sesshomaru was still suffering from his fall for the simple fact that he was not as responsive to Rin as he would have been if he knew that she was his baby. She recalled how he had acted when he knew that his little human was carrying his baby, how he did not wish to leave his human’s side, how he continuously touched her flat belly in awe, how he seemed so completely amazed to have created a life with his priestess. _He had better remember_ , Kagura thought heatedly. How stupid would it be for him to have gotten into so much, only to walk away from the reason that everything all started.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Sesshomaru and Kikyo continue to clash.


	15. Paradise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

15: Paradise

“She giggles a lot,” Sesshomaru noted while watching Rin chase around Jaken, who knew better than to touch the girl at all, no matter what. Sesshomaru was speaking to Kikyo. They sat together against the house and watched Rin, who was having a great time as far as they could tell.

“She’s happy,” Kikyo assumed anyway. She shrugged for lack of a better thing to do.

Her daughter never showed any signs of unhappiness, except for when Inuyasha left anyway. Most of the time, her little girl was just smiling and laughing and it seemed that she was just happy to be alive. Sometimes, the girl’s mood was infectious and her mother found herself smiling for no other reason than the fact that they were alive. Kikyo did not mind that in the slightest. In fact, she was glad that Rin could affect her in such a way. She was also glad Rin seemed quite content with their lives.

“Why?” Sesshomaru asked in a very puzzled tone. The concept of smiling seemed beyond him, even if the person was so happy. Rin was always smiling, grinning, and laughing about something. He did not even see what she was so happy about.

“She’s just like that,” Kikyo answered while making a brief motion to the child with her hand. Rin had been a smiling child since she was a baby, so Kikyo just figured that was her daughter’s personality. She preferred that to if Rin was sullen.

Sesshomaru accepted that answer because he was not sure what else to say. He and Kikyo were not really getting along any better than they had those first couple of days and he had already been around almost a fortnight. He still shifted between being protective and concerned for her to being frigid and indifferent toward her. He was not sure how he was supposed to act with her and his brain seemed to always be offering conflicting information, so he went with what seemed best for the situation. It made him seem unbalanced at times. He felt unbalanced even more.

Kikyo had been acting as she would toward any other person with Sesshomaru, but she was secretively hoping his memory returned. She tried her best to be courteous toward him, but every now and then, she found herself having a rude moment with the frustrating demon. It was usually because he seemed to think his word was law, as if the sun would not rise or set without his say so. He was actually quite the stubborn ass in her opinion sometimes and she felt the need to inform him of that a couple of times.

The platinum-haired demon got along with Rin somewhat. He did not seem to know how to go about giving her attention, but it was not very hard. He listened to her whenever she started talking and it never mattered what she was going on about. He generally answered any questions she had in some manner to the best of his ability, even though he did not know why he bothered most of the time. She asked the silliest questions, like where did he think birds were going and things like that. Still, she seemed to grow on him and there was nothing he could do about it. In fact, he did not want to do anything about it. _Why am I fine with being attached to her?_ He did not have an answer for that.

“Mommy,” Rin called, taking a moment from her play with Jaken to give him sometime to catch his breath.

Jaken took a moment to gasp and resent what was going on. He appeared rather sour, but he made sure not to direct that expression toward Rin. The little goblin considered running away. After all, he was not following his master to become some wild child’s toy. Rin treated him awful in his opinion and it upset him to no end that his master spoke up for the human child rather than taking his side in matter. After all, he had been by his master’s side for years, through tough times, while this brat was just a lowly human brat.

“Yes?” Kikyo replied to her daughter.

“Can we have stew for dinner tonight?” the girl inquired out of the blue it seemed.

“I suppose,” the priestess conceded. She needed to feed her daughter something heavy after days of soup, sandwiches, and other simple things of that nature. “I would have to go to town for some of the ingredients, though,” she warned Rin. Her child did not like it when she left, so she wanted to give Rin time to get used to the idea that she would be gone for a while.

“It’s okay. Mister Sesshomaru and Mister Jaken can watch me,” Rin volunteered the pair of demons as if that was the most logical thing for her to say. She would still miss her mother when she was gone, but she would at least have company and her mother would not have to worry about her.

Kikyo did not let it show on her face, but she was very skeptical on that suggestion. She had only gone to town a few times since Sesshomaru and Jaken showed up and she made sure to not be gone for long. She was never gone for more than an hour and anything close to that was pushing it. She wanted to trust Sesshomaru, but in his current state of mind, it was very hard to do. He seemed to be such a cold demon and he seemed to like that about himself, so she did not want him alone with their baby for too long, even though he seemed to get along with Rin rather well.

“I’ll go with you,” Sesshomaru said to Kikyo, which caught her by surprise.

“It’s not necessary,” she tried to argue.

She mistrusted that little toad much too much to allow him to be the only one with her baby. At least Sesshomaru did not seem like he would hurt Rin, but she had no clue what Jaken might do with no one around, especially since the little girl liked “playing” with him so much. But, she knew that Sesshomaru would not accept not going along now that he had the notion in his head. She could leave a few soul collectors since Jaken was not very powerful as demons went. The soul collectors probably could hold him off if he tried something.

“I’ll go with you,” Sesshomaru repeated in the same tone of voice to show her there would not be a debate on the matter, as she suspected.

“Why?” the raven-haired priestess asked in a guarded tone. She did not understand why he would want to come with her into town with a bunch of humans, all of whom he had made it clear that he despised.

“Because I will,” he answered.

The golden-eyed demon never offered Kikyo reasons for why he did anything. It was actually something that she was accustomed to from him because when he had been an angel, he did not give her reasons or explanations for things either. Back then, he never saw the point to such things; now, he just believed that his reasons were his own. It was just a bit irksome.

Sesshomaru was a bit curious about the village and why every time Kikyo went, she left Rin behind. He wondered why she did not take Rin with her. _Surely it would be safer for her to keep Rin with her_ , he thought. He figured if he saw the town again, he might find out why she would not take Rin with her.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru walked side by side with Kikyo through the village market. He noted the villagers’ reaction to him and to Kikyo. Their eyes seemed to try to stab into him and the petite woman by his side. They stared with such distain in their eyes for Kikyo and also for him, which did not make sense to him.

He was a demon, so he expected the humans to fear and loathe him because they could not match his power. But, Kikyo was a miko. She protected the village from dangerous demons, she tended to the sick and wounded. She helped people. He could not fathom why they would hate her and he could tell from the looks in their eyes that they detested her more than they disliked him. And then a voice in the back of his head that sounded suspiciously like Naraku, not that he could remember Naraku, reminded him that Kikyo was a pariah.

Kikyo was an outcast and Sesshomaru knew that for some reason, but he did not know why he knew that. He also did not know why she was a pariah. He stepped closer to her as soon as he recalled that bit of information. He did not trust the humans at all now and thought they might try to harm her. It would be a cold day in Hell that someone harmed her while he was around, not that he consciously acknowledged that.

The fallen angel watched his hostess as she bargained with merchants to secure the ingredients she could require to prepare the meal that Rin desired. He could see how difficult everyone was with her and they all tried their best not to sell to her, to discourage her, but she never gave in. She stayed her course and negotiated until she got her way by sheer willpower.

“Do you always give into Rin’s whims?” Sesshomaru asked as they started back to the house once she had all that she needed. It had taken a couple of hours. He could not believe the fight she put up just because the child wanted stew, but then again, he supposed it would not be good to give up against the villagers no matter what. The villagers would probably take it as a sign of weakness if she gave up on anything she started and that would only make matters worse for her.

“Only if they are harmless,” Kikyo answered, securing her items in basket to carry them home.

“And is it always so irksome to deal with these people?” he inquired, frowning slightly. He had no real problem with her spoiling her daughter. It was her daughter, after all, so she could do what she liked with the child. He did have a problem with her having to go through so much over so little thanks to the humans that she was surrounded by.

“When dealing the villagers, one must have patience,” the priestess replied.

“I would rather something less time consuming,” he pointed out. He would have rather forced the villagers to just give Kikyo everything that she wanted, everything that she deserved, but he held back. Consciously, he decided he should not help her because she did not matter to him. But, throughout the whole ordeal, his nerves burned for him to act.

“Well, we’re not all all-powerful demons,” she remarked with a small smile on her face.

Sesshomaru noticed her expression and he found himself liking her with a smile on her face. He actually smiled a bit himself. She noted his expression, which caused her to smile even more. He considered if she continued smiling, he might grow a bit fond of her.

“I suppose not, but you’re still more useful to them than they are to you and you should use that to your advantage,” the demon commented.

“I don’t do things that way,” the petite woman replied smoothly.

“No, I suppose not,” he said coolly.

Sesshomaru had to admit that for some reason he liked the way that Kikyo did things. She was such a powerful woman, but quietly powerful. There was just something about her and the way that she did things, which he continued to think on until they got back to the house. Rin threw his thoughts off. He never did figure out what that something was about Kikyo.

“Mommy!” the child cried as she dashed toward the returning pair. She latched onto her mother’s hakama with one hand and then pointed in the direction of the house with the other. The adults were slightly alarmed and Sesshomaru plotted his servant’s demise if he failed to protect the girl.

“What’s wrong, angel?” Kikyo asked, making sure not to sound as concerned as she was. She did not wish to distress her baby any more than she already was.

“Jaken keeps chasing around Ryu! He might hurt him,” Rin reported.

“Ryu?” Sesshomaru echoed. He wondered who this Ryu person was and why he had been around Rin, but overriding that was the fact that Rin sounded so distraught. He disliked that immensely. He would pummel that little toad if he had hurt whoever it was that Rin did not want him to hurt.

Sesshomaru stepped forward and went ahead of the two females. He approached the house and saw his servant chasing around one of the three soul collectors that Kikyo had left to watch Rin. The platinum-haired demon froze when he saw the insect-like spiritual creatures. He was then hit by a memory of himself showing Kikyo how to summon the beings and how to control them.

“Sesshomaru,” Kikyo said when she noticed he was just standing there as if he was stuck in place. He did not respond.

“Mister Sesshomaru,” Rin called to him because she thought something was wrong with him. She trotted over to him and she tugged on his pant leg to get his attention, which worked. He blinked and then turned his eyes down to her.

“Yes?” he replied.

“Are you all right, Sesshomaru?” Kikyo asked, now trying to hide her concern for him. Despite the fact that he got on her nerves, he was still her love and she worried about him.

“I am fine,” the regal-looking demon answered.

Sesshomaru wondered what that vision was that he had just had. _Was that a memory?_ Had he taught Kikyo how to manifest those creatures? That was what his brain seemed to be telling him. _How deep is my past with her? Why would I bother to teach her such a thing?_ He was not even sure if he knew how to do something like that now.

They all went over to the house now that it was established Sesshomaru was fine. Kikyo dismissed the soul collectors and they vanished at the wave of her hand, leaving Jaken very confused since he was not chasing anything anymore. He looked around, gaping at the fact that his enemies were suddenly gone.

“What just happened?” Jaken shouted, jumping up and down.

“Mommy sent them back home,” Rin answered, as if that was supposed to make any sense to him.

“What?” Jaken said, throwing up his hands. No one replied, as they felt like Rin gave him a perfectly good response.

Kikyo began to prepare dinner almost immediately and Sesshomaru busied himself by staring at her. _How in the world do I know her_ , he kept asking himself. _How could I know this strange little human?_ It was doubtful even now that he would believe that he knew her in the biblical sense, but he was at least accepting of the idea that he had some sort of real history with her. If she knew such a thing, she would be pleased with it and consider it a good start, even though she wanted the process to go faster.

“Mister Sesshomaru?” Rin said while sitting down next to him.

Rin liked the tall demon. She figured that out about the second that he decided that he was going to stay. There was something about him that just made her happy that he was there and it was very different from when Inuyasha was around. She could not explain it and she would never bother to try anyway. She was four years old, after all. She just accepted things and went on with her life. She felt safe and comfortable around him.

“Yes?” Sesshomaru asked.

“Are you going to eat stew with us?” she inquired with a small, curious smile.

He was blunt with her, but his tone still managed to be gentle. “No.”

“You never eat with us. I think it’s weird, but Mommy says it’s not, but I think so. I mean, don’t you get hungry?” she asked with a puzzled expression on her face.

Sesshomaru thought on the question. He did not get hungry in the way that the little girl meant, but he could understand the feeling. He hungered for something, but he could not figure out what that something was. He was not sure what would satisfy his mind, body, and soul if he had one. Those three things craved something, but he did not know what to feed them. So, yes, he did get hungry. He was hungry all of the time.

His inner demon lately had been demanding the little priestess, as if having her would sate him in someway. He just continued to ignore his internal beast. For some reason, he believed the primitive part of him wanted to harm Kikyo in some way. The civilized section of him desired no part in hurting her. _I will never hurt her_.

“So, you don’t get hungry?” Rin repeated her question because he had not answered her. She knew if she were persistent enough, he would always answer her.

“I do,” Sesshomaru confirmed.

“Then have some stew. Please,” she implored him with a grin and big begging eyes. She felt very impolite eating meals in front of him and he never ate.

Sesshomaru nodded to show that he would have some of the food. He was starting to consider that the strange child might be an imp of some kind and casting a spell on him. A spell would explain why she had a power over him to make him answer questions that he believed were useless and give into her pointless request. Yes, she had to be an imp of some kind, he decided.

When dinner was served, Sesshomaru was handed a bowl. He sniffed at the food curiously, earning the attention to the chef and her daughter. He noticed their chocolate eyes on him and decided to give the food a try to avoid any more stares. He tasted it and then coughed as the flavor of the meal hit his tongue.

“Careful. She likes it spicy,” Kikyo informed him while nodding toward their little girl, who was merrily devouring the blazing hot meal.

“God, woman, if it was any hotter, you might as well be feeding the child magma,” Sesshomaru declared. The meal was actually close to bringing tears to his eyes. His servant could not believe that he was actually eating human food and merely gawked at the scene in sheer disbelief.

“Like I said, she likes it spicy,” the priestess commented while a small smile. She did not want him to see that she was amused because he would take it as her laughing at him. She did not want to go through him getting huffy about her disrespecting him.

Sesshomaru noted Rin seemed very content with the meal and was just gobbling it down as if it was a tolerable temperature. Kikyo, on the other hand, was having plenty of milk with the stew. Rin did not seem to notice there was anything hot about it.

“Mommy, you should make it hotter next time,” Rin declared, finding this to actually be mild.

The golden-eyed demon could not believe that the little girl was serious about wanting the meal hotter next time. He did not understand how the food had not burned Rin’s little tongue, throat, and stomach. He decided to stop thinking about it or it would only baffle him further.

“For some reason, Rin’s able to eat the most intense foods and continue on,” Kikyo tried to explain when she noticed how baffled Sesshomaru looked. She could not explain things beyond that, though. She assumed it had something to do with the fact that Rin was half-angel.

Sesshomaru slowly ate the food and noted that it did not taste all that bad. It was just burning. He wondered when was the last time he tasted something other than his own saliva. He was fairly certain it was his first time tasting anything and it was quite the experience. He devoured the whole bowl, yet aside from the meal, there was still something on the tip of his tongue. Maybe it was not his first time tasting something.

“Would you like some more?” Kikyo asked Sesshomaru since he was done. It took her a while to make it through stew when she made it because it was probably as close as she would ever get to ingesting lava. She was actually sweating thanks to the stew.

“No, I don’t think my throat could take anymore,” Sesshomaru answered.

“I know how you feel. Rin doesn’t even seem to notice, though,” Kikyo commented.

Sesshomaru glanced at the child, who had an elfish sparkle in her eye and a satisfied smile on her face as she ate three bowls without the aid of water or milk. A full belly made the very hyper child fall asleep quite easily. She crawled over to her mother for a story and did not even make it to hearing the middle of the tale that Kikyo read. Kikyo kissed Rin on the forehead as she put the child to bed.

Sesshomaru sat back and watched them both. He felt as if he was home while he was with the ladies, he noted. He wondered why that was, but he liked the feeling. He guessed that was partly why he stayed with them and he wondered if it would make him continue to stay with them. He was not sure about the answer, though.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru watched as Kikyo rose from her bed. He noticed every few nights Kikyo woke up in the middle of the night and she left the house. He followed her, even though he knew where she went. She liked to take a short bath alone in the hot spring that was not too far from the house. He disliked the habit of hers because she went off at midnight and it was dangerous. She could have been attacked by demons and even though he was confident that she could take down almost any demon, he still did not like the idea that she could possibly be attacked.

The fallen angel typically respected Kikyo’s privacy and did not venture far enough to where he could see her as she bathed, even though he wanted to. He was usually able to ignore his desire, but not that night. He went far enough to where he could see her quite well. He was not sure why he gave in. He guessed he was just curious about the female that stayed on his mind and appeared in his memories.

Sesshomaru knew the miko was aware of him. She could sense his demonic aura, but she was used to him being there by now. She thought he would keep his usual distance and have the courtesy to not watch her bathe.

Kikyo enjoyed her midnight bath because it gave her a chance to completely relax; well, to relax as much as she possibly could, which was probably comparable to squirrel surrounded by snakes. During the day, she bathed with her daughter and Rin was just as active bathing as she was doing anything else. Rin was like ball of lightning, pure energy. So, every few days, Kikyo just needed a few minutes where she could unwind. She seriously needed time to let her mind stop.

The first time Sesshomaru had followed Kikyo, it made her very tense. She was not sure why he had gone out with her and she was not sure what he planned to do. It was not that she thought he would attack her, but he might make one of his impulsive, unexplained decisions and suddenly want to be next to her. She would not have been able to take her bath if he had done that, but he stopped and remained out of sight. So, she had gone along with her plan.

The priestess sighed the moment that she hit the water. The hot water and minerals washed away her stress quite quickly. She leaned against some rocks surrounding the spring and closed her eyes. _This feels so good_ , she commented in her head.

Sesshomaru’s eyes feasted on the pale beauty before him. He was so lucky she could not properly judge distances when sensing an aura because she would have barked on him for peeping. Sesshomaru did not consider it “peeping,” especially when he realized he knew that body. He knew every piece of that creamy flesh. He knew it by heart, but not in any other way. He was aware he did not know what that body truly felt like or what it truly tasted like. It like having ghosts on his fingertips and tongue as he remembered, though. He knew it, but he did not know it. He believed he should be more familiar with such a divine piece of heavenly art. _She’s even managed to bring out my poetic side_.

“Why do I know her so well?” the fallen angel asked the night air, which of course had no answers.

Now, the golden-eyed male did not object to knowing such a breathtaking female in the slightest. _Kikyo is perfect_ , he realized as he watched her. She was something beyond human, something that transcended the earth realm itself. _Perhaps, she is an enchantress_ , he considered. This would help explain her daughter being decidedly an imp. There just had to be some logical reason he stuck around her and her odd daughter. There also had to be a reason for his considering her form something akin to paradise. And magic was a logical explanation in his opinion.

Kikyo sighed. It was not very loud, but Sesshomaru had sensitive ears and he picked up on it. He knew that small, content sound and it eased through him. He had flashes of Kikyo sighing, pictures of her rushing through his brain. He shook them away because they came much too rapidly for him to make any sense out of them. It was like his mind was working in overtime, trying to recall just who she was, but it did not help because everything was coming in a jumble.

“Who is this woman?” Sesshomaru asked himself with a bit of a growl. His face and body tensed for a moment. He was frustrated because she now plagued his mind and he did not know why yet, even though his brain tried and tried again.

The platinum-haired demon continued to watch the miko until she was done with her bath. She put her clothes back on and was about to go back home, but a disturbance halted her. She reached for bow when an apparition launched itself at her out of nowhere from the darkened forest. It seemed that Sesshomaru’s fear had come true.

Kikyo did not panic. She took hold of the apparition since it was much too close to shoot with an arrow. She caught it before it had a chance to take hold of her with its teeth. She channeled her spiritual energy into her hands and made short work of the demon.

While Kikyo handled that one demon, Sesshomaru came out of nowhere it seemed and dashed by her. She turned around to see him cut down three other demons that were probably going to attack her. He made sure they would never attack anyone ever again.

“You should go back home,” Sesshomaru said in a calm tone that made it sound like a suggestion, but it was an order. He also made it a point to look as aloof as possible.

“I had the situation in hand,” Kikyo replied in an equally calm tone, even though he was getting on her last nerve with that superior attitude of his. She had been very aware of the situation and did not need his help.

“Did you?” he countered as if he was calling her weak with those two words.

“I don’t need you babysitting me. I’ve gotten along quite well without you for five years,” she snapped, not meaning to add that last sentence, but he was so infuriating. She decided to stop arguing before she let her mouth runaway from her again. She would just go back home to Rin.

Sesshomaru stared at the retreating priestess’ back. The look of fury that had been in her chocolate eyes went beyond the fact that he had just rescued her, which he would have appreciated some gratitude on, but that was another matter. She brought up five years for some reason. It seemed that they had a long history together and he could not remember it. He wanted to recall their history because she was such an impressive wench, but she was an anomaly to him. There was just something about her.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru watched Rin as she played in the stream. It was a stream that looked very familiar to him. Of course, he was not able to place it, which was annoying. Sometimes, he wondered about his brain and if it functioned properly.

Kikyo had gone off into the village to take care of some business and he had tried to go with her, but she still seemed to be a bit upset about last night. She told him to stay because Rin was the one that required a babysitter. He decided not to challenge her, mostly due to fiery look in her eyes and he was not in the mood to upset her more, so he watched Rin. She was bit easier to get along with than her mother, anyway, especially while her mother was aggravated.

Rin had a good time as usual playing around in the stream. She splashed around in the cool water, wetting Jaken. Sesshomaru was glad the child had such a delightful time. He then sniffed the air because he caught the scent of something very familiar. The identity then spilled from his lips without instructions from his brain.

“Kagura,” Sesshomaru said, staring directly at her, but not seeing her.

The guardian angel hung around next to Rin. She turned her attention to her old hangout partner and smirked at him because she heard him say her name. _Sounds like someone is getting his mind back in order_. Kagura smiled.

The ruby-eyed angel did not say anything out loud because she was not there to talk to the fallen angel. She was not sure if he would hear her anyway, but she did not want to chance it. She was there solely for Rin, starting to understand why human women went through all that horrible, ugly-looking labor. Rin’s laugh alone was worth it. She grew more envious by the day of humans, their Garden, their freedom, and their ability to produce something so cute that even she was forced to admit that Rin was utterly adorable.

“What’s he doing here?” Naraku demanded as he appeared by Kagura.

Sesshomaru seemed to notice the adversary’s presence immediately, even though he could no longer see heavenly beings. He frowned deeply the second that Naraku showed up and growled. He did not like the change in the atmosphere.

“Rin,” the platinum-haired demon called in his usual calm voice.

“Yes?” the child replied.

“Come here for a moment,” he ordered, motioning to himself.

The little girl did not argue. She trotted over to Sesshomaru, who stood up from where he was. He moved in front of her and stared into the space that she had been in, which was now held by Naraku and Kagura. The invisible angels stared back. Sesshomaru frowned deeper than he had already been doing. Rin turned to look in the direction that the demon was focused on.

“Mister Sesshomaru, who are they?” Rin asked while pointing at the angels. Kagura and Naraku glanced at each other to make sure that they saw the same thing, as in the fact that the child could see them.

“No one important. Come on,” Sesshomaru replied and he took Rin’s hand to lead her back to the house.

“Wait for me, master!” Jaken cried as he struggled to get out of the deep water, deep for him anyway. He followed behind the departing pair, leaving the two angels at the stream alone.

“Don’t worry, Naraku. He doesn’t even know who they are,” Kagura said to answer the question the adversary had posed upon arrival.

“He shouldn’t be here,” Naraku argued with a scowl, sounding a bit vexed with the current situation. The whole point of a punishment was that it was supposed to be tormenting and yet Sesshomaru had been punished by being sent exactly where he wanted to be. _Who the hell is doing the relocating_ , he wondered.

“But, he is here and there’s nothing anyone can do about that. He’s pretty much on his own now that he’s out of the Heavens. But, like I said, he doesn’t even know who they are. You don’t have any power over him and you don’t have any rights to the woman anymore. You’ve judged her already. You used up your cards. Just let it go,” Kagura stated with a sigh.

“Perhaps I’ll have to demand more time with that woman. She’s obviously content to live in sin and it is my job to change that,” Naraku pointed out. He might not have any power of Sesshomaru since a fallen angel was pretty much out of everyone’s control once he hit the ground, but he could always get more time for that woman. He would show them what a punishment was supposed to be like.

“They haven’t done anything that is a sin,” the guardian angel pointed out. Unless driving each other mad counted as a sin and the last time she checked, that one was not on the list. _If it was, I would’ve fallen a long time ago thanks to these nutty angels_.

“They will do something. Besides, there is still their little abomination. Something must be done about her. But, as long as she lives, then that woman continues to sin. I will just have to judge her again until she learns,” Naraku declared and then he vanished.

Kagura shook her head. He just would not be satisfied until he destroyed as many of the “unworthy” humans as he possibly could. She did not understand why he was like that and she knew it was because she not an adversary angel. As a guardian angel, all she knew was that he was creepy to her because his job was pretty much the opposite of hers. She wondered if Sesshomaru used to find him creepy. She was aware he found the adversary annoying, but then again, Sesshomaru found everyone annoying.

She was not sure if Naraku would be allotted another opportunity to punish Kikyo, but then again, she could be wrong. The Heavens were shaky when it came to sinners. They handled things in weird ways all the time and even she found it hard to pin down the exact rules and routines for things. She did not think that angels, from the seraphim on down to her kind, knew how to handle humans. They made poor judgments all the time because angels just were not perfect, even if they liked to think they were since they had no will. Humans and angels were just two different creatures and one handling the other did not seem to work in her opinion, but she was just a guardian angel and no one listened to the lowest gear in the machine.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru took Rin back to house while thinking about the name he spoke and the scent he smelled. _Kagura_. He knew her. He could remember speaking with her, not that he could recall what they talked about. He just could recollect talking with her. He would almost say they were friends, but he could not go that far.

And then he thought about the other entity that he sensed there. _Naraku_. He knew that one too, he realized. He knew Naraku spelled trouble, especially for Kikyo and Rin. Well, if Naraku wanted to get to Kikyo and Rin, he would have to go through Sesshomaru, the demon silently vowed. No one would harm them as long as he was around. He would never allow it.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Sesshomaru steals a kiss Kikyo. Is it because he remembers or is he still just being domineering?


	16. You only can rescue me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

16: You only can rescue me

Sesshomaru watched Kikyo and Rin as they slept. The child was curled up into her mother’s side looking quite comfortable and happy, smiling a bit in her sleep. He sat very close to them while they were laid out on the small pallet, appreciating the sight of them for a reason that was beyond him. They slept rather deeply. It was something that was not new for Rin, but it was for Kikyo. She would be surprised to know just how easily and deeply she slept with Sesshomaru around, despite the way they got along.

The fallen angel gently caressed their cheeks every now and then, marveling at how soft both of them were. He could not get enough of just lightly touching them, feeling them, and knowing that they were there. He caressed their silky ebony hair, pushing it out of the way a bit and revealing their ears. He traced Kikyo’s ear and then he traced Rin’s pointed little ear. He then stopped and traced the point of his own ear.

“That’s a curious little item,” the golden-eyed male muttered, referring to the shape of his ear and its similarity to Rin’s ear.

“You’d better remember them, you pompous ass,” Kagura said as she floated around Sesshomaru. It was like he had never fallen now she knew where he was and she could bug him all over again if the urge came over her.

“I know you’re there,” he informed her in a whisper of a voice to make sure he did not wake up the mother and child. His face tensed slightly because of the angel’s presence, but he did not think much of it at first.

“I know you know. Wait, you can fucking hear me?” she asked in a slightly astonished tone. She had a feeling he would be able to hear her since he could smell her, but she had not been looking to find out.

“Barely,” he answered. He already got the feeling that he wished he could not hear her. A part of him could remember her talking his ear off and he knew he would rather not go through that again.

“That’s good enough. Just like the good old days,” Kagura remarked. She did not know it, but she was smiling a bit as she spoke.

“Who are you to me, Kagura? How do I know you?” he asked curiously, still speaking in a whisper. He knew she was something akin to a friend, but the irksome feeling creeping around inside him from her mere presence let him know she was not exactly a friend.

“Like you told the shrimp, I’m nobody important. They’re the important ones, you fucking moron. So, you need to remember them and stop playing around,” she answered with an attitude. It was not like she needed him, but they did. She supposed that was her guardian angel side taking control there.

“Why not just tell me?” he inquired in a low, irked tone. He could not remember and that was the problem. His mind betrayed him every moment by not doing as he wished. He wanted someone to just spell everything out for him, so he knew what was going on. It seemed like the best way to do things to him. His question annoyed the angel by his side.

“Because it’s not the same damn thing, you damn idiot. Stop acting like such a damn moron and just remember. They need you and you need them. If you’re not going to remember, what the hell was the point in your falling? You shouldn’t have done any of this shit if you’re just going to be happy being a dumbass demon who can’t even remember life before his fall. You act all high and mighty, but you can’t even do something as simple as remember your own stupid life. Dumbass,” Kagura said with as much compassion as a wooden plank. She really thought he threw everything away for nothing if he just gave up and waited for someone to tell him what was going on.

“You still talk too much,” Sesshomaru muttered, his lip curled slightly in annoyance for a second. He could not recall her perfectly, but he remembered the guardian angel just running her mouth all the time about nothing in his opinion. Now, she acted all uppity as if she knew anything at all and it bothered him.

“I’ve got a lot to say and no one to say it to since a certain unruly bastard wasn’t happy hanging around in the clouds anymore,” Kagura remarked, actually very close to sounding bitter.

Now, the guardian angel did not consider Sesshomaru her friend, but he was just about the only entity that she talked to when she had the chance. Most other angels just were not worth her attention and she never liked what they had to say in return or how they said it. He had been tolerable to a certain extent and he had tolerated many of her quirks, which was why she stuck around him when she was unemployed.

“Don’t you have a will to go develop somewhere?” the fallen angel quipped. It seemed he remembered enough to get a rise out of her with ease.

Kagura vanished immediately, obviously disliking that comment. He was no longer tolerable at the moment. It was as if he jinxed her to say such a thing. She was trying her best to remain as she was, an angel. She did not want to end up lost in a strange land with no mind, no ties, and no clue as to how anything worked, like him.

Sesshomaru nodded to himself because he could remember things about Kagura, like how he used to listen to her prattle on about things that he never did care about. He recalled Kagura’s desire to live in the humans’ Garden, but her fear of the unknown, the fear of falling. He pretty much recollected her. He could not recall much of his life before his fall, but he remembered that she had been in it before he fell.

“I knew you before the fall, didn’t I, Kikyo?” Sesshomaru whispered as he turned his attention back to the sleeping woman. Something about her lived under his skin, in his mind, and, even though he did not want to admit it, in his heart.

Sesshomaru lifted Kikyo up from her resting place as gently as possible, hoping to avoid disturbing her slumber and Rin’s as well. The child did not seem to realize that the body she was curled into was gone as Sesshomaru moved the miko. The child did not even make a noise. Kikyo stirred, but only from a brief moment. She looked up at him and then snuggled herself into his chest, which stunned him, before she easily fell back to sleep. For such a guarded and stubborn female, she seemed comfortable and trusting of him to a certain extent, especially considering she now slept against him as if there was nothing wrong with it. It was as if she wanted to be where she was at the moment, asleep in his arms and with the way that he felt at the moment, part of him considered he wanted her there, too.

With Kikyo in his arms, Sesshomaru felt overcome by several different wants and desires. He wanted to touch her, caress her, and just feel her soft, creamy skin in general. He wanted to kiss her softly, taste her, drink her in like she was water and he was dying of thirst. He desired to have her right then and there and possibly every day after. But, his wishes went behind the physical, which stunned him.

“This is more than my inner demon claiming you,” he realized.

The fallen angel wanted Kikyo to know she was safe with him for some reason. He wished she knew she could trust him with any and everything in her life and on her mind. He desired to let her know it was all right to let loose and to make her discover ecstasy once she did. He wanted to protect her and her daughter forever from any and all harm. None of it made sense to him, but it was what he wanted. He wanted that to be his life, them to be his life.

“Who are you to me?” Sesshomaru wondered while placing two clawed fingers on the priestess’ soft cheek.

Kikyo leaned into his touch, even in her sleep. She seemed so inviting, so tempting. He studied her and just allowed his brain to wander as he gazed upon her, hoping he would stumble across some memories that involved the petite miko. All he could muster was hearing a voice inside of him calmly chanting that she was his, though.

“How is she mine, then?” Sesshomaru asked himself since his whole being was now hell-bent on claiming the ebony-haired female. It would not be so freaking annoying if his mind just explained exactly how the pale woman was his. _If I could form a full memory, it might help_.

Kikyo belonged to him in some manner, Sesshomaru could accept that because he was pretty certain of it. It had something to do with the fact that his inner demon just would not shut up about it. But, also, most of him now agreed with that savage part of him. _All of me cannot be wrong_. He was not opposed to her belonging to him, feeling it was the way things were supposed to be anyway.

 _Was I with her before I fell?_ He did not see how that was plausible. Thanks to remembering bits about Kagura, he could believe he was like her before his fall, namely an intangible entity. He did not see how he could have possibly been with a woman when he was not even a physical being at the time. But, his mind was not so ready to buy that logical deduction. There was something too familiar about Kikyo and how she felt for his mind to just give into the reasoning that he could not have had her because he did not have a body at the time.

“Was I with you?” Sesshomaru whispered as he stared intently at Kikyo for a moment with the hope that that would help.

The fallen angel glanced over at Rin for a long moment before shifting back to Kikyo. He remembered how distressed the priestess had seemed the day he had tried to leave. She had attempted to keep her composure, but he could see the panic in her eyes, hear it in her voice, and every breath she took betrayed her. Even the way that she had grabbed his arm was an act of desperation, clinging to him as if his possibly leaving would be an earth-shattering event for her.

Sesshomaru looked back at Rin and just thought about everything that happened between him and Kikyo since the day that he had arrived. He also considered Kagura’s words and he began to see what the problem was. He was actually ashamed it had taken him so long to piece things together.

“You were waiting for me, weren’t you, Kikyo? You’re still waiting for me,” he realized.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo had just woken up. She did not open her eyes, but she could tell she was not in her usual resting place. The way her body was folded was not right for her to be on her bed. She was still very comfortable, maybe more so where she was than she could ever be in her bed. She knew almost immediately where she was and part of her hoped it was because he had remembered them.

“Kikyo,” Sesshomaru said because he could tell that she was awake now.

“Yes?” she replied, not bothering to open her eyes. What if it was a dream, after all? She just wanted to savor the fact that he allowed her to lie on him and she could feel his heart beat against her cheek, even if it was just a dream.

“I’m sorry,” he apologized sincerely. He could not believe that he, the all-mighty Sesshomaru, had to apologize to a mere human. The thing was that she was not just any human and he knew that, but he still could not remember. He continued to curse his mind and did his best to dredge up something, anything would do at this point.

Kikyo did not know what Sesshomaru was sorry for, but it did not matter anyway because she did not want apologizes. None of what happened was his fault if he was apologizing for what she thought he was apologizing for. It was all beyond their control.

“It’s all right,” the priestess replied honestly. She understood they could not help what happened. “This was beyond us.”

“It’s not all right. I just… I don’t remember,” he admitted in a low voice with a frustrated growl. _Why can I not remember after so much time?_ He could piece together what was going on, but he just could not remember anything.

“It’ll come to you,” she tried to assure him in a gentle tone. She honestly believed if he gave it time, everything would come back to him. “Not everything happens in the blink of an eye.”

“I don’t want to wait anymore. I want to know. I want to know who I was, who you are, and who Rin is. I want to know it all from my memory and I want to know now,” he stated. _Damn the bastards that took such precious things from me_ , he silently swore.

“It wouldn’t be the same if I told you,” she pointed out since he said that he wanted to know now.

“I know,” he concurred.

Sesshomaru did not release Kikyo, even though she was now awake and fully aware of what he was doing. In fact, he held onto her tighter. She was someone important to him and he wanted to make her aware that he knew she was important to him without saying it out loud. He leaned down and rested his forehead against hers. Maybe touching her, holding her, being with her in someway that did not involve them arguing somewhat would help him remember exactly who she was.

With the demon being so close and acting more like the Sesshomaru that she recalled, Kikyo could not resist the urge to touch him. She traced the magenta stripes on his pale cheek. She wondered why he bore such markings now. He felt surprisingly soft, soft and smooth. His skin was perfect. Sesshomaru closed his eyes and just reveled in her tender touch. He knew it was something he had longed for and he enjoyed every second of it.

He wished her touch would trigger his mind and just flood him with memories now. Nothing came, though. He took in her scent, which was similar to wild flowers, but there was something that was distinctly her underneath it all. Her wonderful smell did not do anything for his memory, but it did fill him with odd satisfaction. He was pleased to be able to take in her aroma and enjoy it. He wanted to be able to do that with all of her and he believed for that to happen, he needed to remember who she was.

 _Who is she to me?_ Sesshomaru still wondered because of the peculiar moment he was locked into. He had never allowed anyone to touch him before, but he let her do it, loving that she was doing it. It made him feel strangely, but a good type of strange. It was a type of strange that he would welcome any time of the day actually.

 _Is Kikyo the person that I could recall lusting after?_ There was something about her that made him think that she was, even though she did not seem like the type of woman to give herself to anyone. But, he was not just anyone. Something about her set off something inside of him that he was not aware existed until she was near him. There was something about her that he could not explain, but he liked it. He was attracted to whatever that something was.

At the moment, Sesshomaru did not feel anything lustful toward the slender female. When he followed her for her midnight bath, there was a different story, though. But, right now, he had no desire to strip her naked and have her cry out for him. At that moment, he was very content to hold her and be caressed by her. He did not feel a slither of lust. Instead, he felt the warmth of something just beyond his comprehension.

Kikyo was not aware of the thoughts swirling around in Sesshomaru’s mind. She took in the way he felt in a way that she never had before. As she caressed him, she had to fight the urge to sit up and kiss him, cling to him, keep him with her forever and always. She ached for him to remember who she was, so that they could once again be meaningful lovers, but she had to let him go at his own speed. So for now, she was content to feel his skin on her fingertips and in her palm. Things were better now than that had been for a while, so she was happy for that.

 _This is so very different from the dreams_ , Kikyo noted. There was more weight him, somehow. Her simple caress and the feel of his skin seemed heavier. Before, it was like he surrounded her, but now it was more like he engulfed her. He was everywhere, but with added pressure. The pressure was wonderful.

“Kikyo, did I make you any promises?” the platinum-haired demon inquired, bringing her out of her revelry.

“You didn’t have to. Don’t worry about that. If you’ll excuse me, I need to make Rin breakfast,” Kikyo replied, remembering her responsibilities. She wished she could stay with him for the whole day, feeling him and enjoying him, but their daughter came first.

“By all means,” he said.

Sesshomaru reluctantly released the petite miko and she reluctantly rose to her feet. _At least he’s trying to remember_ , she thought with a sigh. She felt just a little lighter. With luck, he would recall who she was and recall who Rin was. She felt better, though, knowing he tried. Maybe soon, they could all be together and be at family at the same time. It was her wish for that to be so.

-8-8-8-8-

The platinum-haired male continued studying Kikyo and Rin, attempting to recollect everything about his life and how they fit into it. He sat against the house while they were some feet away from him. He ordered his brain to recall everything it knew before waking up in that accursed forest. He closed his eyes for a moment or so as an attempt to will his brain to work properly.

“Mommy, what’s Mister Sesshomaru doing?” Rin asked because it looked like the tall demon had fallen asleep to her, but she had never seen him sleep. She gave Jaken a break by staying close to her mother that day. She just felt the urge to be near her mother and get some motherly acknowledgment.

“I don’t know, but let’s not disturb him,” Kikyo replied. She considered he might be trying to figure out everything and just get his thoughts in order. They could not help him if that was the case.

“Okay,” the child agreed with a bright smile and a nod to emphasize her stance.

“Let’s get a book to read,” the priestess suggested.

“Okay,” Rin agreed again with a huge grin.

The mother and child passed by Sesshomaru as they went to retrieve a book from inside their home. They did not bother him, even though Rin took a moment to look intensely at him. She just wanted to see if he was asleep, but something told her that he was wide-awake. She did not bother him and helped her mother find a book to read her. They then left the house again, going passed the golden-eyed demon, but not disturbing him. They parked themselves by a fallen tree where sunlight poured into the area. Kikyo opened the book and began reading to Rin.

Sesshomaru opened his eyes for a moment, just to check on where Kikyo and Rin were. He also wanted to see what they were doing. He was close to smiling when he saw them cuddled up together with a book and part of him longed to be there with them. He dismissed that desire because he had more important matters to handle first.

Once the demon was satisfied with seeing the mother and daughter, he closed his eyes again. He stayed where he was all day long, only occasionally bothered by Jaken. He did not have to worry about telling the little toad to leave him along after saying it once. After that one time, anytime the imp crept toward Sesshomaru, Kikyo stopped Jaken by reminding him in a calm tone that Sesshomaru did not want to be disturbed. She then moved her bow and Jaken always ran off in a panic, having witnessed what she could do with that weapon just once. Once was enough for him when it came to power that could reduce most demons to ashes.

Kikyo did not understand how Sesshomaru could stand that pest of a green demon. She had never met such an inflated weakling. Jaken thought he was so strong, but he was actually the weakest among them, including Rin. Rin had powers, most of which were beyond her and her mother’s understanding.

Rin’s powers had manifested a few times in the child’s short life. They often made for an odd moment that Rin failed to notice and Kikyo usually needed a few seconds to get her heart rate together. The priestess guessed her daughter got such powers from her father. With luck, if he remembered anything, he might be able to teach their daughter how to use her powers before she hurt herself or someone else.

Every now and then through out the day, Sesshomaru glanced up to stare at Kikyo or Rin. His amber eyes revealed nothing on his mind. He just watched them. He studied them as if they were fish in a bowl. He took in every movement that they made, voluntary or not, blatant or subtle, just everything. He took in everything he could and he spent the day like that.

As Kikyo went to put Rin to bed for the night, she walked by Sesshomaru. There were no words passed between them, but she noticed that he nodded slightly. She wondered why he had made such a movement, but she did not ask him about it. He did not offer up an explanation for the motion.

“Sesshomaru, do you need anything?” Kikyo called after what seemed like seconds to him, but turned out to be a couple of hours.

“No,” he replied plainly.

“Are you going to sit out there all night?” she asked.

“No.”

“All right.”

Kikyo was going to sleep. While time meant nothing to Sesshomaru, he learned had Kikyo’s and Rin’s schedules quickly. He was aware of what they did almost to the second and he committed all to memory without even noticing. He used the information a great deal of the time without noticing.

The pale demon stayed outside for a bit longer and then he went inside to continue eyeing Kikyo and Rin, who were both sleeping soundly. Jaken followed his master and took his usual spot in the corner, out of the way of everyone to go to sleep. Sesshomaru went to the mother and daughter and took in the sight of them. They were special, so beautiful, and so lovely. He felt pride, knowing that they were both his.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo rose for her midnight bath. Sesshomaru followed her as she went out to the usual hot spring. He inhaled her scent deeply as he followed her and purred as the aroma flowed through him. He loved the way that she smelled. He wanted more of that sweet scent. Instead of stopping his usual number of yards from the hot spring, he continued onto the pool. She turned in the direction that he approached and watched as he stalked toward her.

“Sesshomaru,” Kikyo said, wondering why he was straying from their routine.

The demon did not answer to his name. He continued on until he stood in front of her. He reached out and caressed her cheek. _Oh, she feels so good_ , he silently noted. She leaned into his touch while he focused his amber eyes right on her. He then traced her jaw line with the same hand. He did not show any sign of emotion while touching her, even though he thoroughly enjoyed the way that she felt. He cupped her face with both hands and leaned down, gently kissing her lips.

Kikyo felt weak in her knees finally being able to feel his lips on hers. It was infinitely better at that moment than it had ever been five years ago. Reality was so much better compared to the dream world. His lips were downy soft and sweet, but spicy, like some forbidden fruit. Her arms wrapped themselves around his neck without any instructions from her brain, and her brain did not object to the moves.

It was like a jolt went through him the second his mouth joined her. It was like the stars had all aligned and beamed down on him, righting everything in the world. The rush he felt was possibly the most amazing and wonderful thing he had experienced of this world. After a few seconds, he pulled away slightly. His mouth remained centimeters from hers.

“You remember?” Kikyo asked in a low voice. She hoped he remembered or she would feel guilty again because even though he was Sesshomaru, he was not the Sesshomaru that she loved.

“I do now,” Sesshomaru replied.

Yes, he definitely recalled everything now, even though he had not remembered everything before touching Kikyo’s lips. It seemed like he just needed that jumpstart. He had recalled enough before that, though and pieced together enough of what was going on to feel comfortable with kissing her. How he longed for the petite creature that was finally in his grip. He could not believe that he dared to forget her, forget what they had, and forget what she meant to him. She meant more than the Heavens to him. She was paradise.

“So, you just stole that kiss,” she commented in an amused tone.

“You gave it away.”

“No, you stole it. You had no idea who I was to you until you kissed me. You had no right to touch my lips in such a manner.” She could not help the smile on her face.

“How rude of me,” he chuckled.

“Yes, very rude of you to steal a kiss. But, I suppose I could forgive.”

“Could you really? I still don’t believe I stole that kiss. But, I stole this one,” he remarked and he leaned down to kiss her again.

Kikyo melted into the tall demon, thankful that he finally remembered. Then she thought that she might want to check, just to be sure. She pulled away from him for a moment, which he did not like much because he wanted to kiss her until the sun came up. But, he did not say anything in that regard, figuring that she pulled away for something important.

“Sesshomaru,” Kikyo said.

“Yes?” he asked.

“You know who Rin is then?” she asked with an arched eyebrow.

It took him to moment to understand what she was asking him and then he gasped. “Our child. Rin is our child,” he realized in an awed tone.

Sesshomaru gently placed his hand on her flat abdomen, recalling back when she was pregnant. _She’s not pregnant anymore_ , his brain pointed out. She had given birth already, his mind continued trying to catch up from the last time he had held Kikyo to now. So, Rin was what they had created. She was the life that he had sensed so many years ago. He was back to being completely amazed.

“She is… us,” the demon said in a tone that showed he was utterly astonished by that fact. He sounded as if he had just figured out the meaning of life.

“Yes,” she answered.

“We have a daughter. Magnificent, simply magnificent. I knew our child wouldn’t be some man-eating monster who terrorized anything. I knew this. What I didn’t know was that you’d taste so good, feel so good, smell so good,” he stated while holding her to him firmly.

The demon inhaled the priestess’ heavenly scent. She smelled like wild flowers, much like the ones their daughter played in. She was much more delightful than he could have ever imagined, just the smell of her. Having her petite form against his strong body, it was so much better now than in the dreams. He leaned down and kissed her again, much more passionately than before. She did not resist him, returning the show of affection with just as much fire.

Kikyo tasted so good that Sesshomaru doubted he would ever get enough of her. He would kiss her forever if he could and she probably would not object to it if such a thing were possible. He he would never let her go, no matter what. He would always be there for her.

“Now, this is what I fell for,” he whispered against her lips. _Oh, it was very worth it_ , his mind immediately pointed out. _Oh, she feels so good. Everything about her is so good_. _Oh, how I want her_.

“You became a demon for that?” she asked.

“All fallen angels do, but there are worse things to be. In this form, I can be here, really be here,” he replied.

Kikyo did not argue that for that very reason. She looked into his golden eyes. They looked much different now, as if they no longer searched for something, as if they no longer looked down on her. They were still haughty, but he always thought highly of himself. Sesshomaru was back.

The platinum-haired male did not give the miko much of a chance to dwell on the fact that he finally remembered because, well, he finally remembered. He recalled everything that he wanted from her, wanted with her. He recollected everything he wanted to give to her. He remembered how he wanted her to be happy. Yes, she was the reason that he fell and she was worth it. She was definitely worth it. He leaned down and kissed her once more, wanting her to understand through his kiss that she was more precious than anything in the world to him.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Kikyo and Sesshomaru consummate their relationship.


	17. Never felt this hot before

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.
> 
> M-rated chapter ahead. Read at your own risk.

17: Never felt this hot before

Explaining to Rin that Sesshomaru was her father was an adventure and a half for the reunited couple in the morning. The child did not understand how he was her father. She wanted to know why he did not say anything when he first showed up. So, he and Kikyo had to explain that he had lost his memory. The girl, being very young, wanted to know where he found his memory and how it got away from him in the first place. She even suggested that he should hold his memory’s hand to make sure it did not get away; it was what her mother did with her. Obviously, Rin was not accustomed to learning about intangible things. Her whole world revolved around her senses, like most children, so that was what she comprehended.

Once they made it through how Sesshomaru lost his memory, Rin was still confused. Her father was supposed to be an angel, but he was clearly a demon. She pointed that out and they then had to try to explain how he was an angel, but he had fallen from grace. Rin then threw them off by asking questions about Heaven, but she did not give them a chance to respond because she was on a roll. The girl went off on that tangent for a while and seemed to have fun learning about not having a tangible body and learning about other angels when she gave her father the chance to speak. It only took a few minutes for her to forget about the fact that she was bemused by why it had taken her father so long to himself known. She was quite happy that her father was around, though. Her toothy grin said that much.

Jaken was not so accepting of the news, but to be fair, the united family did not care about his negative opinion. “Master, can’t you see this woman is lying to you?” he shouted, pointing at Kikyo with his staff. “She’s bewitched you somehow! She’s some kind of witch and we need to leave here immediately!”

Kikyo regarded the little demon with a cool gaze. He swallowed hard and backed up a little, in case she attacked. Kikyo then turned, going back into the house. She needed to fix breakfast. She had a family to feed.

“Jaken,” Sesshomaru calmly said his servant’s name as a warning for the toad to stop berating his lover. But, Jaken did not shut up.

“Master, you have to see this is some kind of spell! These humans have done something to you! We should leave,” Jaken squawked.

Sesshomaru beamed Jaken with a big rock directly in the middle of his forehead. The tiny green demon whined as he hit the ground. _It’s not fair_. His powerful master could not be involved with a human wench. He wisely shut his mouth after that hit.

“So, can I call you ‘Daddy’?” Rin asked Sesshomaru in an excited tone out of the blue with an adorable hopeful expression on her face. Obviously, the first news of the day had not left her mind as it seemed, even though she had gone all over the place with the conversation, including wanting to know why she did not have “pretty” marks like Sesshomaru.

“I suppose,” he answered simply. He was her father, so it would only be right for her to address him with such a title. If he had a choice, though he doubted he would have picked “daddy” for that title and if Kikyo knew that, she would have explained to him that he should be happy to be dubbed “daddy.” It showed that Rin was very attached to him, after all.

Rin grinned from ear to ear, looking like a glad little cherub oddly enough. Kikyo came and sat next to Sesshomaru while he dealt with Rin, as he had been the whole morning. The priestess was overjoyed to see their baby so genuinely happy. Rin beamed with joy, grinning so much that it was amazing she did not split her face open. Kikyo smiled a bit while watching her love and their daughter interact for the day.

The child eventually fell asleep on Sesshomaru after talking his ear off much more than usual. He could not believe he and Kikyo had created a creature that was almost the complete opposite of them, not that he would complain. Rin smiled even in her sleep and she looked quite adorable. Her mother leaned over and gently caressed Rin’s cheek while Sesshomaru reached over and caressed Kikyo’s cheek.

“I told you I had faith in you,” the miko commented, speaking to the platinum-haired demon. Her voice was low, just a little above a whisper because she did not want to chance waking up Rin.

“I know,” he replied in a whisper.

“So, everything should be fine now, right?” she asked with hope. She did not see how anything else could go wrong. He was there now and they could be together because there was no rule about humans and demons mixing. They could live together as a family without being bothered or split again.

Sesshomaru did not answer the question. It should be fine because she had been judged and he had been punished, but he recalled back when he smelled Naraku with Kagura. If Naraku was involved, it would be trouble more than likely. Naraku was not the type of pest that would give up until Kikyo was a shell of a woman. The adversary angel would not stop until she collapsed in on herself. He was into his job to the point where he would take everything from a human until all the person could do was beg for divine intervention or give up all hope and end the suffering. Strangely enough, Naraku rarely got humans to repent their sins, though.

“Sesshomaru,” Kikyo said in a slightly worried tone because of his silence.

“Yes?” he replied.

“Everything is going to be fine, right?” she asked again with concern mixed in with her hope. Her eyes begged him to confirm her question. She wanted his reassurance that everything would be all right between them and they could truly be together. They could be a family.

“Yes, everything is fine,” he answered, leaning down to kiss her, assuring her of his words through his embrace. Everything was fine for the moment. They were back together, they had a daughter, and he remembered everything, so everything was fine.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru, Kikyo, and Rin all tried to fit on the small pallet that night. Sesshomaru had always wanted to know what it was like to lie down next to Kikyo. It was not what he thought it would be. Of course, when he had pondered it, they had not had a daughter that needed more space than her size suggested. Rin slept just how she lived, crazy and all over the place.

It did not help matters that the pallet was narrow to begin with; it was made for one person. Now, Rin, even though she needed more space than anyone would think, she was still a little thing, being only four years old. Sesshomaru was an adult, full-sized male, so it would not have worked out much better even if Rin did not desire to sleep in the middle, which was where she was. Rin was laid out on both of her parents.

Rin slept peacefully, using her father’s shoulder as a pillow. She was also cuddled up in his boa for the moment; she had just turned into it after nearly kicking her mother in the neck several times, not that Kikyo seemed to mind. Of course, the priestess was used to the way that Rin slept. The child gripped the fluffy, white boa as if it was a toy or a security blanket. She had a small smile on her face.

“Kikyo,” the tall demon said, knowing she was still awake. Surely she reveled in this moment as much as he did.

“Hmm?” Kikyo replied, almost as if she was coming out of a dream, even though she was quite awake. She relished in the fact that they were all together as a family. It felt great and she hoped it remained with her always, just like she hoped they remained a family always.

“We should leave this place soon,” he stated soundly and with deep conviction. He had thought on that for the day, even though it sounded like something he pondered for a long time. He needed to voice the plan sooner rather than later because he believed they should go because there was nothing here for them. He wanted Kikyo to consider it and then to go along with it.

“I cannot,” she informed him easily.

“Why not?” he asked with a frown, not that she could see his expression because of the darkness that surrounded them. She upset him in a strange manner with the way that she did not obey him. It was something he liked. He liked that she did not do what he said, even though it bothered him, too. He could not explain it and did not try to do so, not even to himself.

“At the moment, these people need me,” she replied.

“They hate you, yet you care so much for them?” he inquired because he did not understand that.

She shrugged slightly. “It’s how I am.”

Sesshomaru only nodded, not that Kikyo could see the movement. He accepted her response for the moment and did not continue the discussion. He dismissed the issue and let other things invade his mind. He decided to follow with his new train of thought.

He reached over their daughter, careful not to disturb her rest, and caressed Kikyo’s thigh. Her breath caught in her throat as she felt his hand on her eager skin, but it was not the time for that. She put her hand on his wrist, holding him in place while his fingertips danced on her body. She had yearned for his touch for so long and she doubted she would ever get enough of it. She wished they could take things further and it seemed he wanted that too because his hand strayed, searching for the opening to her yukata.

“Sesshomaru, Rin is right here,” Kikyo pointed out while holding his hand still now.

“Right,” he concurred, knowing what she meant. Rin was right there, so he quickly came up with an alternative plan.

The platinum-haired male eased up off of the pallet, still being very careful not to wake up their daughter. He went over to Jaken and woke the little toad up. The imp wisely did not shout or anything when he noticed that it was still dark, if he had made the mistake and woke Rin up, Sesshomaru would have flung the tiny green demon through the roof.

“Watch Rin,” Sesshomaru commanded his servant in his typical cold tone.

“Yes, master,” Jaken replied in a low, but clear tone.

Sesshomaru then walked back over to the bed. He left the boa for Rin to curl up with, which she did. He then turned his attention to Kikyo, who wondered what he planned. He gathered her up in his arms without warning. She yelped in surprise and gripped his arm as he started for the door. She looked up at him and noticed a strange, determined look in his amber eyes.

“Sesshomaru,” the miko said just to get his attention.

“Yes?” the demon replied as they left the house and he continued on walking.

“Where are we going?” she asked.

“To be alone.”

Kikyo could guess why the fallen angel wanted to be alone. She gulped because as much as she longed for him, she was suddenly very nervous about the idea of being with him. It had been five years and to make matters worse, they were now in real life. The real world and the dream world had already proven to be very different, so she could not help being anxious from the thought of what was to come.

Sesshomaru did not seem to notice Kikyo’s anxiety, despite the fact that he should have been able to smell the change in her body and hear the new rhythm of her heartbeat. He was too set with his task in mind to notice the changes in her. Besides, he did not think she had a reason to be nervous. She preferred that he did not notice because she did not want him to think that she did not want him. She wanted to be with him, but there was still that anxiety. After all, she had never been with anyone in the real world.

The golden-eyed male carried the petite woman to a small clearing in the woods. He eased her down onto the cool grass and almost immediately began kissing her with fervor, showing his intentions from that one embrace. Kikyo could feel butterflies gathering in her stomach while she just lay still, not returning the show of affection. She was very worried about what she knew would come, even though she wanted it to happen.

“Sesshomaru…” Kikyo whispered in a tense voice as she pulled away from him slightly. She wanted to sound normal, but she was too nervous to make it that far. She had to swallow to keep her throat from closing up.

“Yes?” he inquired while taking in the sight of her and just recalling what she looked like without clothes in the way. Yes, she was definitely the person that he lusted after for so long and that lust had not withered, even though he felt so many other emotions toward her now. He wondered if he always felt the other emotions, but did not realize it until now.

Kikyo looked to the left, as if she were embarrassed. “You know, I’ve never…” she trailed off, hoping he would understand what she tried to say.

Sesshomaru gently turned her face back to his and looked down into Kikyo’s eyes. He was very close to smiling. He knew what she was trying to say and he finally noticed she was nervous. He reached up to caress her cheek and to hopefully ease her nerves.

“I know. Just relax,” he replied.

It was a good thing Kikyo said something because he had not considered that in real life she had never been intimate until that moment. It was logical, though since she had only been with him in dreams and if she had been with another man, well, that would have started a new list of problems. He would have to be careful with her because the last thing that he wanted to do was hurt her. He could not allow his lust to control him, he told himself.

“You know, I haven’t either,” he realized.

Kikyo blinked in surprise. “No? Not in these five years?”

“Never. It never occurred to me in these five years. I only wanted to get to you, so all I did was move toward you.”

“You didn’t even remember me,” she pointed out.

“No, but I was compelled to go to you. This is how I ended up here in the first place. Something inside of me told me to go in your direction and when I finally came to you, that something stopped talking. I was home, even if I didn’t know it.”

Kikyo smiled and kissed him. She tried to do as her beloved suggested and relax. He would not hurt her, she reminded herself as she kissed him sweetly. He tried to ease her mind with soft kisses and that helped settle her nerves somewhat, but she was still rather anxious. She began to realize how much she really missed him and how much they still had to experience together. They still had so much ahead of them, so she kissed him back.

She had no idea he would taste so good, so sweet and forbidden. Sesshomaru would say the same of her. The dreams really did not compare to reality. Neither of them could believe what they had missed out on from only being able to interact in dreams, but they would not miss out on it anymore.

“You are divine,” Sesshomaru whispered as he pulled away from her lips just for a breath. After a few breaths, he dived back into her, kissing her and being kissed by her.

Eventually, Sesshomaru’s mouth left hers once he believed that she was comfortable enough with what was going on and he could proceed further. He needed to experience more of her. He went for her neck and found a new taste that he enjoyed just as much as her mouth. He recalled trying to gather a taste from the area back when they had first been together. He now licked and sucked at the creamy flesh as if she was some delicious treat, finding that she was quite sweet, like honey.

He waited for some sign that expressed that he was giving her pleasure and that did not take too long. Kikyo moaned, loudly. _How can he make me feel so good? How can he make me sound so… unlike myself?_ She did not know and she did not need the answer at the moment. She just needed him to keep going.

“Please, don’t stop,” she managed to say through a series of mews.

Sesshomaru quietly noted Kikyo was blissfully scrumptious. _She truly is paradise_. Everything about her was mouth-watering and he would devour her that night, he decided. He would not be able to help it because she overwhelmed his senses. He started to push away her nightclothes, but she quickly stopped him. It seemed she was still anxious about what would happen. She mentally berated herself for her actions, but she did not say anything about it aloud.

“Just relax,” he whispered. He remembered back when they were first together, she had not been so nervous. He guessed that because it was a dream before and, even though it had real consequences, it still was not the same thing as being in reality.

“I’m trying,” she replied in a low, almost ashamed tone. She really wanted to relax and she wanted to be with him, to rediscover their love, but the idea of what was to come almost drowned her.

Sesshomaru attempted to make it so that Kikyo would not even notice when he did undress her. He returned to kissing her on the mouth, keeping her mind occupied with that pleasure. He began caressing her through her clothing, causing her to cry out again and again. His hands were gentle and warm while being sneaky and licentious. His fingers discovered all of the fleshy areas of her body. Oh, she was a handful and then some in every place that he planned to touch.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered in between kisses.

Kikyo’s mind fogged over from the delight that Sesshomaru brought her. She returned all of his kisses while leaning into his touches, shifting to feel more of him. He noticed her reactions while keeping her occupied. He was quite pleased with the task that he had given himself in relaxing her.

The tall demon slowly worked Kikyo out of her yukata without her noticing enough to be nervous. Once she was bare to him, all he could think about was that he needed to taste more of her. He needed feel more of her prefect, creamy, smooth skin. He cupped one of her breasts and started to kiss a path down to the center of the mound. She cooed the whole time. He licked around the small jewel at the middle of the mass. She started panting, having never felt such pleasure before, heat seemed to spread through out her body, and then he latched his mouth onto the tiny gem. She gasped and then cried out loudly as he lavished attention to her. Seconds later, she held his head in place to keep him from stopping, not that he planned to halt anytime soon.

Sesshomaru smirked to himself. Apparently, she was not apprehensive anymore, clutching his head and moaning. He wanted to have her right then and there since she was into everything now, but she was so delectable that he wanted to taste more of her. He stayed where he was for a few minutes, worshipping her delicious breasts with his mouth and tongue in a way that made her feel like she might burst into flames. She continued to pant and bit her lip to keep from shouting, but the noises continued to escape her as he continued on. She had never imagined he would make feel like so indescribably incredible and he could make her so easily lose control of herself.

He eventually decided he had to go lower and taste, smell, just experience her very core. She did not stop him with his plan, even though she did not want him to move from where he was, and then she realized what he planned. Gasping, she went rigid as nervousness settled in her stomach once more.

“Sesshomaru…” Kikyo said hesitantly. She knew he was about to do something unorthodox because of where he placed himself.

“Calm down, you deserve the attention and I want to taste you,” he commented, looking up at her with slightly clouded golden eyes. He appeared intoxicated and she was the reason for that.

The ebony-haired miko did not know how to argue against his point and he was not planning to stop even if she found a way to debate the issue. Ecstasy washed over Kikyo like a tidal wave when he got to where he wanted to be, inhaling deeply before diving in. She screamed Sesshomaru’s name to the mountains as he kissed the center of her being. She tasted like heaven to him and the sound of her calling her name was sweet, beautiful music to his ears. He would make sure she did it again. He wanted to hear it all night long as he touched her soul.

She tried to quiet down again by biting her lip as he continued on. Tears gathered in her eyes because she had never felt something so fantastic before. She cut her bottom lip with her teeth because she just lost control.

“Sessh…” she whimpered as she finally lost hold of her lip and her body shuddered with pleasure.

Sesshomaru watched her through the whole process, smirking to himself when she muttered his name. It was a stunning sight to see her wiggling, trying her best to remain somewhat in control of herself. He could see she cried tears of happiness and pleasure. This was a magnificent sight.

He kept going to make sure she just lost all control. He wanted her to throw control to the wind, casting it aside as if it was an affront to her whole nature. She did not need control tonight. She could let loose and experience what the world had to offer. She did just that.

By the time Sesshomaru shed his clothes, Kikyo did not have the energy to be worried about what happening. She begged for him to touch her before he even worked his way out of his gear, but her pleas got him to work faster. She did not need to tell him twice. He was burning to know what it would be like to be with her now.

Now, it was his turn to try and remain in control. He had no idea she would feel as she did and he almost completely lost it once he was where they both desired him to be. She hissed and exhaled slowly once he was sheathed inside of her. He waited for her to give a signal that she was ready for him to continue and once the signal came, he began to move, gently and slowly.

“Sesshomaru,” she whimpered, shifting to meet his tender movement.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said once more before leaning down to kiss her.

He was careful with her through out the night, but he worked her out. It was in a good way as far as she was concerned. He failed to recognize he had a different stamina than she did, but she did not bother to inform him because she had the time of her life. She just clung to him as he took her to the edge and over more times than she would be able to recall. All he wanted was for her to hold onto him, for her to be as close as possible, as he took her to places that neither of them experienced before.

-8-8-8-8-

Kikyo groaned as she woke up. She felt so sore, but unbelievably satisfied. She rested on a very warm body while some busy fingers brushed against her bare side. She looked up and noticed Sesshomaru staring at her.

“Morning,” the chocolate-eyed woman greeted her lover in low, almost drowsy voice. She smiled slightly as she spoke.

“Morning,” he replied with a small smile of his own. He could not help his expression thanks to last night.

“I can’t believe we slept here. Oh, we have to get back to Rin,” Kikyo realized in a slight panic. She was about to shoot up and possibly run back to the house stark naked, but Sesshomaru halted such actions.

“Calm down, the sun’s only just started coming up. She’ll sleep for at least another hour,” he pointed out in a reassuring tone. He pulled her close to him to keep her relaxed, which worked wonders. She calmed down immediately and believed him instantly about their daughter.

“Like you know what an hour is,” she teased; she could not believe that she was joking with him.

“I’ve got it somewhat figured out. We’ve got time. Let’s go visit your little hot spring,” he suggested.

Kikyo glanced at the demon. She did not want to tell him that she was doubtful she could stand up. He did not plan on her walking anyway. He gathered her in his arms and carried her to the hot spring. He would return for their clothes later, but for the moment he figured they should clean up. Although when they hit the water, he started things to get them messy all over again. She did not offer up any resistance, only encouragement.

-8-8-8-8-

By the time that Rin woke up, both of her parents were back at the house. She greeted them with smiles as she rose from the bed. As far as the child could tell, everything was the same. Jaken knew something was up, especially since he had to watch the girl all night long. He had also heard something that sounded suspiciously like passionate screaming last night. He gazed at the priestess with contempt in his eyes from the moment that she came in.

“Jaken,” Sesshomaru said out of the blue it seemed.

“Yes, master?” the forest-green demon inquired. His expression perked up, thinking that he might be useful to his master rather than acting as a babysitter or a toy for that little brat.

“Stop looking at her like that or leave,” the powerful demon ordered. He would not allow anyone, especially his servant, to look at his woman as if there were something wrong with her.

The goblin seemed incredulous to what he was hearing, so much so that he was sure that he had not heard right. “What?” Jaken asked.

“Either fix your face or leave,” the fallen angel stated plainly and he would not repeat himself.

“But, master—” the small toad attempted to protest.

“You heard me,” Sesshomaru interjected.

The imp mumbled heatedly under his breath because of his anger and the fact that he had no place to direct that building fury. He detested that human wench and her little brat. Thanks to them, he had been turned into a babysitter and a toy. He was a demon for crying out loud. He was the proud vassal of possibly the most powerful demon on the planet and they wasted their time with a pathetic human priestess that claimed his master was the father of her bizarre child. He could not help being angry and he wished he could do something about the horrible miko, but that would vex his master and he was not looking to do something so foolish. It would be like committing suicide.

Sesshomaru heard his servant grumbling, of course, but he did not pay the annoying creature any mind. It was not his concern as long as Jaken kept his anger to himself. It was not like he was forced to stay there anyway. The little toad was there voluntarily, but he seemed to be under the impression that he was there as a necessity.

The silver-haired demon’s attention was drawn from Jaken to Rin as the girl ran over to him. She grinned up at Sesshomaru for no reason, except for the fact that she was very glad that he was there. He rubbed the top of her head, which caused her to grin wider. It was like his acknowledgment was the highlight of her day, which secretly delighted him. It really did not take much to make the girl happy and just being around her parents seemed to be all that she needed to smile.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru thought he should see what powers or abilities Rin might have inherited since she was half-angel and Kikyo had told a couple of tales of her doing strange things. He considered for a moment she might not have inherited anything from him aside from the pointy ears because she looked so much like her mother. He did not have much of a problem with that. Of course, he would like a piece of him to have made it into their child’s makeup.

The fallen angel actually would have felt better if Rin did not inherit any sort of celestial powers because he was not sure what that power might cause her to do and the less that she could do, the better things would be forever. Offspring of angels did not have good track records when it came to sanity, namely none of them were sane for long and they tended to abuse their powers. Now, because angelic offspring did not seem to know how to act, they did not have a good survival record. In fact, they were all killed at some point in time, typically by angels. So, logically, if Rin had no powers, there would be no reason for angels to come looking to destroy her.

But, Rin had talents. Sesshomaru could not pinpoint how her powers might get her into any trouble, though. From what he could tell, she had inherited his healing abilities, but it went beyond her being able to heal herself and others. She seemed to have the touch of life. As she practiced her abilities, under his watchful eye of course, she began making flowers sprout up and bloom out of nothing it seemed. She always grinned and giggled whenever she did something so extraordinary. She amused herself more often than not.

“Look, Daddy, look!” Rin implored the demon as she drew a circle in the dirt and dozens of little flowers popped up.

“You’re getting good at that,” Sesshomaru commented, his pride coming into his tone just a little bit. He was very proud of her and glad she was his daughter.

Rin was a fast learner. Her father had only been teaching her for about a month and she could control her powers fairly well, for a four-year-old anyway. Although, her new hobby was pointing out that she would be five very soon, not that he understood what that had to do with anything.

She was a talented child and he did not see how she might attract the attention of archangels with her interests. She was what he expected of a combination of him and Kikyo. Well, mostly what he expected because he did not think that their child would be so jovial and hyper, but that was fine. She was fine. For the time being, everything was all right.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: the family goes to town and Rin gets the fright of her life.


	18. A quiet storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

18: A quiet storm

Kikyo no longer went into town alone. Sesshomaru did not like that since he was quite aware the people in town did not like her much. Their dislike seemed to grow more with every passing day. He wondered if their attitudes toward her were in part due to Naraku influencing their hearts because of his judgment on Kikyo. He knew her punishment continued because she did not and would not repent. She had waited for him, so they could be together again, so she obviously did not feel any remorse or regret for her actions. He concurred with her thoughts.

So, Sesshomaru accompanied Kikyo whenever she went into town, just case someone wanted to be stupid and actually consider touching his beloved in some way. Whispers abound when people saw her walking around with the regal-looking demon. He did not like a lot of the things that he heard. The only thing that kept him from tearing most people in half was the woman that they talked so harshly and disgustingly about. Kikyo would not allow Sesshomaru to go after any of the villagers, no matter what they said about her and they certainly did say some things.

“Their words are not true, so you shouldn’t let them bother you,” Kikyo told the demon.

“While that is true, they have no right to say such horrible lies about you. You haven’t done anything wrong,” he countered.

“No, I haven’t, but their words are still not true and they haven’t hurt me yet,” she stated. He frowned, realizing they could have this argument until the end of time.

The petite priestess entered the home of one of the villagers. She had to check on an old woman. Sesshomaru hated going into the houses of the villagers. He did not like the aromas that always coated the place, especially when he could smell that someone was ill. _Humans are such sickly creatures_ , he thought; whenever he spoke or thought of humans, he never included Kikyo. She was not human as far as he was concurred. She was Kikyo, _his_ Kikyo.

“To think, a young, beautiful girl like you gallivanting around with a demon,” the old woman that Kikyo checked on commented as soon as she caught sight of the platinum-haired male. She was speaking to the priestess, of course. She would never waste her time addressing a demon.

The miko did not respond. She had learned how to ignore most people very well through out her life and especially in the past five years. Nothing that had ever been said to her had yet to get a rise out of her and many just all-around horrible things were always said about her. She made sure that the old woman had enough of the medicine that she required, which was one of the reasons that Kikyo was there for. She also had to do a check-up on the old lady to make sure that her condition was improving. The silence did not stop the old woman from continuing on, loudly sharing her unwanted opinion.

“Are you his prisoner or something? Is he forcing himself on you?” the old woman inquired with a nosy eyebrow arched. She appeared very interested in knowing the answer to that question, but Kikyo was not willing to supply her with such a thing.

“What?” Sesshomaru growled angrily, almost raising his voice from his fury. How dare that wrinkled wench suggest such a thing! He would never lower himself to forcing the priestess to stay with him and he certainly would never force her to lay with him. Kikyo was with him because she desired to be and that was the way things were supposed to be.

Kikyo put her hand up to signal for Sesshomaru to not get too bent out of shape. The last thing that she needed was for him to frighten the old woman to death. The town would be up in arms, even if he had not touched the old woman. Sesshomaru frowned deeply, but he did not make a move on the old biddy. _I hate humans_ , he silently huffed while turning away from the decrepit female.

“I mean, really, dearie, if he is doing that, you can tell me. I’ll hold him off and you can get away from that evil demon,” the old woman suggested to Kikyo. She was being quite serious and the miko could hardly believe it. The old woman could hardly walk around her house thanks to her illness and there she was offering to hold off a powerful demon.

“I think we’re all fine where we are,” Kikyo replied in her usual tone as she went to see if the old woman had been using the medicinal powders that she had told her to. She told the senior to take the powder with her tea, but the woman was stubborn about it because she claimed that it ruined her tea.

“Ah-ha!” the old woman said as if she had solved a difficult who-dun-it, as if she had Kikyo, who did not even notice that she was in some kind of trap. “I knew it. Everybody knew it. You’re fornicating with this here demon,” the old woman declared with a cackle as she pointed at Sesshomaru.

Kikyo did not reply again. It seemed that anytime the villagers saw her standing near a man, the rumor sprang up that she was sleeping with him. She did not have the energy to debate them. Besides, she was sleeping with Sesshomaru. She just did not see how it was any of their business. She did not like it being referred to “fornication” either. The term had such negative connotations attached to it and there was nothing wrong with what she was doing with Sesshomaru, in her opinion. They were consenting adults that cared deeply for each other, that held affections for each other. There was nothing wrong with what they were doing, especially considering they were just doing what any ordinary man and woman would if they were in love. _We are not wrong_.

“Don’t you have any pride, girl? Sleeping with this piece of filth demon? Opening your legs to any man that comes by,” the old woman stated rather bluntly with disdain in her voice. She might as well have ended her proclamation with called Kikyo a whore from the tone in her voice. Kikyo did not react to the words or to the tone, but the demon with her did.

“Enough!” Sesshomaru barked in a pure fury while turning back to the wrinkled old bat that seemed to have a death wish in his opinion. No one would speak to the mother of his child and the reason for his fall any way that she pleased, especially not some hunchbacked, funny-smelling, false-teeth-having, one-foot-in-the-grave, two-seconds-from-death wretch that required his lover’s help just to keep her degenerating existence ongoing.

“Sessho,” Kikyo said in a gentle tone, hoping to calm him down.

“I won’t let her talk to you like that,” he argued heatedly, his golden eyes shining from his anger.

“Let the woman entertain herself. It’s not like anyone is listening to her,” Kikyo commented, essentially tell him to just ignore her.

Sesshomaru scowled deeply and let the woman run her mouth without interrupting her. He turned his back to the old lady again, folding his arms across his chest in the process to express his displeasure of her words. He tried his best to ignore her and her loose lips, even though she kept referring to him as if he was some sort of terrible, absolutely evil rapist. She also casually abused Kikyo verbally, but the miko did not react in any manner to all of the noise. She calmly did her job and then left the house. The demon glanced at the old woman before following Kikyo out. The raven-haired female smiled at him a bit and took his hand, hoping that the gestures would lift his spirits.

“You don’t have to take an old woman’s words so personally,” Kikyo informed him while making circular motions on his hand with her thumb. Her soft, loving touch helped settle his fury a bit.

“You should leave here,” he suggested, which he had done plenty of times before. He wanted to take her away from the hate-filled town and give her anything that her heart desired. He wanted to show her the world and he wanted to see the world again with her and their daughter by his side. He desired to give them everything he believed that they deserved, which he thought was much more than a little shack in the woods. They deserved the world on a platter if that was what they wanted in his opinion.

“These people need me,” she replied while slightly motioning around the town and he had expected those words.

“They hate you,” he countered, which she expected.

“I know.”

Sesshomaru frowned for the umpteenth time that day. _Damn her beautiful self-less nature_ , he quietly complained. He would not stop trying to get her to leave the village some day soon, though. He truly believed they needed to get away from there and move on to some place much better, some place Kikyo was appreciated, and some place their child could enter without fear. He guessed he would have to wait for her to agree with that thought before they could start a new journey in life.

The couple walked through the village on their way back to the house and they went by a stand that held pinwheels. The platinum-haired demon noticed them spinning as a small breeze blew by. He stopped to stare at them, forcing Kikyo to stop since they were holding hands.

“What?” the chocolate-eyed woman asked as she noticed him staring at the pinwheels.

“For Rin,” he replied as he picked up one of the more colorful pinwheels. Their child would delight in such a plaything.

“We can’t afford it,” Kikyo pointed out. Not only could they not afford the pinwheel, but even if they could, the merchant would not sell to them.

The golden-eyed demon looked down at his woman; currency was not in his mental database. He merely held up the pinwheel and then turned his sharp eyes to the stand owner, daring the man to stop him from taking the toy for his daughter. The stand owner gulped when he saw the look in the demon’s face.

“Take it, please!” the human male implored them with an anxious look in his face while hiding behind his stand, as if that would keep the pale demon from harming him if Sesshomaru chose to do so.

“Sessho,” Kikyo sighed in protest as they continued on their way.

“What? He gave it to me,” Sesshomaru argued because she would look at his actions as stealing and he knew how she felt about that. “Rin will enjoy it,” he added to convince the priestess to stop looking at him with a disapproving spark in her cocoa eyes.

“You’re going to spoil her,” Kikyo decided to argue that point. She and Sesshomaru would not see eye to eye on stealing in the way that he did it, namely through intimidation where people did just give things to him to get him to go away.

“You’re one to talk,” he countered in almost a playful tone, even though he thought that was the best comeback that he could offer. He knew he had her too from the brief way that her gaze fell from his.

Kikyo decided to stop arguing at that point. Sesshomaru had seen her with Rin enough to know she cuddled their baby as best she could. But, Rin was her baby, so she felt she could cuddle her as much as she pleased, especially since she was not bothering anyone when she did it. She did not want Sesshomaru terrorizing the villagers to get Rin toys and things of that nature. But, she supposed it was something that they were going to have to talk about since she had just lost the debate about it.

“Mommy! Daddy!” Rin greeted the couple with her usual monstrous grin as they returned home. She hugged each of them.

Kikyo returned the hug with just as much enthusiasm as Rin while Sesshomaru merely caressed the top of the child’s head, which was good enough for the girl. He then handed her the pinwheel from the horrified merchant. Rin’s chocolate eyes lit up with childish glee. He doubted he would have gotten a more enchanting reaction if he had given her diamonds.

“Where’d you get this from?” Rin asked in an excited voice as she spun the toy with her fingers instead of letting the wind do the work. She did not know how the thing was supposed to work, but she was fascinated by the colors and spinning, which he expected.

“In town,” Sesshomaru answered.

“Can I go to town with you one day?” Rin requested with a curious twinkle in her eyes. She had been getting more and more curious about the place since both of her parents now went there and left her with Jaken. She wanted to see what was in town and why it called both of her parents away from her. “I want to see all of the people and all of the nice things!” the child declared with a grin.

“What do you know about town?” Kikyo asked with a bit of a smile, just teasing their baby a little bit. She really did not think that their child should know much about the village, except that they went there every few days. Rin had never even seen the town.

“Mister Jaken told me all about it!” Rin grinned widely with her chest puffed out. She was proud to be able to answer her mother’s question.

Sesshomaru turned to glance at the little toad, wondering what kind of ideas the tiny fool might have been putting into their child’s head. Jaken gulped and wisely slipped away behind the house to avoid a thrashing at the moment. He cowered behind the wood and hoped that if his master did come for him that annoying priestess would save him, as she had done several times in the past. Just because Kikyo saved Jaken from some sound beatings did not mean that he liked her, though.

Both demons knew Kikyo did not want Rin going into town; Sesshomaru was aware it was because Kikyo did not trust the villagers. Some of the people believed that Rin was a hanyou and Kikyo did not know how they might react to seeing her, even if she appeared rather human, especially with her ears being covered by her hair. While the priestess did not believe in using her bow against humans, she would use it to defend Rin. She did not want things to come to that and she did not want to chance Rin getting hurt in any way, shape, or form. So, Sesshomaru could not believe his idiotic servant was putting ideas in his daughter’s head, making her curious about the town and desiring to go there.

Sesshomaru was about to make a move against Jaken. He seriously doubted Kikyo would stop him since it was in regard to their daughter’s safety. Before he could get to the little sniveling toad, Rin spoke up and distracted him.

“So, may I come to town with you, please?” Rin requested in her most polite tone, hoping that it would help them give into her desire.

“Angel, we’ve been—” Kikyo started to answer, but Sesshomaru injected with a very surprising answer.

“Of course you can come,” the demon said to their daughter.

“What?” both mother and daughter asked in complete shock, their eyes open wide in the same expression.

“Of course you can come,” he repeated.

“Sessho,” Kikyo tried to protest, but their child cheered loudly and jubilantly.

“Thank you!” Rin grabbed her father tightly around the leg. It was as high as she could reach since she was only just a little girl and he was tall.

Kikyo decided not to dash their child’s happy dreams at the moment. She figured she would speak to Sesshomaru because she wanted to know why he would agree to let Rin go into the town when he knew how she felt about that idea. She did not want Rin in town or near town or even to see town from some distance.

Sesshomaru knew Kikyo would want to discuss his decision and talk things over. They had to wait for Rin to go to sleep because they did not want to chance her hearing that they disagreed on something. They did not want to upset their child if it could be helped, especially not when she was beaming with joy over her gift and the fact that she was going to be able to go in town.

-8-8-8-8-

“You do know that you’re worrying too much,” Sesshomaru commented, speaking to Kikyo. They had decided on taking a stroll through the woods that night to talk. It started out as a quiet walk with them just enjoying being together, but then he spoke up.

“I don’t want to chance anything. She’s only a baby,” Kikyo pointed out in her usual tone to avoid getting into a real argument.

“I’ll protect her,” he replied as if that was obvious and, to him, it was. She had no doubt about his ability to protect their baby, but there was more to it.

“I don’t want anyone to get hurt,” she continued.

“You think some human could hurt me?” he asked with a slight frown. He was insulted by the very thought of that.

“Of course not. I don’t want you to hurt some human,” she clarified her stance. She did not want any unnecessary blood to be spilled, which she was almost certain would happen with Sesshomaru around and their daughter in town.

“You care for these people too much,” he sighed, sounding almost tired. She was a troublesome creature because of her heart, but he was certain that such traits were part of why he was attracted to her. It added to the fact that he could not understand her and because of that, he was still curious of her.

“I have been taking care of them for a long time,” she pointed out. It was only natural in her opinion for her to care about the townspeople because she had been administering to them for so many years. She had invested a lot of her time in making sure that those people were healthy and safe.

“So, you would play to the prejudices and make our daughter live in the shadows for these people?” he inquired in disbelief. He would call her a spineless coward if she dared to confirm his accusation.

“I don’t want to hurt them if they manage to get her in some way. If they make her so much as frown, it would kill me on the inside. She’s so happy and they’re just so cruel. I can take the words. I know why they say such things, but she doesn’t. She’ll want to play and talk and they’ll cut her down in any way they can. I don’t want her to get hurt,” Kikyo argued in a forceful, but tearful tone.

She could suffer through all of the harsh words, accusations, glares, and gestures. She did not care what the people thought of her as long as she could return home to her daughter’s innocent smile. Rin would not able to take the glares, barks, unfair charges, and all-around profane behavior of the villagers that were sure to come her way if she entered the village. She would not understand, but she would pick up on the mood and it would probably crush her spirit. Kikyo was not sure what she would do to those people if they upset her innocent, sweet baby girl.

Sesshomaru sighed and embraced Kikyo. He had not meant to vex her with the decision or his words. He supposed he did not think things through completely. He had no problem with hurting humans, especially if they decided to harm Rin in someway, but he supposed a person dedicated to aiding humans might have a problem with that. But, at some point in time, Kikyo was going to have to let go and allow Rin have some kind of experience with the world, he thought.

The priestess did accept the hug, finding comfort in his arms as usual. She buried her head in his strong chest. She calmed down after a few seconds of being held by him and he felt that it was safe to start talking again.

“You can’t let Rin live in a bubble,” the demon pointed out in a whisper.

“She’s only four,” Kikyo riposted in a low tone.

“But, she’ll be five real soon,” he said, knowing that such words would lift her spirits.

Kikyo could not help laughing because that was Rin’s favorite line lately. “I just want her to remain untainted for a little while longer. I want her to remain a child a little while longer. I want her to keep her spirit.”

“Then take her from this place to where people don’t hate her for no reason at all. You both deserve so much better than this and if you let me, I will give you everything you desire, but it’s not here,” he argued.

“They will always hate her,” the ebony-haired female said tearfully. No matter where they went, she knew her daughter would meet harshness and cruel dislike because she would always be viewed as a hanyou.

“Will they?” he asked.

“She’s different, Sesshomaru. They will always see her as different. No one will accept her,” Kikyo informed him. People would look at Rin as a hanyou, even though she was not. They would assume she was because of who her parents were and they would treat her as an outcast because of that.

“I will make them accept her. I will give her a place where she can be herself and not have to worry about such foolishness,” Sesshomaru strongly declared. It was like his words could not be crushed with any weapon in existence.

“And how will you do that?” she asked to humor him. She did not think that true acceptance could be forced upon people. They would have to take the time to get to know Rin to sincerely accept her. She doubted many people would ever do that, though.

“I would take over their lands and make them accept her or answer to me. I would make her rule over them and they would have to obey her. She deserves better than having to hide in a thicket every time someone walks a few feet from your home. You deserve to not have to fear for her safety or leaving her alone when she gets older. You should be able to take her wherever she wishes to go without having to worry about people trying to harm both of you. I will give you that if you let me,” he stated.

“Sessho…” Kikyo was actually speechless. Although she did not approve of his oppressive plan, no one had ever shown such concern for her and that touched her.

Sesshomaru did not require her to say anything. He leaned down and kissed his petite woman, trying to bring her some comfort and assurance through his touch. It worked wonders and she clung to him, as was becoming her habit. He would protect her. He would protect their daughter. He then glanced up suddenly; he thought that he smelled something or someone rather foul.

“Sesshomaru,” Kikyo said because of his sudden movement.

“I thought that someone was there,” Sesshomaru explained.

Kikyo looked around, abruptly feeling like she could sense someone. They both focused on the same place in the sky and Naraku decided to disappear with a smirk cemented on his face at that point. The couple then turned back to each other and silently decided to leave the area. They went back to their daughter, just in case.

-8-8-8-8-

“Just what the hell are you doing?” Kagura asked the adversary angel as she appeared next to him. He was always up to something in her opinion. Some schemes just took longer to manifest themselves than others.

“Nothing for you to concern yourself with. I’m just researching something,” Naraku answered in a dismissive tone, waving her away. He thought Kagura was just about the most annoying and nosy angel in existence, which he figured was due to the fact that she was coming closer and closer to falling. It was not a secret she was not long for their world. Although, she did not seem very aware of it, but the fallen was usually the last to know.

“She’s not yours anymore. You judged her,” Kagura pointed out. _Are all adversaries such unmovable assholes?_ She was actually thankful not being created as an adversary. She would rather scrap the bottom of the angelic ranks than to be so hell-bent on ruining a human’s life. There were better things to do.

“I’ve gotten permission to continue on with that sinner and her abomination,” he informed the foul-mouthed guardian angel. He sounded so smug about it, like he knew that would get to her.

“What?” Kagura shouted in disbelief. Her ruby eyes were wide from shock. _Who the hell just gave him permission to torment Kikyo more than he already did?_ “She’s already been judged! They can’t just keep judging and punishing her until something sticks.”

“Judgment is to make the human see the error of her ways. She has not, so she will be judged and punished once more.”

“That’s not fair,” she argued.

He chuckled. “Let’s see what darkness lurks in the souls of these humans and in her. After all, all humans are only beings of darkness, all cast out of the light.”

“Not her,” Kagura argued with more passion than she should have had. That went by her though because she was not thinking of herself.

That woman and her child were light without a hint of darkness, as far as Kagura could tell anyway. They deserved nothing that Naraku had to offer, yet he had been granted permission to torment them further. She did not see what the hell those folks in the higher offices were doing. Certainly there were other humans out there that deserved judgment and punishment. She felt like it was official: the Heavens were fucking screwy.

“All humans are darkness,” Naraku insisted, which threw off the guardian angel’s thoughts.

“All humans are not,” she growled. She worked with more than enough humans to know that not all of them were darkness. She had a few human charges that showed her why humans were the favorites. Maybe they all were not wonderful, glowing marks of beauty, but some were, like Kikyo and her child.

“Their darkness will devour them, devour her for her sins,” Naraku said.

Kagura only frowned; yeah, the Heavens definitely were fucking screwy. The humans’ Garden, though it did not make more sense, was still such a better place to her. Someplace where she would not have to deal with crazy rules and she could live for herself. Maybe Sesshomaru was on to something.

-8-8-8-8-

Rin giggled as she darted through the streets of the village. She was so overwhelmed just from being out of the woods that she had to keep moving in her opinion. She had never seen so many people before, did not know so many people existed, or such wonderful buildings existed, or there were so many different types of everything and it was so amazing. Everything was so amazing and so incredible.

“Rin!” Kikyo called for what had to be the millionth time as she tried to gather her daughter back to her side again. She looked rather stressed, her hair already a mess, lines under her eyes, and they had hardly been in the town for five minutes.

“Don’t worry, I still see her,” Sesshomaru said. He walked with Kikyo, but kept a good eye on their energetic child.

“I told her not to run off like this,” Kikyo sighed, putting a hand to her forehad. She was not sure if she would survive the trip into the village if Rin kept bolting off because of something catching her eye. Her heart just was not able to take it.

“Don’t worry, I can see her. She’s all right,” he attempted to assure the concerned mother.

“Are you sure?” Kikyo asked with anxiety that only a mother could muster. She peered into the crowds and tried to spot some piece of their child.

“I see her. It’s all right,” he continued to try to assure the miko while wrapping an arm around her shoulder to help her believe his words and to calm her down. He thought they might have to leave before Kikyo just died of worry.

The demon could see Rin clearly, even with all of the people between them. She was just running and jumping around like the little spark plug she was. She turned a corner, which her father noted, but he did not hurry along. Rin came across a boy, who was weeping. She made a puzzled face as she approached him.

“What’s wrong?” the cocoa-eyed child inquired with concern in her little voice.

“It’s my dog. He’s dead!” the little boy wailed. He looked like he was a few years older than she was. He might have been about seven or eight years old, which she thought was amazing. She always thought it was just her, a baby as her mother put it, and then adults, but he showed there were stages in between, like the forest animals. He seemed terribly distressed over his lost pet.

Rin turned her deep chocolate eyes to the beast that he was crying over. Rin agreed; the dog was dead. She did not see why he was weeping. Things died all of the time; she saw that in the woods almost every day.

“Why are your eyes raining?” Rin asked.

“Because my dog died,” he answered in a huff, feeling like she was bothering him with such a stupid question.

“But, animals always die,” she pointed out nonchalantly. Her eyes squinted just a bit because she was perplexed by his behavior since it was rather common for things to die.

“But, I’ll miss him!” he wailed as more tears fell from his closed eyes.

Rin nodded because she understood that much. She remembered when her mommy missed her daddy; her mommy’s eyes sometimes rained back then. But, her mommy’s eyes never rained now because her daddy was back. She bet the boy would stop weeping if his dog came back. Rin grinned widely.

“It’s okay,” Rin declared and she laid her hands on the deceased beast. Her hands glowed green for a moment and then a few seconds later, the dog rose to his feet. He barked merrily.

The boy fell back as the dog turned to him. The beast yelped happily, but the boy screamed in sheer terror. He ran off in pure fear, which Rin did not understand. She figured the boy would want to take his dog with him. She decided not to think too much of it. She walked on and the dog followed her instead of its master. She did not object because she liked animals.

“There she is!” someone shouted while pointing at Rin. A crowd of people quickly converged and gathered around the girl, closing in on her.

“Demon!” several people screamed and they started throwing things at the child, which stunned her.

“Where’s a demon?” Rin asked in a bemused tone as she tried to avoid getting hit with sticks, rocks, and almost anything else that could be a projectile.

“Demon!” they continued to shout and to point and to hurl things at her.

“I’m not a demon,” Rin objected with a scrunched up face as they advanced on her.

She recognized the anger and hate in their eyes on instinct. Her heart pounded in her chest and her stomach flipped. Fear coursed through her as they continued to close in on her, hollering about how she was a demon and throwing things at her. She trembled in horror as the objects smashed into her. _Ow, it hurts. Why are they hurting me?_

“Mommy!” Rin cried out, praying for her mother to come protect her from the obviously bewildered and terrifying people.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Sesshomaru deals with the villagers and they deal with him in return.


	19. Remnants of joy and disaster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.

19: Remnants of joy and disaster

“All humans are just creatures of darkness that were cast out of the light to be placed in a garden where they should be buried,” Naraku stated soundly as he watched the villagers from a great distance.

Humans were interesting creatures to the adversary angel. He judged them and used them to enforce that judgment. They were their own worst enemies because they seemed to be nothing more than sinful creatures and seemed to enjoy two things. Their own pleasure and someone else’s misery, all of which was made possible from this great gift of theirs – freewill. It was a gift that only brought more misery and punishment to them because it caused them to sin. It was quite the phenomena in his opinion.

-8-8-8-8-

Rin shook, trembling really. Her eyes were wide, taking in everything going on around as tears welled up in them. It was all chaos and shouting, making her head hurt. Her heart pounded so heavy in her chest that it hurt. Her lungs seemed to be copying her legs, suffering from paralysis since she could not move or breathe.

The little girl was so very afraid and it was a new experience for her, like everything else that day. She had just been allowed to go into town, which she had thought would be great. It had been excellent for a few minutes. Everything seemed so wonderfully new and bright to her. She wanted to see every sight that she could, touch everything that she could, and talk to as many people as possible. But, then the day turned on her after she thought that she helped a little boy that lost his dog. She had brought the canine back to life for him to get him to stop crying and after that, the day crumbled around her as far as she could tell.

All of the villagers screamed at Rin and hurled things at her. All the while they called her a demon. She was not a demon, she had insisted while trying her best to avoid getting hit by the items flying her way. She tried explaining to them that she was an angel; her mother had told her so. They did not listen to her and continued to bark loudly while trying to hurt her, so now she was just utterly terrified of them. She closed her eyes and began crying for the first time as far as she knew because she did not know what was going on. And then suddenly, all of the abuse stopped.

“Angel!” Kikyo said as she grabbed her frightened daughter in her arms. She held the trembling child to her tightly to assure her that everything was fine now.

“Mommy!” Rin cried harder as she threw her arms around Kikyo’s neck. The little girl buried herself in her mother’s chest and continued weeping in the safety of her mother’s arms. Kikyo frowned and then glanced at Sesshomaru.

“I’ll handle it,” the demon declared calmly while raising one clawed hand. It was his fault, after all. He had let Rin out of his sight for a couple of seconds, thinking she would be fine and it was Kikyo that he needed to worry about. He did not think the humans would be so cruel as to harm a baby in such a short period of time, but he had learned his lesson. Never have faith in humans to be more than animals.

“Don’t,” Kikyo objected, fearing the worst from the outraged father.

“What?” he asked in a puzzled tone.

“Let’s just get her out of here,” Kikyo replied, practically pleading with her eyes and voice. She did not want their daughter to be bothered anymore in any form.

Sesshomaru glanced at Rin, who was still shaking almost violently while weeping into her mother’s shoulder. He figured it probably would be best to get her away from the harsh villagers considering how upset she was. He did not need to taint her eyes with the sight of the slaughter he planned anyway. Besides, even as bothered as Kikyo was, he would bet that she truly did not want him to murder everyone involved, which he planned on doing just as soon as he got a spare moment.

“Take her,” Sesshomaru commanded the petite miko.

“Sesshomaru,” Kikyo said hesitantly.

“Now,” he growled the order.

Kikyo nodded and pushed through the crowd, who too focused on the golden-eyed demon to notice the mother and daughter as they fled the scene. Sesshomaru wanted their attention to remain on him because he did not want them to go after Kikyo and Rin. While he was certain he could cut them all down long before they touched his ladies, he would rather not do it in front of his ladies. The people would not have received any mercy if they were to go after his ladies and Rin did not need to see a massacre in his opinion. So, he kept their eyes on him by holding up one hand and flexing his claws. After all, he was the one that could hurt the most of them in the least amount of time. He was the one they needed to pay attention to.

“Listen carefully, you pathetic creatures of pure filth, if you touch my daughter or mate in a harmful manner, then it will be the last thing you do aside from scream, feel horrendous agony, and die. Now, try me,” Sesshomaru dared the villagers in a commanding tone while glaring down at them. He wanted them to test him to give him an excuse to murder the lot of them.

No one in the pitiful village spoke up at first or even moved, taking the demon’s word on everything that he had just promised. And then a man with a determined look in his eyes stepped forward; he was not going to be pushed around by some lowly demon, he decided. Sesshomaru did not look intimidated by the man, who was large and muscle bound. The man had a sword on his hip and he put his hand on the hilt, as if he was threatening the platinum-haired demon in some way.

“We won’t take orders from a demon for the sake of his bastard child and whore of a mate,” the man declared arrogantly. There was a smug look of pride in his brown eyes and he tilted his head upward as if flaunting his perceived superiority.

Sesshomaru did not change his expression in any way and stepped toward the man, who quickly drew his blade. The man obviously believed that he would be able to cut down the demon. Sesshomaru figured the fool might as well make a good example, so he threw out his arm as the man pulled his sword.

Everyone in the crowd was silent for a moment and the man’s blade fell to the ground. The man then gasped as blood gushed from his freshly slit throat. The man fell to the dirt, creating a muddy puddle with his escaping life force. The people crowded around gasped in fear. They all quivered like leaves in a breeze at the power of the demon before them, the demon that could fell a man with a mere flick of his wrist; their eyes were not swift enough to catch a glimpse of his youki energy whip that had downed the haughty man. They were all cemented to the ground because of their fright and because of the fallen angel that looked to slay them all. He would not have to even turn his head to do the dirty deed because of the way they just stood there in a circle.

“Anyone else wish to be brave?” Sesshomaru inquired and the people remained quiet. “I thought as much. I’m feeling generous because of my mate’s feelings toward you idiots, so go about your business,” the demon commanded and the people quietly obeyed, quickly leaving the area before he changed his mind.

Sesshomaru glanced down at the man that he had slain. Humans, he doubted that he would ever understand the weird, idiotic creatures. They let their emotions cloud their thinking all of the time, in his opinion. Why did they have the gift of rationalizing the world if they were always going to let their emotions reign over them and drive them to make moronic decisions? _Such foolish creatures_ , he thought as he decided to go about his business.

The demon strode off back to the woods, back to his family. He could hear Rin crying before he got to the house. He went into the small house and saw Kikyo against the back wall. She cradled their heartbroken child and whispered comforting words to their little girl. Every few seconds, she caressed Rin’s head or kissed her cheek to help her feel better. Sesshomaru did not say anything; he just went over to them. He embraced the both of them and rested his head in Kikyo’s ebony mane. He rubbed Rin’s back because he saw Kikyo do that and it took an undetermined amount of time, but Rin eventually fell asleep.

“Sesshomaru,” the priestess said in a low voice.

“I didn’t kill anyone that didn’t deserve it,” he replied because he knew she was going to inquire about his actions in the village from when she left.

“How many?” she asked. She knew he was going to kill at least some of the villagers and she doubted she would have been able to stop him had she been there. She felt a little guilty that it did not bother her as much as she believed it should for him to have slain someone.

“One man who tested me.”

“They will fear you and her now,” Kikyo pointed out, even though the people already feared him. If anything though, what happened in the village just made things worse for them instead of easing their troubles.

“As long as they keep their distance, it’s fine by me. I will destroy anyone that considers harming her now,” he stated soundly while rubbing their child’s shoulder for a moment. He glanced down at Rin, her tiny form, and felt so many things. None of which he could explain, but he did not need to. He would savagely rip apart anyone that touched her in a less than friendly manner.

“I suppose this was inevitable, but I wished she didn’t cry,” Kikyo commented while still cradling their snoozing child close to her.

The priestess was so crushed when she saw her baby bawling. It was a horrible pain that raced through her, almost threatening to drop her into the dirt, but she could not fall since Rin needed her. Her body had felt like it was made of mud and steel when she moved, but despite that fact she doubted she had ever moved so quickly in her life to be at her daughter’s side. She had never felt that way before and she never wanted to feel that way again. She could not explain the emotion, but it was a new type of agony that she would not wish on anyone.

It had not helped when she got Rin home, she noticed bruises on the child where objects had struck her. For a moment, Kikyo hated the villagers, hated them with all she was worth. How dare they hurt her baby! But, a light glow covered had Rin and the wounds healed within a minute. Apparently, Rin’s powers worked on her without her needing to think about it. Relief had spread through Kikyo and she just held Rin like it was the last thing she would ever do.

“It’ll be all right,” Sesshomaru assured her. He leaned down and kissed Kikyo’s cheek.

Kikyo only nodded. She stared down at Rin; her angelic face was still stained with her terror induced tears. The sight and memories made the priestess desire to cry herself, but she held her tears in. It was not fair for those people to treat her that way because her baby never hurt a living thing; well, not on purpose anyway since she liked chasing Jaken. Those people did not have any right at all to treat her daughter as they did. They had no right to judge her child. _They have no any right_ , she mentally insisted.

“Do you still wish to stay here?” the demon asked in a very quiet tone. He did not want to chance waking Rin.

“For the moment,” she replied, even though she knew Sesshomaru wanted to just leave immediately, if not sooner. There was something about how he wanted to keep moving, like he just was not made for a complete sedentary life yet. There was so much to do and he wanted to do it with her and their child. She was not sure if she could live that way, but she would probably have to.

“Why?” he asked.

“This is all I have left of my mother, this place. I want to hold onto it, even if those people now wish to be malicious. I just want to stay here for a while longer. To have those memories this vivid for a little while longer.” She believed if she left the house, she would eventually lose some memories of her mother, the only human to ever truly care about her. The thought actually scared her a little and that was why she was not ready to leave the house.

Sesshomaru nodded, even though he hardly understood her reasoning. He, of course, did not have a mother to miss. But, he did not need her reason. He just knew she wanted to stay for now and that was good enough for him. At least they would leave eventually and he would be able to give them a better life.

He remained close to her while she held Rin, occasionally kissing Kikyo’s head to help keep her calm. After a while, the couple fell asleep. The family remained nestled against the back wall of the little house.

-8-8-8-8-

“You’ve got sick hobbies, watching a family while they sleep,” Kagura noted while appearing next to Naraku, who eyed Sesshomaru, Kikyo, and Rin while they slept.

“You’ve got sick hobbies following me around,” Naraku replied and she silently conceded that when he put it that way, he had a point.

“What the hell are you doing?” she inquired, sounding rather annoyed with him.

“My job. Don’t you have one of those anymore?” he countered.

Kagura looked rather insulted by that question; of course, she still had a job. She just had not gotten a new charge to look after. Sometimes, she could go as long as half-a-century without a new charge. She was not about to complain. She was glad she had some free time, so she could keep an eye on Naraku, even though she could not do anything about any of his actions.

“What the hell are you doing here?” the guardian angel demanded with a frown.

“Nothing anymore,” Naraku replied and he vanished.

Kagura furrowed her brow and examined the peacefully resting family. She wondered what painful thoughts the adversary angel had planned for the pale woman and her cutie of a daughter. Damn Sesshomaru’s child for actually being adorable, she thought. _Who the hell thought it was a good idea for him to have a cute baby? But, I guess his woman deserves her. She deserves more for putting up with all of this and waiting for this idiot to show up._

Kagura did not believe it was right to add to Kikyo’s punishment just because she had regained her happiness of being with Sesshomaru. Sure, there was no way in hell that she would get around to repenting her sins if he was there, but maybe she should not have to repent. She had found someone she was devoted to and someone that was devoted to her, which was what most humans wanted, strived for, and seemed to deserve. And the humans that got it were not committing any sin when they got it from each other. That woman and Sesshomaru deserved to be together, in Kagura’s opinion. _Why should this be their sin if others can do it without harm?_

Unfortunately, Kagura’s opinion did not count in any way, mostly because she was a low-ranking guardian angel and she was not supposed to have an opinion anyway. She decided to stop thinking along those lines because it led to a strange place that an angel should not be. It led to developing a will and she was trying her damnedest to not to do that. She vanished from the scene. The family remained asleep.

-8-8-8-8-

Sesshomaru stood in the forest alone, looking out into the vast trees. It was very late at night, but he had could not go back to sleep after he had woken up a couple of hours ago. He thought about Naraku. He wondered what the adversary had been doing, lurking around the house and around his daughter a little while ago. Had that worm been given permission to judge his daughter? He did not see why Rin should be judged. Sure, she was half-human and half-angel, but she lacked all of the maniacal qualities that made such a creature a problem. She was just a gleeful child and he was fairly certain that good-natured personality of hers should keep her safe, unless some archangel tried to be a real jerk. And even then, that archangel would have to later answer to some seraphs and those seraphs would not be happy about a lower-ranking angel acting without orders. The punishment would be severe.

The demon inhaled sharply as small hands wrapped around his waist. He felt his woman press herself against his back, snuggling into his shoulder blade. The feel of her at his back made him feel at peace all of a sudden. He grabbed her hands and raised them to his chest. He put one of her hands in his haori to feel his heartbeat, which she liked doing and he liked feeling.

“Something wrong?” the small woman inquired in a low, concerned voice.

“No, I was just thinking,” he answered evenly.

She continued her questioning. “About?”

“Rin.”

“What about her?” Kikyo asked.

“Just her sunny disposition. She’s a strange child,” he commented. He could not figure out why their daughter was so… cheerful and energetic. He did not think it was a bad thing, only odd.

“You’re wondering why she’s like that,” she guessed. It was something they both wondered every now and then, after all.

“I’m wondering why she’s not like the others,” he replied.

“Because the others were not our baby,” she stated with a small smile that he did not see.

Sesshomaru nodded; he definitely agreed with that. It made sense to him and that was all that he needed for the moment. He decided to lead her back to the house because he did not like leaving their baby alone and she did not either. Sure, Jaken was there, but he was not very competent in their opinions. It did not help matters that the little toad had a bad habit of hollering at their child, especially when he thought they were not paying attention. They would rather be there with their daughter than have Jaken there.

Rin was still asleep when her parents entered the house, which they expected. She rested on the pallet. Kikyo lay down next to her, caressing the girl’s hair. Sesshomaru sat down and stared at them for a long time. _I will give them everything they deserved one day_ _soon_ , he silently promised that to himself. _Kikyo will never have to wait for something again_.

-8-8-8-8-

The golden-eyed demon looked up, smelling a strange aroma approaching the house. It smelled like fire came toward them. At first, he thought it was a forest fire, but then he caught the scent of the villagers along with the blazing aroma. He wondered what they were doing out there in such dangerous woods before the sun was even in the sky. He doubted it was anything good. He stood up, which woke Kikyo up because she had been using his lap as a pillow.

“What are you doing?” Kikyo asked in a slightly dazed tone, rubbing her eyes with one hand.

“Just stay here,” Sesshomaru replied.

The former angel walked outside to get an idea as to what was going on. He saw lights coming toward the house and that caused him to frown. He frowned deeper as Kikyo joined him outside.

“I could’ve sworn I just told you to stay in there,” Sesshomaru commented. At least he now knew where Rin got her selective hearing.

“What do you think they want?” Kikyo asked, as if she could not guess. She could see the lights coming toward them and she knew there were villagers controlling those lights.

“I doubt this is a social call,” Sesshomaru answered, sounding just a little annoyed. _The nerve of those damned foolish villagers!_ _How dare they come out to his family’s area after terrorizing Rin!_ This upset him a great deal, even if they had not done anything yet.

Kikyo stood her ground with Sesshomaru as the villagers made their way through the trees. The regal-looking demon raised his hand, ready to attack obviously. Kikyo put her hand on his and lowered his hand to keep him from assaulting the people before they even did anything. She noticed the villagers’ hostile faces and wondered if she should just let her lover take them down before they did something foolish.

“What’s your business here?” Kikyo asked the people, who were mostly the village men holding torches. They were armed, too, with swords, bows, and tools that easily doubled as weapons, but she spoke to them as if there was nothing wrong. She tried to be civil and keep a cool head, even though they were obviously a mob. It was possible to diffuse the situation, or so she hoped.

“We wish to be rid of your demons,” a man in the front of the group replied in a commanding tone.

Sesshomaru frowned; he did not like the man talking to his woman in such a tone or referring to his daughter as a demon. Rin was an angel and they would know that if they bothered to ask her. His hand flexed because of his displeasure, which Kikyo noticed. She lightly caressed his hand with her fingertips to calm him down as she hoped to settle the matter peacefully if it was possible.

“My demons?” Kikyo echoed with an arched eyebrow. “I don’t recall having any demons.” She apparently did not think of Sesshomaru as a demon; he was just Sesshomaru. And, of course, Rin was an angel.

“Give us the demons!” the people ordered. There was a roar from some of the people in the back of the mob, just to show that they agreed with the people doing the talking. They raised their weapons as a warning to her.

“Leave my home. I will give you nothing,” the miko declared in a powerful tone with a glare to match despite the fact that the pretty much the whole village was at her door and were less than friendly.

She could not believe the nerve of the villagers. They would come to her home with torches and weapons as if she harbored monsters when all she had was her beloved and their child in the house. And then, they actually expected her to give them her loved ones? _Apparently, they are fools_ , she concluded.

“Give us the demons!”

“If you men value your lives, you will return to your homes,” Sesshomaru warned the men.

The tall demon did not wish to discuss anything. He would slaughter all of the imbeciles there if they did not wise up and leave. He doubted they were smart enough to leave, though, as he had come to understand humans were not always the smartest when they were in an emotional mob. It surprised him that the humans could be stupider when in a group than as individuals. More minds should have equaled more thinking, but apparently the reverse took place. Their stupidity just knew no bounds, he figured.

“We don’t want dangerous demons right in our backyard!”

“Then move,” Kikyo remarked dryly. Their backyard was a forest full of dangerous demons; were they really that stupid?

“You get out!” a man yelled.

“Or we’ll make you,” someone else added.

“Interesting,” Sesshomaru commented, holding up his claws on one hand. He would like to see those lowly humans _make_ him do anything.

The men held their weapons higher and in ready positions as an answer to his claws. Most of the men had farming equipment in their hands, but a few of them had trusty swords and a couple of them even had guns. There were a few people with bows and arrows, ready to fire at the drop of a hat.

Kikyo did not like where things were going, mostly because her baby slept in the house behind them and all she needed was one zealot, one wannabe hero, or even one nervous twitch and everything could go straight to Hell in a matter of seconds. Her baby was in danger with such deadly weapons aimed where she was slept and Kikyo would not have any of that. Everyone was just way too tense.

“Leave now,” Kikyo ordered, but her command only made the men tenser and that was not helping. Sesshomaru flexed his claws as the men stood their ground, digging in for the confrontation. The air was hot and thick. The breathing was loud and some shook as they waited for something to happen. Sweat ran down some of the men’s cheeks while Sesshomaru locked eyes on all of them. Insects buzzed around them, landing on some, but no one moved.

“Mommy?” Rin called as she made her way to the doorway of the house. Her voice was a surprise to everyone and arrows went flying in that direction almost immediately. There were gasps and more trembling. No one could believe their eyes and they could only guess what was going to happen once those arrows landed.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: the end.


	20. No Ordinary Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters.
> 
> Also, I’d like to thank everyone for reading this.

20: No Ordinary Love

Kikyo stepped in front of her daughter without thinking, her body acting on instinct, which was fine by her. There was nothing for her to consider. She was a mother and her child was in mortal danger; there were arrows flying toward the little girl thanks to nervous idiots clamoring around their house with weapons in hand. She was close enough to Rin to make sure that none of the weapons touched her and that was what she tried to do.

Sesshomaru flung his arm out, trying to catch all of the projectiles with his energy whip. The priestess gasped in a low tone as a few arrows made it by her beloved and penetrated her body almost soundlessly. The missiles had missed her baby, though, and that was the main point as far as she was concerned. Everyone was in shock as the arrows hit.

Kikyo’s eyes went wide for a quick second as she realized she was wounded. She forgot how to breathe and her whole body seemed frozen in place for a few moments. It seemed to take Kikyo an eternity to collapse to the ground and, once again, no one could believe their eyes.

“Mommy?” Rin gasped as her mother hit the rich dirt with a soft thud. Her childish brown eyes were wide, but confused. What was going on?

Sesshomaru stared down at the body of his lover in disbelief. He watched as her blood stained her clothing and seeped out of the corner of her mouth. His whole body tensed and then his arm trembled from his anger. His eyes bled a sharp, deep crimson over because of the blind, pure fury that washed over him and he shot into the throng of men faster than any bullet they would never get to fire. How dare they injure his woman! How dare they harm the mother of his child! The men tried to flee the enraged demon, but he would not let any of them get away after such a crime. How dare they wound his Kikyo! He would destroy the lot of them without a thought for such an offense.

“Mommy,” Rin said as she dropped to her mother’s side. She was not totally sure what was going on, but it was not good considering the fact that her mother had been wounded.

“It’s okay,” Kikyo lied, forcing out a smile to be more convincing. She was done for, already feeling cold, but there was no way she could tell her little four-year-old such a thing. She would put on a brave face until the end for her baby’s sake.

A small stream of blood was coming from the miko’s mouth, which was rapidly going dry. Her body had been punctured with six arrows; over two dozen had been fired in her child’s direction and Sesshomaru had managed to get rid of most of them. She slowly reached up and weakly caressed her baby’s chubby cheek. _To think, I won’t even get the chance to see my little angel grow up. It’s not fair_. But, alas, that seemed to be the theme of her life.

“I can help, I can help!” the child proclaimed with vigor as she fought back tears.

Rin knew everything was not okay like her mother claimed. She had to do something or she would lose the most important person in her life. She could heal wounds; her daddy had taught her how to do so. Okay, her daddy had taught her how to heal small wounds, but she knew what she was doing. She could even save small creatures’ lives, like the dog in the village, with a little concentration, so with more, she logically assumed she could save her mommy.

Rin attempted to heal the wounds inflicted on her mother, but they took more effort than she was used to. It drained much of her energy and then the wounds opened back up because the arrows were still in her mother’s body. Rin was at a loss very quickly and then thought to pull the arrows out. She yanked on one, causing Kikyo to wince and cough, blood flew from her mouth.

“Okay, okay, okay,” Rin muttered, noticing her actions were hurting her mother, so she immediately stopped.

Brown eyes darted over Kikyo’s body, the child trying to figure out what to do. Nothing came to mind. She could not heal the wounds with the arrows in her mother and she could not pull the arrows out. She burst into tears because her mommy was going to die. Sure, she had once figured that things die everyday and it was no big deal, but her mommy would be gone forever if she died just like everything else. What was she supposed to do without her mommy? She would be lost without her mother.

“Don’t cry, angel,” Kikyo whispered in a gentle tone. She hated seeing her baby cry. She used her last bit of strength to continue on caressing Rin, hoping to comfort the child. Nothing short of her not dying would be a comfort to Rin, though.

“Don’t leave me! Please, don’t leave me,” Rin begged over and over again. She began chanting the words as if they were a prayer that would save her mother’s life and keep the woman from leaving her.

Sesshomaru returned to his ladies to find their daughter weeping over Kikyo. He dropped down next to her and gently cradled her head in his hand. To his credit, he had not a hair out of place and only someone with a sense of smell as keen as his own would know what he had done only yards from the hut if the person saw him now. Rin flung herself onto her father, pleading with him to save her mommy. Sesshomaru stared down at his lover and tried to oblige their daughter by saving Kikyo, but he soon realized that there was nothing that he could do.

The arrows had done too much damage to Kikyo’s vital organs. It would seem that it was her time. _She’s supposed to die now_ , he realized. _Why? Why couldn’t we have more time together? Why can’t she stay with me, with our child? Why can’t we have lives together?_

“Kikyo,” Sesshomaru said in a low voice while trying his best to keep a handle on his emotions. He did not want to lose her anymore than Rin did, but he willed himself not to have a breakdown.

“Yes?” Kikyo replied in a tight voice and then gasped for air.

“Repent,” he quietly implored her.

“What?” she said as she if she did not understand what he requested.

“Repent,” he repeated in a more urgent tone. She needed to repent now.

Kikyo smiled at him, looking quite amused for a woman that was dying. “I cannot,” she sincerely informed him. She was touched he was so worried about her and her soul, but she could not in good conscience repent when she was certain she had done anything wrong. If she repented, she would only be lying. She was not ashamed or sorry to have fallen in love with Sesshomaru and to have had his daughter.

“You must,” he gently urged her. She did not understand, he believed. If she died with her sins still on her soul, she would be cast out of the light and she did not deserve that. She needed to repent before she died.

“How can I? I will always love you. If I repent, it would be a lie,” she replied, forcing out a small smile to ease his worry. She would only be compounding her sins in her opinion if she repented. If loving him was a sin, then she was a sinner and she would always be a sinner because she would always love him. It was as simple as that to her.

“Kikyo,” he said desperately.

“Just take care of our baby. She needs you,” Kikyo reminded him, glancing at their weeping child. She tried to caress Rin, but she could hardly move now.

“Kikyo, don’t,” he begged her, panicking on the inside for the first time ever. He did not want to lose her again. They needed more time together. There were so many things out there to do and he wanted to give her so many things while experiencing the world with her. He did not know what he would do without her. He had plans for them together as a family, but no plans for him and Rin alone. He had no idea how to go about raising Rin on his own.

The miko did not respond. Her body went limp and her eyes stared into nothingness. She was no longer breathing. He could not hear her heartbeat anymore. She had passed with the sins still on her soul because she loved him. She damned herself for him. She even had the nerve to go with that small smile on her face, as if she would not have had things go any other way.

Sesshomaru wanted to be furious, but he could not find it in him. He was too confused and actually saddened to be even the slightest bit angry. He did not know what he should do now. She was gone and their child wept. What was he supposed to do? What? What!

His eyes scanned around the forest, searching for answers. None came. His eyes went to his beloved, hoping against all hope for something, anything. Nothing happened. Kikyo was dead. He pulled her body to him, holding her tightly. Rin pressed herself to Kikyo’s form, crying for her mommy. Sesshomaru again wondered what the hell was he supposed to do now.

“You are a stupid dog, aren’t you?” Kagura commented as she and Kanna appeared a few feet from Sesshomaru and his weeping daughter. His gaze shot over to the angels as soon as they appeared. There was a fire in those golden eyes as they fell upon the angels.

“What do you want, Kagura? Here to collect her soul?” Sesshomaru growled. He could see the two angels almost as if they had physical bodies and with the way he felt at the moment, he would not hesitate to attack them as if they had physical bodies if they tried to touch his beloved. They could not have her soul. She did not repent and he refused to let her be cast out of the light because of him.

“I don’t collect souls. I just got dragged along with her,” Kagura replied, motioning to Kanna, who seemed as detached as ever. It was like she always someone’s damn babysitter, Kagura noted.

“Why?” he demanded.

“Probably because they like tormenting me up there. You know how the higher-ups can be,” the ruby-eyed angel remarked in a lighthearted tone, as if she could care less that he was going through a major crisis right now.

“I won’t let you take her soul,” he informed the two angels in a voice that let them know he was threatening them.

“Why? Because she didn’t repent? Big damn deal.” Kagura scoffed and waved the whole notion off. “The light’s not as great as everyone makes it out to be, eh?” she commented and the fallen angel growled again because of his anger. She definitely was not helping the situation. “Look, Kanna’s going to go collect those stupid bastards that you killed before coming back over here,” she informed him and the white-haired angel wandered off with her mirror in hand to hold the souls of so many dead men. Kagura looked down at Rin.

Rin was so overwrought from losing Kikyo that she did not make a sound as buckets of tears cascaded down her face. It was like her voice abandoned her in her grief. Her mouth was turned down in a frown and her mouth was also open, but nothing was coming out of it. It was doubtful that she could breathe. Her eyes were closed tight and she secretly hoped this was just a very bad dream. With luck, she would wake up soon and see she was next to her mommy, who would probably be rubbing her back, even in her sleep. Until she woke up though, she would weep. She leaned against her father, but continued to touch her mother.

“Don’t you think you should hug the kid or something?” Kagura suggested to the fallen angel.

“Go away,” Sesshomaru snarled. Honestly, he did not know what to do about Rin. Holding her would not stop the pain that she felt. He was not sure if anything would stop the pain.

“Don’t be such a bastard. You’ll make me miss you,” the guardian angel teased, smiling slightly.

Sesshomaru growled again, almost like a heated animal. Kagura was just as annoying as ever and the only thing keeping him from trying to slice her in half with his claws was the simple fact that he knew he could not harm her. _Damn her intangible form_ , he silently cursed. Damn her for not going away while he endured the worst time of his entire existence. He then growled again, much like an outraged wolf as Kanna returned to the group.

“I won’t let you have her soul,” Sesshomaru informed the angels. He just could not allow them to take his beloved with sins still on her otherwise pure and beautiful soul. He would not let her be damned. He could at least protect her from that.

“You don’t have a say in it,” Kagura pointed out as Kikyo’s soul began to emerge from her body. Her soul was in the form of a small, glowing orb, even though some souls took the form of the human body.

“Don’t!” Sesshomaru ordered in a low snarl. He would have charged them, but Rin clutched him so tightly that he would have hurt her if he moved at all. He just stared at them with contempt as the soul entered Kanna’s mirror. He actually shook because of his fury at the pair and everything that happened.

“Don’t look so offended, Sesshy,” Kagura taunted him with an amused look in her eyes. Maybe she did miss the bastard; it was fun getting on his nerves.

“Kagura, if you ever come onto this Garden, I’m going to cut your time extremely short,” Sesshomaru vowed. She would fall sometime and when she did, he would kill her for taking his beloved’s soul while knowing she had not repented.

“Such harsh words,” the ruby-eyed angel commented with an offended look on her face, pressing a hand to her chest. “You shouldn’t shoot the messenger,” she remarked. It was not like it was her fault Kikyo died.

Sesshomaru did not respond. He wondered why the angels did not leave now that they had their souls. They had done their job, so they should have vanished. Instead, Kanna still stood there with her damned mirror still trained on the deceased priestess. And Kagura was still there, making him wish he could just gouge her throat out. He could not stand them and felt like they were taunting him with their presences.

“Why aren’t you two leaving?” the golden-eyed demon demanded. His voice was heavy with emotion now, anger and sorrow mixed together changing his tone into something totally new to him.

“We can’t leave yet. The job’s not done,” Kagura reported with a shrug.

“What more is there to do?” he demanded. He was sick of them now, not that he had been happy with their appearance in the first place. He was sick of everything. He just wanted everything to end because there was nothing anymore without Kikyo.

“Stuff,” she answered dismissively, going so far as to wave him off with a few motions of her hand.

“Kagura,” he growled impatiently at her. He was definitely tired of her and her damn attitude, but that was not new. She was such a damn pest. He could not wait until she fell because he would hunt her down and beat her senseless for all of the times that she purposely got on his nerves.

“You know, Sesshomaru, I just found out a few things not too long ago. For a long time, I thought this was the greatest thing that humans had been granted. This Garden, I mean.” Kagura made a sweeping motion with her hand. “It’s such a beautiful place with so much space and things to experience. I wouldn’t mind spending all of eternity just riding the winds here, but you know that. Recently, I just began considering having a freewill might be the greatest thing. You’re free to do whatever the hell you want without giving a fuck about a job. You never act on automatic because it’s a job. Your time is your own and you can do whatever makes you happy. You can find something to make you happy and you’ve done that. You took things a step further. You found the greatest gift in creation and that’s probably why she remained pure and why your child is pure. People are supposed to find companions,” she stated as if she knew exactly what she was talking about when she only understood some of it.

The guardian angel had learned the couple had never actually sinned, even if they did not know that. She guessed what they went through was a test, but she would never know for sure because to get that kind of information, she would need to be a seraph. She just knew they had not sinned; Sesshomaru just broke the rules and Kikyo had gone along and, surprisingly, breaking the rules did not always equal sinning. Who knew?

“And?” he inquired, wondering where the hell she was going with her rant.

“One of the key things about living is finding someone you connect with, someone that compliments you, someone who makes you a better you while accepting you and not forcing you to change,” the ruby-eyed angel continued on.

“How do you know that?” he asked, thinking that she was just talking out of her ass, so to speak, as was her usual. After all, angels did not know much about companionship, easily getting along with almost no personal contact from each other most of the time.

Kagura smiled. “Come on, Sesshy, give me a little credit.”

“Someone told you everything you’re going on about,” he guessed and her expression fell almost instantly. Score one for Sesshomaru finally.

“You’re no fun at all. Yes, someone told me. Must you always ruin my fun?” she huffed with her mouth turned up in anger and folding her arms across her chest. _He’s still such an arrogant dog and probably always will be_ , she thought.

“What’s your point, Kagura?” he snarled impatiently.

“Well, it’s just someone way at the top was talking to me. I mean, someone way up high was actually paying me some mind and telling me all of this crap and listening to me for once. So, anyway, I was going on about how love is supposedly a virtue and bullshit like that. And you guys are somewhere along that line or something like that. Figured it should count for something. I mean, what the hell are the virtues there for if they don’t count for anything? And why the hell were people being punished for following a virtue? And that someone laughed and agreed. After all the bullshit Kikyo’s gone through, a little reward is in order. After all the bullshit you both have gone through, you should get something for still being together. Punishment for sin and reward for a virtue. It seems fair, right?” Kagura replied. It sounded logical enough to her anyway.

“Reward?” he echoed in a puzzled tone. He could only wonder what the ruby-eyed angel was going on about now. Reward was not a word he used often and or even heard often during his time in the Heavens.

The ruby-eyed angel motioned over to Kanna with a wave of her hand. A soul emerged from the white-haired angel’s mirror and slowly made its way over to Kikyo’s body. The arrows that were in the body dropped out as the soul merged with her flesh. Kikyo let out a small groan and she had a couple of muscle ticks.

“All is forgiving, merciful, and understanding,” Kanna whispered in her monotone voice before disappearing.

“Take care of them, Sesshomaru. They’re going to be with you for a long time now. I mean, the kid is half immortal, so she might actually be all immortal and Kikyo’s soul is much like the original models now, so she’ll be around just as long. I know you remember how long humans used to live in the very beginning, after all. Apparently, you guys do deserve to be together after all the trials. You passed, for lack of a better term. I’ll see you around,” Kagura said before following Kanna with a vanishing act of her own.

“I know you will,” Sesshomaru replied. After all, the guardian angel was on borrowed time when it came to her remaining in the Heavens. So, he would definitely see her and he would definitely take care of his family.

Kikyo sat up and Sesshomaru could smell something different about her. It was as if he could smell that she would live the long life the first inhabitants of the Garden. She would be around just as long as he was going to be if that was the case. Her reward was to spend his life with him? Was she truly being so richly rewarded because of her love? Was he really being so richly rewarded because of her love? All was forgiving, merciful, and understanding like Kanna said then.

Sesshomaru might not want to admit it, but he knew it was not just her love that earned them so much time together. It was the fact that he returned the feeling. His sin of lust had evolved into the virtue of love and he rewarded for that. His fall was actually the right thing to do. He had been right and she had been right. He did not understand how that was, but he would argue with it at all. They were together and that was what mattered.

“Sesshomaru, what happened?” Kikyo asked in a low, almost sleepy as she hoped her head would stop spinning.

“Mommy?” Rin said with hope because she heard her mother’s voice. She had been busy bawling into her father’s chest and missed everything that had just happened. She turned to look and saw her mother sitting up. “Mommy!” she shouted with joy and flung herself into Kikyo’s arms. The child cried even harder than before.

“Shh, it’s all right, angel. It’s all right,” Kikyo tried to assure their baby. She rubbed Rin’s back to calm her down and then looked at Sesshomaru. “Did I die?” she asked in a low voice with a wrinkled brow. She recalled rising out of her body and seeing them before floating into some mirror. In the mirror, she had been bathed in light and she had felt as if everything was all right in her world.

“Yes,” he answered plainly.

“The men?” she inquired.

“Followed you to their demise,” he informed her in a matter-of-fact tone. He did not regret his actions, even if she was alive now. Those men deserved what they got in his opinion for having the nerve to fire upon a child, _his_ child.

The petite miko looked away for a moment, trying to gather her feelings about everything that happened. It was all so overwhelming, but she felt she had the strength to carry on. She had to keep going because she had been given another chance. She would take that chance and run with it.

“Sesshomaru,” she said after a few seconds.

“Yes?” he replied.

“We should leave here,” she finally agreed with him. It pained her to say such a thing because she hated to leave her mother’s home, but it was time to go. It was time to experience new and better things with her beloved and their child. It was time to be together with fewer worries.

“Indeed,” he concurred with a slight nod.

Kikyo glanced at her mother’s house with sorrowful eyes. She would never forget the only human to ever show her affection and love. Those memories were always in her head and in her heart, so she could leave the house. Her mother would always be with her, just like she would always be with her daughter. With that thought, she turned her attention to her weeping baby and embraced Rin just to feel the child against her.

“It’s all right,” she whispered once more, kissing the top of Rin’s head.

The priestess had to what was best for her daughter. It would be best for Rin for them to leave and for them to go see the rest of the world. They needed to find some place that she could grow up safe.

“Don’t worry, Kikyo. I will provide you with everything that you need,” Sesshomaru sincerely vowed.

“I have all that I need,” Kikyo replied with a small smile. She had her baby, her beloved, and her life. What more could she ask for? She was content and she felt very fulfilled. As long as she had those things everything would be fine and she was certain of that. Sesshomaru would still try to give her everything that he felt she deserved.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: the epilogue.


	21. Epilogue: Your Love Is King

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters, but you guys know that.
> 
> A/N: some borderline M-rated stuff here.

Epilogue: Your Love Is King

Eleven years later…

Kikyo moaned softly as she woke up. The sound made a certain pair of ears twitch. Her chocolate eyes fluttered open and she moaned again. She doubted she would ever get used to sleeping on such a comfortable and soft bed. As soon as her eyes completely opened, she stared directly at a pair of deep golden pools that she expected to see. She let loose a small, tender smile.

“Good morning, my Lord,” Kikyo greeted Sesshomaru while leaning up to give him a light kiss.

Sesshomaru was, in fact, a lord now. He had gone out and conquered some lands, just as he had promised to do one day, but he did not do it in a fashion that he intended. It actually happened by accident. About a decade ago, he and his family had wandered through a battlefield and the soldiers on both sides attacked the platinum-haired demon out of fear. Sesshomaru quickly dispatched of all of the assailants and both of the warring lords were so frightened of him and his power that they offered their lands for their lives. Sesshomaru accepted because he wanted somewhere for their little girl to grow up in peace and so far, the walls of their castle was such a place.

It could be argued that Rin grew up in a bubble behind the walls of the castle, but that was far from true considering the fact that the castle was like a small city. Rin got along with most of the people that lived in the palace and they seemed to like her as a person, not just because she was their princess. She was an affable person and most people recognized that. The few people that had some kind of problem with the princess made sure to keep it to themselves because no one wanted to incur the wrath of their Lord or Lady, who were recognized for the no-nonsense rulers that they were.

The couple was rather just. They were fair rulers and most of the subjects would agree that they preferred the pair to their former lords. Sesshomaru and Kikyo both believed they had a responsibility to the people on their lands and not that the people owed them something, like other nobles seemed to think. It probably helped that they understood what it was like to be oppressed or subjected to the whims of others.

“My Lady,” Sesshomaru replied to Kikyo’s greeting before going in for a proper kiss.

Sesshomaru was certain he had the best of all humans in his bed right now and that was what made her interesting. She was intelligent and she almost never allowed her emotions to override her reasoning. The only time emotion or instinct took over was when their offspring was in distress. She walked around with a dignity that she maintained and never compromised her beliefs or what she knew was right. She was raw, but refined and she stood her ground like she could do anything and it seemed like she actually could do anything. He loved the fact that she just never backed down. He loved her and she could tell that from the feel of his kiss.

Kikyo wrapped her arms around Sesshomaru’s neck to deepen the kiss that they were wrapped up in. What was about to happen was like clockwork with the couple. It was their habit; their bad habit, they assumed, in the morning. After all, they acted as if they had all the time in the world in the morning, even though they both had things to do and should get to as soon as possible. It was just that no one would dare to interrupt them; no one aside from their energetic progeny anyway. But, it was well known that they should not be disturbed once they were in their bedchambers.

They guessed they behaved as they did to make up for all of the time that they lost in the beginning. Well, there was that and they just felt an unfathomable connection when they were together. They hoped their relationship would always be like that; beyond physical, but in every aspect that there was in life. They hoped their relationship was always bottomless when it came to how deeply they felt about each other.

Sesshomaru moved over Kikyo, making sure not to break their enticing kiss. They were both already quite nude considering what they had done all of last night. It really seemed that they just could not get enough of each other and it went beyond physical intimacy. They just enjoyed being close to each other, knowing that the other was there. Very basic things.

Sesshomaru’s favorite pastime was actually to just sit and hold Kikyo while listening to her breath. She still enjoyed just feeling his heartbeat. It was a comfort to know that the other was nearby and really there. It proved their life now was not some delightful dream, but the truth and reality.

The couple pulled away for some needed air. The demon caught his breath before his mate as usual. When she was done drawing in precious air, he leaned down for another kiss, which was not as heated as the previous. He suddenly pulled away and just stared at her.

“Sesshomaru…” Kikyo whispered through gritted teeth because now he taunted her.

He loomed over her and not doing anything. They were not even touching as much as she liked. It felt like every nerve ending in her body was on high alert, desperate for attention. _He can be so cruel sometimes_ , she silently huffed.

“Yes?” he asked as if he did not know.

The demon liked making Kikyo do things that she usually would not do or things that she would only do in front of him. So, at the moment, he wanted her to ask for what she wanted, maybe even beg for it. He had done it several times before. It actually backfired on him a great deal of the time. Kikyo could do some great teasing of her own and it did not help matters that he had demon instincts now. The taunting typically depended on who had the upper hand and, at the moment, he was the one that was in control of the situation, which he liked, of course.

“Sessho…” the petite woman whispered harshly, grabbing his hair in a tight grip. She was very used to be touched in the morning and her whole day would seem off if that routine were changed. But, his day would be off too, but still, he was teasing.

“What is it, my dearest?” he asked while nuzzling his face in her neck. He loved the way that she smelled. No other creature in the world had her particular scent and he enjoyed inhaling it.

Sesshomaru licked at Kikyo’s throat for a moment, feeling for her pulse under his tongue. She tasted so good. She was like a dull, sweet honey. He reminded himself that he had to keep his resolve if he was going to continue to annoy her, at least for a little while longer. He would like to hear her at least tell him what she wanted.

“We don’t have time for this,” she pointed out. It was a weak excuse; Sesshomaru always insisted that no one’s day could start without him, so they were on his time and not the other way around. Hard to believe he was actually a good monarch with such an attitude.

Sesshomaru laughed into her neck, tickling her a little bit. He began to lightly kiss her smooth skin down to her collarbones. A clawed hand made feather-light trails up and down her side, causing her to whimper because of her desire for more contact. Perhaps, at some point in the past, Kikyo would have thought poorly of her own behavior, but she had long ago given that thought up. It was all right for her to want him to touch her. It was normal. It was natural. He was getting on her nerves, though.

In her mind, Kikyo planned to get back at Sesshomaru later that night since he wanted to continue to taunt her. She was not shy in the least when it came to him and she would tease him just as much as he teased when she got the chance. He would definitely feel her wrath when she got the chance.

“Sessho…” She breathed out his name as he made his way down, kissing his way to the valley between her breasts. He refused to go to either mound, though, because he was still taunting her.

“Shh,” he scolded her before lapping at the bottom of her right breast. He made sure not to apply any pressure, only to bother her more while continuing on with his task. She squirmed underneath him and tugged at his hair. He chuckled a little before dragging his tongue across her milky flesh.

“I’m going to… I’m going to…” she tried to speak her threat because he would get it later on. Her body arched, trying to find his.

“What?” he asked, even though he had a good feeling in regards to what she was going to say. He was not sure why he had to tease her, knowing it would bite him in the ass later on, but he did. There was something about watching her wiggle and want him that he found thoroughly amusing.

“Get you back,” she vowed with a near growl, which he thought was quite sexy.

The demon lord chuckled, even though his night was going to be hell. But, he continued to torture her because, little did she know, he somewhat enjoyed when she tormented him in return. He just liked it when she did things that she usually would not do because it let him know that she was absolutely comfortable around him. The way she acted when it was just the two of them, he would never say so out loud or even in his own head, but it made him feel special to know that he was the only one she would do such things with. She made him feel special; he did the same to her.

Of course, Kikyo had to feel special with Sesshomaru. He fell from Heaven to be with her. It was an overwhelming thought and it stayed on her mind all the time, reminding her just how much he had to care for her, how much he loved her.

Sesshomaru thought along the same lines. She had been with him, even though she knew the consequences would be great. She had bore his child and taken care of her on her own while waiting for him, having faith that he would some day return to her. How could he not love such a woman? He was glad she was his and he would make sure she knew that, so that she would always be his.

He continued on, making sure to touch Kikyo in places that she would like, but making sure not to do it in a manner that she liked. One of his hands moved to her inner thigh and lightly caressed the area, but he did not do anything more. He wanted to frustrate her and it was working. He could see it in those typically warm cocoa eyes. She actually frowned at him.

“Why are you being such a demon toward me?” she asked with some anger in her voice.

“Your words are only going to make me do worse things to you, my dear,” he replied with a smirk.

Kikyo frowned deeper because she knew what he wanted. He wanted her to beg him for it and she would not do. She would not play his game no matter how much she longed for his touch. He wanted her as much as she wanted him, so she would make him do what they both wanted.

The ebony-haired female wrapped her legs around Sesshomaru and locked them into position. Her actions did not surprise him, but he did not expect her to do such a thing so soon. She then attempted to pull him to her, but he resisted, even though he really desired to dive right in and enjoy her. When they were connected like that, it was paradise and he wanted that, but he would not let her win.

“Kikyo, dearest, what are you doing?” he inquired while making sure to sound as he usually did, even though he was fighting with himself to keep bothering her. He really desired nothing more than to just take her at that very moment, but he had started something and he wanted to finish it.

“Getting what I want,” she answered and that did not shock him. She was far from bashful around him after so many years.

Sesshomaru laughed a bit; he was the one that made her the way that she was now. It was his fault that she was so accepting of physical pleasure, even though so many people tried to make it seem as if it was a sin to enjoy matters of the flesh. There was nothing wrong with what they were doing and there was nothing wrong with the fact that he had made her the way she was; in fact, he was slightly proud of that fact. There was nothing wrong with them enjoying their time together. They should enjoy it. They were together to make each other happy in every way possible.

Sesshomaru leaned down and claimed Kikyo’s mouth with his own. As they passionately kissed, he finally obliged Kikyo, delighting the both of them. She cried out into his mouth because of the intrusion and latched onto his back as he began to move. They both doubted that they would ever get enough of each other.

“Sessho,” she whispered, hips rising to meet him.

“Yes?” he replied in a low tone.

“I love you.” She locked eyes with him and he felt like she could see into his soul. Whenever she said those words, it was like lightning ran through him and warmth settled into his heart.

“And I love you,” he replied, needing to kiss her again, needing to keep her close, needing for her to feel his words. She responded by pulling him closer, holding him tight.

-8-8-8-8-

Rin ran through the halls, a very bad habit of hers. She was a teenager now, but she was pretty much still the same little girl from a decade ago. She dressed in a haori and hakama because of how active she was. Every so often, people got strange ideas and attempted to dress her like the princess she was and every time that they had done that, by the time lunch rolled around, she would come to eat in what was left of layers of fine silk.

Sesshomaru generally stared in disbelief when Rin returned in rags that only hours ago were the best clothing that the kingdom had to offer. He just could not understand how she could ruin an outfit so quickly. Kikyo always only smiled when she saw her daughter at lunch after she was dressed in silks. She had always known royal robes would never work on their daughter. Actually, royal robes did not seem to work with either of them. Kikyo could not walk in royal clothing and gave up on wearing them quickly while Rin seemed to like to pretend that she would wear the clothes well and then lunch would roll around and she would look like she had just gotten away from a rogue bear attack.

Until recently, Rin generally wore a short yukata to give her the freedom to dash around all over the place. That was put to an end when she ran by her father one day and Sesshomaru noticed something, their once-little girl was now a big girl with big girl things that males might start looking at her if she continued to bolt around in such skimpy outfits. Kikyo suggested the clothing Rin now wore to calm poor Sesshomaru down. Rin took to the clothing like a fish to water and went back to running around.

Rin now looked very much like Kikyo, except that she still wore her ponytail from childhood. She still had her father’s ears and she actually inherited his claws. She acted nothing like either parents despite how much she looked like them. She ran almost everywhere that she needed to go. She also had a bad habit of being late for things, if she was lucky enough to remember she had a schedule anyway. She still grinned widely whenever she just wanted to smile and she got easily excited over the smallest things. She was very affectionate and loved nothing more than to hug or cuddle. She was the same Rin that she had always been.

She cut a corner and nearly mowed down a group of administrators, as was her norm. She turned around and grinned her apology to them, which they expected and accepted. She nearly knocked that same group over every morning. They were not sure if they found it amusing or shameful considering the fact that she was adorable, but she was also the heir to their kingdom while being so hectic. She charged into a garden, leaping off of the walkway onto a stone path. As soon as she touched down, she was nailed in the forehead with a ball.

“Wah!” Rin whined as she fell to the ground because of the unexpected hit.

“I told you it’ll hit her,” a voice declared and another laughed in response.

“You two are so in for it!” Rin proclaimed as she hopped to her feet. She had a red mark on the center of her head for only a few seconds before it disappeared completely.

The ebony-haired teen dashed toward a tree in the garden and two voices yelped in surprise. A pair of blue and white blurs dropped out of the tree and Rin chased down the two streaks. One of the blurs, the blue one, took a tumble, but that was not the one Rin wanted. She jumped and preformed a flying tackle on the white blur, which yelped again when they hit the ground.

“Ow, sis!” a little dog-eared hanyou complained as they came to screeching halt in the dirt.

“Don’t cry now, Kiba,” Rin replied and she began to administer his punishment for hitting her with that ball. She knew he was the culprit because he was the bad boy.

The teen began tickling the boy with her clawed hand. She was very careful with her claws, even though she was used to having them by now. She remembered being surprised when they grew in the first time. She had only been eight and she had been used to having regular nails back then. She had a lot of accidents those first couple of years with claws. But, now, she could tickle her little brother all day and not leave a mark on the scamp.

The little boy, Kiba, laughed his head off because of the punishment. He was Kikyo and Sesshomaru’s second child. He was ten years old with big golden eyes and platinum hair like their father. He wore a light blue, but the reason he looked like a white streak was because of his hair flowing behind him when he was running. His hair hung freely down his back just like his father’s.

Kiba was a troublemaker through and through. Rin affectionately referred to him a “the brat.” Little did she know, but most people considered her to be just as much of a brat as he was. The only difference was that she caused trouble by accident and he did it on purpose. Most people actually thought Kiba was just like Rin and he was in lot of ways. He was hyper and always running some place. He grinned all of the time instead of just smiling, but he had a naughty side to him. He was like Rin if she had been born a boy with a mischievous side as far as most people were concerned. Everyone wondered why their Lord and Lady only seemed to produce opposites of themselves.

Rin released Kiba and left him rolling around on the floor laughing. She wandered over to the other blur that fell. It was another little boy hanyou. He sniffed and looked down at his elbow. She had a feeling he hurt himself in his trip. She gathered the little boy dressed in dark blue in her arms.

“Sis! I got an owie!” he reported with tears in his cocoa eyes. Usually, such an emergency would have been reported to their mommy, but his big sister was closer, so it made sense to him to let her know he was hurt bad.

“Where’d you get an owie?” Rin inquired in an understanding tone. She knew an “owie” with him was typically a real injury.

“Here.” He pulled up his long sleeve with a clawed hand and showed his big sister a long gash on his elbow. He had a reason to cry as far as she could tell. His eyes, so much like their mother’s, began to overflow with tears.

“Oh, that looks bad,” Rin noted. His “owies” were always deep cuts or something stuck in his body, like a nail or a spike or one time when he managed to get impaled by a tree branch.

“It hurts,” he informed her with an angry pout. He seemed more insulted with the cut than in dire agony as he first made it seem. Cuts were always an affront to him after someone, always his mother or sister, came to his aid.

Rin bet the wound hurt. She put her index finger on the top of his scratch and slid her finger across it. The cut closed immediately. She had gotten very good with her healing talents now. She could do almost anything with her powers, except bring a person back to life. She could save animals and sometimes bring them back from the dead, but she could not do it with people. She was great at making flowers grow, though. She had personally filled all of the gardens with flowers. She was very good with her powers.

Rin had also learned to control the other side to her powers. She had also inherited Sesshomaru’s poison techniques. Her brothers could do it, too, but they were not very potent yet. She could hurt a lot of people if necessary, which her father liked because it gave people a reason not to mess with her and it gave her a way to punish people that wanted to be stupid, which he thought was a human hobby.

“Is he crying again?” Kiba inquired with a bit on attitude as he approached his siblings. He walked with his hands behind his head, as if he was a big shot.

“He cut his arm,” Rin replied to justify why the baby of their trio was in tears.

“And sis made it better!” the youngest declared with a smile.

“Sis always makes it better. You should stop falling, Ken-chan,” Kiba teased his little brother, grinning all the way through and showing off his ivory fangs.

“Don’t call me Ken-chan!” the youngest huffed in anger.

“Ken-chan, Ken-chan, Ken-chan!” Kiba shouted at the stop of his lungs in a taunting tone. He even had the nerve to do a little dance with it, knowing it would thoroughly irk the younger boy.

Kenshin, the youngest of the siblings, hated when his brother called him by the nickname that only their mother used. He already had problems with being the youngest and swearing that everyone treated him like a baby. Of course, they did treat him that way because he was the baby of the group. He was a proud little thing, always trying to act like an adult when people were looking, but he was so very clumsy. It was hard for him to act tough when he was busy tripping over his own pants or walking into a wall or something else like that.

“Stop it! Stop it!” Kenshin order his brother as he started chasing the older boy around. It would seem that he planned to make his big brother cease.

“Ken-chan! Ken-chan! Ken-chan!” Kiba called while dodging his little brother’s attacks.

Rin only watched her brothers running around. She thought about what would be happening right now if Jaken had to watch them. He would be yelling at the boys about how “master Sesshomaru wouldn’t like this” or something like that and not getting any results for his effort. He was no longer their babysitter since Rin was old enough to watch the boys and she liked doing that. Jaken was still her father’s vassal and undoubtedly still frustrated with the fact that her father did not take him seriously.

The teen focused on her little brothers. Kenshin still tried to hit Kiba to get him to shut up. She liked having little brothers, but she hoped she had a sister coming sometime in the future. Her brothers reminded her of Inuyasha. She still remembered him after so many years because he was the first interactive friend that she had. She wondered where he was and what he was doing sometimes. She could finally understand why he had to leave so long ago, but she never did bring the subject up to her mother. She was just thankful that her parents were together and happy; that was enough for her.

“Ah, you three are as active as always and so early in the morning. It’s annoying,” a female voice commented.

The three siblings all turned to the owner of the voice, Kagura. She stood a few feet away from them, floating only an inch off of the ground. She was a tangible being because she had fallen from the Heavens almost a year after Sesshomaru took his family away from that village. She had continued to grow envious, but not of the humans anymore. Yes, she still wanted to be in the human’s Garden, but she saw there was more to things than just being in the Garden.

The ruby-eyed angel had grown envious of Sesshomaru and the things that he had gained in his fall, like happiness and companionship. Because he was able to gain so much, she started to want things of her own and she was eventually banished for her deep envy. She felt in her heart she would prefer the fall and she graciously accepted it, looking at it as an act of mercy. Unfortunately, she had suffered from the same affliction as Sesshomaru when he fell; she lost her memory.

Kagura had wandered the globe with no guidance and no memory until she ran into none other than the person she deemed “the biggest jackass of all time” also known as Sesshomaru. Her memories came flooding back to her just from the sight of him. As soon as she was in her right mind, she fell right into line with getting on his nerves for a while. She quickly left him and his family because she wanted to truly enjoy her freedom and experience the humans’ Garden for herself. She came back to the family every-so-often because she liked being around Rin, who, in turn, loved the company. There was something about that kid that just brightened her day, Kagura realized.

The fallen angel, now a wind demon much to her surprise and delight, still wondered if one day an archangel would come for Rin. She had never gotten reassurance that would not happen, but it did not seem to be happening. No one had seen or sensed Naraku around, so they guessed Rin was all right. After all, she had not developed a taste for human flesh nor had she gone out of her mind and killed anyone. So, she was safe it seemed, much to her parents’ relief.

“Auntie Kagura!” the boys shouted with huge grins on their faces.

“Yo,” Kagura greeted them with a sharp, brief wave. “Where are your parents?” she asked curiously, as if she did not know.

“They haven’t gotten up yet,” Rin informed her.

Kagura nodded and made a noise. She bet the couple was working on some more dog-eared, hyperactive, insanely happy kids. She had come for a good, warm, home-cooked meal, followed by a nice, warm bath. Yes, Kagura sponged right off Sesshomaru, mostly because of Kikyo encouraging the behavior. Kikyo believed Kagura was Sesshomaru’s friend, even though he denied the charge, and she felt he should help out his friend. Sesshomaru claimed to put up with Kagura because the children liked her and her wind tricks.

“So, the morning grub hasn’t been served yet, huh?” Kagura asked while rubbing her stomach. She was fairly hungry, having not eaten all day yesterday. Sometimes, she just forgot to eat because she was having a good time just drifting through out the world. Hell, she was the wind and it felt good being the wind.

“Nope,” Rin answered.

“We should go wake them up,” Kagura mused out loud, even though she was almost certain about what they were doing. She hated that castle life revolved around that damn arrogant dog demon. And while he was on her mind, she wanted to know how in the hell he kept producing such adorable, jovial children. He was not either of those, so why were his kids?

-8-8-8-8-

“Mommy, Mommy, Mommy!” Kenshin yelled as she dashed toward Kikyo, who was at the other end of the hallway. He tripped along the way, but got back up like nothing happened, and eventually made it to her.

“Good morning, Ken-chan,” Kikyo smiled as she picked up her little boy. She kissed his cheek and hugged him tightly. She and Sesshomaru had been heading toward the garden to get the kids for breakfast, but ran into them on the way to the dining area, which meant they ran into Kagura, too. Her presence seemed to sour Sesshomaru’s mood, but it was hard to tell with him since annoyed and normal were just about the same expression.

“Ken-chan,” Kiba teased again and then he made a face at his little brother.

“And good morning, Kiba-chan,” Kikyo said to get the taunting to stop.

“Mom!” Kiba complained with a groan and his siblings laughed at him.

“Kagura, here to freeload again?” Sesshomaru seemed to huff, but he still sounded as he generally did, so it was hard to tell.

“Try as you might, but you can’t shame me, Sesshy,” Kagura remarked with a smile.

“Sesshy,” Kiba and Kenshin echoed with chuckles. Sesshomaru frowned; Kagura would probably always be annoying and she obviously was not a good role model for his younger children, but he already knew that.

The family went to have breakfast together, as they did every meal. They were close to each other and did plenty of things together, including Kagura when she was around. They spent their free time with each other and sometimes they even spent work time together. They just got along and they appreciated each other because they were all too aware that despite the wealth and privilege, all they really had was each other. They would always be together and so, they all took care of each other.

-8-8-8-8-

The End.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you wanna see more of my fanfics, they're all at FFN under [StarvingLunatic](https://www.fanfiction.net/~starvinglunatic). And last, if you wanna see some original stories, you can look at FP under [StarvingLunatic](https://www.fictionpress.com/u/576301/).


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